Who Pays For Bridesmaids' Dresses In The Uk?

There are differing opinions on whether bridesmaids should pay for their own dresses in the UK. Traditionally, the bride or the couple pays for the bridesmaids' dresses, but it is becoming more common for bridesmaids to pay for their own. In the UK, the bride usually pays if she has a specific dress in mind, especially if it is expensive and unlikely to be worn again. If the bride is flexible, the bridesmaids can choose and pay for their own dresses. Bridesmaids may also pay if they have free rein over what they wear, or if the couple are on a tight budget. However, it is important to be open and honest with bridesmaids about costs from the beginning, and give them plenty of notice so they have time to save.

Who traditionally pays for bridesmaids' dresses in the UK?

In the UK, wedding traditions are changing, and it is becoming more common for bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses. However, traditionally, the bride or the couple pays for the bridesmaids' dresses, particularly if the bride has chosen a specific dress or type of dress.

According to wedding tradition, bridesmaids are expected to wear the same outfit, which complements the bride's dress. However, it is becoming more popular for each bridesmaid to wear a different dress, usually sticking to the theme or colour scheme of the wedding.

If the bride has chosen an expensive dress, it is generally expected that she will pay for it. It is also important to give bridesmaids plenty of notice if they are expected to pay for their own dresses, so that they have time to save.

In the UK, it is not common for the bride to ask her bridesmaids to pay for their dresses. If you are a bride on a budget, you could ask your bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses, but you should be sensitive to their financial situation and give them plenty of notice. You could also offer to pay half of the cost of the dresses or put a percentage towards the total cost.

Ultimately, it is up to the bride to decide whether or not to ask her bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses. If she does decide to ask them to pay, it is important to be flexible about the type of dress chosen and to allow the bridesmaids to have a say in what they will be wearing.

Should bridesmaids be allowed to choose their own dresses?

There are several factors to consider when deciding whether bridesmaids should be allowed to choose their own dresses. Here are some advantages and disadvantages to help inform your decision:

Advantages of Allowing Bridesmaids to Choose Their Own Dresses:

• Comfort: Choosing their own dresses allows bridesmaids to select styles, necklines, and cuts that flatter their individual figures, ensuring they feel comfortable and confident on the wedding day.
• Confidence: When bridesmaids feel good in their chosen attire, they will radiate confidence instead of discomfort, adding to the joy and celebration of the occasion.
• Cost: Allowing bridesmaids to pick their own dresses can alleviate financial strain by accommodating different budgets and reducing the need to spend money on expensive dresses that may only be worn once.
• Individual Expression: Giving bridesmaids the freedom to choose their own dresses allows them to express their unique style and personality, making them feel valued and appreciated.
• Time-saving: In some cases, letting bridesmaids choose their own dresses can save time, especially for weddings with a short time frame. Off-the-rack options or non-traditional bridesmaid dresses may be more readily available than made-to-order boutique dresses.

Disadvantages of Allowing Bridesmaids to Choose Their Own Dresses:

• Lack of Cohesion: Allowing bridesmaids to choose their own dresses may result in a lack of visual cohesion in the wedding party. Mismatched styles, colours, and textures might detract from the desired aesthetic and make it challenging to identify the bridal party in photos.
• Confusion and Stress: Providing too much freedom without clear guidelines can lead to confusion and additional stress for both the bride and the bridesmaids. They may struggle to find dresses that meet the bride's expectations, especially if they have to coordinate remotely.
• Extra Work for Bridesmaids: Selecting their own dresses can add to the responsibilities of the bridesmaids, particularly the maid of honour, who already have numerous tasks and duties to fulfil.
• Group Shopping Challenges: While group shopping trips can be fun and foster bonding among the bridal party, they may not be feasible for various reasons, such as geographical distances or conflicting schedules.
• Mismatched Final Look: Achieving a perfectly matched look can be challenging when bridesmaids choose their own dresses. Slight variations in colour, fabric, and style can be more noticeable than expected, especially in photographs.

Ultimately, the decision should consider the preferences and circumstances of the bride and the bridal party. Clear and open communication is essential to ensuring everyone is on the same page and avoiding any misunderstandings or disappointments.

What if the bridesmaids can't afford the dress?

If a bridesmaid can't afford the dress, the bride and her partner should step in to help cover the cost and work that expense into their wedding budget, if possible. This should be done privately so that the other bridesmaids don't feel slighted. The bride should also pick the bridesmaid dresses as early as possible so that each bridesmaid will have the maximum amount of time to save up for the gown. It's also worth checking if the store selling the gowns offers a payment plan.

If the dress still isn't a feasible option, the bride could consider shopping for a similar look that costs much less. "While you wouldn’t want to sacrifice style, there are a lot of great, affordable bridesmaid dress options out there, so it’s worth looking," says Gabriella Risatti, the founder of Gabriella New York Bridal Salon.

Alternatively, opting for mismatched bridesmaid dresses opens up a whole new world of options. If the bridesmaids are each selecting different gowns within the same colour scheme, it's also likely to be easier to find a pretty, flattering style that doesn't break the bank. "You get to be more flexible," says Diane Gottsman, a national etiquette expert and author. "Or, someone might already have one hanging in their closet that fits the bill perfectly."

If all options have been exhausted and you're still at an impasse, the bridesmaid may need to take on a different role within the wedding. She could give a reading at the ceremony or help greet guests, notes Risatti, which will make her feel involved without having to splurge on a pricey dress.

What other costs might bridesmaids incur?

Being a bridesmaid comes with several costs attached. Here is a list of costs that a bridesmaid might incur:

Travel and accommodation

Travel and accommodation to and from the wedding is usually paid for by the bridesmaid. This can be a costly expense, especially if the wedding is in a far-flung location.

Hen party

The hen party is another expense for the bridesmaid. This can be a significant cost, especially if it is a multi-day event or involves travel. It is common for the cost of the hen party to be split between everyone attending, except the person getting married.

Wedding day essentials

Bridesmaids are also responsible for bringing their own wedding day essentials and must-haves for getting ready.

Wedding gift

Despite the other costs incurred, traditional wedding etiquette indicates that it is customary for bridesmaids to give a wedding gift. If money is tight, it is acceptable to get something small from the couple's registry or to pool funds with other bridesmaids to purchase a group gift.

Hair and makeup

Hair and makeup are another grey area. If the bride wants the bridesmaids to have their hair and makeup done professionally, it is customary for her to cover the cost as a gift. However, if the bride doesn't mind either way, the responsibility falls to the bridesmaids.

Bridal shower

The bridal shower is usually planned and paid for by the maid of honour and other bridesmaids. This can be an additional expense on top of the other costs incurred by the bridesmaids.

Accessories

Bridesmaids are usually expected to cover the cost of their own accessories, such as shoes, jewellery, and bags. However, if the bride insists on everyone having matching accessories, she should be prepared to pay for them.

Dress alterations

Dress alterations are another grey area. If the bridesmaid needs alterations to ensure the dress fits correctly, it is a nice gesture for the couple to pay. However, if the bridesmaid wants to change the style or add something to the dress, she should offer to pay for the alterations.

Pre-wedding event attire

With the popularity of themed events leading up to the wedding, bridesmaids might need to purchase new outfits or accessories, which can add to the overall cost of being a bridesmaid.

How much do bridesmaids' dresses cost?

The cost of a bridesmaid dress varies depending on the location, the type of dress, and the financial situation of the bride and her bridesmaids.

In the UK, it is traditional for the bride or the couple to pay for the bridesmaids' dresses, especially if the bride has chosen a specific dress or type of dress. However, in some cases, bridesmaids may be expected to pay for their own dresses, particularly if the bride is flexible about the style and allows them to choose their own. In these situations, it is important to have an open and honest discussion about finances to avoid any misunderstandings or tension.

According to a survey by Oasis, the average price of a bridesmaid dress in the UK is £114, with 44% of brides spending between £51 and £100, and 20% spending over £150. However, this can vary depending on the number of bridesmaids and the specific requirements of the bride. For example, designer dresses can range from £180-250, while high street options may be available for as little as £65 or even less in a sale.

In the US, it is customary for bridesmaids to pay for their own dresses, regardless of the bride's preferences. This can be a significant expense, especially when factoring in additional costs such as accessories, alterations, and professional hair and makeup services.

To save money on bridesmaid dresses, brides can consider the following options:

• Have fewer bridesmaids to reduce the number of dresses needed.
• Shop in end-of-season sales or look for second-hand dresses online.
• Choose mismatched dresses within a specific colour palette or style, allowing bridesmaids to pick their own budget-friendly options.
• Offer to pay the difference or cover alteration costs if a particular dress is desired but out of budget.

Frequently asked questions