Heartfelt Words For The Happy Couple: Crafting The Perfect Wedding Red Envelope Message

Red envelopes are a common way to gift money at weddings in Chinese culture. The red colour symbolises luck and good fortune, while the money inside is intended to help the newlyweds pay for wedding costs and start their new life together. The amount of money included in the envelope is usually at least equal to the cost of the guest's meal at the wedding banquet, with the final amount depending on the guest's relationship to the couple. The envelopes are often decorated with Chinese calligraphy and symbols conveying good luck and prosperity, such as the character 福, which means blessing, or “double happiness” symbols.

How much money to put in a wedding red envelope

The amount of money placed in a wedding red envelope varies depending on the giver's relationship with the couple, their age, and their financial situation.

In Chinese culture, it is considered disrespectful and greedy to ask wedding guests for gifts or money. Hence, wedding guests are usually given the freedom to choose what gifts to give to the newlyweds. One of the most common and feasible gifts is the red envelope, which symbolises "good fortune". The amount placed in the red envelope is typically at least equal to the cost of the guest's meal at the wedding banquet. According to a study by ValuePenguin, the average wedding cost per guest in the US ranges from $127 to $278. Therefore, the amount in the red envelope should be around $130 to $300.

The amount of money in the red envelope can also depend on the relationship between the giver and the couple. For instance, if the giver is a friend or a distant relative, the amount could be closer to $130. However, if the giver is a close friend or immediate family member, the amount could range from $200 to $300.

Some people also believe that the amount of money in the red envelope should be a lucky number. In Chinese culture, the number 4 is avoided as it sounds similar to the word for "death". Instead, numbers like 8 and 9, which symbolise fortune and longevity, are considered lucky. Therefore, amounts like $188 or $288 are often given.

Additionally, it is important to note that the money inside the red envelope should be new and crisp. Folding the money or giving old or wrinkled bills is considered bad manners.

Why red envelopes are used for weddings

Red envelopes are used for weddings in Chinese culture. The colour red symbolises luck, good fortune, energy, and happiness. The red envelopes are usually decorated with gold Chinese characters, such as "happiness", "wealth", and "double happiness". The envelopes are filled with money, which is believed to bring good fortune to the recipient.

The custom of giving red envelopes originates from Chinese New Year traditions. According to legend, a demon named Sui would terrorise children in their sleep. To protect the children, parents would light candles and stay awake on Chinese New Year's Eve. In one story, a child was given eight coins to play with to stay awake. The child wrapped the coins in red paper and continued to unwrap and rewrap the coins until they fell asleep. When Sui tried to touch the child's head, the eight coins emitted a strong light and scared the demon away. The eight coins turned out to be eight fairies. From then on, giving red envelopes became a way to keep children safe and bring good luck.

At weddings, the red envelopes are given by guests to the couple as wedding gifts. The money inside helps the newlyweds pay for the wedding costs and start their new life together. The amount of money inside depends on the relationship between the guest and the couple, with closer relationships giving more money. The money is also meant to cover the guest's meal at the wedding banquet.

In addition to red envelopes, gold jewellery is also a common traditional Chinese wedding gift. Gold symbolises nobility and wealth, carrying well-wishes for the couple's abundant life together.

How to choose the right design

When choosing the right design for a wedding red envelope, there are several factors to consider. Here are some guidelines to help you select an appropriate and well-received design:

Colour

Red symbolizes luck and good fortune in Chinese culture, which is why red envelopes are used for weddings and other celebratory events. While other colours like white are used for funerals, it is best to stick to the traditional red for weddings.

Characters and Symbols

Traditional red envelopes are often decorated with gold Chinese characters such as "福" ("fú"), meaning blessing or good fortune, or "喜喜" ("double happiness"), representing a long-lasting marriage. Other popular designs include four-character expressions like 天作之合 ("tiānzuò zhīhé), a marriage made in heaven) or 百年好合 ("bǎinián hǎo hé), a happy union for 100 years. You can also opt for neutral designs with a single Chinese character, such as "福" ("fú"), which is suitable for most celebratory occasions.

Customisation

If you want to add a personal touch, you can customise your red envelopes with the couple's surname or other details. This can be done through custom printing services, which you can easily find online.

Cultural Sensitivity

Be mindful of cultural norms and superstitions when choosing a design. For instance, the number four is considered unlucky in Chinese culture as it sounds similar to the word for death. Thus, it is best to avoid this number and opt for even numbers instead, as good things are believed to come in pairs. Eight is a particularly auspicious number, as it sounds similar to the word for good luck or fortune.

Occasion

Consider the versatility of the design. If you want to use the red envelopes for multiple occasions, opt for more general designs like "福" ("fú"), which is suitable for weddings, Chinese New Year, birthdays, and other celebrations.

Quality

Finally, choose high-quality envelopes that reflect the importance of the occasion. Look for envelopes made from premium materials like silk or embossed paper, ensuring they are the appropriate size and have beautiful, clear calligraphy or printing.

By following these guidelines, you can choose a wedding red envelope design that is culturally appropriate, meaningful, and well-received by the newlyweds.

How to give and receive a red envelope

Red envelopes, also known as "lai see" in Cantonese and "hong bao" in Mandarin, are a common way for Chinese people to show appreciation during important celebrations such as Chinese New Year, birthdays, and weddings. The act of giving and receiving red envelopes is a solemn one, and they are always presented and received with both hands. Here are some guidelines on how to give and receive a red envelope:

Giving a Red Envelope:

• Choose new, crisp bills. Avoid coins and cheques.
• Avoid the number four in the amount given, as it sounds similar to the word for death in Chinese.
• Amounts ending in eight or nine are considered positive, as eight rhymes with the word for good luck, and nine symbolises longevity.
• The amount given depends on the situation and your relationship with the recipient. For weddings, the amount should be equivalent to a nice gift or enough to cover the guest's expenses.
• For Chinese New Year, it is common to give red envelopes to children, relatives, friends, and parents.
• At birthdays, red envelopes are often given to young children.

Receiving a Red Envelope:

• When receiving a red envelope, use both hands.
• At Chinese New Year and birthdays, the recipient should not open the envelope in front of the giver.
• At weddings, there is usually a table at the entrance where guests give their red envelopes to attendants, who will open and record the amount. This is done for bookkeeping purposes and to ensure the newlyweds can reciprocate with a higher amount at the guest's wedding.

The significance of red envelopes in Chinese culture

The red envelope, or "hongbao" in Mandarin, is a long, narrow, ornate red paper envelope. They are given on important occasions such as Chinese New Year, birthdays, and weddings, as well as graduations, births, and business ventures. The colour red symbolises luck, good fortune, energy, and happiness in Chinese culture. The act of giving and receiving red envelopes is a solemn one, and they are always presented and received with both hands.

The tradition of giving red envelopes originates from one of the oldest stories of Chinese New Year. The legend goes that a demon named Sui would terrorise children in their sleep on New Year's Eve. To protect them, parents would try to keep their children awake all night. One year, a child was given eight coins to play with to stay awake, but eventually fell asleep. Sui appeared, but the coins emitted a powerful light that drove the demon away. The eight coins were revealed to be eight fairies in disguise. From then on, giving red envelopes became a way to keep children safe and bring good luck. The red envelope is sometimes known as "yasui qian", or "suppressing Sui money".

Red envelopes are also used at weddings. There is a table at the entrance of the wedding reception where guests give their red envelopes to attendants and sign their names in a register. The attendants will open the envelope, count the money, and record it next to the guest's name. This is done for bookkeeping purposes, and also because when unmarried guests eventually get married, the newlyweds are obliged to give them more money than they received at their wedding. The amount given depends on the relationship between the guest and the couple, but it is common to cover the cost of attendance at the wedding.

Red envelope designs for weddings usually feature a "double happiness" sign or a Chinese wedding proverb that indicates a long-lasting marriage. A neutral design featuring the Chinese character "fu", meaning "blessing", is also a safe choice.

Frequently asked questions