A Hasidic Wedding: Rituals And Customs

A Hasidic Jewish wedding is a vibrant and joyous affair, often with thousands of attendees. For example, a wedding for a well-known Hasidic rabbi's grandson was expected to have 10,000 guests. However, large gatherings like this have faced opposition from authorities due to concerns about violating coronavirus restrictions. Despite tensions and restrictions, the Hasidic community continues to celebrate marriages with grandeur and tradition, with previous weddings drawing thousands of attendees.

Guest numbers: how many people are invited

Guest numbers at Hasidic Jewish weddings can vary, but they are often large events with thousands of attendees. For example, a 2020 Hasidic wedding in Brooklyn was reported to have had thousands of guests in attendance, with another wedding by the Satmar sect of Hasidic Judaism in the same year drawing 10,000 guests.

However, the size of the guest list will depend on the specific community and family involved, and not all Hasidic weddings are so large. The COVID-19 pandemic also impacted the number of guests at weddings during this time, with authorities limiting the number of attendees at some events.

In terms of who is invited to a Hasidic Jewish wedding, the guest list typically includes close family members, friends, and members of the local community. It is customary for the couple to be surrounded by loved ones and well-wishers on their special day. The wedding is considered a serious religious event, followed by celebrations with dancing, singing, and a festive meal.

In some cases, there may be separate receptions for men and women, with the bride celebrating with the women and the groom with the men. This separation of guests by gender is a unique aspect of Hasidic weddings, allowing the bride and groom to celebrate with their respective genders.

Overall, while the exact number of guests at a Hasidic Jewish wedding can vary, these events often include a large number of attendees to celebrate the union of the couple and mark the beginning of their new life together.

The ceremony

The wedding ceremony is a significant event in the Hasidic Jewish community, often attracting a large number of guests. For instance, a wedding in New York was expected to have 10,000 attendees, including the family, friends, and members of the community. However, due to coronavirus infection concerns, the authorities had to intervene and restrict the gathering. This incident highlights the importance and scale of Hasidic Jewish wedding ceremonies.

Hasidic Jewish weddings follow traditional Jewish wedding customs and rituals. The ceremony is steeped in symbolism and is a sacred event that binds the couple together in a covenant with God. The wedding ceremony takes place under a chuppah, a wedding canopy that represents the couple's new home and symbolises God's presence. The chuppah is often beautifully decorated, and the couple stands under it during the ceremony.

During the ceremony, the rabbi, a respected religious leader, presides over the rituals and recites blessings and prayers. The wedding ceremony includes several meaningful traditions, such as the signing of the ketubah, which is the wedding contract, and the exchange of rings, symbolising the couple's commitment to each other. The rituals are accompanied by traditional Jewish wedding music, adding to the solemnity of the occasion.

One of the most important rituals is the Kiddushin, or sanctification, where the couple partakes of wine from a cup or glass, symbolising the sweetness of their new life together. This ritual is often followed by the Sheva Brachot, or Seven Blessings, where the rabbi or selected guests recite blessings for the couple, wishing them joy, love, and a fruitful life together. These blessings are an integral part of the ceremony, bringing spiritual significance and divine favour upon the marriage.

Food and drink

Before the Ceremony

At a traditional kabbalat panim, the bride and groom sit in separate rooms and guests greet them and enjoy light refreshments. Some brides and grooms fast on their wedding day until after the ceremony, so it is considered polite to refrain from offering them food and drink.

During the Ceremony

The wedding ceremony includes a blessing over a cup of wine, which is then shared between the couple and sometimes their parents. The couple also exchange rings, which are traditionally plain wedding bands made of solid gold, silver, or platinum.

After the Ceremony

Following the ceremony, the couple may proceed to a private room for yichud, or seclusion, where they will share their first meal together as a married couple. This meal differs from community to community and can range from "golden soup" to chocolate chip cookies.

The wedding feast is a time for guests to bring joy and festivities to the couple. Lively circle dancing, known as the hora, usually starts immediately when the bride and groom enter the party room. At more traditional weddings, there are separate dances for men and women, while in more liberal crowds, men and women dance together.

The meal begins with bread, and there is a specific way to wash your hands and a blessing to say before eating.

If the wedding is a Chabad or non-chassidic wedding, the meal will likely include "golden" chicken soup, which gets its name from the circles of molten chicken fat that float on its surface.

If the wedding is a more traditional Ashkenazi affair, the meal may include stuffed cabbage, known as holishkes, or a variety of meat dishes such as braised meats and root vegetables.

If the wedding is Sephardi or Mizrahi, the meal will likely emphasize salads, stuffed vegetables, olive oil, lentils, fresh and dried fruits, herbs, nuts, and chickpeas.

After the Meal

After the meal, Birkat Hamazon (Grace after meals) is recited, followed by sheva brachot. At a wedding banquet, an enhanced version of the call to Birkat Hamazon is used, including (in Ashkenazic communities) the first stanza of Devai Haser. Prayer booklets called bentshers may be handed out to guests. After the prayers, the blessing over the wine is recited, with two glasses of wine poured together into a third, symbolising the creation of a new life together.

Music and dancing

The wedding ceremony is held under a canopy called a chuppah, with the open sky above the couple. Music is played and sung as the bride is walked to the chuppah, and her parents and grandparents circle the groom seven times. A slow, moving melody, or niggun, is played before the groom recites a maamar, a chassidic discourse, in Yiddish, Hebrew, or English. This is followed by a fast-paced, joyous melody. Short speeches are also interspersed with singing.

The Horah, a Jewish circle dance, is typically danced to the music of Hava Nagila and is often performed at weddings. The Tza'ad Temani, a form of dance based on hopping in place, is also frequently incorporated into the public dancing at weddings.

After the wedding feast, the Mitzvah tantz, a Hasidic custom, takes place. The men dance before the bride, who usually stands still at one end of the room, holding one end of a long sash while the person dancing before her holds the other end. The dancer silently prays for the couple's success in life. The dance is an emotional moment and is considered a great honour. The groom and his male relatives are often hoisted onto the shoulders of other dancers or lifted onto a table or chair, while everyone dances around in concentric circles.

Wedding outfits

The wedding outfits of a Hasidic Jewish bride and groom are pretty standard, with a few traditional accessories and touches.

Grooms wear a skullcap called a "kippah" or "yarmulke" with their wedding suit. The suit is usually a standard European design. However, during the ceremony, the groom may wear a white robe called a "kittel" or a prayer shawl called a "tallit", which he removes later.

Brides wear white dresses, but the outfit must be "kosher", complying with religious traditions and rules. The dress is modest, with a neckline that is not too low, covered shoulders, and sleeves that cover the elbows or are full-length. The skirt is ankle-length, and modern brides may wear a jacket over a dress that reveals their upper body. The veil is an obligatory accessory.

At an Orthodox Jewish wedding, women tend to wear polished makeup, nails, and hair, with muted lipstick colours and subtle jewellery. They rarely wear trousers to formal events, so a woman in a pantsuit would stand out. Men usually wear suits and ties.

In some Hasidic communities, men cover their heads with hats or a "shtreimel", a type of fur hat. They also wear black suits and a "tzitzit", a four-pointed garment with fringes on the corners, underneath their shirts.

Married observant Jewish women cover their hair with a scarf, snood, hat, beret, or a wig, to conform with the requirement of Jewish religious law. In some ultra-Orthodox communities, women are discouraged from wearing bright, attention-getting colours.

Frequently asked questions