Weddings: An Open Affair For All To Attend

A wedding ceremony is a significant event that marks the union of two people in marriage. While the specific rituals and traditions may vary across different cultures and religions, the fundamental purpose remains the same – to celebrate the love and commitment between a couple. In a typical wedding ceremony, there are several key moments that unfold, from the processional, where the wedding party and couple make their entrance, to the exchange of vows and rings, which serve as a symbolic declaration of their love and commitment. The officiant, who may be a religious figure or a legally ordained individual, plays a crucial role in guiding the ceremony and ensuring the legal requirements of marriage are met. Ultimately, the wedding ceremony is a celebration of love, joy, and the beginning of a new chapter for the couple, shared with their loved ones.

Who walks down the aisle and when?

The wedding processional order can vary depending on religious and cultural traditions, as well as personal preferences. Here is a general outline of who walks down the aisle and when, based on different types of wedding ceremonies:

Christian Wedding Processional Order:

• Officiant (optional)
• Groom (either entering from the side or walking down the aisle)
• Groomsmen
• Groom's parents
• Mother of the bride, escorted by a family member or groomsman
• Bridesmaids and groomsmen, either walking in pairs or individually
• Maid/Matron of Honor
• Flower girl(s) and/or ring bearer(s)
• Bride and her father, or another chosen escort

Jewish Wedding Processional Order:

• Rabbi and/or Cantor
• Grandparents of the bride, seated on the right side
• Grandparents of the groom, seated on the left side
• Groomsmen, walking in pairs
• Best man
• Groom, escorted by his parents
• Bridesmaids, walking in pairs
• Maid/Matron of Honor
• Ring bearer(s) and/or flower girl(s)
• Bride, escorted by both parents

Hindu Wedding Processional Order:

• Groom, accompanied by family and friends, often on a white horse or another grand entrance
• Bride's family to welcome the groom
• Bride, escorted by male family members such as brothers or uncles
• Bride's parents and the priest join the couple under the mandap (wedding altar) to begin the ceremony

Nondenominational Wedding Processional Order:

• Officiant
• Groom and groomsmen (optional)
• Groom's parents (optional)
• Bride's parents (optional)
• Groomsmen and bridesmaids, typically walking in pairs
• Maid/Matron of Honor
• Flower girl(s) and/or ring bearer(s)
• Bride, escorted by her father, mother, both parents, or no escort

While these are general outlines, the specific order and participants may vary based on personal preferences and family dynamics. Ultimately, the couple can create their own processional order to suit their unique needs and wishes.

What is said during the opening remarks?

The opening remarks of a wedding ceremony are often delivered by the officiant, who will say a few words of welcome and thank the guests for bearing witness to the union. The officiant may also share a brief recounting of the couple's love story, or speak about what marriage means to the couple.

> Dear friends and family of the Bride and Groom, we welcome and thank you for being part of this important occasion. We are gathered together on this day to witness and celebrate the marriage of [Name Of Bride] and [Name Of Groom]. Every one of us has a deep desire to love and be loved. Your marriage today is a public and legal affirmation of the bonding that you had already begun. Marriage is a commitment that will allow you to share your lives together. Marriage will stretch you as individuals, deepen your love for one another and bring out the best in each other. So, enjoy your marriage and let it be a time of waking each morning and falling in love with each other all over again.

> Today is a day to celebrate. We are celebrating the love, commitment, and friendship of two people who love each other and wish to spend the rest of their lives together. The marriage ceremony is a significant part of nearly every culture, religion, generation, and society. Despite all of our differences, we all share love. Love is the great unifier, regardless of who we are, where we’ve come from, or what we believe in. We can all describe love in many ways, and love can look different from one person to another, but we all know love when we see it. And we can see love right here.

> Dear family and friends, we have gathered here together to witness [Name Of Bride] and [Name Of Groom], as they exchange their vows of marriage. We rejoice with them in their delight in finding love with each other, and support their decision to commit themselves to a lifelong relationship. Marriage is like an umbrella that covers and protects love. As 1 Corinthians 13 says, we learn that love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful; it is not irritable or resentful, nor arrogant or rude. Love does not seek self, nor does it rejoice in the wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears and believes in all things. Love hopes in all things, endures all things, and love has no end.

> Good afternoon, everyone. Are you ready for an event years in the making? Let me hear you, now! Are you ready for [Name of Bride] and [Name of Groom] to finally get married?

> We have been invited here today to witness and celebrate with [Name of Groom] and [Name of Bride] a very important moment in their lives. In the years they have been together, their love and understanding of each other have grown and matured, and now with love and commitment, they have decided to live their lives together as husband and wife. No other human ties are more tender, and no other vows are more important than those you are about to take. Both of you come to this day with the realization that the bond of marriage is sacred, as are all of its obligations and responsibilities.

> Friends and family, welcome. We are gathered together to celebrate the very special love between [Name of Bride] and [Name of Groom], by joining them in marriage. All of us need and desire to love and be loved, and one of the highest forms of love between two people is expressed on the day they become one in marriage. Thank you for sharing your love with this beautiful couple on this special day.

> [Name of Groom] and [Name of Bride], today marks the public and legal union of the love that has long resided in your hearts. Marriage provides a new space for you to share your lives, standing united to confront life’s challenges hand in hand. It will enrich you as individuals, shape your identity as a couple, and nurture a deeper bond of love between you. Success in marriage requires strength, courage, patience, and a healthy dose of humour. May your marriage be a journey of waking up each morning and rediscovering your love for each other anew.

What readings or poems are included?

Wedding readings and poems are a great way to express your love for your partner as you tie the knot in front of friends and family. They can be poignant passages from literature, poetry, film, or songs that have spoken to you over the years and have served to clarify what love, marriage, and commitment mean.

From Literature:

• "From Beginning to End" by Robert Fulghum
• "Captain Corelli's Mandolin" by Louis De Bernieres
• "One Hundred Years of Solitude" by Gabriel García Márquez
• "Jasper Jones" by Craig Silvey
• "Jane Eyre" by Charlotte Brontë
• "The Nightingale" by Kristin Hannah
• "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" by J.K. Rowling
• "Daisy Jones & the Six" by Taylor Jenkins Reid
• "A Farewell to Arms" by Ernest Hemingway
• "The Mistress of Rome" by Kate Quinn

From Poetry:

• "Love Sonnet 17" by Pablo Neruda
• "Untitled" by R.M. Drake
• "The Art of Marriage" by Wilferd A. Peterson
• "Always" by Lang Leav
• "How Do I Love Thee" by Elizabeth Barrett Browning
• "Love's Philosophy" by Percy Bysshe Shelley
• "Untitled" by Christina Rossetti
• "Buried Light" by Beau Taplin
• "Sonnet 116" by William Shakespeare
• "She Walks in Beauty" by Lord Byron
• "A Wedding Toast" by James Bertolino
• "Our Souls Are Mirrors" by Rupi Kaur
• "Sonnet 116" by William Shakespeare
• "Having a Coke With You" by Frank O'Hara (Excerpt)
• "Love Song" by Rainer Maria Rilke
• "Slow Me Down, Lord!" by Wilferd A. Peterson
• "In One Another’s Souls" by Rumi
• "This Is Just to Say" by William Carlos Williams
• "New Beginnings" by Barbara Crooker
• "Now Touch the Air Softly" by William Jay Smith
• "In Your Light I Learn How to Love" by Rumi
• "I Saw Two Clouds at Morning" by John G. C. Brainard
• "Touched By an Angel" by Maya Angelou
• "I Carry Your Heart With Me" by E.E. Cummings
• "The Gift" by Pam Brown
• "At Nightfall" by Charles Hanson Towne
• "It Was Said With Such Authority" by Gary E. McCormick
• "Devoted" by Lori Eberhai
• "The Privileged Lovers" by Rumi
• "How Do I Love Thee?" by Elizabeth Barrett Browning
• "Variation on the Word Sleep" by Margaret Atwood
• "To Love Is Not to Possess" by James Kavanaugh
• "The Earth Turned to Bring Us Closer" by Eugenio Montejo
• "Chemistry" by Nayyirah Waheed
• "Defeated by Love" by Rumi
• "Desire" by Alice Walker
• "The Day Sky" by Hafiz
• "Stardust" by Lang Leav
• "Children Running Through" by Rumi
• "The Wedding Vow" by Sharon Olds
• "Every Day You Play" by Pablo Neruda
• "Plant so that your own heart will grow (author unknown)
• "The Ache of Marriage" by Denise Levertov
• "Love Is a Place" by E. E. Cummings
• "We" by Nayyirah Waheed
• "A Great Need" by Hafiz
• "Somewhere I Have Never Travelled, Gladly Beyond" by E. E. Cummings

From Film and Television:

• "When Harry Met Sally"
• "The Wedding Singer"
• "Grey's Anatomy"
• "The Vow"
• "Sleepless in Seattle"
• "Grey's Anatomy"
• "The Vow"
• "Grey's Anatomy"
• "This Is Us"

From Song Lyrics:

• "Mirrors" by Justin Timberlake
• "I Choose You" by Sara Bareilles
• "There Will Be Time" by Mumford and Sons, featuring Baaba Maal
• "The Book of Love" by Stephin Merritt, featuring The Magnetic Fields

From Children's Books:

• "Winnie the Pooh" by A. A. Milne
• "The Velveteen Rabbit" by Margery Williams
• "The Little Prince" by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
• "Tell Me" by Shel Silverstein

From Humorists:

• "Love Me When I’m Old" by Bee Rawlinson
• "Yes, I'll Marry You My Dear" by Pam Ayres

From Religious Works:

• "A Blessing for The Journey (Buddhist Prayer)" by Sensei Wendy Egyoku Nakao
• "Love Is All-Pervading" by Shantanand Saraswati
• "1 Corinthians 12:31-13:8"
• "The Buddha’s Sermon at Rajagaha, Verses 19-22"
• "Song of Solomon 2:10-13; 8:6,7"
• "Ruth 1:16-17"

What is the order of the vow exchange and ring ceremony?

The order of the vow exchange and ring ceremony varies depending on the type of wedding ceremony. However, in most cases, the vows are exchanged first, followed by the ring exchange.

Traditional Wedding Ceremony Order

According to wedding planner Victoria Miller, a traditional wedding ceremony typically begins with a welcome or introduction by the minister. This is followed by the exchange of vows, with the couple reciting their own vows or using traditional phrasing. After the vows, the couple exchanges rings, sealing their marriage with a kiss. The minister then announces them as a married couple for the first time.

Jewish Wedding Ceremony Order

In a Jewish wedding ceremony, the couple recites their vows under a chuppah, a four-poled canopy that represents the creation of a new Jewish home. After the vows, the groom gives a ring to the bride, and the ketubah, a marriage contract, is read aloud. The seven blessings are then chanted over the couple, followed by the breaking of the glass, which symbolises the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem.

Hindu Wedding Ceremony Order

Hindu weddings often include a garland exchange, where the bride and groom exchange beautiful flower garlands as a symbol of welcoming each other into their families. The priest then begins the ceremony with prayers in Sanskrit and lights a sacred fire. The couple takes seven steps together around the fire, symbolising the most important step in a Hindu marriage. After this ritual, they are officially married.

Catholic Wedding Ceremony Order

In a Catholic wedding ceremony, the priest begins with rites and a prayer, followed by readings from the Bible. The couple then exchanges vows, using the traditional Catholic vows with no embellishments or personalisation allowed. The priest blesses the wedding rings, and the couple exchanges rings, reciting a version of, "Take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit."

Nondenominational Wedding Ceremony Order

Nondenominational wedding ceremonies offer more flexibility and customisation. Couples may choose to include a unifying ritual, such as lighting a unity candle or performing a handfasting ritual. They exchange personalised vows and rings, followed by a kiss to seal their marriage.

Order of Vow Exchange and Ring Ceremony

While the specific order may vary, the vow exchange and ring ceremony are significant components of the wedding ceremony. The vows represent the promises of love and devotion made by the couple, while the ring exchange symbolises their commitment and unity. The specific wording chosen for the vows and ring exchange can be tailored to reflect the couple's personality and style.

What happens during the recessional?

The wedding recessional is the order in which the newlywed couple and wedding party exit the ceremony. It is a significant moment as it marks the couple's first steps as newlyweds and symbolises the beginning of their journey together.

The recessional usually follows the reverse order of the processional. The newlyweds lead the way back down the aisle, followed by the flower girl and ring bearer, the maid of honour and best man, and then the bridesmaids and groomsmen. If there is an even number of bridesmaids and groomsmen, they can walk in pairs. If not, they can go solo. For balance and symmetry, they should follow the pairing type they entered the ceremony with. The parents of the couple may follow, but this is not necessary.

The wedding recessional is entirely customisable. Couples can choose to have the families and wedding party depart in the opposite lineup of the processional. The officiant is usually the last member of the wedding party to leave the ceremony.

The recessional is generally accompanied by an upbeat piece of music, often a song that is meaningful to the couple. It is usually fairly long to give everyone time to exit the ceremony space.

Frequently asked questions