Envelope Etiquette: Including 'Plus Ones' On Wedding Invites

Wedding invitation envelopes can be a tricky task to navigate, especially when it comes to addressing guests and their plus-ones. The traditional approach includes an inner and outer envelope, with specific etiquette for each. The outer envelope is stamped and addressed formally, while the inner envelope is more casual and indicates the specific invitees. For single guests with a plus-one, it's best to know their guest's name, but if unsure, including & Guest or and guest is acceptable. For unmarried couples living together, both names are included, either on one or two lines. Same-sex couples follow the same format, ensuring suitable prefixes are used. Inner envelopes are optional but useful for clarifying plus-ones and children. While it's not necessary to handwrite addresses, it adds a thoughtful touch. Ultimately, the key is to be clear and considerate when addressing wedding invitation envelopes, ensuring your guests feel welcomed and well-informed.

Inner and outer envelopes

When sending out wedding invitations, it's important to follow certain etiquette rules to ensure your guests feel welcome on your big day. One of the most common questions that come up is how to address wedding invitations when it comes to including "and guest" on the invitation envelopes. Here are some guidelines and examples for addressing inner and outer envelopes:

The traditional way of addressing wedding invitations is to use both inner and outer envelopes. The outer envelope is typically more formal and includes the recipient's full name and personal title (Mr., Mrs., Ms., Miss, Mx., Dr., etc.). For couples, their names can be written on the same line if they have the same last name. If they have different last names, each name should be written on a separate line. For unmarried couples living together, their names should also be on separate lines without the word "and."

The inner envelope is more informal, and you have the option to leave out certain elements of the formal name format. You can use personal titles and last names or just first names, depending on your preference. For single guests with a plus-one, you can write "and Guest" on the inner envelope. If the guest is bringing a date, it is more personal to include that person's name on a separate line.

When inviting a family with children, the outer envelope should only include the parents' names, while the inner envelope lists each child's name below the parents'. Boys under the age of 13 can be referred to as "Master," while girls and young women under 18 can be called "Miss."

Example One: Married Couple with Same Last Name

Outer envelope: Mr. John and Mrs. Samantha Rivera

Inner envelope: Mr. and Mrs. Rivera

Example Two: Married Couple with Different Last Names

Outer envelope: Ms. Celine Elgin and Ms. Jacqueline Purcell

Inner envelope: Ms. Elgin and Ms. Purcell

Example Three: Unmarried Couple Living Together

Outer envelope: Mr. Aaron Triguiero

Mr. Gabriel Reyes

Inner envelope: Mr. Triguiero

Mr. Reyes

Example Four: Single Person with a Plus-One

Outer envelope: Mx. Sam Li

Inner envelope: Sam Li and Guest

In conclusion, when it comes to including "and guest" on wedding invitation envelopes, it is generally recommended to use the inner envelope for this purpose. This allows you to maintain a more formal tone on the outer envelope while providing clarity and flexibility for your guests on the inner envelope.

Married couples with the same last name

When addressing wedding invitation envelopes to married couples with the same last name, there are a few etiquette rules to follow. Firstly, it's essential to consider the couple's preferred pronouns and honour those in your addressing. Traditionally, the inner and outer envelopes follow different etiquette rules. The outer envelope is typically more formal, and you should write out the recipient's full name, including their personal title. For a heterosexual couple, use "Mr." for the husband and "Mrs." for the wife, followed by their shared last name. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren". If you know the wife has taken her husband's surname, you can address them as "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Thomas Warren".

However, many modern women may not like having their names left out or being addressed with their husband's name, so it is advisable to use both their names. On the inner envelope, you can use their first names or just their shared last name, for example, "Thomas and Michelle" or "Mr. Warren and Mrs. Warren".

If you are inviting a same-sex married couple with the same last name, either name can go first. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Samantha Johnson" on the outer envelope and "Mr. and Mrs. Johnson" or "Samantha and Thomas" on the inner envelope.

It's worth noting that personal titles can feel restrictive and exclusive, so you can choose to forgo them and use only first and last names. If you plan to include personal titles, always double-check each attendee's preferred title.

Married couples with different last names

When addressing wedding invitation envelopes to married couples with different last names, there are a few guidelines to follow. Firstly, the outer envelope should be more formal, with the recipient's full name and their personal title. If the wife has chosen to keep her maiden name, "Ms." can be used. The names should be written on the same line, with the woman's name first, followed by the man's name. If the combined names are too long to fit on one line, list them separately. Here's an example:

On the outer envelope: "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez"

For the inner envelope, you have more flexibility. You can use just the couple's titles and last names, or their first names. Here are some options:

On the inner envelope: "Ms. Stevens and Mr. Estevez" or "Maria and David"

If you are inviting a married couple where one person has a distinguished title, such as a doctor, military rank, or judge, the format is slightly different. The person with the distinguished title should be listed first, and their full title should be used. Here's an example:

On the outer envelope: "Doctor Tami Takata and Mr. David Estevez"

On the inner envelope: "Dr. Takata and Mr. Estevez" or "Tami and David"

It's important to note that these are just guidelines, and ultimately, you can choose how to address your wedding invitation envelopes based on your personal preference and the level of formality you want to convey.

Single guests with a plus one

When it comes to addressing wedding invitation envelopes, there are a few different scenarios to consider. Here are some tips and guidelines specifically for single guests with a plus one:

The Outer Envelope

The outer envelope is the one that is stamped and addressed, and it follows more formal etiquette rules. When addressing a single guest with a plus one on the outer envelope, use their personal title and full name, followed by "and Guest". For example:

> Mr. Tyler Morris and Guest

If you know the name of the guest's plus one, it is more personal to include their name instead of "Guest". You can write:

> Mr. Tyler Morris and Ms. Jane Smith

The Inner Envelope

The inner envelope is more informal and is placed inside the outer envelope, containing the invitation. For a single guest with a plus one, you can simply write their name, dropping the formal title. If you know the name of the plus one, include it after the invitee's name. Otherwise, you can just write "and Guest". Here are some examples:

> Tyler Morris and Guest

>

> Tyler Morris and Jane Smith

Other Considerations

If you are using both inner and outer envelopes, it is not necessary to include the plus one's name on the outer envelope. However, if you are only using one envelope (an outer envelope), all invited parties, including plus ones, should be listed.

It is also worth noting that including "and Guest" on the envelope is a clear indication that a plus one is invited. If a guest's name is listed alone, it means they are not offered a plus one.

Modern Alternatives

While the above guidelines are traditional, modern invitations may vary. For instance, you can choose to forgo personal titles and use only first and last names on the outer envelope. Additionally, if you are sending online invitations, be sure to address all invitees clearly, including plus ones.

Unmarried couples living together

When addressing wedding invitations to unmarried couples living together, there are a few things to keep in mind. Firstly, it is considered good etiquette to include both partners' names on the invitation, even if you are closer to one half of the couple. This is because unmarried couples living together are considered a social unit, and it would be impolite to refer to one partner as a "plus one" or a "guest". It is also important to use the correct titles and avoid abbreviations or nicknames.

For a more traditional approach, the outer envelope can be addressed with both partners' titles and full names, either on the same line or on separate lines. For example:

> Ms. Kara Porter and Mr. Ed Parsons

> Ms. Kara Porter

> Mr. Ed Parsons

If you want to go for a more contemporary style, you can simply use their first and last names:

> Kara Porter and Ed Parsons

When it comes to the inner envelope, you have more flexibility. You can use titles and last names, or just first names if you are very close with the couple. For example:

> Ms. Porter and Mr. Parsons

>

> Kara and Ed

If the couple has different last names, you can list the names alphabetically or with the person you are closest to first. It is also acceptable to write the woman's name first, especially if they have different last names.

If you are only using one envelope, simply combine the outer and inner envelope formats. Make sure to double-check the spelling of your guests' names and consider ordering extra envelopes in case of errors.

Frequently asked questions