Planning A Small Wedding: Where To Begin?

where to start planning a small wedding

Planning a wedding can be stressful, especially when it comes to small weddings as there is a sense of guilt that couples planning big weddings don't experience. A small wedding is typically defined as 50 people or fewer and allows for more room for personalisation, is more eco-friendly, and decreases planning stress. To start planning a small wedding, it is recommended to first decide on the vision for your wedding, including the size, location, cost, date, and priorities. Next, you should create a budget and guest list, and decide on a venue. Once you have a venue, you can start booking vendors, such as catering and photography, and thinking about the schedule for the day.

Characteristics Values
Planning timeline 12-18 months is the typical timeline for wedding planning
Vision Discuss the vision for the wedding with your partner, including the size, location, cost, date, and priorities
Budget Figure out how much you can afford to spend
Guest list Make a short guest list of immediate family members, close friends, and people you can't imagine not being there
Venue Choose a venue that aligns with your desired vibe and activities for the day
Vendors Research and reach out to vendors, starting with those who can only work one wedding at a time, such as catering and photography
Timing and logistics Create a comprehensive schedule for the wedding day, including timing for hair and makeup, vendor arrivals, transportation, speeches, first dance, cake cutting, etc.
Marriage license Don't forget to reserve time to obtain your marriage license, as they are typically only valid for a few months
Gifts Show gratitude to loved ones helping with the wedding by shopping for gifts for them
Accommodations Secure hotel room blocks at nearby hotels for out-of-town guests

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Budgeting and venue

Budgeting:

Determining your budget is a crucial first step in planning your small wedding. Begin by discussing with your partner how much you are willing and able to spend. Be realistic and honest about your financial situation, and consider what is truly important to you both about the day. This will help guide your spending and ensure that your budget aligns with your priorities.

To create a comprehensive budget, research the cost of different components, such as the venue, catering, photography, attire, and decorations. Excel spreadsheets or online wedding budget templates can assist in categorizing and calculating expenses. Account for hidden costs like gratuities, vendor tips, and extra decorations—these small expenses can quickly add up and push you over budget.

Consider ways to cut costs without sacrificing the elements that are important to you. For example, inviting fewer guests will reduce expenses on food, beverages, and rentals. You might also opt for a venue with tables and chairs included, saving you from additional rental costs.

Venue:

The venue you choose will significantly impact the atmosphere and overall experience of your small wedding. Consider a place that resonates with you and your partner's interests and personalities. For instance, if you're both adventurers who love the outdoors, an outdoor venue like a National Park could be perfect for an intimate ceremony.

When touring venues, keep in mind that some may offer inclusions that can save you money, such as tables and chairs on-site. Ask about multi-day rate deals if you also plan to host your rehearsal dinner there. Additionally, inquire about discounts—whether they are upfront about it or not, many venues will be willing to negotiate on price.

Remember, the venue often determines the wedding date, so it's one of the first things to secure. Once you have your venue and date set, you can start booking vendors and making more detailed plans.

Planning a small wedding can be a fun and exciting process when you have the right tools and mindset. By focusing on budgeting wisely and selecting a venue that suits your vision, you're well on your way to creating a memorable and personalized celebration.

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Guest list

Planning a wedding can be a stressful task, especially when it comes to deciding on a guest list. Here are some tips to help you create the perfect guest list for your small wedding:

Start with Close Family

Begin by adding both sets of parents and your closest family members to the list. This can include immediate family members and important mentors, as well as their plus-ones and/or children. It is also common to include close friends in this category, ensuring that you have a personal relationship with everyone on the list.

Prioritize Intimacy and Connection

Small weddings are a great way to create a sense of meaning and connection with your guests. To achieve this, consider limiting your guest list to around 50 people or fewer. This number allows for a more intimate setting, where you can schedule time to connect with each guest, creating a memorable experience for everyone involved.

Manage Expectations

Be transparent with your parents or any contributing parties about your plans for an intimate wedding. They may have their own list of guests they wish to invite, so it is important to set clear expectations early on. Respectfully ask them to limit their list and consider providing them with a specific number of invitees.

Stick to Your Decisions

Once you have decided on your guest list, commit to those choices and confidently explain your rationale if needed. This will help mitigate any hurt feelings and ensure that you feel empowered by your decisions. Remember, you are not obligated to invite everyone you know, and it is perfectly acceptable to only include those closest to you.

Consider Venue Capacity

The wedding venue you choose can also help determine your guest list size. Opting for venues with small wedding spaces naturally limits the number of guests you can invite. This can work in your favor, creating a cozy and intimate atmosphere for your special day.

Plan for Out-of-Town Guests

If you are expecting out-of-town guests, consider securing hotel room blocks at nearby hotels. This simplifies transportation logistics and makes it easier for your guests to book accommodations at discounted rates. It also keeps your guests consolidated, making it more convenient to deliver welcome bags or plan additional activities.

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Timing and schedule

Timing and scheduling are crucial aspects of wedding planning, ensuring that your special day runs smoothly and efficiently. Here is a comprehensive guide to help you plan the timing and schedule for your small wedding:

Pre-Wedding Planning Timeline:

First, determine your desired engagement length. The ideal length is typically considered to be 12 to 18 months, allowing ample time for planning. However, every couple is unique, and some may prefer a shorter or longer engagement. If you opt for a shorter engagement, condense the wedding planning tasks accordingly.

Next, it's advisable to start by selecting your wedding venue. The venue often dictates other aspects of your planning, such as the date, theme, and guest list. Once you have the venue locked in, you can set your wedding date and begin booking vendors. Prioritize vendors who can only cater to one wedding at a time, such as caterers and photographers.

Approximately a year in advance, it's time to choose your wedding attire. Ordering a wedding dress usually takes 6 to 9 months, and alterations can take an additional 4 to 8 weeks. For those in your wedding party, it's considerate to ask them to stand in the wedding about 12 months before the big day, giving them ample time to plan their outfits and any necessary travel arrangements.

At this stage, it's also essential to start gathering the necessary documents for your marriage license. Research the requirements early, as licenses are typically only valid for a few months, and destination weddings may have unique stipulations.

Five months before the wedding, it's customary for the couple to be on the same page about their honeymoon plans. Discuss your budget, timing, travel arrangements, and a basic itinerary. This conversation will ensure you're both aligned on the key aspects of your honeymoon.

Wedding Day Timeline:

Creating a comprehensive wedding-day schedule is vital to ensuring a seamless flow of events. This schedule should account for the full day, from the moment you start getting ready until the last song of the night. A detailed timeline will help keep everyone informed, from your wedding party to your vendors. Include specific times for hair and makeup appointments, vendor arrivals, transportation logistics, the couple's arrival at the reception, speeches, the first dance, cake-cutting, and any other significant moments.

Consider starting your ceremony about 15 minutes later than the invitation time. This buffer gives guests extra time if they are running late and ensures that all seats are filled when you make your grand entrance.

If your ceremony and reception are in different locations, be sure to account for travel time in your schedule. You don't want your guests to feel rushed or arrive at the reception flustered.

Finally, don't forget to include some downtime for yourselves in the schedule. A quick break for just the two of you can help you re-energize before rejoining your guests for the rest of the festivities.

A well-planned timeline is the key to a stress-free wedding day, allowing you to focus on enjoying the celebration with your loved ones.

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Vendors and catering

When it comes to vendors and catering, there are a few key considerations to keep in mind. Firstly, it's important to prioritise booking your venue before anything else, as this will determine your wedding date. Once you have a venue locked in, you can start thinking about catering and other vendors.

Catering is a significant aspect of the wedding experience, and it's essential to ensure your guests have a delicious and plentiful meal. The average cost of wedding catering in the US is $4,000, with couples spending between $1,800 to $7,000, but prices can vary widely depending on factors such as location, guest count, vendor experience, and level of expertise. If you're having a small wedding, be prepared for minimum spending requirements from caterers, which can be as high as $5,000. To save costs, consider opting for smaller catering companies or even having your wedding meal at a nearby restaurant if your guest list is very small.

When choosing a caterer, think about the style of your event. Will it be a sit-down dinner, a buffet, or passed appetizers? Explore menus, presentation options, and ask for a detailed breakdown of costs. Check reviews from previous couples and, if possible, set up a tasting to sample the food before making your final decision. It's also a good idea to check with your guests about any food allergies or dietary restrictions they may have to ensure everyone is accommodated.

In addition to catering, there are other vendors to consider. Photography is an important one, as you'll want to capture the memories of your special day. Like caterers, photographers can often only work one wedding at a time, so it's best to book them early. Other vendors to consider include entertainment, such as a DJ or band, and any additional services you may want, such as hair and makeup artists, transportation, or decor specialists.

Finally, don't forget to create a comprehensive schedule for your wedding day. This will ensure everyone, including your vendors, is on the same page about timing and locations. Send copies to your caterers, photographers, and any other vendors you've hired, so they know exactly where to be and when.

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Gifts and gratitude

Gifts for the Couple

When choosing gifts for the couple, it is important to consider their interests and needs. Here are some gift ideas:

  • A pair of personalized champagne flutes
  • A framed rendition of "The Art of Marriage"
  • A classic mixer for couples who enjoy baking
  • Luggage with a hard shell, TSA-approved lock, and multi-directional wheel spinners
  • A digital picture frame that connects to an app, allowing the couple to upload and display their wedding and honeymoon photos
  • Gift cards or vouchers, such as a Solo Stove digital voucher for outdoorsy couples
  • Small gifts such as candles or decorative items

Gratitude and Thank-You Gifts

Expressing gratitude is an important aspect of wedding etiquette. Here are some ways to show your appreciation:

  • Send thank-you notes or cards to your guests within a few months after the wedding. Personalize the notes with heartfelt messages or use thank-you quotes if you're struggling with what to write.
  • For those who have played a significant role in the wedding, such as the maid of honor or best man, consider giving them a more elaborate or expensive gift to show your appreciation.
  • Host a small get-together before the ceremony to display the gifts you've received and thank your guests in person.
  • If you have to postpone the wedding, you may keep the gifts. However, if you cancel the wedding, it is expected that you return the gifts to the senders.

Frequently asked questions

First, you should consider the vision for your wedding. Do you want a casual or formal wedding? Do you want a fun, casual dance party or something more formal and elegant? Once you have decided on the vision, you can start to plan the details.

A small wedding consists of 50 people or fewer. You should include immediate family members and close friends, and generally, people you can't imagine not being at your wedding.

You can choose a venue that is meaningful to you and your partner, such as a place you both visit often or your own backyard. You can also look at inns, bed and breakfasts, upscale restaurants, or even Airbnb.

It's important to set boundaries and manage expectations with your family and friends. Small weddings can be more affordable, but you still need to create a budget and stick to it. Don't forget to plan for things like transportation, accommodations for out-of-town guests, and your honeymoon.

It's recommended to start planning 12-18 months in advance. You should start by touring venues and booking vendors, especially those who can only work one wedding at a time, such as catering and photography.

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