Wedding Invite Etiquette: 'Presentation' Wording Explained

When it comes to wedding invites, there are a few essential elements that need to be included. These are the host's name, a request line, the couple's names, the date, time and location of the ceremony, and the reception details. The dress code and RSVP details are optional but often included. The wording can be formal, casual, creative, modern, or simple, depending on the couple's preference and the tone they want to set for their wedding.

The host line: Who is hosting the wedding?

The host line is the first line of a wedding invitation and indicates who is hosting (and traditionally, paying for) the wedding. It is common for the bride's parents to host and pay for the wedding, but nowadays, there are many different possibilities, such as the groom's parents hosting, both families hosting, or the couple hosting.

Bride's Parents Hosting

The traditional format is:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Father's First Name] [Bride's Last Name] request the honour of your presence

If the parents have different surnames, it can be written as:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Father's First Name] [Father's Last Name] and Ms. [Mother's First Name] [Mother's Maiden Name] [Mother's Last Name]

Groom's Parents Hosting

The format is similar to the bride's parents:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Father's First Name] [Groom's Last Name] request the honour of your presence

A less formal version could be:

> [Father's First Name] and [Mother's First Name] [Groom's Last Name]

Groom's and Bride's Parents Co-Hosting

If both sets of parents are sharing expenses, list both sets of parents as hosts, starting with the bride's family:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Bride's Father's First Name] [Bride's Father's Last Name] and Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's Father's First Name] [Groom's Father's Last Name] invite you to share in the ceremony uniting their children

Couple Hosting

If the couple is hosting the wedding, the host line can be omitted. However, if you want to include it, it could be worded as:

> Miss [Bride's First Name] [Bride's Last Name] and Mr. [Groom's First Name] [Groom's Last Name] together with their parents request the pleasure of your company

Divorced Parents Hosting

List each parent's name on a separate line, starting with the mother, without an "and" between them. If the mother has not remarried, use the title "Mrs." followed by her first name, maiden name, and then married name. For example:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Father's First Name] [Father's Last Name] and Ms. [Mother's First Name] [Mother's Maiden Name] [Mother's Last Name] request the honour of your presence

If the divorced parents have remarried, it is acceptable to include the stepparents' names. List the mother's name (and new husband's name) first, along with her last name:

> Mr. and Mrs. [Mother's First Name] [Mother's Maiden Name] [Stepfather's First Name] [Mother's Last Name] and Mr. and Mrs. [Father's First Name] [Father's Last Name] request the honour of your presence

Honouring a Deceased Parent

If you want to include a deceased parent on the invitation, omit courtesy titles and use a phrase such as "the late" before the name. For example:

> [Bride's Name], daughter of Mr. [Father's Name] and the late [Mother's Name], and [Groom's Name], son of Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's Father's Name], request the honour of your presence

The attendance request: How do you invite guests to attend?

The attendance request, or request line, is where you invite your guests to join your wedding celebration. This is where you can set the tone for your wedding. Traditionally, couples would include formal wording in the request line to denote a formal religious ceremony, whereas modern celebrations tend to use more casual language.

• "Request the honour of your presence"
• "The pleasure of your company"
• "Invite you to join"
• "Please join us to celebrate"
• "Love the pleasure of your company"

You can also add in a religious element to the request line, such as:

• "Request the honour of your presence at the marriage of their daughter"
• "At the marriage of their children"
• "At the celebration of their union"
• "As they say 'I do'"
• "In celebration of their marriage"

If you're having a non-religious ceremony, you can use wording such as:

• "Would love for you to join them"
• "Invite you to celebrate with them"
• "Request the pleasure of your company at their wedding"
• "Invite you to share in their joy as they become husband and wife"
• "Invite you to their wedding on [date]"

The request line is usually followed by the couple's names, the date, time, and location of the ceremony, and the reception details.

The couple's names: How do you list the couple's names?

The couple's names are the most important part of the wedding invitation. Here are some tips on how to list the couple's names:

• The names of the couple are usually displayed in larger text and sometimes in a fancy typeface.
• For heterosexual couples, the bride's name traditionally comes before the groom's.
• For same-sex couples, the traditional rule of the woman's name first does not apply. Instead, the names can be listed in alphabetical order or based on what sounds better.
• If the couple is hosting the wedding themselves, the host line can be omitted.
• If the couple has different last names, list the person you are closest with first, or go in alphabetical order.
• If one person in the couple has a distinguished title, such as a doctor, lawyer, or judge, this can be included in the listing of the couple's names.
• In general, avoid abbreviations and spell out everything except courtesy titles. However, this rule does not apply to the street address of the venue.
• If the couple has unique ideas for their wedding or wants to keep it small, they may choose to skip the host line or start the wording with a welcoming introduction.
• It is acceptable to use only first and last names if the wedding is casual.

Date, time and location: How do you format the date and time?

The date, time and location are essential details to include in your wedding invitation. Here are some tips on how to format them:

Date

The traditional way to write the date on a wedding invitation is to spell it out completely, rather than using numerals. For example, for a wedding taking place on Saturday, October 26th, 2024, you would write: "Saturday, the twenty-sixth of October two thousand twenty-four".

• Capitalize the day of the week (unless your wedding invitation's font is all uppercase or lowercase) and use a comma between the day and the date, e.g. "Saturday, the twenty-sixth... ".
• If the date falls between the 21st and 31st of a month, use a hyphen between the tens and ones place, e.g. "the twenty-sixth".
• Write out the month in full with a capital letter and no abbreviations, e.g. "of October".
• The year is usually on a separate line with no comma between the month and year, e.g. "two thousand twenty-four". You can choose to include "and" in the year, e.g. "two thousand and twenty-four".
• It is recommended to include the day of the week and the year, but this is not necessary.

For a more casual wedding, you can write the date more informally, e.g. "Saturday, May 17th, 2025". Alternatively, you can use numerals as a design choice, e.g. "Saturday, 8/15/2026".

Time

There are several ways to write the time of day on your invitations, depending on the formality of your wedding.

For a traditional, formal wedding invitation:

• Write out the time in full, with no numerals, e.g. "half after three o'clock" for 3:30 pm.
• For times on the hour, simply write the number, e.g. "four o'clock".
• Formal invitations traditionally use "half after" (not "half past") for times on the half-hour.
• Write the time in lowercase letters, e.g. "half after three o'clock".
• You don't need to write "in the morning", "in the afternoon", or "in the evening" unless the time is between 8-10 am or pm, where there could be confusion over whether it's morning or evening.
• Any time after 5 pm is considered evening, and between noon and 4:30 pm is the afternoon. For noon, just write "twelve o'clock" or "noon".

For a more casual wedding, you can write the time using numerals, e.g. "4pm" or "5:30pm". Just ensure that the date and time match in formality.

Location

The location of your wedding should include the name and full street address of the venue, including the state and zip code. If your wedding is abroad, include the country as well.

You don't need to include the street address if the location is obvious to your guests or if the wedding is at a private residence.

For very formal invitations, it is customary to write out the full address, including the "on" before the date and "at" before the location, e.g. "on Sunday, the fourth of May, two thousand fourteen, at Saint Philip's Episcopal Church".

For a more streamlined look, you can leave out the "on" and "at", e.g. "Sunday, the fourth of May, two thousand fourteen, Saint Philip's Episcopal Church".

For a casual wedding, you can use abbreviations and a more informal tone, e.g. "on Sunday, May 4th, 2014, at St. Philip's Episcopal Church".

Additional Tips

• Be consistent with the date and time formatting on any enclosures in your invitation suite, such as the response card.
• If the reception follows immediately after the ceremony in the same location, you can simply write "reception to follow" or "dinner and dancing to follow".
• If the reception is at a different time and/or location, include a separate reception card with the details.
• Traditionally, the end time of the wedding is not included on the invitation, but you can include this information on your wedding website if needed.
• To avoid late guests, you can print an earlier start time on your invitations, but it's best not to pad the time by more than 15 minutes.

Reception details: What happens after the ceremony?

The reception is when the couple receives society, in the form of family and friends, for the first time as a married couple. The reception can take many forms, from a simple luncheon to a grand ball, and is usually held in the evening after the ceremony. Here is a step-by-step guide to the reception:

Photos, Cocktails and Canapés (1-2 hours)

The couple will usually take formal photos with the wedding party and close family members. Meanwhile, the guests will be ushered to the cocktail hour, where they can enjoy drinks, canapés and entertainment while they wait.

The Wedding Breakfast (2-2.5 hours)

After the photos, the couple will be introduced and walk into the reception as newlyweds, to the cheers and claps of their loved ones. All guests are then seated for a sit-down meal, usually consisting of three courses: a starter, main course, and dessert or wedding cake.

Speeches and Toasts (30 minutes - 1 hour)

Traditionally, the speeches and toasts are given by the groom, the best man, and the father of the bride. However, at modern weddings, the bride, maid of honour, or other guests may also speak. Each speech ends with a toast to the couple, the wedding party, and/or the guests.

Room Turnaround (30 minutes - 1 hour)

After the wedding breakfast, the caterers will clear up and the venue staff will prepare the room for the evening reception. The DJ or band will also set up their equipment during this time. Guests may go home to change or freshen up, or they can stay and socialise. This is also when evening-only guests will start to arrive.

The Grand Entrance (5 minutes)

Once all the guests have arrived, the coordinator or MC will ensure everyone is seated and make them aware of the couple's imminent arrival. Both sets of parents are introduced and walk into the reception, followed by the couple.

The Cake Cutting (10 minutes)

The couple will cut the first piece of the cake, and may feed a bite to each other. Then the cake is served to the guests.

The First Dance (5 minutes)

The couple will dance their first dance as husband and wife, usually a soft rock ballad or a choreographed routine.

The Parent Dances (5-10 minutes)

The father-daughter dance and the mother-son dance are entirely optional, but if they take place, they signal the start of the party portion of the reception.

The Party (3-5 hours)

The couple and their wedding party will get everyone out on the dance floor. The bouquet and garter toss may also take place during this time. If there is a buffet or other catering, it will usually start around 8-9pm. The couple should remember to eat and drink during this time too!

The Farewell (10-20 minutes)

The couple will quietly leave the reception and the guests will say their goodbyes. The guests will then throw confetti or blow bubbles as the couple departs.

Frequently asked questions