The Best Man's Guide To Toasting The Newlyweds

The best man's speech is a wedding tradition that can strike fear into the hearts of many, but it's a great honour to be asked and a chance to celebrate the happy couple. While it's not obligatory, the best man's toast is a chance to wish the newlyweds a happy future together and to share a few funny stories about the groom. It's also an opportunity to thank the bridesmaids and to honour absent friends and family.

The best man's speech is typically given after the father of the bride and the groom have spoken. It's a chance to inject some humour into the proceedings, but it's also a chance to be sincere and to speak from the heart. The best man might also act as the MC, introducing each of the speakers.

If you're worried about public speaking, you can keep your speech short and sweet, and there's nothing wrong with reading from notes. You could also ask another groomsman to join you, or even swap with someone else entirely.

The Best Man's Role

The best man's speech is a wedding staple, but it can be a daunting task for those with a fear of public speaking. The best man's toast is the perfect way to end the speech, and traditionally, the best man toasts the newlyweds, wishing them a happy future together.

Who Does the Best Man Toast?

The best man traditionally toasts the bride and groom, but it is also common to include a nod to the bridesmaids and to honour absent friends and family. The best man might also be tasked with relaying messages from those who couldn't attend the wedding.

What to Include in the Best Man's Toast

The best man's toast should be a blend of humour and sincerity. It should be personal, sharing anecdotes about the couple and the best man's friendship with the groom. It should also be sincere, speaking from the heart about what makes their love special. Finally, it should include some well-placed, tasteful jokes to lighten the mood.

Examples of Best Man Toasts

> "To [Groom] and [Bride], two people who were made for each other. Your love story is one for the ages. May your marriage be filled with laughter, passion, and deep friendship. Let’s raise our glasses to the perfect couple!"

> "True love isn’t about finding someone you can live with; it’s about finding the person you can’t live without. [Groom] and [Bride], it’s clear that you have found your soulmates in each other. May your love continue to grow and flourish."

> "To my best friend and his beautiful bride: the new Mr and Mrs [Name]."

> "They say you don’t marry the person you can live with, you marry the person you can’t live without. That sums up [Name] and [Name] perfectly. To the happy couple!"

Tips for Delivering the Best Man's Toast

The best man's toast should be 3-5 minutes long, with only the best stories and messages included. It should be practised beforehand, with feedback from friends, to ensure it stays within the time limit and comes across as sincere and humorous.

Alternative Options

If the best man is very uncomfortable with public speaking, there are alternative options. The best man could write a speech and have someone else deliver it, or they could record a video message to be played during the reception.

Toasting the Bride and Groom

Who Toasts the Bride and Groom?

The traditional wedding toast order is the father of the bride, the groom, and the best man. However, this is not set in stone and can be mixed up to suit the couple.

The best man's speech should be funny but genuine and showcase the couple's relationship and the groom's character. It should also highlight the bridesmaids' support and the couple's friends and family who couldn't be there.

The best man should be thoughtful and sincere, but also add a touch of humour to the speech. It should be 3-5 minutes long and well-rehearsed. The best man should also remember to ask the room to raise their glasses to the happy couple.

Best Man Toast Examples

"To [Groom] and [Bride], two people who were made for each other. Your love story is one for the ages. May your marriage be filled with laughter, passion, and deep friendship. Let’s raise our glasses to the perfect couple!"

"True love isn’t about finding someone you can live with; it’s about finding the person you can’t live without. [Groom] and [Bride], it’s clear that you have found your soulmates in each other. May your love continue to grow and flourish."

"To my best friend and his beautiful bride: the new Mr and Mrs [Name]."

Toasting the Bridesmaids

The bridesmaids have been there for the bride through thick and thin. Your toast should recognise their support and the special bond they share with the bride. There may or may not be a maid of honour speech, so make sure you mention the bridal party and how amazing they are.

Tips for Toasting the Bridesmaids:

• Express gratitude: Thank them for their support and friendship. Even if they are not your friends, they mean a lot to the bride.
• Be complimentary: Highlight how stunning they look and their important role in the bride's life. There must be nice things to say, so find a few.
• Inject humour: Tease them lightly and keep it playful. An easy win is to compare them to the groomsmen.

Examples of Toasts for the Bridesmaids:

"I'd like to take a moment to recognise the lovely bridesmaids. You look stunning today, like a bouquet of beautiful flowers surrounding our radiant bride. Your friendship is a testament to the amazing woman [Bride] is. Cheers to the bridesmaids!"

"A toast to the bridesmaids: You've been [Bride]'s] support system, her partners in crime, and her confidantes. Here's to strong friendships and unbreakable bonds. To the bridesmaids!"

"Ladies, you are the unsung heroes of the wedding party. Your support and friendship have been invaluable to [Bride]. Let's raise a glass to the bridesmaids!"

Tips for the Best Best Man Toast

Crafting a standout best man toast requires a blend of preparation, sincerity, and a touch of humour. Here are some key tips to ensure your best man toast hits all the right notes and leaves a lasting impression on the wedding guests.

Your speech should be like a perfectly crafted cocktail: strong enough to make an impact but not so lengthy that it loses the audience. Aim for 3-5 minutes, which is just enough time to share a few heartfelt anecdotes, crack a couple of jokes, and deliver a meaningful message. Overly long speeches can become tiresome and lose their effectiveness.

Set a Time Limit:

Practice with a timer to ensure you stay within the 3-5-minute range.

Be Selective:

Choose only the best stories and messages to include in your speech.

Avoid Rambling:

Stay focused on your main points and avoid going off on tangents.

Just like learning a new dance, the more you practice, the more confidently you can perform. Rehearse your speech multiple times to get the timing and delivery right. Practising out loud will help you get used to the sound and pace.

Rehearse Out Loud:

Speaking your speech aloud will help you get used to the sound and pace.

Record Yourself:

Listen to a recording of your speech to identify areas for improvement.

Practice in Front of Friends:

Get feedback from friends to help refine your delivery.

Use Humour Thoughtfully:

Humour can be the icing on the cake for your speech, but it should be used thoughtfully. A few well-placed jokes can lighten the mood and engage the audience, but avoid anything too embarrassing or offensive. Your goal is to entertain, not to roast the groom.

Know Your Audience:

Tailor your humour to be appropriate for the broad, multi-generational audience.

Balance Humour and Heartfelt Moments:

Ensure that your jokes do not overshadow the sincere parts of your speech.

Avoid Inside Jokes:

Stick to humour that everyone can appreciate, not just those who know the backstory.

Speak from the Heart:

Your words should come from a place of genuine affection and sincerity. Focus on your friendship with the groom and what makes the couple so special together. Share anecdotes that highlight the groom's best qualities and how the bride brings out the best in him.

Personal Anecdotes:

Share stories that illustrate the groom's character and your friendship.

Express Genuine Emotions:

Don't be afraid to show your emotions; sincerity resonates with the audience.

Highlight the Couple's Strengths:

Talk about what makes the couple a perfect match and why their relationship is inspiring.

Finish your speech with a clear, positive toast to the newlyweds. Your closing words should set the tone for the celebration, leaving everyone feeling uplifted and excited for the couple's future.

Craft a Memorable Closing:

Summarise your main points and end with a heartfelt wish for the couple's happiness.

Raise Your Glass:

Invite everyone to join you in toasting the bride and groom.

Stay Positive and Upbeat:

End with a message of joy and optimism for the couple's journey ahead.

Toasting Absent Friends and Family

The best man is traditionally the person to give a toast to absent friends and family at a wedding. This is a way to honour those who cannot attend and acknowledge their significance to the couple. It is a way to celebrate the enduring bonds of friendship and family, and to ensure their memory remains vivid and cherished.

The best man's speech usually comes after the father of the bride, who is considered the host of the wedding and will welcome the guests, and the groom, who will thank everyone for their help in organising the wedding and share the story of his relationship with the bride. The best man's speech is the perfect opportunity to add some humour to the proceedings, and he will often relay messages from those who couldn't attend.

The toast to absent friends and family is a chance to acknowledge those who are not present, whether due to distance, health, or other commitments. It is a way to include them in the celebration and ensure their presence is felt, even if only in spirit. This tradition has evolved over time, but its core message remains the same: to celebrate the enduring bonds of friendship and family, no matter the circumstances.

When making this toast, it is important to choose an appropriate tone, whether sentimental, celebratory, or a mix of both. Keep the content sincere, concise, and impactful. Include personal stories or memories of the absent friends and family, and be sure to discuss the reasons for their absence. Here is an example:

> "We raise our glasses to those who have touched our lives but couldn't be here today. Your love and support mean the world to us, even from afar."

This toast is a way to include absent friends and family in the celebration, ensuring that all who are part of the couple's life are acknowledged and honoured.

Best Man Speech Tips

Being chosen as the best man at a wedding is an honour and a big responsibility. One of your main tasks is to give a memorable speech. It's your chance to celebrate the groom, entertain the guests, and show your support for the happy couple. Here are some tips to help you deliver a great best man's speech:

Preparation

Before you start writing your speech, take some time to brainstorm. Write down all your thoughts, feelings, memories, and anecdotes about the groom. Think about every story, funny or touching moment, or event that involves the groom. Search your memory for anything that is humorous, interesting, or endearing. Also, make a note of the groom's positive qualities and the impact the bride has had on him.

Structure

Use a template as a guide to help you structure your speech. Start by introducing yourself as the best man and try to get the audience laughing early on. Then, mention any special guests and acknowledge the bride. Talk about how you met the groom and share some stories or anecdotes. This is also an opportunity to embarrass the groom affectionately! After that, say something about the bride, their family, and their future together. Finally, raise a toast to the couple.

Delivery

Practise your speech as much as possible. Rehearse it in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend. Remember to connect with the audience by maintaining eye contact, speaking clearly, and using hand gestures. Keep your speech concise—around 4-7 minutes is ideal. If you're nervous, take some deep breaths and slow down. Visualise yourself as a great speaker and kill those nerves!

Content

While it's traditional to embarrass the groom with some light-hearted jokes, there are some things you should avoid. Don't tell embarrassing stories about anyone else, and steer clear of need-to-know details that could cause problems for the couple or anyone else. Also, avoid commenting on the appearance of anyone you don't know well, including the bride. Keep the focus on the groom and the positive impact the couple has had on each other.

Timing

Keep your speech concise and stick to the timeline. A good length is around 2-7 minutes. Anything longer risks losing the attention of the guests, and there are usually multiple speeches, so you want to keep things moving.

End your speech with a memorable closing that ties back to the theme of your speech and expresses your well-wishes for the couple. Ask everyone to raise their glasses and propose a toast to the happy couple.

Good luck!

Frequently asked questions