Rsvp Etiquette: Wedding Invitation Response Card Basics

Wedding invitations are a chance for couples to showcase their style and the formality of their celebration. While the design, font, and colour are important, the wording is also key. The wedding RSVP, short for the French phrase répondez, s'il vous plaît (please reply in English), is an important element of the invitation. It allows couples to finalise their guest list and ensure a smooth wedding planning process.

RSVP cards are usually sent out with the official wedding invitation, around six to eight weeks before the wedding.

What does RSVP stand for?

When you receive a wedding invitation, it's essential to respond with an RSVP as soon as possible. But what does RSVP stand for?

RSVP is derived from the French phrase "répondez, s'il vous plaît," which translates to "respond, if you please" or "please reply." It is a signal to guests that the host kindly requests a response to their invitation.

The RSVP card is a crucial piece of the wedding invitation suite, allowing the couple to finalize their guest list and make necessary arrangements for the big day. It is considered proper etiquette to respond to an RSVP promptly and provide all the requested information, such as the number of guests attending, meal preferences, and any dietary restrictions.

Traditionally, RSVP cards included a line with an "M," which simply indicates the beginning of the person's title, such as Mr., Miss, Mrs., or Ms., followed by their full name. However, modern RSVP cards often replace the "M" with "Name" or a blank line to avoid confusion.

It's important to note that the RSVP deadline is usually about two to three weeks before the wedding. Late RSVPs can cause inconvenience for the couple and may result in a lack of seating or meals for guests who respond after the deadline.

When to send wedding RSVP cards

Wedding RSVP cards are a crucial part of your wedding stationery suite, providing an easy way for you and your guests to manage your invitations. It is standard etiquette to ask guests to RSVP around one month before your wedding date. This gives you enough time to chase up any stragglers and get a final headcount for your vendors.

You should order your RSVP cards when you order your wedding invitations so that you can send them out together. It is also important to include postage on the RSVP envelopes so that your guests don't have to dig around for stamps.

The RSVP deadline should be included on the card and should be no less than one month before the wedding date. The card should also include a reply-by date, with a suggested time frame of three to four weeks to give you plenty of time to follow up with guests who haven't replied and to give your caterers and other vendors a final headcount.

When it comes to the content of the card, there are a few key elements. Firstly, a header such as "Kindly Respond" or "RSVP". Secondly, the reply-by date. Thirdly, a space for guests to indicate whether they will be attending, with fun or formal wording such as "Can't wait!" or "Accepts with pleasure". Fourthly, a space for guests to write their names. Finally, a space for any additional information such as dietary requirements or song requests.

What to include on a wedding RSVP card

A wedding RSVP card is a crucial part of the wedding stationery suite. It is the first glimpse guests will have of the wedding theme and allows the host to finalise the guest list and ensure a smooth wedding planning process. Here is what to include on a wedding RSVP card:

A blank line for guests to write their names

On a formal RSVP card, you should write an "M" at the start of the line to indicate that guests should include their proper honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss) before their name. This guarantees that the host knows who is attending and how to correctly spell everyone's name on the seating chart. It is also helpful to have guests fill in the names of any plus-ones, dates, or children who will be attending.

A deadline for responses

It is important to give a clear deadline for responses, usually around three to four weeks before the wedding date. This gives the couple and their vendors enough time to finalise any last-minute details that depend on the guest count, such as food quantities and seating charts.

A way for guests to indicate whether they will attend

The primary purpose of an RSVP card is to learn who is coming to the wedding. This could be formatted as checkboxes, circling, or fill-in-the-blank lines. A simple "will attend" or "unable to attend" line will suffice, with guests filling in their response.

Food preferences and dietary requirements

If you are serving dinner at the wedding reception, you will want to collect your guests' food preferences and any dietary requirements or food allergies. You can indicate the meal type (buffet or plated dinner) and then use checkboxes or fill-in-the-blank lines for guests to detail their meal choices and any restrictions.

A special request line

You may also include a special request line on your RSVP cards. This could be for song requests, drink preferences, or a favourite memory of the couple. This adds a fun element to the RSVP process and makes it more enjoyable for the couple to receive the responses.

Additional information

Before sealing the envelopes, consider adding extra information such as your contact details and dress code. You can also include your wedding website URL to direct guests to more information.

A spreadsheet for organisation

Creating a spreadsheet to organise the RSVPs is a helpful tip. Number each RSVP card and subtly pencil the number on the back, so you know exactly who each response is from, especially if guests forget to write their names.

How to address wedding RSVP cards

Wedding RSVP cards are an important piece of your invitation suite. They are a great way to get your guests excited about your big day and to get an accurate headcount for your venue and caterers. Here are some tips on how to address wedding RSVP cards:

Include a Clear Deadline

It is important to give your guests a clear deadline for when to RSVP. This will help you stay organised and ensure that you have enough time to finalise the details with your vendors. The deadline is usually around four weeks before the wedding date, but if you are having a destination wedding, it is a good idea to set the deadline two months in advance to allow guests enough time to confirm travel plans.

Provide Different Ways to Respond

It is a good idea to provide your guests with different ways to respond, such as by mail, email, or through your wedding website. This will ensure that all your guests, regardless of their age or comfort with technology, can easily send their responses.

Match the Style of Your Wedding Invitations

The RSVP cards should follow the same style as your wedding invitations in terms of spelling, grammar, and stationery. This creates a cohesive look and feel for your wedding stationery suite.

Include the Essentials

The RSVP card should include the following essential information:

• A clear deadline for guests to respond
• A way for guests to indicate whether they will be attending or not
• Space for guests to write their names and the names of any plus-ones
• Information about dietary requirements and meal choices, if needed

Add a Creative Touch

You can add a creative touch to your RSVP cards by including a fun question or request, such as a song request or advice for the newlyweds. This will make your cards unique and engaging for your guests.

Create a Spreadsheet to Stay Organised

To stay organised, create a spreadsheet that corresponds to the numbers on the back of each RSVP card. This will help you keep track of responses, especially if a guest forgets to write their name or has illegible handwriting.

By following these tips, you can effectively address your wedding RSVP cards and gather the information you need to finalise the details of your special day.

How to fill out a wedding RSVP card

Filling out an RSVP card is pretty straightforward, but it's important to follow some basic rules of etiquette to ensure you're being respectful of the hosts and their planning process. Here's a step-by-step guide on how to fill out a wedding RSVP card:

• Check the envelope: Before responding, check the envelope to confirm who was invited to the wedding. If there is a "+1" or "+ guest", you are welcome to bring a guest. If your children are not listed on the envelope, assume it's an adults-only affair.
• Add names: Include the full names of those who are attending. If there is an "M" before the line, write your title (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss) followed by your name.
• Write the number of guests: In the accept or decline section, indicate the number of guests attending. If only one person was invited, you can use a checkmark or an X.
• Indicate food choices: If food options are provided, select your preference. If another guest is attending with you, use initials to indicate their choices.
• Include a personal note: Add a handwritten sentence or two of well-wishes or congratulations. This is a nice touch and shows your excitement for the event.
• Send on time: Respect the host's request and reply by the designated deadline. This allows them to finalise their guest list and make the necessary arrangements.
• Communicate delays: If you need extra time to decide or encounter unforeseen circumstances, inform the host promptly.
• Fill out all fields: Provide all the requested information, including names, number of guests, and any food preferences or dietary restrictions.
• Stick to the designated method of reply: Unless otherwise specified, use the provided RSVP card or requested method of reply. Avoid responding via text or social media, as it may cause confusion.
• Notify of changes: If you initially accept but later realise you can't attend, inform the host as soon as possible. This allows them to adjust their plans and invite someone else if needed.

Remember, your response is crucial for the hosts' planning process, so be sure to respond in a timely and respectful manner.

Frequently asked questions