Best Man's Wedding Mishap

The role of the best man at a wedding is an important one, and it is considered a great honour to be selected. The best man is usually the groom's closest friend or relative, and is responsible for a variety of tasks before, during, and after the wedding. These include organising the stag do, writing a speech, assisting with suit choices, and keeping the wedding rings safe. In some cultures, the best man has more specific roles, such as leading processions in Zambia, guiding the newlyweds in Uganda, or guarding the bride in Ukraine. The history of the best man is rooted in the practice of bride kidnapping, where the best man would assist the groom in capturing the bride.

The Best Man's Speech

The speech is often the part of the role that the best man may be dreading, but it is also an opportunity to poke fun at the groom and share some embarrassing stories. It is traditionally light-hearted and comical, designed to embarrass the groom in front of the wedding guests. However, it should ultimately be a celebration of the couple and their relationship.

The best man should also be prepared to step in and emcee if there are any last-minute issues with the DJ or band. He should be ready to crack some jokes, get the crowd onto the dance floor, and introduce the key players to keep the party going as planned.

In some cultures, the best man's duties and speech may vary. For example, in Zambia, the best man leads processions at the wedding and preliminary events, and is expected to give an outstanding and outlandish dance performance. In Uganda, the best man is to guide the newlyweds in the ways of marriage, so it is ideal for him to be married himself. In Bhutan, the best man presents himself as a ceremonial guardian to the couple and entertains the guests, sometimes for several hours.

Bachelor Party Planning

Planning a bachelor party can be a daunting task, but with the right approach, it can be a fun and memorable experience for everyone involved. Here are some detailed tips to help you plan an awesome bachelor party:

Choose the Right Time and Location:

Start by picking a date that works for the groom and the majority of the invitees. Ideally, the bachelor party should take place one to three months before the wedding. As for the location, consider the groom's preferences and the type of activities you want to include. It could be a chilled-out evening at home, a local bar hangout, or a trip to a new city or tropical destination.

Finalize the Guest List:

The guest list typically includes the groomsmen and the groom's close male friends and family members. It's important to get the groom's sign-off on the guest list and ensure that all invitees can attend.

Discuss the Budget:

Talk to your guests about their budget constraints and what they are willing to spend on travel, accommodations, and activities. The groom's expenses are usually covered by the attendees, so factor that into the budget as well.

Pick a Theme:

Decide on a theme or party style that aligns with the groom's interests and the group's dynamics. It could be an adventure-packed weekend trip, a night of bar-hopping, a sporting event, or a relaxed evening at home.

Book Travel and Accommodations:

Start booking your travel and accommodations three to four months in advance. Get confirmation from everyone in the group to avoid any last-minute surprises. Consider renting a house instead of hotel rooms for a more intimate gathering and cost-effective option.

Plan the Activities:

Bachelor parties are about creating lasting memories and bonding with the groom. Plan a mix of activities that the groom enjoys, such as golfing, camping, attending a sporting event, or going to a brewery tour. Don't forget to include some downtime in the schedule as well.

Finalize the Itinerary:

About a month before the party, confirm the final guest count and create a detailed itinerary. Share the timeline, hotel information, arrival times, and contact details with the group. This will ensure everyone is on the same page and can make the necessary arrangements.

Pack and Prepare:

Start packing and preparing any decorations, party favours, or supplies you might need for the bachelor party. If you're the host, plan to arrive earlier than the guests to handle any last-minute setup or preparations.

The Day of the Party:

As the host or best man, your role is to ensure the groom and guests are having a great time. Make sure everyone sticks to the schedule, and don't forget to capture plenty of photos and videos to commemorate the occasion.

Post-Party Follow-up:

After the party, send thank-you notes to the group, especially if travel was involved. Follow up on any outstanding expenses and make sure everyone has settled their share.

Ring Bearer

The ring bearer is a cherished and adorable part of any wedding ceremony. They are usually young boys aged between three and eight, but this is not a strict rule. The role can be performed by a girl, an adult, or even a pet. The ring bearer is often a close relative or friend of the couple, such as a niece, nephew, or child of a close friend.

The ring bearer has one of the most important jobs in the wedding ceremony. They are responsible for carrying the couple's wedding rings down the aisle and presenting them to the bride and groom during the ceremony. This role is symbolic, adding a touch of innocence and charm to the wedding. As the rings represent the couple's commitment to each other, entrusting a young child with this responsibility symbolizes their hope for a bright and joyful future together.

The ring bearer should attend the wedding rehearsal and any pre-wedding events to become familiar with their role and the wedding party members. They should also try on their outfit and practice walking down the aisle with the ring pillow, which can be made more fun by using a decorative pillow or even a briefcase labelled 'Ring Security'.

On the wedding day, the ring bearer walks down the aisle, usually ahead of the flower girl and immediately before the bride. They walk slowly and confidently, carrying the ring pillow with the wedding rings attached. Once at the altar, the ring bearer presents the rings to the best man or the couple when it is time to exchange rings. After presenting the rings, the ring bearer will typically stand with the wedding party for the duration of the ceremony, or they may be seated with their parents if they are too young to stand for an extended period.

Wedding Attire

The best man's suit or tuxedo should be one step removed from the groom's. For example, if the groom is wearing a white dinner jacket, the best man should wear black. If the groom is wearing a double-breasted coat, the best man should opt for a single-breasted style. The key is continuity—the best man's outfit should be like a younger sibling to the groom's and should also match the groomsmen's suits, albeit with differing details.

The best man is usually responsible for helping the groom and groomsmen choose their wedding attire. The best man's attire can be chosen on the same day and from the same tailor as the groom's, or the best man can share the details of their suit with their tailor to ensure a complementary look.

• Black Tie: The best man can wear a black tuxedo, a black bow tie, and a white tuxedo shirt. To personalise the look, consider adding accessories like a pocket square, suspenders, or button studs.
• Black Tie Optional: The best man can opt for a black tux or a midnight blue tuxedo. A black and white satin bow tie or necktie and a white tux shirt or dress shirt are recommended.
• Creative Black Tie: This dress code allows for more flexibility. The best man can choose a white dinner jacket tuxedo with a white tux shirt or dress shirt and accessorise with cufflinks, a pocket square, and patent leather shoes or velvet loafers.
• Cocktail Attire: A medium-dark suit, such as a navy or blue suit, is recommended. The best man can add a punchier necktie, a unique pocket square, or statement shoes to showcase more personality.
• Casual Attire: Although "casual" can be confusing, it typically means dress pants and a blazer at a minimum. A suit with a dress shirt and dress shoes is preferable.

In addition to attire, the best man also has other important duties, such as planning the bachelor party, serving as a point of contact for the groom's side, and providing emotional support to the groom.

The Groom's Right Hand

The role of the best man is to be the groom's right-hand man, supporting him before, during, and after the wedding. The groom usually chooses a close friend or relative to be his best man, and it is considered a great honour to be selected.

In the lead-up to the wedding, the best man is typically in charge of planning the bachelor party and acting as a point of contact for the groom's side of the wedding party. He may also be involved in choosing the groom's attire and that of the groomsmen, as well as collecting money from the groomsmen to purchase a gift for the groom.

On the wedding day, the best man's duties include holding the wedding rings, ensuring the groom and groomsmen are where they need to be on time, and welcoming guests. He also acts as a legal witness to the marriage and signs the marriage certificate.

The best man is expected to give a well-crafted speech during the reception, focusing on the newlyweds and their love story. He is also expected to dance with the maid of honour and ensure all guests are having a good time.

After the wedding, the best man may be tasked with returning hired items, such as suits, and decorating the newlyweds' car. He may also be responsible for settling any outstanding payments to vendors.

In some cultures, the best man's role may differ. For example, in Zambia, he leads processions at the wedding and preliminary events, while in Uganda, he is expected to guide the newlyweds in the ways of marriage.

Frequently asked questions