Smash Cake: Wedding Fun Or A Messy Affair?

Smashing cake in your partner's face at your wedding is a tradition that has evolved over the centuries. In ancient Rome, brides were expected to end the wedding festivities by having a barley cake smashed on their heads as a symbol of male dominance. Today, the tradition is often seen as a playful moment during the reception, with couples taking handfuls of cake to each other's faces. While some people find it funny, others consider it disrespectful and a waste of food and money.

The tradition's history and evolution

The Traditions, History, and Evolution

The tradition of smashing cake in one's face at weddings, also known as the "cake smash", is a custom that has evolved over time. While the exact origins are unclear, some sources suggest that it may have started in ancient Rome, where barley cakes were crumbled over the bride's head for good luck. This evolved into the throwing of crumbs and later, rice. Another similar tradition involved the bride throwing a slice of cake over her head to symbolise starting the marriage without the temptation of desire.

However, the modern cake smash is believed to be a playful offshoot of the tradition of the bride and groom feeding each other cake as a symbol of trust. In this version, the couple takes handfuls of their wedding cake and smashes it into each other's faces, sometimes gently and sometimes aggressively. This practice has become increasingly popular, especially on social media platforms like TikTok.

Despite its popularity, the cake smash has been criticised as disrespectful, messy, and wasteful. Some experts suggest that it may even be a symbol of mistrust or a display of dominance and control by the groom. The tradition can also ruin clothing, hair, and makeup, and cause injuries like bloody noses. As a result, many couples are opting out of the cake smash altogether, choosing instead to feed each other cake without the smash or opting for alternative traditions.

Whether it's disrespectful

Smashing cake in your partner's face during your wedding ceremony is a lighthearted tradition for some, but for others, it is disrespectful, messy, and a waste of food and money.

The tradition of smashing cake, or the 'cake smash', is thought to have originated in ancient Rome, where a barley cake was crumbled over the bride's head to symbolise male dominance and encourage fertility. In modern times, the tradition has evolved to include both partners and is often considered a playful moment during the reception. However, some people view the tradition as disrespectful, particularly when it is done without the consent of one or both partners. Dr Becky Spelman, for instance, suggests that a nonconsensual wedding cake smash could indicate issues related to control, disrespect, or disregard for boundaries.

The cake smash has also been criticised for being wasteful, messy, and a potential health and safety hazard. Wedding attire, hair, and makeup can be ruined by the cake, and there is a risk of injury, as seen in a viral video where a bride caused her groom's nose to bleed. The tradition can also be costly, with wedding cakes ranging in price from $1.50 to $12 per slice, according to The Knot.

Some couples choose to forego the cake smash altogether, opting instead for a more gentle feeding of cake to one another, which is seen as a symbol of trust and commitment. Others recommend alternatives such as a subtle frosting on the nose or a small amount of whipped cream, which is easier to remove and can still create a romantic moment.

While the cake smash can be a fun and playful addition to a wedding reception, it is important to consider the potential downsides and respect the wishes of both partners involved.

The potential for injury

Smashing cake into your new spouse's face at your wedding might seem like a harmless tradition, but it can actually be quite dangerous. There are several ways in which people can be injured during this activity. Firstly, there is the risk of eye injury. If the cake is a tiered cake, it is likely to have wooden or metal dowels supporting the structure. These dowels are sharp and can cause serious harm if someone's face is pushed into them. In one instance, a woman almost lost her eye when her friends smashed her face into a birthday cake, and there have been other similar incidents reported online.

Another potential injury from the cake-smashing tradition is a bloody nose. This can occur when one person gets too aggressive and shoves the cake into their partner's face with excessive force. In some cases, the entire cake may fall over, creating a mess and potentially causing further accidents.

The cake-smashing tradition can also lead to wasted food and ruined clothes, hair, and makeup. It can be a messy affair, leaving participants sticky and uncomfortable for the rest of the night. Not to mention, it can be a health and safety hazard, especially if the cake contains inedible decorations.

While some people may find the tradition funny and playful, it is important to be aware of the potential risks involved. Couples considering this activity at their wedding should communicate beforehand and ensure they are both comfortable with it. There are also alternative ways to incorporate cake into the celebration, such as gently feeding each other cake or applying a small amount of frosting to the nose. These options can still create romantic and playful moments without the risk of injury or mess.

The cost of the cake

The cost of the wedding cake is a significant factor to consider when planning a wedding, and it can be a costly affair. The average cost of a wedding cake in the United States is around $500, with most couples spending between $300 and $700. However, the price can vary depending on the size, style, and complexity of the cake. Elaborate cakes with multiple tiers, intricate designs, sugar flowers, and unique shapes tend to be more expensive, while simpler cakes with classic buttercream icing and a few fresh flowers are more affordable.

The type of frosting also impacts the cost, with fondant-covered cakes typically starting at $5 per slice and buttercream cakes at $4 per slice. Couples may also incur additional costs for cake stands, toppers, and cutting utensils, as well as delivery and setup fees. It is worth noting that some bakers include these supplies and services in their base price, while others charge extra.

To save money on the wedding cake, couples can opt for a smaller, simpler cake and supplement it with a less expensive sheet cake to ensure enough servings for all guests. Using fresh flowers instead of sugar flowers can also reduce costs without sacrificing aesthetics.

In addition to the cake itself, there are other dessert options to consider. About 54% of couples choose to serve alternative desserts such as cupcakes, cake pops, or pies, which can add to the overall cost of the wedding cake and dessert experience.

When planning a wedding, it is essential to factor in the cost of the cake and any additional expenses associated with it. By considering the size, style, and add-ons, couples can make informed decisions and stay within their budget.

Alternatives to the tradition

The tradition of smashing cake in your partner's face at weddings has been called outdated, disrespectful, and a waste of food and money by many wedding and etiquette experts. The tradition has also been criticised for its sexist origins, symbolising male dominance and the promise of fertility.

• Feeding each other cake without the smash, symbolising a moment of trust between the newlyweds.
• Subtly placing frosting on the nose or a small amount of whipped cream, which is easy to remove and can be a romantic moment for the couple and guests.
• The couple's "first bite" of their wedding meal, which can be made playful and symbolises their first meal as a married couple.
• A cross hand-in-hand champagne toast to celebrate the couple coming together, which is less messy and can make for a great photo opportunity.
• Creating your own ritual that resonates with you and your partner.

Frequently asked questions