Addressing Wedding Invites: Including 'Plus One' Guests

Wedding invitations are an important part of the wedding planning process as they inform guests of the details of the celebration and set the tone for the event. When addressing wedding invitations, it is crucial to consider the relationship status, honorific titles, and whether the guest is bringing a plus-one. The format for addressing guests also varies depending on the formality of the wedding and cultural context. This guide will provide an overview of how to address wedding invitations with guests, ensuring that you follow the appropriate etiquette.

Married couples with the same last name

When addressing wedding invitations to married couples with the same last name, there are a few different options to consider. The chosen option may depend on the couple's preferences and the level of formality desired. Here are some examples of how to address such invitations:

Formal Option 1:

Outer envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. [Husband's first name] [Shared last name]"

Inner envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. [Shared last name]" or " [Husband's first name] and [Wife's first name]"

Formal Option 2:

Outer envelope: "Mr. [Husband's first name] [Shared last name] and Mrs. [Wife's first name] [Shared last name]"

Inner envelope: "Mr. [Husband's first name] and Mrs. [Wife's first name]" or " [Husband's first name] and [Wife's first name]"

Informal Option:

Outer envelope: "Mr. [Husband's first name] and Mrs. [Wife's first name] [Shared last name]"

Inner envelope: " [Husband's first name] and [Wife's first name]"

It is worth noting that the outer envelope should be more formal, usually including titles and full names. The inner envelope can be more informal, allowing for the use of just the first names of the couple. Additionally, the format for the outer envelope works for couples of all genders, and the names can be ordered alphabetically if the couple prefers.

Married couples with different last names

When addressing wedding invitations to married couples with different last names, there are a few options to consider. Here are some guidelines and examples to help you format the invitations appropriately:

Outer Envelope:

The outer envelope is typically more formal and includes the full names and personal titles of the recipients. When addressing a married couple with different last names, write their names on the same line with the woman's name first, followed by the man's name. Use appropriate titles such as "Ms." for the woman and "Mr." for the man. Here's an example:

"Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez"

If the combined names are too long to fit on one line, you can list them separately, with the woman's name first. For example:

"Ms. Maria Stevens

Mr. David Estevez"

Inner Envelope:

The inner envelope is more informal, and you have the option to be more casual. You can include their first names or use a combination of names and titles. Here are some examples:

"Ms. Stevens and Mr. Estevez"

"Maria and David"

Including Children:

If you are inviting children along with the married couple, there are a few ways to address the invitation:

• Include the children's names on a separate line below the parents' names: "Mr. John Smith, Ms. Jane Doe, Joe Smith"
• Use a family title: "The Smith-Doe Family" or "The Family of Mr. John Smith and Ms. Jane Doe"
• Address the outer envelope to the parents only and specify the children on the inner envelope.

Remember to respect the choices of the couple regarding their names and titles. It is always a good idea to ask them beforehand if you are unsure about their preferred format.

Unmarried couples living together

When addressing wedding invitations to unmarried couples living together, it is important to include both guests' full names—first and last—on the invitation, even if you have never met the other half of the couple. This rule applies to both the inner and outer envelopes.

For the outer envelope, you can use titles and surnames, for example: "Mr. John Smith and Ms. Sophia Devine". Alternatively, you can leave out the titles and use first and last names, for instance: "John Smith and Sophia Devine". If the couple has different last names, write their names on separate lines. It is also a good idea to list the person you are closest with first, or go in alphabetical order if you are equally close to both guests.

For the inner envelope, you can use titles and surnames, e.g. "Mr. Smith and Ms. Devine", or opt for a more casual approach with just first names, e.g. "John and Sophia".

If you are unable to learn the other person's name before sending out the invitations, you may write “and guest” on the invitation. However, it is always preferable to include the name of the significant other to avoid any potential misunderstandings or hurt feelings.

Single people with a plus-one

When it comes to addressing wedding invitations to single people with a plus-one, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it is important to use the guest's preferred title, such as "Mr.", "Ms.", or "Mx.". If you are unsure, it is better to forgo the title altogether.

Secondly, if you know the name of the plus-one, it is best to include them by name on the invitation. This can be done by addressing the outer envelope to the single guest and writing the plus-one's name on the inner envelope. For example, "On the outer envelope: Ms. Ali Johnson; On the inner envelope: Ms. Johnson and Guest Name".

If you do not know the name of the plus-one, you can simply write "and Guest" on the inner envelope. For example, "On the outer envelope: Mx. Sam Li; On the inner envelope: Sam Li and Guest". Alternatively, you can include a note on the invitation itself or on the RSVP card, stating that the guest is invited to bring a plus-one. This way, you can avoid assumptions and give your guest the freedom to choose their date.

It is also worth noting that you are not obligated to offer a plus-one to every single guest. If budget or space is a concern, it is perfectly acceptable to be selective and only offer plus-ones where you think they are needed.

Families with children

When addressing wedding invitations to families with children, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it is important to specify whether the entire family is invited or only specific members. If you want to invite the whole family, you can simply address the envelope to "The [Last Name] Family". This implies that all family members, including children, are invited to both the ceremony and reception.

However, if you only want to invite certain family members, it is best to list their names individually. Start with the parent or parents' names, followed by the names of the invited children in order of age. For young girls under the age of 18, it is customary to use the prefix "Miss". Here is an example of how to address the outer and inner envelopes in this case:

Outer envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Alan Thompson" or "The Thompson Family"

Inner envelope: "Alan, Emily, Roger, Chance, Miss Jennifer, and Miss Lily"

Alternatively, you can use the parents' first names on the inner envelope:

Outer envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Alan Thompson" or "The Thompson Family"

Inner envelope: "Alan, Emily, Roger, Chance, Miss Jennifer, and Miss Lily"

If you are using only an outer envelope, another option is to include the names of the children on the same line as the parents, with the prefix "Miss" for young girls:

Outer envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Alan Thompson, Roger, Chance, Miss Jennifer, and Miss Lily"

Remember to consider the formality of your wedding when addressing the invitations. While it is traditional to use titles and last names, you may choose to use only first names if your wedding is more casual. However, it is always best to err on the side of formality, especially if you have older or more conservative guests.

Frequently asked questions