George Boyle
A wedding reception is a party held after the completion of a marriage ceremony. It is an opportunity for the newly married couple to receive their guests for the first time as a married couple. The reception is usually held in the evening, with dinner and drinks, but can also take the form of a luncheon, brunch, or afternoon tea. The average wedding reception lasts between four and seven hours, including a cocktail hour, dinner, toasts, and the first dances. The food served at a wedding reception is determined by the time of the wedding and local customs, and can range from non-alcoholic drinks and wedding cake to elaborate, multi-course dinners. The reception is also when the couple traditionally has their first dance, cuts the cake, and performs other rituals such as the bouquet toss.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Duration | Between half an hour to many hours or even days. Typically, 4-5 hours. |
| Location | Hotel ballrooms, banquet halls, community halls, social halls at the church, etc. |
| Food | Determined by the time of the wedding and local customs. Can range from non-alcoholic drinks with wedding cake to multi-course dinners. |
| Drinks | Alcoholic and non-alcoholic. |
| Music | DJ or live band. |
| Dances | First dance, mother and father of the bride and groom dances, bouquet and garter toss, etc. |
| Activities | Cake cutting, speeches, toasts, etc. |
| Dress code | Formal attire. |
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What You'll Learn
Cocktails and appetizers
If you're working with a tight budget, a cocktail wedding reception is a great way to save money. You can plan an elegant, shorter reception with drinks, appetizers, and mingling. If you want to serve only light appetizers, plan your wedding reception at a time other than dinner. As long as your party is planned around a mealtime, you won't need to serve a full meal. If your reception runs through dinner time, ensure you have enough food to fill your guests.
For a cocktail reception lasting 2 to 4 hours, plan to offer 8 to 12 pieces per person. If you want to replace dinner with appetizers, you'll need to plan for more substantial appetizers and increase the quantity to 12 to 15 pieces per person.
Now, what to serve? Choose appetizers that are crowd-pleasers and simple, such as small, bite-sized versions of your favorite foods like sliders, corn dogs, or pizza. You can also get creative and serve more adventurous dishes that highlight your culture or love story. Here are some ideas:
- Button mushrooms with caprese crostini
- Fried chicken on a biscuit with a pickle
- Bacon-wrapped dates
- Miniature burgers and sliders
- Marinated mozzarella with candied tomatoes
- Bite-size lobster rolls
- Korean rice cakes
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Dinner and speeches
The wedding speeches are usually given during the meal at the wedding reception. The father of the bride usually starts by welcoming the guests and thanking them for coming. The mother of the bride may also give a speech. The groom's family may also give a speech, although some couples opt for the father of the groom to speak at the rehearsal dinner instead. The maid of honour and best man usually give speeches towards the end of the dinner, followed by the special dances.
The sweet spot for starting the speeches is about three-quarters of the way through dinner, as guests are finishing their meals and still seated. This way, once the speeches are over, guests will be done eating, and the party can begin. It is recommended to keep the total length of the speeches to a maximum of 20 minutes. If there are more than four speeches, ensure each one is brief.
The maid of honour usually speaks first, followed by the best man. The best man's speech is typically saved for last. It is common for these wedding party VIPs to come at the end of the speech portion of the evening, after the parents' speeches.
Some couples opt to have all the speeches at the rehearsal dinner instead of the wedding reception. This allows for a simpler reception and gives nervous speakers a more intimate setting.
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Cake cutting
The wedding cake is a long-standing tradition and a popular choice for couples. It is often a multi-tiered, elaborately decorated, white frosted cake. However, there is no need to limit yourself to one flavour or design. Many couples opt for a cake with multiple tiers and flavours to satisfy all their guests.
The cake-cutting ceremony is an important part of the wedding reception. It usually happens after dinner, between the meal and the parent dances, or at the end of the dinner, just before the dancing begins. It is the last "official" event of the evening and signals to guests that the reception is coming to a close and they can start heading home.
Traditionally, the bride was responsible for handing out slices of cake, which represented fertility, to her guests. However, as wedding guest lists grew, the groom began to help with this task, and now the couple cuts the cake together. During the ceremony, one partner places their hand over the other's as they cut the first slice, symbolising their promise to support each other and reflecting their first responsibility as a married couple.
Some couples prefer to cut the cake earlier in the reception, particularly if they have older guests or families with young children who may want to leave early. Cutting the cake early also ensures that the photographer can capture the moment and saves money on additional hours of photography coverage.
The cake-cutting ceremony can be a special moment in the wedding reception, filled with symbolism and tradition, while also serving a practical purpose of signalling the end of the festivities.
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First dance and parent dances
The first dance is a special moment for the newlyweds as a married couple. Couples may choose to choreograph their first dance or wing it. Some couples also opt for contemporary hits or unconventional choices for their first dance. After the first dance, the guests traditionally join in the dancing, in order of precedence.
The order of the parent dances and other dances may vary according to preference. Some couples prefer to have the parent dances, such as the father-daughter and mother-son dances, immediately after the first dance. Others may choose to have the parent dances towards the end of dinner, after the toasts, or after the cake-cutting.
If the parent dances are taking place after dinner, the couple may opt to skip the wedding party dance and invite all guests to the dance floor. However, if you want to encourage your guests to dance, having the wedding party kick things off may be a good idea. The best man and maid of honour traditionally dance together first, followed by the rest of the wedding party.
The anniversary dance, also known as the bouquet dance, is a tradition where all married couples in the room are invited to the dance floor for a slow dance. The DJ or emcee will occasionally interrupt, asking couples who have been married for a certain number of years to take a seat. This continues until the couple married for the longest is the only one left on the dance floor.
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Bouquet and garter toss
The bouquet and garter toss is a wedding tradition that has been around for centuries. However, in recent times, it has been deemed by some as a dated ritual. It is entirely up to the couple to decide whether to include it or not.
The bouquet toss usually comes first, followed by the garter removal and toss by the groom. The woman who catches the bouquet sits down, and the man who catches the garter puts it on her leg. The bouquet toss can also be done differently, with the bride tossing a teddy bear into a crowd of children, which is a wedding tradition in Finland.
There are several alternatives to the traditional garter toss. One option is to skip the part where someone has to wear the garter and simply toss it to a group of loved ones. Another idea is to throw wedding favours to all the guests on the dance floor, as long as they are non-fragile.
The bouquet and garter toss can be a fun event for guests, especially if there are plenty of singles in attendance. It creates suspense and is a great way to get singles to meet on the dance floor. However, some guests may not want to participate, and it may make them uncomfortable.
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Frequently asked questions
A wedding reception is a party held after the completion of a marriage ceremony. It is a time for the couple to receive their guests for the first time as a married couple. The reception is usually held in a separate venue or area outside of the ceremony space.
A typical wedding reception starts with a cocktail hour, followed by the wedding party's grand entrance, dinner, toasts, and the first dance. The reception may also include parent dances, cake cutting, bouquet and garter toss, and other entertainment.
The MC or DJ directs the guests on what to do next and ensures that everything runs smoothly. They are in charge of announcing entrances and starting the playlist.
A wedding reception typically lasts between four and seven hours, including the cocktail hour. The length of the reception depends on the venue contract and may be subject to noise restrictions.
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