The Best Man's Guide: Duties And Responsibilities

The best man is the groom's right-hand man and chief assistant before, during, and after the wedding. The role is typically given to the groom's best friend or a close relative. The best man's responsibilities include planning the bachelor party, helping the groom choose his wedding outfit, keeping the wedding rings safe, standing next to the groom during the ceremony, signing the marriage license, and delivering a memorable speech. He is also in charge of the groomsmen and leads all communication and coordination of their activities and duties.

Planning the bachelor party

Discuss the Budget:

Start by having an open conversation with the groom about his budget and expectations for the party. It's important to be realistic and ensure that everyone invited to the party is on the same page financially. A great bachelor party doesn't have to be expensive; there are plenty of budget-friendly options that can be just as fun.

Choose the Location and Activities:

When selecting a location, consider the groom's interests and the group's dynamics. It could be a weekend trip to a fun city like Vegas, or a more relaxed getaway like a fishing trip. The key is to create an experience that the groom will love and remember forever. Think about activities that the groom enjoys, and try to incorporate a variety of options to suit different tastes.

Invite the Guests:

Work with the groom to create a guest list for the bachelor party. This may include the groomsmen, close friends, and family members. Make sure to get their availability and send out invitations with plenty of notice.

Handle the Logistics:

As the best man, you'll be in charge of organizing the transportation, accommodations, and any other necessary arrangements for the party. This includes booking venues, coordinating travel plans, and ensuring that everyone has the information they need.

Keep it Safe and Fun:

Remember, your role as the best man is to support the groom and ensure his happiness and well-being. The bachelor party should be a fun and positive experience. Avoid any activities that could jeopardize relationships or cause embarrassment. It's also a good idea to stay sober or at least sober enough to make sure the groom gets to the wedding on time and in good shape!

Get Creative:

A bachelor party is a chance to celebrate the groom's unique personality and interests. Think outside the box and plan something that suits his style. It could be a themed party, an outdoor adventure, or a combination of activities that reflect his hobbies and passions.

Remember to start planning early, communicate regularly with the groom and guests, and don't be afraid to ask for help from the groomsmen or other friends. With careful planning and attention to detail, you'll create an unforgettable bachelor party that the groom and his friends will cherish forever.

Helping the groom get ready

Before the Wedding

As the best man, you will be the groom's right-hand man and chief assistant in the lead-up to the wedding. You will be responsible for helping the groom choose his formal wear and picking the colours for the rest of the groomsmen. It is important to schedule fittings and alterations well in advance to allow time for any necessary adjustments. You will also need to organise the present from the groomsmen and ensure everyone has their attire in time for the wedding.

On the Wedding Day

On the morning of the wedding, your duties will include helping the groom get dressed and making sure he has everything he needs. You will also need to take charge of the wedding rings, ensuring they are secure and easily accessible during the ceremony. It is a good idea to keep them in a dedicated pocket or box and double-check that you have them before leaving for the ceremony.

During the Ceremony

As the best man, you will stand next to the groom during the wedding ceremony, offering support and making sure he has what he needs. This includes handing him the ring when it is time to exchange vows. You will also be responsible for signing the marriage license as a witness.

After the Ceremony

Once the ceremony is over, you may be expected to drive the couple to the reception or help with any last-minute tasks, such as decorating the getaway car. You will also need to assist the photographer in getting everyone together for formal pictures.

Holding the rings

Firstly, the best man should designate a secure place to store the rings, such as a dedicated pocket or a small box. It is advisable to double and triple-check that the rings are in their designated place before leaving for the ceremony, and to continue checking throughout the day. This vigilant approach will help to avoid any last-minute panics.

Secondly, the best man should be aware of when the rings will be needed during the ceremony. Usually, the ring bearer will carry the rings down the aisle on a pillow, and the best man will fasten the rings to the pillow as they line up for the processional. When the ring bearer reaches the end of the aisle, the best man will receive the rings back for safekeeping until the officiant requests them. Being clear on the timing of this exchange will help to ensure a smooth process.

Additionally, the best man should be mindful of the ring bearer's age and maturity. If the ring bearer is very young, the best man may want to keep the rings until the ceremony to avoid any mishaps. In this case, the best man can discreetly slip the ring onto his little finger, ensuring it can be easily and quickly removed when needed.

Finally, the best man should be aware of any other ring-related responsibilities, such as ensuring the groom's wedding band is accessible if the groom needs to remove it and safekeeping the bride's ring until it is placed on her finger. Overall, the best man's role in holding the rings is crucial to the smooth running of the wedding ceremony, and careful planning and attention to detail will help ensure success.

Signing the marriage certificate

The best man has a lot of responsibilities on the day of the wedding, from making sure the groom is ready to ensuring the wedding goes according to plan. One of the most important duties of the best man is to sign the marriage certificate as a witness, along with the maid of honour. Here is a detailed breakdown of this responsibility:

The marriage certificate is a crucial document that officially recognises the couple's marriage. The best man's signature on this document, along with that of the maid of honour, serves as a legal witness to the wedding ceremony. This usually takes place right after the wedding ceremony, but sometimes it is signed before. The best man should be prepared with a backup pen in case of any last-minute mishaps. It is also essential to ensure that the marriage license is signed by the couple, as without it, the marriage is not legally valid.

After the signing, the best man hands the officiant a sealed envelope containing their fee. The officiant then sends the marriage license to the relevant authority, and the couple receives their official marriage certificate. This step is important for the legal recognition of the marriage and finalises the wedding process.

Other Responsibilities

In addition to signing the marriage certificate, the best man has several other duties on the wedding day. These include:

• Keeping the wedding rings safe until the couple exchanges them
• Standing next to the groom during the ceremony, providing emotional support and ensuring the groom has everything needed
• Delivering the best man's speech, usually after the father-of-the-bride speech
• Ensuring the groom eats, drinks and stays hydrated throughout the day
• Helping to organise wedding photographs and coordinating with guests and vendors
• Acting as a master of ceremonies and making announcements if needed
• Decorating the getaway car, along with the other groomsmen
• Returning hired items, such as suits, and taking care of any post-wedding tasks

Giving a speech

Preparation

Start working on your speech well in advance. The more you prepare, the more confident you will feel. Include personal anecdotes and stories that highlight your friendship with the groom. Express your gratitude for being chosen to be part of this special day, and offer sincere well-wishes to the newlyweds.

Structure

A good formula for the speech is to open with a funny or poignant anecdote, then express your gratitude and admiration for the groom and couple, and close with a meaningful toast. Having a clear beginning, middle, and end will help keep your speech focused and engaging.

Content

The best speeches are personal and specific. Share stories that illustrate what makes the groom such an amazing person and friend. You can also talk about all the fun times you've had together, and even mention an embarrassing moment.

Practice

The key to a great speech is practice. The more comfortable you are with the material, the more confident and natural you will sound. Stand in front of a mirror, record yourself, or practice with a trusted friend. Pay attention to your pacing, tone, and body language.

Delivery

Remember to breathe, make eye contact with friendly faces in the crowd, and speak slowly and clearly. Your genuine emotion and enthusiasm will shine through and connect with the audience.

Public Speaking Tips

If public speaking makes you nervous, there are some techniques you can use to help calm your nerves. Take deep breaths, make eye contact, and smile. Remember, the audience is on your side and wants you to succeed.

Length

Keep your speech concise and to the point. A speech that is 1-2 minutes long is usually sufficient.

Jokes

It is okay to include a joke or two in your speech, but be careful not to offend anyone. Keep the jokes light and good-natured, and make sure they are appropriate for all ages.

Remember, the most important thing is to be yourself and speak from the heart. The groom chose you as his best man because of your special connection, so let that shine through in your speech.

Frequently asked questions