Weddings: A Day Of Love, Laughter, And Tears

A wedding is a ceremony where two people are united in marriage, and wedding traditions vary across different cultures, religions, and countries. In Western weddings, the processional is usually when the bridesmaids and groomsmen walk down the aisle, followed by the maid of honour and best man, and then the ring bearer and flower girl. The bride is the last to make her entrance, traditionally escorted by her father. Once everyone is in place, the officiant will give a speech, and there may be readings from guests. The couple then exchange vows and rings, before sealing the deal with a kiss. The officiant will then pronounce the couple as married, and there may be a unity ceremony, such as lighting a candle or mixing sand. The newlyweds then lead the recessional, followed by the wedding party and guests. After the ceremony, there is often a reception with food, drinks, music, and dancing.

The Processional

The Officiant

The officiant is the first to make their way up to the altar and stand there while the rest of the processional takes place. The officiant can be a friend, family member, or ordained individual chosen by the couple.

The Groom's Processional

The groom is usually the next to enter the ceremony space, often from the side of the venue, close to the right side of the altar. In some traditions, like Jewish weddings, the groom is escorted down the aisle by his parents. In Catholic weddings, the priest, groom, and best man enter together from the side.

The Groomsmen

The groomsmen are the groom's attendants and they walk down the aisle after him. They can walk in pairs or individually, with the best man being the last to walk down before the bridesmaids.

The Bridesmaids

The bridesmaids are the bride's attendants and they walk down the aisle after the groomsmen. Like the groomsmen, they can walk in pairs or individually, with the maid of honor being the last to walk down before the flower girl and ring bearer.

The Flower Girl and Ring Bearer

The flower girl and ring bearer are usually children who walk down the aisle together or with the ring bearer preceding the flower girl. The ring bearer carries the wedding rings (sometimes tied to a small pillow), and the flower girl scatters petals along the aisle.

The Bride's Processional

The bride is traditionally escorted down the aisle by her father, who stands to her right. In some cultures, like Jewish weddings, the bride is escorted by both parents. After the father gives the bride away, they may lift her veil, give her a kiss, and take their seats.

The Officiant's Remarks

Begin with a warm welcome to all the guests. You may use traditional phrases such as "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today..." or address the crowd as "Friends and family...". A brief introduction and some context about the couple and their relationship can be included here.

The Significance of Marriage

This is where you, as the officiant, will speak about the importance of marriage and the duties and responsibilities of each partner in the union. You may also choose to include some scripture or religious teachings relevant to the couple's beliefs.

Readings

If there are to be any readings, this is the appropriate time. A few people may be invited to share readings, which can be religious, spiritual, or even excerpts from literature or poetry. These readings should reflect the couple's beliefs and ideas about love and marriage.

Addressing the Couple

Now, turn your attention to the couple and emphasise the weight of the vows they are about to make. You may also want to mention the sanctity of the wedding rings, which will be exchanged soon.

Unity Ceremony

If the couple has chosen to include a unity ceremony, such as lighting a candle or mixing sand, it is usually done after the officiant's remarks and before the exchange of vows.

Closing Remarks

Conclude your remarks with a few uplifting and heartfelt words. If it is a religious ceremony, include a blessing for the couple, wishing them a long and happy marriage.

Remember, while there is a general structure, the couple may choose to personalise their ceremony with unique touches, so be sure to discuss their preferences beforehand.

The Exchange of Vows

During the exchange, the couple stands in front of their family and friends, declaring their intentions and making promises to love, honour, and support each other through life's joys and challenges. The vows are not just words but sacred promises that hold profound meaning and significance. They symbolise the couple's willingness to embark on a lifelong journey together, fostering respect, devoted love, and mutual sacrifice.

The specific format of the vow exchange may vary depending on cultural and religious backgrounds. For instance, in Hindu weddings, couples recite a set of vows known as "saptapadi" or the Seven Steps, walking around a sacred fire to honour the Hindu god of fire. In contrast, Catholic weddings have prescribed vows that cannot be personalised.

Regardless of the specific words or rituals, the exchange of vows is a powerful moment that transforms the relationship between the couple. It is a public declaration of their love and a commitment to build a life together, marking the beginning of their journey as a married couple.

The Ring Exchange

Choosing the Ring Bearer:

The couple decides who will hold and bring the wedding rings during the ceremony. While traditionally, the best man acts as the ring keeper, the couple may choose to involve other people, such as the maid of honour, a family member, or even their pet.

• Timing of the Ring Exchange:
• Ensuring the Rings are Present:

Before the ceremony begins, the wedding officiant should confirm that the designated ring keeper has the rings. This simple yet crucial step ensures that the rings are readily available when needed.

Introducing the Ring Exchange:

The officiant explicitly signals the start of the ring exchange section, such as by saying, "The couple will now exchange rings as a symbol of their love and commitment." This helps guests understand the transition to this meaningful part of the ceremony.

Reflection on the Significance of Rings:

The officiant may share a few words about the symbolism of the wedding rings. This could include reflections on the endless nature of love, the endurance of the metal, or the forging of a bond in the face of life's trials. For example, the officiant might say, "The ring goes round and round and never ends, just like your love for each other."

Inviting the Ring Keeper Forward:

The officiant prompts the ring keeper to come forward and give the ring to the groom or Partner 1. It is advisable to be explicit in this invitation, stating something like, "Chris, can you come forward and bring the ring to Julian?"

Giving the Ring to Partner 1:

The ring keeper gives the ring to the groom or Partner 1. It is recommended that the ring is not kept in a box, as this can cause a delay or accidental dropping of the ring. The ring should be placed firmly into the palm of Partner 1's hand to ensure a smooth and secure exchange.

Placing the Ring on Partner 2's Finger:

Partner 1 then places the ring on Partner 2's finger. This moment is often filled with emotion and may include some fumbling or awkwardness, which is entirely normal and adds a touch of levity to the ceremony.

Words of Commitment:

After the ring is placed on Partner 2's finger, Partner 1 is invited to share a few words of commitment. This could be in the form of traditional phrases like, "I give you this ring as a symbol of my everlasting love," or more personalized vows that reflect the couple's unique relationship.

Repeat for Partner 2:

The same process is repeated for Partner 2, who will place the ring on Partner 1's finger and share their own words of commitment.

Pronouncement as Married:

After the ring exchange, the officiant typically pronounces the couple as married, using phrases like, "I now pronounce you husband and wife." This marks the official beginning of the couple's married life together.

The Pronouncement of Marriage

Ladies and gentlemen, the moment you’ve all been waiting for. After the declaration of marriage, the couple will kiss, and the guests will break into applause.

The officiant will then say their last few words to wrap up the ceremony. In religious weddings, there is often a blessing. The officiant will then introduce the couple as a married couple for the first time.

The newlyweds will then lead the wedding party out in reverse order. If bridesmaids and groomsmen walked in separately, they will still typically escort each other out.

Frequently asked questions