Cash Gifts Only: A Guide To Wedding Invitation Etiquette

It is generally considered impolite to ask for cash gifts on wedding invitations. However, there are other ways to politely indicate your preference for monetary gifts. One option is to include a wedding money poem in your invitations, which can be a cute and creative way to make your preference clear without being too direct. Another option is to create a small gift registry with a few physical items, and guests may get the hint that you would prefer cash. You can also include your wedding website on your invitations, where you can explain why you would like cash gifts and how you plan to use the money.

Include a wedding money poem in your invitation

While it is generally considered a faux pas to ask for monetary gifts on your wedding invitations, there are tactful ways to let your guests know that you would prefer cash over physical gifts. One way to do this is by including a wedding money poem in your invitation. Here are some examples of poems you can use:

"If a gift is on your mind,

A contribution would be kind.

It will help us more than words can say,

To celebrate our special day!"

"If a gift is your intention,

We thought we'd mention,

We'd love some pennies to rub together,

To save for something we will treasure!"

"As we've lived together for a year or two,

We really don't need anything new.

But if you were thinking of getting us a small wedding gift,

Some money for our future wouldn't go amiss."

"As we're getting married, we thought it would be great,

To move into a brand new home—we really can't wait!

As wedding gifts are bulky and we're a little short on space,

Some money would be the ideal gift to help us buy our place!"

"We know it's not traditional,

It's not the way it's done,

But instead of a wedding gift,

We'd like a bit of sun!"

When using a poem to request monetary gifts, be mindful that this approach may come across as forward or cheeky to some guests. To mitigate this, you can pair the poem with a brief explanation of why you are requesting cash instead of physical gifts. For example, you could mention that you already have a fully equipped home or that you are saving up for a specific goal, such as a honeymoon or a house deposit.

Create a small registry

Creating a wedding registry is an exciting part of your wedding planning journey. A small registry is a great way to let guests know what you need for your new life together without overwhelming them with choices. Here are some tips for creating a small registry:

Choose a select number of retailers:

Most couples have between one and three wedding registries. It's a good idea to include at least one registry tied to a physical store as not all guests will feel comfortable shopping online. Consider a mix of department stores, big box stores, and national chains. This way, your guests will have a variety of options to choose from without being bombarded with too many choices.

Curate a list of essential items:

Take an inventory of your home and think about what you need and what needs an upgrade. Focus on essential items that will be useful in your daily life as a married couple. This could include kitchen appliances, cookware, dining ware, bedding, bath towels, and home decor.

Include a mix of price points:

It's important to give guests options at different price points. Include a range of items at various price ranges, such as $50 and under, between $50 and $100, and over $100. This way, your guests can choose a gift that fits their budget.

Provide registry information appropriately:

While it's important to inform your guests about your registry, there is a right and wrong way to do so. Do not include registry information directly on your wedding invitations, as it may come across as expecting gifts. Instead, include your wedding website on your save-the-date and invitation, and provide registry details on the website. You can also rely on word-of-mouth; share the details with your immediate family and wedding party, and they can spread the word on your behalf.

Consider a cash fund:

If you're looking for a more straightforward approach, you can set up a cash fund wedding registry. This allows you to gather money for specific goals, such as home improvements, a honeymoon, or big-ticket items. Be sure to communicate what the funds will be used for so that guests understand their contribution.

Remember, your wedding registry is an evolution, and it's okay to continue adding to it as needed. The key is to create a registry that reflects your needs and preferences while providing a pleasant experience for your guests.

Don't include registry information on the invitation

It is considered poor etiquette to include any mention of gifts, including registry information, on a wedding invitation. This is because gifts are never required from guests, and doing so could send the wrong message to your guests, making them think that you expect them to bring a present.

Instead, you can include the address of your wedding website on an insert card within your stationery suite and detail your registry preferences there. You can also include the wedding website on your save-the-date, so everyone invited to the wedding can access it and figure out the details for themselves.

On your wedding website, be sure to explain why you've registered for cash and how you'll use the funds. For example, you could say: "Your presence at our wedding is enough of a gift, but should you wish to buy us something, we'd greatly appreciate a contribution towards our [insert cash fund]."

Another option is to ask your family members and close friends to spread the word about your preference for cash gifts. That way, if guests ask them what they should get you, they can suggest a contribution to your savings fund.

Include your wedding website on the invitation

While it is considered rude to ask for cash on your wedding invitations, it is perfectly acceptable to ask for monetary gifts instead of physical presents. Here are some tips for including your wedding website on your invitation, where guests can find more information about your preference for cash gifts:

Include an insert card with your invitation suite:

Rather than putting registry information directly on your wedding invitation, include an insert card with your overall stationery suite. This card can provide guests with the address of your wedding website, where they can find more details about your gift preferences. This approach allows you to indirectly guide guests towards your registry and avoid any potential offence.

Create an FAQ page on your wedding website:

Your wedding website is a great place to address the topic of gifts. Set up an FAQ page and include a question about gifts, with an answer that expresses your preference for monetary contributions. This approach makes it seem like you are addressing the issue of gifts in response to guest queries, rather than bringing it up unsolicited. Here are some examples of what you could write:

• "Your presence at our wedding is enough of a gift, but should you wish to buy us something, we'd greatly appreciate a contribution towards our [insert cash fund]."
• "The most important thing to us is that you're able to celebrate with us on our wedding day. However, if you wish to give a gift, we will graciously accept a contribution towards our [insert cash fund]."
• "Thank you for being a part of our special day. If you feel inclined to give us a wedding gift, a contribution towards our [insert cash fund] would be greatly appreciated."

Provide details about how you'll use the cash:

It's a good idea to be specific about how you plan to use the money. This adds a personal touch and makes guests feel more connected to your plans. For example, you might be saving for a honeymoon, a house deposit, renovations, or a new home. Explaining how the money will be used helps guests understand why monetary gifts are your preference.

Combine with a gift registry:

If you're nervous about asking for cash only, consider using a gift registry website that allows you to request both cash gifts and physical items. That way, you can give guests options and accommodate those who prefer to give traditional gifts.

Remember, it's essential to be tactful and considerate when asking for monetary wedding gifts. By including your wedding website on your invitation and following the tips above, you can politely communicate your preference for cash gifts to your guests.

Ask family and friends to spread the word

When it comes to your wedding, you may want to ask for cash gifts instead of physical presents. This is a perfectly acceptable thing to do, but it's important to be tactful about how you make your request. One way to do this is to ask your family and friends to spread the word. Here are some tips to help you navigate this approach:

Be Transparent with Your Inner Circle

First, be open and honest with your closest circle: your parents, siblings, wedding party members, and close friends. Let them know that you would prefer cash gifts and explain the reason why. It could be that you're saving for a dream honeymoon, planning a renovation, or maybe you're hoping to put a down payment on a new home. Whatever the reason, sharing it with your inner circle will help them understand your wishes and encourage them to support you.

Encourage Tactful Communication

Once your closest friends and family are aware of your preference for cash gifts, encourage them to tactfully spread the word. They can be your ambassadors. When guests reach out to them for gift suggestions, they can recommend contributing to your savings fund instead of a physical gift. This approach ensures that the message is conveyed in a polite and respectful manner, and it also allows your family and friends to actively participate in supporting your wishes.

Provide Details on Your Wedding Website

In addition to word-of-mouth communication, your wedding website is a powerful tool to convey your preferences. Create a dedicated section for your "registry" and share details about your plans for the cash gifts. Explain the purpose behind requesting monetary contributions, whether it's for a special trip, a home improvement project, or another meaningful goal. Adding a personal touch to your story will help guests feel more connected to your plans and more inclined to contribute.

Prepare for a Mix of Gift Preferences

While you may prefer cash gifts, it's important to acknowledge that some guests will still prefer to give physical presents. Respect their wishes and be prepared to receive a mix of gifts. You can make this easier by creating a small traditional registry with a few selected items that you truly want or need. This ensures that guests who want to give physical gifts have guidance, and it also helps you avoid receiving duplicate or unnecessary items.

Express Gratitude for All Gifts

No matter what type of gifts you receive, always remember to express your gratitude. Send handwritten thank-you notes to all your guests who gave gifts, whether they contributed cash or presented you with a physical item. Their generosity is a gesture of their love and support for your new chapter in life, and a heartfelt thank-you note is a meaningful way to acknowledge their kindness.

Remember, while it's acceptable to ask for cash gifts, the approach you take is crucial. By involving your family and friends in spreading the word, you can ensure that your wishes are communicated with grace and tact.

Frequently asked questions