The Benefits Of Byob Weddings And What To Consider

Planning a wedding can be a stressful task, especially when it comes to budgeting. One of the most significant expenses is often the cost of alcohol, leading some couples to consider a BYOB wedding. While this can be a controversial topic, with some people believing it is “tacky” or cheap, others argue that it is a practical way to save money and ensure guests can enjoy their preferred drinks. Ultimately, the decision comes down to personal preference and what the couple feels comfortable with, as there is no one-size-fits-all approach to wedding planning.

Pros and cons of BYOB weddings

The decision to have a BYOB wedding is a highly contested topic. Some people believe that BYOB weddings are tacky and inappropriate, while others believe that they are a great way to save money and offer guests a wider variety of drinks. Ultimately, the decision is up to the couple and should be based on their own preferences and what they think will work best for their guests. Here are some pros and cons to consider when making this decision:

Pros:

• Cost savings: This is perhaps the greatest advantage of a BYOB wedding. Alcohol can be expensive, and by having a BYOB wedding, couples can save thousands of dollars. According to The Knot, the average amount spent on alcohol for weddings with over 100 guests is over $3,000.
• Personal preferences: With a BYOB wedding, guests can choose their desired drinks. When purchasing alcohol through a venue, options may be limited.
• Less planning: Planning the alcohol for a wedding can be challenging, as it is difficult to predict how much people will drink and what types of drinks they will prefer. A BYOB wedding eliminates these hassles, allowing couples to focus their energy on other aspects of the wedding.
• Logistics: If the wedding is held at a house or backyard, there will likely be fewer logistical challenges regarding alcohol.

Cons:

• Guest expectations: Some guests may expect an open bar at a wedding and may be disappointed or upset if they are asked to bring their own drinks.
• Perceived as tacky: Some people may view BYOB weddings as rude or inappropriate, especially in more formal settings. There may be a perception that the couple is trying to save money or is being cheap.
• Lack of control: Without a bartender, there may be no one to monitor alcohol consumption, which could lead to excessive drinking or drunk guests.
• Legal and liability concerns: There may be local and state liquor laws to consider, and the couple may need to obtain special event licenses or insurance to serve alcohol.
• Inconvenience for guests: Some guests may find it inconvenient or impractical to bring their own drinks, especially if they are travelling from out of town.
• Venue restrictions: Not all venues will allow BYOB, and there may be alcohol regulations that need to be followed.

Ultimately, the decision to have a BYOB wedding depends on the couple's preferences, budget, and what they think will work best for their guests. It is important to consider the potential advantages and disadvantages and make a decision that aligns with their values and priorities.

Venues for BYOB weddings

If you're looking to bring your own alcohol to your wedding, you may have to do some extra research to find a venue that can accommodate your needs. Here are some tips and venue ideas for a successful BYOB wedding:

• Online Search: Start by searching for BYOB-friendly venues in your desired region. Some venues will include information on their websites about their alcohol regulations, making it easier to narrow down your options.
• Contact the Event Coordinator: If you have your heart set on a particular venue that doesn't advertise itself as BYOB-friendly, reach out to their event coordinator or manager to ask about their alcohol policies. They can provide clarity on what is and isn't allowed, and you may be able to negotiate a deal.
• Backyard Wedding: Consider hosting your wedding at a house or backyard. This option typically comes with fewer logistical challenges regarding alcohol, and you'll have more freedom to serve it in a variety of ways. Just be sure to check if you need permission from local authorities first.
• Peerspace: Peerspace, the online marketplace for venue rentals, offers a wide range of BYOB-friendly venues across the globe, including gardens, conservatories, barns, and galleries. Prices vary, but you can find beautiful venues like a Spanish-style home in Joshua Tree, CA, for $250 per hour, or a flower farm near Dallas, TX, for $150 per hour.
• Other Suggestions: Some specific venue suggestions from real couples include Bridgewater Place, Black Barn Winery, Masonic Temple, Century Club in Muskegon, and Wabasis Lake Park shelterhouse.

While finding a BYOB wedding venue may require some extra legwork, it can be a great way to save money and offer your guests a wider variety of beverage options. Don't be afraid to ask venues about their policies and get creative with your search!

How to communicate BYOB to guests

There are several ways to communicate BYOB instructions to your wedding guests. Here are some suggestions:

Wedding Invitations

You can include a BYOB request on your invitation, but it is essential to be smart about the wording to avoid coming across as impolite or gift-grabby. Be straight and clear, and consider incorporating some humour. For example, you could write, "We will be providing sodas, lemonade, iced tea and beer. Please feel free to bring your favourite booze and dancing shoes!" If you prefer a more formal style, you might say, "Limited bar available." This hints at bringing their drinks without explicitly stating it.

Wedding Website

Your wedding website is another avenue to convey BYOB details. You can provide all the relevant information about what is expected from your guests regarding drinks. Be sure to include your wedding website link on your invitation card.

Save-the-Dates

Save-the-dates are typically sent out 8-12 months before the wedding for destination weddings or 4-8 months in advance for local events. They are an opportunity to provide initial details and allow guests to plan their attendance and travel arrangements.

Email

Email is a direct way to communicate with your guests, especially those who prefer receiving wedding-related updates via this method. You can send invitations to pre-wedding events, transportation information, and scheduling updates.

Social Media Private Groups

Creating a private Facebook group for your wedding guests can facilitate communication, provide reminders, answer questions, and share photos. However, this approach only works if a large percentage of your guests use Facebook frequently.

Text Messaging

Text messaging is ideal for quick updates, reminders, and answering questions, especially for individuals or small groups, like your wedding party. It is also useful during the wedding weekend when you may not be checking email or social media.

Phone Calls

Phone calls are best for dealing with tricky situations or older guests who may not use modern communication methods. It is a more direct way to convey important wedding details and handle any potential drama.

Other Considerations

Before finalising your BYOB plans, ensure your wedding venue allows it. Some venues have restrictions on food and drinks from outside sources. Also, be mindful that some guests may not love the BYOB concept, finding it impolite or informal for a wedding. Additionally, consider the potential for guests to overindulge without a bartender to control the crowd and cut off over-drinkers. Finally, get wedding liability insurance to protect against alcohol-related incidents during your reception.

Legal considerations for BYOB weddings

If you're planning a bring-your-own-booze (BYOB) wedding, there are a few legal considerations to keep in mind. Firstly, it's important to check with your local and state liquor laws to ensure you comply with all BYOB policies. These regulations can vary depending on your location, so be sure to research the specific rules for your area.

Another important consideration is wedding liability insurance. This type of insurance can protect you and your spouse-to-be against alcohol-related incidents during the reception. It's a good idea to get this insurance beforehand so that you have peace of mind on your big day.

In addition to legal and insurance considerations, it's crucial to choose a venue that can legally and logistically accommodate a BYOB event. Some venues may not allow outside food and drinks, so it's important to check with the event coordinator or manager before making any decisions. If your desired venue doesn't allow BYOB, you may want to consider hosting the wedding at a house or backyard, as there are often fewer restrictions for at-home receptions. However, even for at-home weddings, some cities may require you to obtain special permission.

When planning a BYOB wedding, it's also a good idea to think about how you will handle guests who overindulge. You may want to consider providing transportation to prevent guests from driving under the influence or having a designated area for guests who need a place to sober up.

Lastly, while not a legal requirement, it's essential to communicate your BYOB plans to your guests in advance. This can be done through your wedding website, invitations, or by word of mouth. This way, your guests will know what to expect and can come prepared.

Alternatives to BYOB weddings

If you're looking for alternatives to a BYOB wedding, there are several options to consider. Here are some suggestions:

• Provide your own alcohol: If you don't want to burden your guests with bringing their own drinks, you can supply the alcohol yourself. This can be more cost-effective than an open bar, as you can purchase alcohol from a separate vendor or bring your own cases of wine, beer, and champagne. Many retailers allow you to return unopened cases. This option gives you more control over the quantity and type of alcohol served.
• Opt for a dry wedding: If providing alcohol doesn't align with your values or budget, you can choose to have a dry wedding. Communicate this clearly to your guests beforehand so they know what to expect. This option eliminates the hassle of managing alcohol and allows you to focus on other aspects of your celebration.
• Host a cash bar: Instead of a BYOB wedding, you could have a cash bar where guests can purchase their own drinks. This option ensures that guests who want alcohol can obtain it, while also managing your costs. It's a compromise that allows guests the freedom to choose while maintaining a more formal setting.
• Offer a limited selection: Rather than a full open bar, you can provide a limited selection of drinks. For example, you could offer beer, wine, and/or a signature cocktail. This reduces costs while still providing hospitality to your guests.
• Choose an alternative wedding style: If a traditional wedding with a reception isn't your style, you could consider alternatives such as an adventure elopement, a destination elopement and honeymoon, a small backyard wedding, a city hall elopement, or a micro-wedding at a private home rental. These options offer unique and intimate ways to celebrate your marriage without the pressure of hosting a large, traditional wedding.

Remember, the most important thing is to make choices that align with your values, budget, and vision for your special day. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, so feel free to get creative and make it a celebration that truly reflects who you are as a couple.

Frequently asked questions