Children At Weddings: To Invite Or Not?

Deciding whether or not to invite children to a wedding is a tricky question that every couple has to face. While some couples are happy to have young guests, others prefer an adults-only celebration. There are several factors to consider, such as the couple's budget, the potential for unpredictable child behaviour, and the desire to include all family members in the festivities. Some couples choose to compromise by inviting only specific children, such as those in the wedding party or those related to the couple. However, this approach can be tricky and may cause upset among guests. Ultimately, the decision comes down to personal preference, and it is important to clearly communicate the couple's decision to guests to avoid any confusion or hurt feelings.

Communicating your decision: Be clear about your expectations and inform guests about your decision early on

Deciding whether or not to invite children to your wedding is a tricky question, and one that will likely divide opinion. It's important to make your decision early on and to communicate it clearly to your guests. Here are some tips to help you navigate this sensitive topic:

Be Clear and Consistent

It is crucial that you are crystal clear about your expectations regarding children at your wedding. Decide on a single rule and apply it consistently across the board. This could be an all-out ban on children, inviting only specific children, or welcoming children of all ages. Communicate this decision clearly in your wedding invitations or on your wedding website. Avoid over-explaining your reasons, but be honest and firm in your delivery.

Provide Details on the Invitation

When addressing your wedding invitations, be explicit about who is invited. If both parents and children are invited, include the children's names on the invitation, either on the outer envelope or on an inner envelope if you're using one. If you are setting an age limit, specify any age restrictions clearly. This will help parents plan accordingly and avoid any confusion or hurt feelings.

Make Personal Calls

After sending out your invitations, consider giving your guests with children a quick call to explain your decision. This personal touch can help avoid any misunderstandings and show that you are considerate of their needs. It's also an opportunity to discuss childcare options and reassure parents that their children will be well taken care of if you are providing childcare services.

Tread Carefully with Exceptions

If you choose to make exceptions and invite only specific children, be prepared for potential pushback from guests who are not extended the same courtesy. It's generally considered impolite to invite some children while excluding others. If you must make exceptions, draw a clear line, such as inviting only immediate family or children who are part of the wedding party.

Plan Activities for Young Guests

If you decide to invite children, it's important to keep them entertained. Bored children can quickly become restless and disruptive. Provide activities such as games, puzzles, colouring sheets, or a separate kids' room with movies and snacks. You may also consider hiring a children's entertainer or providing a kid-friendly menu to keep your youngest guests happy.

Be Mindful of Your Guests' Needs

Remember that your guests may have different preferences and needs when it comes to childcare. Some parents may prefer to leave their children with familiar caretakers, while others may jump at the opportunity for a night out without the kids. Be accommodating and flexible where possible, and provide options for both scenarios.

In conclusion, when it comes to inviting children to your wedding, clear and early communication is key. Be considerate of your guests' needs, provide detailed information, and plan ahead to ensure that both the children and adults can enjoy your special day.

Inviting some children, but not others: It's generally considered impolite to invite some children and exclude others. If you do this, be prepared for pushback

Deciding whether or not to invite children to your wedding is a complex issue. While some people believe that all guests should be able to bring their children, accommodating families can be harder than expected. Children can be unpredictable, and you will need to rely on their parents to supervise them. You will also need to consider your budget; will you need to arrange dedicated childcare services?

If you decide to exclude children, you may upset some guests, especially those with young children. However, if you invite some children and not others, you are likely to cause even more offence. This is because you are creating different classes of guests: those who need to find childcare and those who do not. The only exception to this is if the children who are invited are part of the wedding party.

If you do decide to invite some children and not others, be prepared for pushback. Some parents may be angry or offended, especially if they have to find childcare. You may also receive some unexpected RSVPs, as some parents may bring their children regardless of whether they are invited.

To avoid this, it is best to choose a clear rule and stick to it. For example, you could only invite children who are part of the wedding party or immediate family members. Alternatively, you could set an age limit, such as only inviting children under a certain age.

Keeping children entertained: If you invite children, consider ways to keep them occupied, such as games, puzzles, or a separate kids' menu

If you're inviting children to your wedding, it's a good idea to plan some activities to keep them entertained. Here are some suggestions for games, puzzles, and kids' menus to make your wedding fun for your youngest guests:

Outdoor Games

• Lawn bowling
• Twister
• Outdoor Jenga
• Connect 4
• Skipping rope
• Hula hoops
• Hopscotch
• Sack race
• Badminton
• Sack race
• Giant tic-tac-toe
• Ring toss
• Badminton
• Croquet
• Boules
• Badminton
• Corn hole
• Ladder golf
• Spikeball

Indoor Games

• Board games (Monopoly, Guess Who, Operation, Hungry Hippos)
• Jigsaws
• I Spy
• Scavenger hunt
• Lego
• Video games (Just Dance, Rock Band, Guitar Hero)
• Wedding Shoe Game
• Wedding Guest Bingo
• The Kissing Game
• Stand Up, Sit Down
• Wedding Mad Libs
• Couple's Crossword
• Wedding Wheel
• Chalkboard games (tic-tac-toe, hangman)
• Cootie Catcher

Arts and Crafts

• Colouring competition
• Wedding-themed crafts (cake decorating, wedding dress designing, card-making)
• DIY masks for a photo booth
• Lego centrepieces

Kids' Menu Ideas

• Finger foods (carrots, celery, fruit kebabs, cheese and crackers)
• "Tray-passed" items
• Mini versions of traditional kids' foods (macaroni & cheese balls, mini cheeseburger sliders, mini grilled cheese)
• Caviar blinis
• Ahi tuna skewers
• Mocktails

Remember, keeping children entertained at a wedding doesn't have to be costly or complicated. With a bit of planning, you can create a fun and memorable experience for your youngest guests and their parents.

Seating arrangements: Decide whether to seat children with their families or at a separate table. Consider providing a playroom or supervised kids' area

Deciding on the seating arrangements for children at your wedding can be tricky, but there are a few options to consider. Here are some ideas to help you decide:

Seating Children with Their Families

If you have a small number of children attending your wedding, it is usually best to seat them with their families. This allows parents to keep an eye on their children and ensures that families can stay together during the celebration. This option may be especially important for families who have travelled a long distance to attend your wedding, as it gives them a chance to spend time together.

Separate Table for Children

If you have a large number of children attending, you may want to consider having a separate table for them. This can be a fun way to encourage the children to interact and make new friends. However, it is important to provide supervision for the children, such as a babysitter or nanny, to ensure they remain safe and well-behaved.

Kids' Area or Playroom

Another option is to create a designated kids' area or playroom, especially if you have a large number of children attending. This allows the children to have their own space to play and enjoy age-appropriate activities, such as crafts, games, and movies. Again, supervision is key to ensuring the children's safety and giving parents peace of mind.

Combining Options

You can also combine these options to suit your needs. For example, you could have a separate table for older children and a playroom for younger ones, or seat some children with their families while providing a play area for those who want to take a break from the adult festivities.

Remember, the most important thing is to communicate your plans clearly to the parents and ensure that you have their support and understanding. By providing a safe and enjoyable environment for children, you can help ensure that both the young and adult guests at your wedding have a memorable and fun experience.

Pros and cons of inviting children: Consider the potential benefits and drawbacks, such as added atmosphere vs. increased costs and unpredictability

Deciding whether or not to invite children to a wedding can be a difficult decision. Here are some pros and cons to consider when making this choice:

Pros of Inviting Children

• Added atmosphere: Children can add a huge amount of laughter, fun, and atmosphere to a wedding. They can also make for some fabulous photos and hilarious (and chaotic) memories.
• Family inclusion: You may want to include children who are close family members, such as nieces, nephews, or your own children, in your special day.
• Financial considerations for guests: Paying to attend a wedding and for childcare can be an expense some guests cannot afford. Allowing children may mean that certain guests will be able to attend.

Cons of Inviting Children

• Increased costs: Children can add to the guest count, which increases the budget for food and other expenses.
• Unpredictability: Children are unpredictable and may run around, scream, or cause chaos during the ceremony or reception. If you prefer a more refined atmosphere, it may be best to have an adults-only wedding.
• Guest enjoyment: Guests with children may have to tend to their needs, such as changing nappies or putting them to bed, which can impact their enjoyment of the wedding.
• Venue constraints: Some venues have limited capacity, and you may prefer to invite more adult guests instead of children. Other venues may not allow children or be suitable for hosting young guests.
• Destination weddings: Guests may not want to bring their children to a destination wedding, and you may not want children disrupting the child-free weekend for other guests.

Frequently asked questions