Wedding Guest List: Family Children Only

Deciding whether to invite children to your wedding is a tricky question that divides opinion. Some people believe that kids add a certain magic to the atmosphere, while others feel that children can be a distraction and prefer adults-only weddings. If you're wondering whether you can invite only children of family to your wedding, the answer is yes, but there are some considerations to keep in mind.

Firstly, it's important to be consistent and clear in your approach. While you can make exceptions for children of immediate family, it's generally considered impolite to invite some children while excluding others. Be prepared for some guests to be unhappy with your decision, especially if they have to make childcare arrangements. To avoid confusion, clearly state your policy on wedding invitations or your wedding website, and consider calling guests with children to explain your decision.

If you do invite children, it's a good idea to provide entertainment and a separate kids' menu. You may also need to consider seating arrangements and whether to hire a babysitter.

Communicating your decision: Be direct and honest, over-communicate your wishes, and address invitations properly

When communicating your decision to have an adults-only wedding, it's important to be direct and honest with your guests. It's your wedding, so don't be afraid to set the rules and let your loved ones know your wishes. Here are some tips to effectively communicate your decision:

• Address your wedding invitations properly: On the outer envelope, write only the names of the adult guests you are inviting. If you are using both an outer and inner envelope, include the names of the invited children beneath their parents' names on the inner envelope. This makes it clear who is invited.
• Be explicit: If you want to be very clear, you can include a note on the invitation or a separate reception card that says "Adults-Only Reception" or "Our wedding is adult-only, thank you."
• Use your wedding website: Create a wedding website and include an adults-only announcement on it. This reinforces your message and ensures that guests have no confusion about your wishes.
• Over-communicate: Don't be afraid to over-communicate your wishes. If needed, follow up with a phone call to your guests with children to explain that your wedding is adults-only. This is especially helpful if you are worried about guests bringing their children against your wishes.
• Set a clear rule: If you choose to invite some children, such as those from immediate family, set a clear rule and stick to it. This avoids any appearance of favouritism and helps to prevent hurt feelings.
• Be considerate: Remember that some parents may need to make special arrangements if their children are not invited. A thoughtful gesture would be to provide information about local babysitting services or childcare providers.

Remember, it's your special day, so don't be afraid to set the rules and communicate them effectively to your guests.

Inviting some children but not others: It's generally considered rude to be selective about which children are invited. If you do go down this route, make a clear rule and stick to it

Deciding whether or not to invite children to your wedding is a tricky task, and it's even more challenging to decide whether to invite some children but not others. It's generally considered rude to be selective about which children are invited, but if you do decide to go down this route, it's important to establish a clear rule and stick to it.

One option is to draw the line at immediate family, as most children who have wedding duties, such as flower girls or ring bearers, are usually close relatives. You could also set an age limit, as older children are more likely to be well-behaved. However, be aware that the more children you invite, the more their behaviour will change. A couple of well-behaved children may not be a problem, but a large group of children could end up being disruptive.

If you're inviting children from different families, it's important to be consistent and apply the same rule to all guests. For example, you could invite only the children of immediate family members or only children who are part of the wedding party. It's also important to be clear in your communication with guests about who is and isn't invited. This can be done through proper addressing of envelopes, a separate page on your wedding website, or a phone call to clarify.

Remember that some guests may not take the news well if they can't bring their children, especially if they have to make last-minute childcare arrangements. It's also important to consider the impact on your budget, as children may require dedicated childcare services and special menus. Ultimately, the decision is yours, and you should do what feels right for you and your partner.

Adults-only wording: Avoid implying that parents can't have fun with their children present. A simple we're sorry we can't accommodate children will do

Planning a wedding can be stressful, especially when it comes to navigating the guest list. If you're opting for an adults-only wedding, it's important to communicate this clearly and politely to your guests. Here are some suggestions for wording your invitations to ensure your special day is child-free:

Keep It Short and Sweet:

A concise and straightforward approach can be effective. Try phrases such as:

• "With respect, we would like our special day to be an adult-only occasion."
• "Regrettably, children are unable to attend."
• "Please note, this will be an adults-only celebration."
• "We are sorry that we are unable to accommodate children."

Blame It on the Venue:

If you'd rather shift the focus away from your personal preference, you can use the venue as a reason:

• “We are very sorry, but due to restrictions at our venue, we cannot accommodate children."
• “Our venue has a strict no-under-18s policy, so we are unable to welcome children to the wedding."
• “Due to limited space, we are unable to extend this invitation to children."

Be Honest About Budget Constraints:

If budget is a factor, it's perfectly acceptable to mention it:

• “We regret that due to budget limitations, we are unable to extend this invitation to children."
• “As much as we would love to invite all the children, our budget only accommodates adult guests."
• “Due to budget constraints, we kindly request the company of adults only."

Make It Light-Hearted and Fun:

Add a touch of humour to your invitation with these playful phrases:

• "Call the sitter, this party is just for grown-ups!"
• "Kids are fun, yes they are, but no-one likes them by the bar. Adults-only please!"
• "We love your kids, but thought you might like a night off. Dust off those dancing shoes!"

Be Clear but Compassionate:

It's important to set the expectation of an adults-only event while also being considerate:

• "We respectfully request no children at our wedding celebrations. We hope you understand and can still join us."
• "Although we adore your children, we regretfully cannot accommodate them. We hope you'll celebrate with us and let your hair down!"
• "To allow all guests to relax and enjoy themselves, we've chosen to make our special day adults-only. We appreciate your understanding."

Remember, it's your wedding, and you are entitled to decide who is on the guest list. Choose the wording that feels most comfortable for you, and don't be afraid to set clear boundaries.

Childcare: If you're inviting children, consider providing childcare or a separate kids' room

It is completely understandable if you want to have a child-free wedding or only invite the children of family members. Including children can bring a lot of joy to your special day, but it also requires careful consideration and planning to ensure that both the children and their parents have a positive experience. One way to do this is by providing childcare or setting up a separate kids' room.

• Hire professional babysitters or nannies: Depending on the number of children attending, you can hire one or more babysitters or nannies to look after the kids during the wedding. Look for caregivers with experience in handling groups of children and who are certified in first aid and CPR. They can keep the kids entertained with games, crafts, and activities, ensuring that their parents can relax and enjoy the celebration knowing their little ones are safe and having fun.
• Set up a designated kids' room: Create a separate space just for the invited children, transforming it into a mini playground or entertainment hub. Stock the room with age-appropriate toys, games, books, and art supplies. You could also set up a movie corner with bean bags and a projector, or gaming consoles for older kids. Snacks and drinks can be provided, and if your venue allows, an outdoor play area can be a great addition. It is a good idea to have a dedicated staff member or volunteer supervise this room to ensure the children's safety and keep things running smoothly.
• Provide activity packs: Prepare goodie bags filled with activities tailored to different age groups. These can include coloring books, small puzzles, stickers, bubbles, and other inexpensive toys. The packs can be placed at each child's seat to keep them occupied during the ceremony and reception.
• Organize kid-friendly food options: Discuss with your caterer to provide a child-friendly menu or buffet with familiar and tasty options. Include items like mini pizzas, chicken nuggets, fruit cups, and fun desserts. If there are any children with specific dietary restrictions or allergies, be sure to accommodate their needs as well.
• Plan some family-friendly activities: Include some activities that can be enjoyed by both children and adults. This could be a photo booth with fun props, a karaoke session, a scavenger hunt, or outdoor games like a three-legged race or a gentle game of catch. These activities can help create lasting memories for families and keep the little ones engaged.

By providing childcare or a separate kids' room, you can ensure that the children invited to your wedding have a wonderful time, and their parents can celebrate knowing their children are safe and well cared for. It adds a thoughtful touch to your special day and can make a significant difference in the overall experience for families.

Children's menu: It's recommended to have a child-friendly menu with options like chicken fingers, mac 'n' cheese, or sliders

Deciding whether to invite children to your wedding can be tricky. There are many factors to consider, such as the number of children, the venue capacity, and the potential for hurt feelings among guests. Some couples choose to have an adults-only wedding, while others invite only children who are in the wedding party or who are close family members. Ultimately, it is up to the couple to decide what is best for them and to communicate their decision clearly to their guests.

Now, if you are inviting children to your wedding, it is recommended to have a child-friendly menu with options that will appeal to young guests. Here are some ideas to consider:

• Finger foods: These can include fried mac and cheese lollipops, flatbread and cheese bites, bite-sized meatballs, mini grilled cheese sandwiches, small fruit or veggie skewers, mini sandwiches, veggie spring rolls or wraps, and chicken and waffles bites.
• Packaged snacks and individualized platters: This option is great for accommodating allergies and food restrictions.
• Low-sugar, low-mess dessert options: Offer bite-sized cookies, macarons, chocolate-covered strawberries, mini cupcakes, cotton candy, or marshmallow bites.
• Kid-friendly drinks: Provide reusable cups with secure caps and straws, filled with fruit juices, water, or sodas.
• Elegant presentation: Use the same fancy plates, flatware, and napkins as the adult tables to make the kids feel special.
• Chicken fingers, mac 'n' cheese, or sliders: These classic kid-friendly options are always a safe bet and can be made to look elegant.
• Fruit, finger foods, and a make-your-own-sundae bar: These options provide a healthy and interactive dining experience for kids.
• Crudités: A plate of veggies with dip can be a healthy and tasty option for kids.
• Mocktails: Offer fancy non-alcoholic drinks, such as kombucha, with creative garnishes like edible flowers or dehydrated citrus.

Remember to communicate any special dietary needs to your caterer and consider providing a separate kids' table or room with supervised activities to keep the little ones entertained during the reception.

Frequently asked questions