Boys As Bridesmaids: Unconventional But Why Not?

The terms bridesmaid and groomsman are rooted in old traditions with gendered associations. However, modern weddings are becoming more inclusive, and there are no hard and fast rules that dictate the gender composition of a wedding party. It is becoming increasingly common for brides to have male bridesmaids, often referred to as bridesmen or men of honour, standing by their side on their wedding day. Ultimately, it is the couple's decision to choose their wedding party, and gender should not be a limiting factor.

Boys can be bridesmaids, but should they wear a dress or a suit?

When it comes to weddings, the most important thing is that the couple's closest friends and family are there to support them. In modern times, there are no rules saying that the wedding party must be separated by gender. It is becoming increasingly common for brides to have a male bridesmaid, often referred to as a 'bridesman' or 'man of honour', and for grooms to have a female groomsman, or 'groomsmaid'.

If you are a bride considering having a male bridesmaid, it is important to think about what they should wear. There are a few options to consider:

• The same outfit as the groomsmen: This is a simple option, and the bridesman can stand out by wearing a different tie, vest, or boutonniere.
• A matching tie, bow tie, or pocket square: This is a great way to coordinate with the bridesmaids' dresses without being too matchy.
• A suit in a matching colour: For example, if the bridesmaids are wearing pink, the bridesman could wear a pink suit, or a suit with pink accents.
• A mix-and-match style: Choose a wedding colour palette and pick clothing for everyone that coordinates.

Ultimately, the decision is up to the couple and their wedding party. The most important thing is that everyone feels comfortable and looks like they are part of the group. It is also worth noting that a male bridesmaid does not have to wear a dress, and it may be more appropriate for them to wear a suit or other masculine attire.

In the end, the decision of what to wear should be made by the couple and their wedding party, taking into account everyone's comfort and style preferences. The key is to ensure that everyone feels included and valued on the special day.

What are the duties of a male bridesmaid?

While there is no rulebook for the responsibilities of a male bridesmaid, also known as a "bridesman", there are several duties that are expected of them. Here is a detailed list of duties for a male bridesmaid to fulfil before, during, and after the wedding:

Pre-Wedding Duties:

• Support the bride emotionally: As one of the bride's closest friends, the male bridesmaid should provide emotional support to the bride throughout the entire wedding planning process. This may involve helping to mediate family drama, bridal party conflict, or calming any jitters the bride may have.
• Attend pre-wedding events: The male bridesmaid should attend all pre-wedding events, including the bridal shower, bachelorette party, engagement party, and any other gatherings.
• Book travel and accommodations: It is the responsibility of the male bridesmaid to take care of their own transportation and lodging for the wedding and any other events.
• Attend the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner: The male bridesmaid should be present at the ceremony rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner. This is important not only for practical reasons but also to provide support to the bride during the final moments of preparation.
• Help with wedding planning tasks: While not a wedding coordinator, the male bridesmaid can lend a hand with certain smaller tasks, such as stuffing envelopes, alphabetising escort cards, easy DIY projects, or accompanying the bride to appointments.
• Buy a wedding gift: The male bridesmaid is expected to purchase a wedding gift for the couple from their wedding registry, unless it is a destination wedding, in which case their presence may be considered gift enough.

Wedding Day Duties:

• Get ready with the bridal party: The male bridesmaid should plan to arrive on time at the designated location for getting ready, with all their necessary items. They should assist the bride in any way needed, such as answering calls or texts, ensuring she eats and stays hydrated, and helping her with her dress, shoes, jewellery, or veil.
• Provide snacks and drinks: If no other arrangements have been made, the male bridesmaid should take the initiative to provide snacks and drinks for the bridal party and anyone else who may appreciate them, such as the photographer or stylists.
• Be the bride's right-hand: Throughout the day, the male bridesmaid should be the bride's go-to person, assisting with any tasks and being her emotional support.
• Participate in the ceremony: The male bridesmaid should be on time and in place for the ceremony, keeping chatter to a minimum and following the rehearsed plan. After the ceremony, they should stick around for group photos.
• Be a model guest: The male bridesmaid should mingle with guests, enjoy the food and drinks, sit at their assigned table, sign the guest book, and participate in other guest activities.
• Maintain a stress-free send-off: The male bridesmaid should assist with packing up any items that need to be transported out of the venue, such as decorations, gifts, cards, and the bride's belongings. They can also help ensure guests find their way out and the couple's overnight bags make it to their wedding night hotel room.

Post-Wedding Duties:

• Attend post-wedding events: The male bridesmaid should attend any post-wedding events, such as a farewell party or a post-wedding brunch.
• Organise leftover items: The male bridesmaid can help to return any miscellaneous items or rentals to the vendor and ensure that all gifts, cards, and personal belongings make it back to the couple.
• Settle outstanding payments: The male bridesmaid should take care of any remaining expenses that need to be split among the bridal party as soon as possible after the wedding.

Additionally, the male bridesmaid may be asked to give a speech at the wedding reception, expressing their well wishes for the couple and touching on their relationship with the bride. They can also offer a unique male perspective on certain decisions, such as gifts for the groom, suit styles for the groomsmen, or drink selections.

What are the benefits of having a male bridesmaid?

There are many benefits to having a male bridesmaid, or "bridesman". Firstly, it is a great way to include your closest friends and family members in your wedding, regardless of their gender. If your best friend or a family member is male, there is no reason why they shouldn't stand beside you on your big day.

A male bridesmaid can also offer a different perspective and provide advice on what the men at the wedding might like, such as gifts for the groomsmen, styles of suits, and drinks. He can also act as a messenger between the bridesmaids and groomsmen and be an extra pair of hands for heavy lifting.

In terms of pre-wedding events, a male bridesmaid can be included in the bridal shower and bachelorette party, or you could opt for a joint co-ed celebration. This ensures your bridesman feels included and gives the whole bridal party a chance to mix and mingle before the wedding.

On the day of the wedding, a male bridesmaid can be there to help you get in and out of the car, assist with your dress, and keep your glass of champagne topped up. He can also dance with you and interact with the other guests to get the party started.

When it comes to attire, a male bridesmaid can either wear the same suit as the groomsmen with an accessory that matches the bridesmaids' colour palette, or a suit that blends in with the bridal party colour scheme. Accessories such as ties, bow ties, pocket squares, or boutonnieres are a fun way to coordinate with the bridesmaids' dresses.

Ultimately, the decision to have a male bridesmaid is a personal one, and there are no rules that need to be followed. If you want to include a male friend or family member in your bridal party, go for it!

What should a male bridesmaid be called?

There are several options for what to call a male bridesmaid. The most common terms are "bridesman" and "man of honor", but there are other alternatives that can be used. Here are some ideas:

• Bridesman: This term simply refers to a male bridesmaid and is one of the most widely recognised and accepted titles for a male member of the bridal party.
• Man of Honor: Similar to a "maid of honor", this title denotes that the person is the head of the bridal party and has a place of honour next to the bride.
• Bride's Attendant or Bride's Person: These terms are more gender-neutral alternatives to "bridesmaid" and can be used to refer to any member of the bridal party supporting the bride.
• Bro of Honor: A playful take on the traditional "maid of honor", this title is a fun way to honour the male bridesmaid's role and relationship to the bride.
• Brides-Bro: Another light-hearted option, this title emphasises the brotherly bond between the male bridesmaid and the bride.
• Bridesmate: This term is a combination of "bridesmaid" and "mate", offering a more gender-inclusive option while still retaining the core meaning of the role.
• Groomswoman: While less common, this term can be used to indicate a female member of the groom's party, similar to a "groomsman".
• Groomsman: While traditionally associated with the groom's party, there is no rule that a male friend or family member of the bride cannot be included in her bridal party, and thus the title of "groomsman" can still apply.
• Honour Attendant: This title is a more general term that can be used for any member of the wedding party who is not a bridesmaid or groomsman, regardless of gender.
• Creative Titles: Ultimately, there are no rules, and you can get creative with a title that is unique to your friendship. Something playful, like "Beardsmaid" or "Brides-Dude", can add a fun and personal touch to the wedding party.

It is worth noting that the responsibilities and duties of a male bridesmaid are largely the same as those of a female bridesmaid. They can be expected to assist with planning, attend parties and events, provide emotional support, and stand by the bride's side on the wedding day. When it comes to attire, male bridesmaids can either match the groomsmen or complement the bridesmaids' dresses with coordinating accessories.

What should a male bridesmaid wear to complement the bridesmaids' dresses?

Having a male bridesmaid is becoming more common, and it's a great way to include your closest male friends in your wedding. When it comes to dressing your male bridesmaid, the key is to complement the bridesmaids' dresses and ensure that everyone feels comfortable and confident. Here are some ideas to help you plan his outfit:

Matching the Groomsmen

One option is to have your male bridesmaid match the attire of the groomsmen. He can wear the same suit, but to make him stand out, you can give him a unique tie, vest, or boutonniere that complements the bridesmaids' dresses. This could be in the same colour or a similar shade. This option creates a cohesive look for the wedding party while still allowing your male bridesmaid to stand out as part of your bridal party.

Coordinating Colours

If you want your male bridesmaid to stand out more, you can coordinate his outfit colours with the bridesmaids' dresses. For example, if your bridesmaids are wearing pink, he could wear a pink tie, pocket square, or even a pink suit. This adds a fun and unique touch to your bridal party's palette.

Accessories

Accessories are a great way to tie your male bridesmaid's look together with the bridesmaids' dresses. You can match his tie, bow tie, or pocket square to the colour of the bridesmaids' dresses. If you want to add more accessories, a flower crown or a boutonniere that matches the bridesmaids' bouquets can be a fun addition.

Mix and Match

If you prefer a mix-and-match style, you can choose a wedding colour palette and select clothing for your bridal party that coordinates within that palette. This gives you flexibility while still creating a cohesive look.

Remember, there are no rules when it comes to your wedding. You can be creative and choose an option that feels right for you and your bridal party. The most important thing is that your male bridesmaid feels comfortable and confident standing by your side on your special day.

Frequently asked questions