Groomsmen And Wedding Invites: Who Gets An Invitation?

When it comes to wedding planning, one of the most important tasks for a groom is to choose his groomsmen. The groomsmen are typically the groom's closest friends and family members, and the role comes with a significant time and financial commitment. While there is no one right way to ask someone to be a groomsman, there are several creative and thoughtful approaches that can make the moment more meaningful and memorable. This could include sending a formal invitation, giving a gift, or simply having an in-person conversation. Regardless of the approach, it is important to give the groomsmen plenty of advance notice, usually 6-8 months, to allow them to budget and plan accordingly.

Groomsmen invitation wording ideas

Asking your friends to be your groomsmen is an important part of the wedding planning process. It can be a daunting task to find the right words to invite your friends to be a part of your special day. Here are some ideas to get you started:

• "To my greatest pal. Please be my groomsman. I can't think of anybody else to support me on my wedding day."
• "Time to suit up. Your service as a groomsman is requested at the wedding of [bride] and [groom]."
• "Bro, time to suit up. I'm getting hitched. I hope you'll take a shot at being my groomsman."
• "Will you be my groomsman? I can't say 'I do' without you by my side."
• "He can't do it alone. Join the groomsmen."
• "It's time to suit up. Please do me the honour of being my groomsman."

If you're looking for a more creative way to propose to your groomsmen, here are some unique ideas:

• Engrave their invitation on their favourite bottle of alcohol.
• Use a mail subscription service and include a formal invitation in the box.
• Give them a standard cigar or a sleek cigar case with an invitation inside.
• Get them a starter kit with essentials like cufflinks, a bow tie and a small bottle of their favourite drink.
• Send them directions to a nearby tailor or tuxedo service with a personal note attached.
• Go over the top and send them flowers with an official invite.
• Get them a bouquet of liquor with a mini bottle of their favourite spirits and a note asking them to be your groomsman.

Gifting groomsmen around the time of the wedding

Gifting your groomsmen is a thoughtful way to thank them for their presence and support on your big day. It is also a great way to pop the question: "Will you be my groomsman?"

Before the Wedding

When asking your chosen groomsmen to be a part of your wedding, it is customary to give them a small gift as a token of your appreciation and to commemorate the occasion. This could be something simple and affordable, like a personalised bottle opener, custom socks, engraved keychains, or a classy set of cufflinks. If you want to go the extra mile, you could even give them a gift that is related to your wedding, such as a monogrammed pair of cufflinks or a pocket square in your wedding colours.

During the Wedding

Gifts given to the groomsmen during the wedding are often more sophisticated and luxurious. Think personalised watches, premium decanter sets, custom duffle bags, or elegant leather accessories. These gifts not only show your gratitude but also reflect the special role that your groomsmen played on your big day.

After the Wedding

After the wedding, it is still customary to thank your groomsmen with a thoughtful gift. This could be something unique and personalised, like a custom-engraved money clip or a luxurious cigar holder. Alternatively, you could opt for something practical that they can use in their everyday lives, such as a sleek travel tumbler, a personalised cooler bag, or a stylish toiletry bag.

No matter what you choose, the most important thing is to let your groomsmen know how much you appreciate their presence and support during this exciting time in your life.

Gifting groomsmen at the time of asking them to be groomsmen

Gifts Related to Your Wedding

Monogrammed or personalised items such as cufflinks, a pocket square, a tie, a drink glass, a beer mug, or shot glasses are all great options. You can also gift them a cigar, a bow tie, a bottle opener, or a craft drink. These gifts can be accompanied by a note explaining that they will need it for your big day and asking them to be your groomsmen.

Gift Boxes

Themed groomsmen boxes can include items such as sunscreen, sunglasses, a nice pair of shades, a drink to hydrate with, a bow tie, a bottle opener, or a craft drink. You can also include some tissues for a good laugh or cry.

Accessories

Stylish and rewearable accessories such as cufflinks, watches, dress shoes, bow ties, ties, pocket squares, suspenders, socks, or cologne are all great options. You can even get them matching accessories, such as matching wristwatches and cufflinks.

Experience Gifts

If your groomsmen have a shared interest, you can gift them an experience such as tickets to see their favourite sports team or a camping trip.

Personalised Gifts

Personalised gifts such as custom golf balls, stylish proposal boxes, monogrammed handkerchiefs, engraved whiskey glasses, or custom dress socks are unique and memorable options.

Practical Gifts

Practical gifts such as trendy travel tumblers, wooden valet trays, engraved wooden watches, or insulated coffee mugs are useful and can be used long after the wedding.

Sentimental Gifts

Sentimental gifts such as a framed print from a favourite artist, a personalised moleskin journal, or a first edition of a favourite book will be cherished for years to come.

Fun Gifts

For a more lighthearted approach, you can send a funny personalised mug, a novelty tuxedo hoodie, or a best man fishing lure.

Remember, the key to choosing the right gift is to consider the interests and personalities of your groomsmen. Adding a personal touch, such as their name, initials, or a special message, will make the gift even more meaningful.

The right time to ask groomsmen to be in your wedding

The right time to ask your groomsmen to be in your wedding is about 8-10 months before the wedding. This gives your groomsmen enough time to plan and book your bachelor party, as well as make all the necessary arrangements, such as suit fittings. Asking your groomsmen to be in your wedding 6-8 months in advance is also considered reasonable, as it allows your groomsmen to budget and request time off from work.

However, it is important to consider the dynamics of your friendship circle and the potential changes that may occur over time. If you have a long engagement, it is advisable not to rush into a decision. Friendships can evolve, and your dream team may turn into a nightmare scenario before your wedding day arrives. Therefore, it is generally recommended to ask your groomsmen about a year before the wedding. This timeframe strikes a balance between providing sufficient planning time and accounting for potential shifts in relationships.

When deciding whom to ask, it is essential to choose individuals who have been a significant part of your life for a long time. Consider who has been there for you through the years and who you genuinely want by your side on your special day. Additionally, contemplate the responsibilities associated with being a groomsman and select individuals who you believe can handle these tasks effectively.

Once you've decided on your groomsmen, it's time to make the ask. While there is no one-size-fits-all approach, it is advisable to avoid a casual text or email. Instead, opt for a more personalised approach, such as a phone call or, even better, a face-to-face meeting. If distance is an issue, video calls or voice notes are also acceptable alternatives. Regardless of the method, ensure that your request is memorable and reflects your appreciation for their presence in your wedding.

Ways to ask groomsmen to be in your wedding

While there is no wrong way to ask your friends to be your groomsmen, it is important to be thoughtful and creative. Here are some fun and unique ways to pop the question:

Send a Formal Invitation:

Although it may seem obvious, a formal invitation is a great way to ask your groomsmen to be part of your special day. It allows you to express your thoughts and emotions clearly, and it gives your groomsmen a tangible keepsake.

Give a Thoughtful Gift:

A meaningful gift that you know your friend will appreciate is a fantastic way to ask them to be a groomsman. It could be something they are interested in, like sports memorabilia or a first-edition book, or something related to your wedding, like a monogrammed pair of cufflinks or a pocket square in your wedding colours.

Ask Them All Together:

If you have a large wedding party or find the idea of asking each person individually overwhelming, consider gathering all your prospective groomsmen for a fun activity or meal. You can then give a short speech about why they are important to you and ask them collectively to be your groomsmen. This approach fosters a sense of camaraderie among your groomsmen and sets a positive tone for future wedding-related events.

Send a Groomsman Gift Box:

A themed gift box is a fun and practical way to ask your groomsmen to join your wedding party. You can include items like cufflinks, a bow tie, a small bottle of their favourite drink, and other treats that tie into your wedding theme or location. For example, if you're having a beach wedding, include sunscreen and stylish shades.

Ask with a Cigar:

Cigar smoking has long been associated with celebrations, so presenting your groomsmen with a special cigar is a classic way to pop the question. You can secure the cigar to a piece of quality stationery or place it in an envelope with a letter. If possible, gather your groomsmen together and present the cigars as a group before enjoying a celebratory smoke.

Be Creative and Humorous:

If a formal approach isn't your style, feel free to be creative and humorous. You can send a funny card with a pun or inside joke, or go completely over the top by sending a bouquet of romantic red roses to each person with a dramatic note asking them to be part of your wedding party.

Give Them a Starter Kit:

Hint at your intentions by giving your prospective groomsmen a starter pack with wedding essentials like cufflinks, a tie, and a small bottle of their favourite drink. You can also include a unique gift box that matches their personality and interests.

Ask in Person or with a Call:

While it is not always possible to meet face-to-face, asking your groomsmen in person or over a video/phone call is more personal than a text or email. Take the time to share a meaningful moment or express your gratitude for their support.

Remember, when asking your groomsmen, it's important to be thoughtful and considerate. Whether you go for a grand gesture or a simple question, your friends will appreciate the effort and the honour of being included in your special day.

Frequently asked questions