Ring Bearers: A Couple's Wedding Tradition

why do couples have a ring bearer

The role of a ring bearer is to present the wedding rings to the couple during the ceremony. Typically, the ring bearer is a young boy, usually between the ages of three and ten, who walks down the aisle carrying the rings on a decorative pillow. The tradition of having a ring bearer is believed to have originated in ancient times, with some historians tracing it back to ancient Egypt, where a young boy would carry precious gems and jewels on a decorative pillow during wedding ceremonies. In medieval times, ring bearers presented the rings atop a sword.

Today, the ring bearer is often a child of those close to the couple, such as the kids of the maid of honour or best man, the couple's nephews, or children of other friends or family members. The role is not limited to boys, however, and some couples choose to have a girl or even a pet as their ring bearer.

Characteristics Values
Age Between 3 and 10 years old
Gender Usually a boy, but can be a girl or even a pet
Relation to couple Close to the couple, e.g. nephew, godson, son of closest friends, or own child
Main task Carry the wedding rings to the couple
Other tasks Charming the crowd, appearing in photos, participating in the entrance
Outfit Formalwear, e.g. tux, pants, suspenders, bow tie, cute belt, hat
Gift Yes, a gift is customary

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The role of the ring bearer

The ring bearer is a wedding party role typically given to a young child, usually between the ages of three and ten. The child precedes the bride down the aisle, often walking at the same time as the flower girl, and carries the wedding rings on a pillow.

The ring bearer is usually a boy, but modern weddings are seeing a shift towards gender neutrality, with girls and even pets taking on the role. The ring bearer is often a close relative of the couple, such as a nephew, godson, or cousin, or the child of a close friend.

The main duty of the ring bearer is to carry the wedding rings to the couple. If the ring bearer is very young, their role may also include charming the crowd. The ring bearer usually walks after the bridesmaids and groomsmen, carrying a small pillow with the rings tied to it, and passes the rings to the best man or wedding officiant.

The ring bearer's attire should fit the style of the wedding and coordinate with the rest of the wedding party. Formalwear, such as a tux, suspenders, a bow tie, and a cute belt, are popular choices for little boys. For girls, a floaty dress that coordinates with the bridesmaid gowns is a good option.

In terms of logistics, the ring bearer's parents play an essential role. They handle any potential meltdowns and may walk alongside the ring bearer if needed. The parents can also help plan time for snacks and naps to ensure the child is ready and energised for the ceremony.

While the role of the ring bearer is not essential to the wedding, it is a wonderful way to involve a special young person or pet in the celebration.

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Who receives the rings?

The ring bearer is responsible for delivering the wedding rings to either the best man or the wedding officiant. The best man or officiant will then hold the rings until the couple is ready to exchange them.

If the ring bearer is old enough to walk, they will head down the aisle after the wedding party and deliver the rings. If the ring bearer is too young to walk, their parent or guardian can carry them during the processional, or they could be escorted by the flower girls. Alternatively, someone could pull the ring bearer in a wagon or small car.

Most couples choose to have the best man carry the real rings, and the ring bearer carries fake rings as a precaution. The fake rings can be tied to a ribbon on the pillow for the full effect.

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Choosing a ring bearer

Age and Gender

While the ring bearer is traditionally a young boy, you can break with tradition and choose a girl or even an adult to fill this role. If you want to stick with the traditional age range, look for children between the ages of three and eight, as this ensures they are mature enough to handle the responsibilities. However, if you have your heart set on an older child, consider giving them a junior groomsman or bridesmaid role instead. Keep in mind that the most important factor is choosing someone you and your partner are close to, as this will foster a comfortable dynamic in the lead-up to and on the big day.

Relationship to the Couple

The ring bearer is typically someone closely linked to the couple, such as a nephew, godson, cousin, or the child of a close friend. Picking someone from within the family or close circle ensures a special bond and creates lasting memories for both the couple and the ring bearer. It is also important to communicate openly with the parents of the potential ring bearer to ensure they are up for the task and can assist with any necessary preparations.

Duties and Responsibilities

The main duty of the ring bearer is to carry the wedding rings down the aisle during the ceremony. However, they may also be involved in other tasks such as pulling a wagon of flower petals, walking the family dog down the aisle, or holding a chalkboard sign. If you choose a young ring bearer, their secondary duty is to charm the crowd! It is important to clearly communicate the duties and expectations to the child and their parents to ensure everyone is on the same page.

Attire and Accessories

The ring bearer's attire should fit the style and formality of the wedding. Tiny tuxedos, suits, or khakis with bowties and suspenders are all adorable options. You can also coordinate their outfits with the rest of the wedding party for a cohesive look. Don't forget the accessories! Suspenders, bowties, cute belts, and hats can all add a touch of personality and style to their ensemble. Just be sure to prioritise comfort, as the ring bearer will be wearing the outfit for most of the day.

Rehearsal and Preparation

It is recommended to invite the ring bearer to the wedding rehearsal, as this will help them feel included and give them a chance to practice walking down the aisle. The rehearsal is also a great opportunity to brief the ring bearer on their duties and responsibilities, so they know exactly what to do on the big day. If you are having a rehearsal dinner, consider including the ring bearer and their parents, as they are part of the wedding party.

Gifts and Gratitude

It is customary to give the ring bearer a gift as a token of appreciation for their role in your special day. This can be a fun toy or a more serious keepsake that commemorates the occasion. A thoughtful gift is a wonderful way to show your gratitude and create a lasting memory for the ring bearer and their family.

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The history of ring bearers

In the Victorian era, a similar role was called a page boy. At weddings, usually aristocratic ones, a boy would assist the bride by carrying the back of her train as they walked down the aisle. The boy was often related to the marrying couple in some way.

During the Medieval era, ring bearers took a different approach. Instead of carrying wedding bands on a pillow, they would present the couple with their rings atop a sword. This practice was likely a way for wealthy families to display their riches, as pillows were considered rare and symbols of wealth.

Today, the role of the ring bearer is typically given to young children, usually boys aged between three and ten. However, the role is not limited to boys, as couples may choose to have a girl or even a pet as a ring bearer. The ring bearer usually walks down the aisle after the bridesmaids and groomsmen and carries the wedding rings on a small pillow. While the role of the ring bearer is not essential, it is a way to involve a special someone in the wedding festivities and create lasting memories.

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The ring bearer's duties

The ring bearer is usually a young boy between the ages of three and ten. However, the role can be performed by a girl, a couple's pet, or an adult. The ring bearer is often a close relative of the couple, such as a nephew, godson, or cousin, or the child of a close friend. The ring bearer's parents also play an important role, as they are responsible for handling any potential meltdowns and ensuring their child is well-rested and fed for the ceremony.

The main duty of the ring bearer is to carry the wedding rings to the couple during the ceremony. The ring bearer usually walks after the bridesmaids and groomsmen and right before the flower girl, who will introduce the bride. The ring bearer may carry the rings on a pillow, which is the traditional option, or choose something more creative that represents the couple, such as a softball glove or a briefcase labelled "Ring Security".

The ring bearer passes the rings to the best man or person of honour, who holds them until the couple is ready to exchange rings. The ring bearer then stands with the wedding party or sits with their parents, depending on their comfort level. After the ceremony, the ring bearer should be present for photos with the wedding party.

The ring bearer should attend the wedding rehearsal to familiarise themselves with the process and ease any nerves. They should also coordinate with the couple and their parents to choose an outfit that fits the wedding's theme and formality.

While the role of the ring bearer is not essential, it is a way to involve a special young person in the couple's big day and honour them.

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Frequently asked questions

A ring bearer is a young child, usually a boy, who carries the wedding rings down the aisle during the ceremony.

The ring bearer is a long-standing tradition, dating back to ancient Egypt, where a young boy would carry precious gems and jewels to the altar on a decorative pillow. The tradition is also believed to have originated in the Medieval era, where a child carrying the rings on a pillow was a symbol of wealth.

The ring bearer is usually a boy between the ages of three and ten, but the role can be performed by a girl or even a pet. The child is typically someone close to the couple, such as a nephew, godson, or the child of a friend.

The ring bearer's outfit should be comfortable and formal, such as a tux, suspenders, a bow tie, or a mini version of the groom's suit. The outfit should also fit the wedding's theme and be coordinated with the rest of the wedding party.

The main duty of the ring bearer is to carry the wedding rings to the couple during the ceremony. They usually walk down the aisle after the bridesmaids and groomsmen and pass the rings to the best man or wedding officiant. The ring bearer may also be included in wedding photos and the grand entrance during the introduction of the wedding party.

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