Best Man Speech: Capturing The Crowd's Attention

Being asked to be someone's best man is a tremendous honour, but it's also a role that comes with a lot of responsibility. One of the biggest tasks is delivering a memorable speech that strikes a balance between humorous memories and thoughtful anecdotes.

A good best man speech should be lighthearted and personal. It should include a warm introduction, anecdotes about the groom, thoughtful comments about the couple, and your good wishes for their future. It should also be concise, engaging, and no longer than 10 minutes.

Begin with a light-hearted icebreaker, a well-chosen joke, or a quote that showcases your relationship with the groom. Introduce yourself and share how you met your friend. You might also choose to read out messages from friends and family who couldn't be there.

Share amusing anecdotes and stories about the groom, but always keep it friendly and respectful. You can also give some light-hearted yet sincere advice for the newlyweds. Take a moment to compliment the couple and reflect on your favourite things about their relationship. Finally, conclude with a toast to the couple, wishing them a future filled with happiness.

Keep it concise

Keeping your speech concise is a key part of giving a good best man's speech. The ideal length for a best man's speech is between 3 and 10 minutes. This allows you to share a few meaningful stories and insights without losing the attention of your audience.

A good best man's speech should be light and entertaining, but it's easy to lose the room if your speech goes on for too long. As one source says, "I’ve never been to a wedding where anyone said, 'That was a great wedding, but the best man speech was just too short and that ruined it.'".

If there are multiple speakers at the wedding, your speech should be even shorter. If there are four speakers, aim for around eight minutes, and if there are five, around six minutes.

If you're giving a speech in America, you should also aim for the shorter end of the spectrum. Americans prefer their speeches to be shorter and more efficient, and this is no bad thing.

Be yourself

Being yourself is one of the most important aspects of delivering a best man's speech. Authenticity will make your speech more impactful and memorable, and the couple will appreciate the genuine tribute to your friendship. Here are some tips for delivering a best man's speech that is true to yourself:

Know Your Role

As the best man, your responsibilities go beyond delivering a speech. You are entrusted with important duties such as organising the bachelor party, assisting the groom with wedding preparations, and offering emotional support. On the wedding day, you may also be in charge of holding the rings and ensuring the groom's needs are met. Being there for the groom in the lead-up to the wedding will provide you with valuable insights and anecdotes to include in your speech.

Be Confident

Public speaking can be daunting, but remember that you are among friendly faces. The guests are there to celebrate the couple and are rooting for you. Take deep breaths, visualise yourself as a confident speaker, and focus on addressing the groom rather than the entire room. Practising your speech beforehand will also help to build your confidence.

Keep It Light and Straightforward

You don't need to adopt a character or put on a show. If you're not known as the comedian among your friends, don't feel compelled to crack jokes. Similarly, if sentimentality isn't your style, there's no need to force it. Keeping your speech light and straightforward is perfectly acceptable.

Share Stories

People are wired for stories, and sharing anecdotes is a great way to keep your audience engaged. Focus on tales that highlight the groom's character and provide insights into your relationship. Humorous, heartwarming, or even embarrassing stories can effectively showcase who the groom is and how much your friendship means to you.

Stay True to Your Personality

If you're not normally the funny one in the group, don't try to force a bunch of jokes into your speech. Likewise, if you're not usually sentimental, there's no need to force that either. The couple already knows and loves your personality, so the more genuine you are, the better your speech will be received.

Connect with the Audience

Make sure to maintain eye contact, speak clearly, use hand gestures, and express your emotions genuinely. Even the best speech will lose its impact if you're looking at the ground and mumbling. Connect with the guests, and they will connect with your speech.

Keep It Positive

Even if you think it's well-meaning, don't turn your toast into a roast or make jokes at the couple's expense. Keep things light and positive, and avoid any topics that could be embarrassing or too private.

Don't Wing It

While it may be tempting to wing your speech, especially if you're naturally charismatic, it's always a good idea to prepare your remarks in advance. Practise your speech multiple times to familiarise yourself with the content, timing, and flow. This will help you refine your delivery and ensure your special tribute goes off without a hitch.

Share stories about the groom

Sharing stories about the groom is a great way to keep your speech entertaining and engaging for your audience. It's also a chance for guests to learn more about the groom and your relationship with him. Here are some tips and ideas for this section of your best man speech:

Choose the Right Stories

Select stories that highlight the groom's character and provide insights into your relationship. These can be playful and humorous, but always keep them friendly and respectful. Avoid stories that are too embarrassing or private, or cast the groom in a negative light. Instead, opt for anecdotes that showcase his positive qualities, such as loyalty, compassion, or a good sense of humour. For example, you could share a story about a fishing trip where the groom accidentally caught his jacket and fell overboard, demonstrating his ability to laugh at himself and make the best of any situation.

Involve Mutual Friends

If you're struggling to think of stories, consider asking mutual friends. They may have some great tales to tell that you might not remember. By involving mutual friends, you can also create a sense of inclusion and make your speech more relatable for the audience.

Include a Variety of Stories

Mix up your story selection by including fun and happy memories from different stages of the groom's life. If you knew him in school, share some childhood stories or anecdotes from your time together as students. Were there any silly reasons he always ended up in detention? Did he stick up for you against bullies? These stories will add depth to your speech and provide a well-rounded picture of the groom's personality.

Use Props and Visual Aids

To enhance your storytelling, consider using props or visual aids. Create a slideshow of photos, including childhood images and recent funny shots. If the groom is known for always wearing the same outfit or doing the same pose in pictures, gather photographic evidence to entertain your audience. You can also write a humorous poem, song, or rap, or even present a mock school report or CV with ridiculous achievements.

Keep it Authentic

Stay true to yourself and your usual demeanour when delivering the speech. If you're not known as the comedian among your friends, don't feel pressured to crack a series of jokes. Sentimentality may not be your style either, and that's okay. Keeping your speech light and straightforward is perfectly acceptable. Your authenticity will resonate more genuinely with the newlyweds and their guests, making your speech more impactful and memorable.

Include a toast to the couple

The best man's speech is a chance to honour the couple and celebrate their love. It's also an opportunity to share some kind words about your relationship with the groom and your friend.

The best man's speech traditionally ends with a toast to the couple. This is your chance to offer some sincere well-wishes for their future together. You can also invite the guests to raise their glasses and join you in this heartfelt sentiment.

"To [Groom's Name] and [Partner's Name], may your journey together be filled with endless joy and adventure. May you face every challenge with the same courage and love that brought you here today. Let's raise our glasses to the newlyweds, to love, laughter, and happily ever after!"

"All that remains for me is to wish you all a long and happy life together, with all the luck in the world. Ladies and gentlemen, the bride and groom."

"I hope you have a great day today and enjoy a long and happy life together. Here's to the happy couple!"

"I am so happy that you've found each other to share your lives with and all that remains for me to say is that I hope you have a great day today and enjoy a long and happy life together."

"I raise my glass to you both and wish you a lifetime of happiness together."

Keep the toast short and sincere, and don't forget to invite the guests to raise their glasses!

Rehearse and relax

Now that you've crafted your speech, it's time to prepare for the big day. Rehearsing your speech is crucial to ensure a confident and polished delivery. Here are some tips to help you rehearse and relax before delivering your best man speech:

Practice, Practice, Practice

The key to a successful speech is practice. Rehearse your speech multiple times to familiarise yourself with the content, timing, and flow. Practise in front of a mirror or with a trusted friend to refine your delivery and body language. The more you practise, the more confident you'll become. Remember to use hand gestures and maintain eye contact with the audience to keep them engaged.

Calming Nerves

It's natural to feel nervous before delivering your speech. To calm your nerves, deep breathing techniques can help slow you down and relax your mind. Visualisation is also a powerful tool – imagine yourself as a confident speaker who is captivating the audience. If you're comfortable, having a drink or two beforehand can take the edge off, but be careful not to overindulge.

Keep it Short and Sweet

Remember, the ideal length for a best man speech is around 3 to 7 minutes. Guests will appreciate a concise and engaging speech, so aim to keep it within this timeframe. Practising your speech will help you perfect the timing and ensure you don't ramble.

Connect with the Audience

While your speech is primarily for the couple, it's also essential to connect with the guests. Make sure to maintain eye contact, speak clearly, and use hand gestures to emphasise your points. Your speech will have more impact if the audience feels involved and engaged.

Be Yourself

Stay true to your personality during your speech. If you're not typically the class clown, don't feel pressured to cram your speech with jokes. Be yourself, and your authenticity will shine through. Your friends and the couple already know and love your unique personality, so embrace it!

Final Thoughts

In conclusion, rehearsing your best man speech and managing your nerves are crucial steps to ensure a successful delivery. Remember to practise, stay true to yourself, and connect with the audience. With these tips in mind, you'll be well on your way to delivering a memorable and well-received speech. Good luck and happy wedding!

Frequently asked questions