Wedding Bands: When To Gift Another

There are many reasons why a wife might receive a second wedding band from her husband. Some couples choose to celebrate milestone anniversaries with anniversary bands, which can be given as gifts to symbolise love or as replacements for simpler engagement rings. Popular styles for milestone gifts include three-stone rings and eternity bands. Others give their wives a second band to celebrate the birth of a child, or to mark an important occasion such as buying a house together. A second band can also be given as a symbol of renewed commitment following a rough patch in the relationship. While there are no hard-and-fast rules, most people give their wives a second wedding band after they have been married for some time, often after reaching milestones such as the 10-year, 15-year or 25-year anniversaries.

Wedding bands and personal preference

There are many traditions and considerations when it comes to wedding bands, and it can be a confusing process for couples to decide which ring goes on the finger first. Ultimately, the short answer is that there is no right or wrong way, and it is entirely up to personal preference. Some couples may follow traditions, while others may choose to embrace more modern customs.

One tradition holds that the engagement ring is worn on the left hand, based on the belief of the ancient Egyptians in the "vena amoris", a Latin term meaning "vein of love". According to this belief, a vein runs directly from the ring finger on the left hand to the heart, making it the ideal placement for a ring as a symbol of devotion and commitment.

However, modern times have introduced new complexities, with couples now often having an engagement ring, a wedding band, and sometimes additional rings such as infinity or eternity rings to commemorate milestones in their marriage. Eternity rings are usually the third ring worn on the engagement finger, sitting on the side furthest from the body.

Some couples choose to give anniversary bands to celebrate milestone anniversaries, such as the 10-year, 15-year, and 25-year marks. These rings can be simple or intricate and may feature gemstones or diamonds. There are no hard rules, and some choose to give an anniversary band on an "off" year like the 4-year or 7-year anniversary as a surprise.

Another tradition is to give a second wedding band when a couple has their first child, sometimes known as a "push present". This tradition may have been started by the jewellery industry to sell more jewellery, but it is gaining popularity. Some people choose to incorporate birthstones into the additional band to create a family ring.

At the end of the day, the decision of when and how to give a second wedding band is entirely up to the couple and their preferences. There is no one-size-fits-all approach, and each couple can choose to embrace traditions or create their own modern customs.

Wedding band placement

There is no single correct way to wear a wedding band, and ultimately, it's up to you how you wear it. Here are some of the most common ways to wear a wedding band:

Wear Your Engagement Ring First, Wedding Band on Top

It might make sense to wear your rings in the order you received them. Symbolically, the idea that your engagement represents a promise and your wedding band crystallizes that promise might appeal to you. Wearing your wedding band on the outside gives your engagement story a sort of figurative bookend—first, you're engaged, now it's official.

Wear Your Wedding Band First, Engagement Ring on Top

This is perhaps the most common way to wear your rings. If you go with this option, you can remove your engagement ring before the wedding ceremony so that you don't have to deal with potentially losing it or awkwardly fumbling with it at the altar. Wear it on your right hand or keep it in a safe place, then slip it back on during or after the reception.

Wear Both Rings on Your Left Hand

In Western cultures, wearing both rings on the left hand is the most common way to wear wedding and engagement rings. This tradition stems from the belief that the fourth finger on the left hand has a vein running directly to the heart. We now know that all fingers have venous connections to the heart, but the tradition persists.

Wear Both Rings on Your Right Hand

In some cultures, including Northern and Eastern European countries such as Russia, Poland and Denmark, it is customary to wear both rings on the right hand. In India, Greece, Spain and Portugal, couples also wear their wedding rings on the right hand.

Wear Your Engagement Ring on One Hand, Wedding Band on Another

If your band doesn't match your engagement ring, or you don't like the way the rings sit together on one finger, you might prefer this option. It's also a good choice if you don't like to stack more than one ring on a single finger. In Germany and the Netherlands, it's common to see couples wearing their engagement rings on the right hand and their wedding bands on the left.

Wear Your Wedding Band and Engagement Ring Your Way

There are no rules when it comes to wearing your wedding band and engagement ring. Couples are increasingly making their own traditions, with some moving their jewellery from hand to hand, or even wearing their rings on a chain around their neck. You don't even have to wear them at the same time—some people wear their wedding bands every day and reserve their engagement rings for special occasions, or vice versa.

Infinity or eternity rings

Infinity and eternity rings are often gifted to mark marital milestones, such as a 10-year anniversary or the birth of a first child. They can also be given as Valentine's Day gifts or to celebrate other important occasions, like the purchase of a new home.

Infinity Rings

Infinity rings are designed with the infinity symbol, or figure 8, incorporated into the band. The symbol can be added to the ring in several ways: some infinity rings feature the infinity sign at the top of the ring, where a centre diamond would typically be placed. Other designs replicate the infinity symbol in the band itself, and some people refer to bands that mimic this shape with a twisting pattern as infinity rings. Infinity rings are often made of silver, but can also be crafted from platinum, gold, palladium, or titanium.

Eternity Rings

Eternity rings are crafted with diamonds or vibrant gemstones that go all the way around the band, in an endless circle. They are typically given in addition to an engagement or wedding ring, usually later in a relationship or marriage, or to commemorate an important anniversary. Eternity rings are traditionally worn on the third finger of the left hand, with the wedding ring worn first, followed by the engagement ring, and then the eternity ring.

Ordering of Rings

There is no right or wrong way to order the rings—only traditions and non-traditions. Some brides choose to wear their wedding ring on one hand and their engagement ring on the other, while others stack all three rings on the same finger.

Anniversary bands

An anniversary band is typically a multi-diamond or gemstone ring, which can be either simple or intricate. Popular styles include the three-stone ring, representing the past, present, and future, and the eternity band, featuring diamonds all the way around the ring, symbolising everlasting love.

There are no hard-and-fast rules about when to give an anniversary band, and it is a matter of personal preference. Most couples choose to celebrate milestone anniversaries with an anniversary band, such as the 10, 15, or 25-year mark. However, you don't have to wait for a particular anniversary, and giving an anniversary band on an 'off' year can be a wonderful surprise.

You could incorporate the anniversary year you are celebrating into the ring, for example, by giving a ring with the same number of diamonds or gemstones as the number of years you have been married. You could then upgrade the ring every few years by adding more diamonds! Alternatively, you could give a fun gemstone ring for an 'off' anniversary and then a more intricate diamond band for a milestone anniversary.

Second wedding band traditions

Wedding ring traditions have evolved over the years, with the first wedding rings believed to have been used in ancient Rome and Greece, initially associated with the marital dowry and later with a promise of fidelity. The modern exchange of rings can be traced back to Europe in the Middle Ages as part of Christendom.

In Western culture, wedding rings are typically worn on the base of the left ring finger, with the vein in that finger believed to be connected to the heart. In some cultures, the ring is worn on the right hand.

There are various traditions surrounding the exchange of rings. In some cultures, the groom's ring becomes a wedding ring during the nuptials, bestowed anew by the bride. In others, the groom receives a separate wedding ring. In Germany, Austria, and the Netherlands, it has been customary for both spouses to exchange and wear wedding rings since at least the 1870s. In the United States and Canada, wedding rings were initially only worn by wives, but this changed during the 20th century, with grooms also exchanging and wearing rings.

While there are no set rules, anniversary bands are often given to commemorate milestone anniversaries, such as the 10-year, 15-year, and 25-year anniversaries. These rings can be simple gifts of love or replacements for more simple engagement sets. Popular styles include three-stone rings, representing the past, present, and future, and eternity bands, symbolizing everlasting love.

Infinity or eternity rings are also sometimes given to mark significant milestones in a marriage, such as a milestone anniversary or the birth of a child. These rings can be worn in various ways, stacked with the wedding and engagement rings or on a separate hand, depending on personal preference and comfort.

Frequently asked questions