Bachelorette Parties: Who Should Be Invited?

Bachelorette parties are a pre-wedding tradition that is usually planned by the maid of honour, but can be organised by anyone. The guest list typically includes the bridal party, minus any junior bridesmaids, sisters, and close friends. While bridesmaids are not required to attend, they often do and sometimes host the event. It is considered good etiquette for the host to discuss finances with attendees beforehand, as everyone usually pays their own way, with the hostess covering the cost for the bride.

Should bridesmaids who don't attend pay for the bride's food and drink?

Bachelorette parties are usually planned by the maid of honour, but anyone can take on the role. The guest list typically includes the wedding party, sisters, and close friends of the bride. While it is customary for bridesmaids to attend the bachelorette party, it is not mandatory. Life happens, and sometimes people cannot be everywhere at once or participate due to a lack of resources.

Now, when it comes to the question of whether bridesmaids who don't attend should pay for the bride's food and drink, the answer is a bit nuanced. If the bachelorette party is local and includes a night on the town, it is customary for the bridesmaids and other invited guests to pay for their share of the bill, plus the bride's expenses, such as dinner, drinks, and other activities. However, for destination bachelorette parties that require significant travel and accommodation expenses, the expectation shifts. In these cases, the bridesmaids and guests typically pay for their own costs and are not expected to cover the bride's expenses as well.

Ultimately, the decision on how to handle finances for a bachelorette party should be discussed and agreed upon by the group. It is important to be mindful of everyone's financial situation and communicate clearly to ensure that everyone is comfortable with the plan.

If a bridesmaid cannot attend the bachelorette party, they are not obligated to contribute financially. However, if they can afford it and want to show their support, they may choose to contribute in some way, such as paying for a special dinner for the bride or sending a gift.

Who should be invited to the bachelorette party?

When it comes to bachelorette parties, the guest list should include the wedding party, sisters, and close girlfriends. The future sister-in-law may also be included if the bride wishes to bond with her. It is not mandatory to invite all the bridesmaids, but it is customary to extend the invitation to all of them.

The maid of honor typically takes the lead in organizing the bachelorette party, but as a bridesmaid, you should be prepared to support her efforts. This includes helping with the planning, preparation, and financial aspects of the event.

It is important to note that not all bridesmaids may be able to attend due to various reasons, such as financial constraints or work commitments. In such cases, it is not expected or required for them to contribute financially to the event.

The bachelorette party is a time for the bride to bond with her closest friends and family, and it is important to ensure that the guest list reflects this. It is also crucial to keep the bride's preferences and personality in mind when planning the event, whether it be a wild night out or a relaxing weekend getaway.

What should you gift the bride-to-be?

Bachelorette parties are a fun and exciting way to celebrate the bride-to-be before her wedding day. While it's not mandatory to bring a gift for the occasion, it's a thoughtful way to shower the bride with extra love and attention. Here are some ideas for what you could gift the bride-to-be at her bachelorette party:

Small tokens or sentimental items

Small, thoughtful gifts are a great way to go, especially if you're on a budget. Consider something that the bride can use at the event, like a customised bottle of her favourite beverage, a ""Mrs" sun hat for a tropical-themed party, or a film camera to capture all the memories. You could also give her a gift that's just for her, like a pair of earrings with her future last name initial or a bridal clutch for the bachelorette party and wedding day.

Lingerie

Lingerie is a popular bachelorette party gift and can be enjoyed by both the bride and her partner after the event. You could go for a cheeky option or something more classy and comfortable, like a babydoll made with delicate chevron lace and ultra-soft cotton. For an extra special touch, consider a luxury lingerie subscription service that curates designer underwear according to the bride's taste.

Relaxing self-care treats

If the bride has a busy bachelorette night ahead, a soothing self-care kit could be a perfect gift. Look for something with eye masks, lip masks, a quartz roller, and rose spray to help her relax and rejuvenate. You could also go for a gift card for a massage or a blow-out, or a nice bottle of massage and bath oil.

Fun games and books

For a light-hearted gift, consider a conversational card game or a fun book to spice things up in the bedroom. These can be a great way to break the ice and bond with the other guests at the bachelorette party.

Practical travel accessories

If the bachelorette party involves travelling, you could gift the bride some practical yet stylish travel accessories. A light blue vegan leather jewellery case, for example, will keep her precious jewellery safe and tangle-free. Or, for a destination celebration, a personalised luggage tag will add a touch of practicality and style to her travels.

Remember, bachelorette party gifts are not required and can be as extravagant or simple as you like. The most important thing is to celebrate the bride-to-be and create lasting memories with her.

Should there be a dress code?

Bachelorette parties are a chance for the bride to let loose and have fun with her bridal party and closest friends before the wedding. While there's no strict dress code, there are some unspoken rules and stylistic choices that are common for these pre-wedding celebrations.

It's not mandatory, but many bachelorette parties do have a dress code, and it's becoming an increasingly popular way to personalize the event and make it more fun. The host or bride may decide on a theme, such as a specific colour palette, or ask guests to wear matching outfits or accessories. For example, guests could be asked to wear their favourite shade of green, or to sport matching t-shirts, sashes, or headbands.

If you're the host, it's a good idea to consult with the bride on the dress code, and to consider the location and activities of the party. For instance, a poolside party in Miami calls for a trendy sarong, while wine tasting in Napa Valley might be better suited to a chic nap dress. A bachelorette party in Nashville could be the perfect opportunity for guests to don cowgirl boots and fringe denim jackets, while a party in Las Vegas might call for sequined bodycon dresses.

It's also important to be mindful of guests' limitations. Not everyone will be able to afford an elaborate costume, so it's a good idea to suggest a general dress code guideline, such as "beachy" or "Grecian-inspired" attire, rather than a specific outfit. If you're a guest and you have concerns about the dress code, feel free to discuss it with the host.

The bride usually has free rein when it comes to her bachelorette party outfit, but there are a few style tips that are worth considering:

• Think beyond white: While it's customary for brides to wear white during pre-wedding events, it's not mandatory. The bride can opt for a unique, vibrant colour or a little black dress, with her bridesmaids wearing contrasting all-white outfits.
• Avoid expensive clothing: Bachelorette parties can be lively, so it's best to avoid pricey outfits that could get damaged. Instead, shift the focus to experiences and creating lasting memories.
• Lean into fun and flirty styles: This is a celebratory time, so the bride might want to opt for fun and flirty styles like sequined dresses, sleek jumpsuits, or statement mini dresses.
• Dress for the location and activities: The bride should touch base with the host to find out about the location and activities planned, so she can choose an appropriate outfit. For example, a mountain yoga session calls for athleisure, while a poolside party might require a trendy sarong or swimsuit.
• Consider how it photographs: The bride will likely be the focus of many photos and social media posts, so choosing an outfit that makes her feel confident and happy is key.

• Avoid wearing white: Unless instructed otherwise by the host, guests should avoid wearing white to any wedding-related events, as this is usually reserved for the bride.
• Match your fellow guests: If the host has provided matching t-shirts or other merchandise, be sure to pack it to avoid being the only guest without it.
• Follow the dress code: If the host has planned a specific dress code or theme, such as an all-neon outfit or a themed costume, be sure to pack accordingly.
• Dress for the location and activities: Guests should also consider the location and activities when choosing their outfits. For example, a beach destination might require a swimsuit and a flowy maxi dress, while a morning hike or yoga session calls for a tennis dress or a matching set.
• Always keep it classy: While it's a pre-wedding celebration, it's still a wedding-related event, so guests should avoid wearing skimpy or revealing outfits that might make the bride or older family members uncomfortable.

Ultimately, the most important thing is for everyone to feel comfortable and have fun celebrating the bride-to-be!

Who pays for what?

Bachelorette parties are notorious for being expensive. While it is all in good fun, the costs can be challenging for bridesmaids to keep up with. The average cost of a bachelorette party is about $1,000 per person for a three-night stay, excluding flights.

The rule of who pays for the bachelorette party depends on the location. For local parties, bridesmaids and any other invited guests are expected to pay for their share of the bill, plus the bride's expenses, like dinner, drinks, and other activities.

For destination bachelorette parties, the host and guests usually pay for their own costs, but not the bride's. The bride will typically cover her airfare and her share of the lodging. Sometimes, she'll even chip in to help alleviate the financial burden on her guests. The bride may even purchase gifts for the attendees to show her gratitude.

The maid of honour, who typically plans the pre-wedding event, will take care of stocking the bride's hotel room with supplies and decorations. The bridesmaids and any invited friends and family might also decide to treat the bride to dinner and drinks one night, but the bride is expected to cover the rest of her meals on the trip.

For any expenses incurred on the trip, like meals and rideshares, it's best to track and then split them equally among the party guests after the trip. Each bridesmaid pays for their own individual expenses, such as transportation costs, accommodation, food, drinks, and their portion of group activities. They are also responsible for pitching in to cover the bride's expenses.

The maid of honour pays for all of her own expenses, including transportation costs, accommodations, food, drinks, and her portion of the group activities. She also traditionally chips in to pay for the bride's expenses, split evenly with the rest of the bridesmaids. However, this depends on what the bride feels comfortable with—she may insist on paying her own way. As the maid of honour, you can expect to front some of the costs for group meals and activities while waiting for the other attendees to pay you back.

How to Deal with Bachelorette Party Finances

The responsibility of setting, managing, and tracking the budget falls on the person planning the bachelorette party (usually the maid of honour). Before making any decisions, it's essential to have a conversation about the budget with everyone on the guest list. Since each individual will be contributing a significant sum, everyone should feel comfortable with the final amount. It's recommended to ask each person individually to get an honest sense of everyone's budget.

After considering everyone's responses, a budget that accommodates each person's request and financial status should be set. It's important to share the decided price point with the group so that everyone has realistic expectations and can decide whether they can attend. Transparency from the beginning of the planning process is key.

Once the budget is approved by the group, the planner can start booking accommodations, planning activities, and making reservations within the budget. It's helpful to share pricing information for each item so that everyone can start budgeting.

The planner is in charge of making the payments and can use a credit card to secure reservations. They can then be reimbursed by the group through apps like Venmo or Splitwise. It's recommended to pay for as many events and activities in advance to save yourself a headache.

For any costs that aren't covered ahead of time, the group can decide how to pay. For example, the bridesmaids might split the bill during mealtimes, or one person can put down their card if the group is too big.

To ensure accurate reimbursement, it's essential to keep track of every expense. Save all receipts and make a spreadsheet to input each bill.

Frequently asked questions