Wedding Objections: What's Next?

The phrase speak now or forever hold your peace is an uncommon part of modern wedding ceremonies. However, if someone does object, the officiant may pause the ceremony and ask the objector to explain their reasons privately. Unless there is a valid legal reason for the objection, the ceremony will likely continue as planned. In the rare case that someone does object, it is usually done in a joking manner.

The officiant pauses the ceremony

If there is an objection during the wedding ceremony, it is up to the officiant to decide how to proceed. The officiant may pause the ceremony to handle the objection. Here are some possible steps that the officiant could take:

• Taking a brief pause: The officiant may need a moment to decide how to handle the objection and whether to halt the ceremony or continue.
• Assessing the objection's validity: The officiant should determine if the objection has any legal merit. Wedding objections are intended to address legal issues, not emotional ones. Unless there is a substantial legal reason, the ceremony can continue.
• Handling the objection privately: If the officiant chooses to halt the ceremony, they can escort the objector to another room to discuss the objection privately. This allows the officiant to understand the objection's nature and validity.
• Involving the couple: Depending on the nature of the objection, the officiant may involve the couple in the private discussion. This gives the couple an opportunity to address the objection and decide on the next steps.
• Resuming the ceremony: If the objection is minor or without legal standing, the officiant may choose to ignore it and continue with the ceremony. Alternatively, after handling the objection privately, the officiant can resume the ceremony, especially if the couple is comfortable proceeding.
• Dealing with the objector's presence: If the objector refuses to move on or continues to disrupt the ceremony, the officiant or other guests may need to intervene. This could involve asking the objector to leave or having someone escort them out, ensuring the ceremony can continue without further interruptions.

It is important to note that wedding objections are rare, and most officiants rarely include the "speak now or forever hold your peace" phrase in modern wedding ceremonies. However, if there are concerns about potential objections, the couple can discuss tactics with the officiant beforehand and carefully consider their guest list.

The couple talk privately with the objector

If the couple decides to talk privately with the objector, the first step is to take them to a private area where they can discuss the objector's concerns. The couple can then express their appreciation for the objector's concerns, but also reinforce their commitment to their partner and their decision to get married. A response along the lines of "We appreciate you sharing your concerns, but we feel differently" is appropriate. The couple is not obligated to justify their decision to get married.

If the objector is not willing to move on, the couple may have to ask them to leave the ceremony. It is important to handle the situation with extreme care and to keep the conversation private to avoid inflaming the already precarious scenario. Once the private discussion is over, the couple can return to the ceremony and the officiant can make a brief apology for the interruption, without providing any additional details.

It is worth noting that wedding objections are rare and mostly happen in a joking manner. They are also no longer legally binding as any potential issues would have come to light when the couple was securing their marriage license.

The officiant makes light of the objection

If you're an officiant and someone objects to the marriage, you could make light of the situation and downplay it. Here are some ways to do that:

• Make a joke about the objection, perhaps saying something like, "If someone objects to this wedding, speak now or forever hold your peace—except for Aunt Trudie."
• Briefly acknowledge the objection and then quickly move on with the ceremony.
• Assume that the couple's loved ones will intervene and help to remove the cause of the disruption.
• Make sure the couple is okay and try not to draw any more attention to what just took place.

It's important to note that the officiant should also check in with the couple to ensure they are alright and want to continue with the ceremony.

The objector is removed from the ceremony

If the objector is removed from the ceremony, it is likely that the officiant will have a private conversation with them to understand the reason for their objection. This is especially important if the objection is based on a legal issue, such as one of the parties being forced into the marriage, or if they are already married or closely related to someone else. In such cases, the officiant would need to halt the ceremony and discuss the matter with the couple to decide on the best course of action.

However, if the objection is not based on a legal issue, the officiant may choose to simply ignore it and continue with the ceremony. In this case, the wedding guests can encourage the objector to leave, or the officiant may make light of the situation to ease any tension and proceed with the wedding.

It is worth noting that objections during wedding ceremonies are very uncommon, and there are no official rules on how to handle them. Ultimately, the decision on how to handle the objector and whether to continue with the ceremony lies with the couple and the officiant.

The officiant ignores the objection

If the officiant decides to ignore the objection, the wedding guests will usually deal with the objector, encouraging them to leave. However, this is not without its challenges. The officiant must be prepared to think on their feet and be able to move on from the interruption without drawing more attention to the objector.

In the case of an objection, the officiant has a few options. Firstly, they could pause the ceremony and take the objector to another room to discuss their reasons privately. This would allow the officiant to assess the validity of the objection and decide on the best course of action. If the objection is not valid, the officiant can choose to ignore it and proceed with the ceremony.

Alternatively, if the officiant chooses to ignore the objection, they should be prepared to deal with any potential fallout. The objector may continue to interrupt the ceremony or cause a scene, which could be disruptive and embarrassing for the couple. In this case, the officiant or other guests may need to intervene and ask the objector to leave.

It is important to note that objections during wedding ceremonies are rare and that there are no official rules outlining what an officiant should do in this situation. However, if an objection does occur, the officiant must act quickly and decisively to minimise any disruption and ensure the couple's wedding proceeds as smoothly as possible.

To prepare for any potential objections, the officiant may wish to discuss tactics with the couple beforehand. This could include deciding on a signal or code word that indicates the couple wishes to proceed with the ceremony, despite the objection. Additionally, the officiant could use humour to diffuse the tension and move on from the interruption.

Ultimately, the decision to ignore an objection rests with the officiant and the couple. By remaining calm and decisive, they can ensure the ceremony continues with minimal disruption.

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