Crafting Gratitude: The Art Of Writing Heartfelt Wedding Thank-You Notes

what to write in a wedding thank you note

Writing wedding thank-you notes can be a daunting task, but it's a great opportunity to show your gratitude and care for your guests. Here's a simple guide to help you get started:

Before You Start Writing:

- Get organised: Create a spreadsheet with your guests' names, addresses, and any gifts they gave. This will make it easier to track gifts and send out notes promptly.

- Be timely: Thank-you notes are generally sent within two weeks for gifts received before the wedding and within three months for gifts received after the big day.

- Prepare your stationery: Choose thank-you cards that match your wedding theme or colours. It's a nice touch to order customised stationery with your wedding motif or monogram. Don't forget to stock up on stamps!

What to Include in Your Message:

- Thank guests for their attendance: Express your gratitude for their time, effort, and presence at your wedding. Mention any long distances travelled or special efforts made to be there.

- Thank guests for their gifts: Be sure to mention the specific gift and how you plan to use it. This shows that you received their gift and appreciate their thoughtfulness.

- Share memorable moments: Include a personal anecdote or a special memory you have of your guests from the wedding. This adds a warm and heartfelt touch to your message.

- Sign off with both your names: Even if only one of you is writing the notes, include both the bride's and groom's names at the end of each card.

Sample Wedding Thank-You Note:

Dear [Guest's Name],

Thank you so much for the [Gift]. [Partner's Name] and I are so excited to use it for [Plans for the gift]. We truly appreciate your thoughtfulness and generosity.

It was wonderful to have you at the wedding and celebrate this special day with us. We hope you had as much fun as we did!

Thank you again,

[Your Names]

Remember, you can adapt and personalise your messages to suit each guest. Happy writing!

Characteristics Values
Tone Formal or casual, depending on the recipient
Length Short and simple
Format Handwritten, not typed or printed
Timing Within two weeks for gifts received before the wedding; within three months for gifts received after the wedding
Content Thank the guest for their attendance; mention any gifts received, being specific about what the gift was and how it will be used; include a personalised note or anecdote

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How to address wedding thank-you cards

The exterior of the wedding thank-you card envelope should be handwritten and addressed in the same way as your wedding invitations. It is best to use full names (title, first name, middle name, last name) and try to avoid initials or nicknames. However, using a nickname for close family or friends is acceptable.

If you are sending the card to a couple, address each member who attended your wedding by name. It is perfectly fine to use their first names. Ultimately, you should do what feels right based on your relationship with them.

For guests who didn't attend the wedding but still sent gifts, be sure to send a thank-you card and note that you missed them at the festivities.

You can also send thank-you cards to guests who didn't give a gift. Include an anecdote from the wedding to make it more personal.

If you have a long guest list, you can opt for pre-printed thank-you cards with a generic message. However, it is always best to personalise each card.

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How to thank guests for their attendance

Thanking your guests for their attendance at your wedding is a thoughtful way to show your appreciation. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft the perfect thank-you notes:

Tips for Writing Thank-You Notes

  • Handwrite your notes: While it may be tempting to type or email your thank-you notes, taking the time to handwrite a message adds a personal touch and shows your guests that you genuinely appreciate them.
  • Prepare in advance: Choose your thank-you card design, select a high-quality pen, and stock up on stamps. You can also prepare a spreadsheet to track guest information, gifts received, and notes for personalisation.
  • Be timely: It is considered good etiquette to send thank-you notes promptly. Aim to send them within two weeks for pre-wedding gifts and within three months for post-wedding gifts.
  • Divide the task: Writing thank-you notes can be time-consuming, so divide the task with your partner. You can split the list of guests or write a few notes each day to avoid feeling overwhelmed.
  • Address them properly: Use full names and titles on the mailing envelopes. For close friends or family, nicknames are also appropriate.
  • Include all names: Address the thank-you note to all individuals within the party/household, even if you are not well-acquainted with them.

Examples of What to Write

  • "Thank you for adding to the joyful spirit of our wedding with your presence and lovely gift."
  • "Thank you for celebrating with us on our wedding day! Your company, love, and wishes made our day complete, and we appreciate your love and support."
  • "We sincerely thank you for your company, gift, and good wishes, and for helping us make our wedding day an occasion we will always remember."
  • "Thank you for being there on the most important day of our lives. We are grateful for your presence, warm wishes, and your generous gift. We look forward to making more memories with you in the future."
  • "Your presence at our wedding has added so much love to our special day, and your gift has brought us so much joy. It will help us build our life together."
  • "We are so grateful that you could be a part of our special day. Your presence at our wedding means the world to us! We loved seeing you on the dance floor and hope you enjoyed it as much as we did"

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How to thank guests for their gifts

Thanking guests for their gifts is an important part of wedding etiquette. Here are some tips and suggestions to help you craft the perfect thank-you notes:

Timing

It is considered good etiquette to send thank-you notes promptly. For gifts received before the wedding, it is recommended to send thank-you notes within two weeks. For gifts received after the wedding, aim to send them within three months. However, it is better to be late than never, so don't stress too much about timing.

Preparation

To make the process easier, it is a good idea to get organised in advance. Create a spreadsheet with your guests' names and addresses, and update it regularly. You can also add columns to track gifts and make notes about each guest, such as a meaningful card they wrote or a special moment you shared during the reception. This will come in handy when writing personalised thank-you notes.

Writing the Notes

  • Handwrite your notes. This adds a personal touch and shows that you took the time to write a thoughtful message.
  • Address each guest by name, even if you are sending the note to a couple or family.
  • Mention the gift by name and, if possible, include something specific about it, such as how you plan to use it or display it.
  • Include a sentence about how much you enjoyed celebrating with them and how much it meant to have them there.
  • End with a thoughtful sign-off, such as "warmly" or "with love".

Sample Messages

  • "Dear [Guest's Name], Thank you so much for the espresso machine! [Partner's Name] and I have become serious coffee fiends, and we are excited to be able to make our own drinks at home. We'd love to have you over for brunch soon so you can see it in action! Thank you again for sharing our special day. Best, [Your Names]"
  • "Dear [Guest's Name], Thank you so much for the gorgeous crystal bowl. It will look absolutely beautiful on our coffee table. It was so lovely to see you at the wedding—my mother always speaks so fondly of you, and [Partner's Name] and I were so happy to finally meet you in person! Sincerely, [Your Names]"
  • "Dear [Guest's Name], Thank you so much for the generous hardware store gift card. We're moving into a bit of a fixer-upper, and this will help us so much as we start our new life together. It means a lot to know you're thinking of us and wishing us well. Thank you again for your thoughtfulness! Sincerely, [Your Names]"

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How to thank guests for monetary gifts

It is important to express your gratitude to your wedding guests for their monetary gifts. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft thoughtful and heartfelt thank-you notes:

Use Discretion When Acknowledging Cash Gifts:

In the past, it was considered inappropriate to mention the amount of money received in a thank-you card. However, some etiquette experts now suggest that writing the amount confirms that you received the correct sum. Use your judgment based on your relationship with the guest.

Share How You Intend to Use the Money:

Guests appreciate knowing that their gift will be valued. Share your plans for the monetary gift, whether it's for a home renovation, a honeymoon fund, or something else. This adds a personal touch to your message.

Promptly Send Out Cards:

It is recommended to send thank-you notes within two weeks for gifts received before the wedding and within three months for gifts received after the wedding. Don't try to do them all at once; set aside 30 minutes each day to write a few.

Handwrite Your Notes:

Handwriting your thank-you notes shows that you took the time to personally craft a thoughtful message. It is more meaningful than a typed or emailed message.

Address the Guests Properly:

Address the guests by their names, even if you are only acquainted with one person in a couple. You can be informal in the card but use full names on the envelope, addressing them the same way you addressed your wedding invitations.

Express Gratitude and Name the Gift:

According to etiquette expert Elaine Swann, a great thank-you note has three essential elements: say "thank you," name the gift, and say something about it. You can mention how you plan to use the money or how it will make your life easier.

Include a Personal Touch:

Add a sentence about celebrating with them at the wedding or how excited you are to celebrate with them soon. You can also mention the next time you plan to see them.

"Dear [Guest's Name], Thank you so much for celebrating our wedding day with us! [Partner's Name] and I were thrilled with your generous and thoughtful gift of $100. Thanks to you, we were able to book the cooking class we'd had our eye on for our honeymoon. Looking forward to seeing you over the holidays! Love, [Your Names]"

"Thank you for your very generous gift/gift card. We will definitely put it to good use." It was wonderful to have you celebrate with us, and we are grateful for your presence and your gift as we start our married life together."

"Thank you so much for the generous cash/gift card. We plan to put it toward a new home/items for a new home in the future. Thanks for coming and sharing our special day with us!"

"Thank you for the very generous wedding gift. It makes so many things possible for us as we start our life together."

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How to thank guests who didn't give a gift

While it is not mandatory to send a thank-you note to guests who didn't bring a gift, you may still want to express your gratitude for their presence and support on your special day. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft thoughtful thank-you messages for these guests:

Tips for Writing Thank-You Notes to Guests Who Didn't Give a Gift:

  • It is generally agreed that you are not obligated to send thank-you cards to guests who didn't bring a gift. However, if you want to express your appreciation for their attendance, you can certainly do so.
  • Sending a thank-you note to guests who didn't give a gift is a kind gesture. It shows that you valued their presence and that their support meant a lot to you.
  • Be mindful of your wording to avoid sounding like you are fishing for a gift. Focus on thanking them for their presence and the joy they brought to your special day.
  • If you are unsure whether a guest gave a gift, it is better to send a thank-you note anyway. You can keep the message general and sincere without specifically mentioning a gift.
  • Consider mentioning any special efforts they made to be at your wedding, such as travelling a long distance or offering their support in other ways.

Examples of What to Write in a Thank-You Note:

  • "Thank you so much for celebrating our wedding day with us. It was so great to have you by our side as we welcomed the next chapter in our lives. We hope to see you again soon!"
  • "Thank you for attending our wedding. Your presence made our day extra special. We especially loved seeing you on the dance floor! We hope you enjoyed our day as much as we did. Sincerely, [Your Names]"
  • "Thank you for being a part of our big day. It meant so much to us to have you there to share in the celebration. We are so happy to count you as our friends. Best, [Your Names]"
  • "It was wonderful to have you at our wedding. We are grateful for your presence and the joy you brought to our special day. We hope you had as much fun as we did! Love, [Your Names]"
  • "Thank you for making the trip to celebrate with us. It meant so much to [Partner's Name] and me that you travelled all the way from [Location] just to be with us. We hope you had a fantastic time as well! Love, [Your Names]"

Frequently asked questions

A wedding thank-you note doesn't have to be long. A couple of sentences will do. Something short and personable can go a long way in showing your gratitude.

Yes, it is recommended to send a thank-you note to everyone, even if they didn't give a gift. You can also send thank-you notes to guests who weren't able to attend but sent well wishes, or suppliers who made your day extra special.

Here are some key points to include in your thank-you note:

- Thank your guests for attending.

- Thank your guests for their gift, mentioning the specific gift given (no need to note monetary amounts).

- Mention any special moments or memories from the wedding that you shared with the guest.

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