The Best Man's Guide To Uk Wedding Duties

Being the best man at a wedding is a huge honour, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. The best man is the groom's right-hand man and is expected to be a person the groom can rely on in the build-up to the wedding. The best man is typically a close friend or male relative of the groom, but there are no hard and fast rules.

So, what does a best man do? One of the first major tasks is to coordinate the stag do. This involves researching and identifying an appropriate location and activities that the groom will love, as well as coordinating family and friends to attend. The best man should also help the groom with wedding planning tasks, such as choosing the groom's attire and attending suit fittings.

On the wedding day, the best man has several important duties, including delivering a speech, looking after the wedding rings, greeting guests, and coordinating the groomsmen. The best man also has the important job of making sure the groom gets to the ceremony on time and keeping the wedding party to the schedule.

Planning the stag do

Once you have the guest list, create a group chat to bounce ideas around. How long will the stag do be for? A full week, three days, or just a single evening? Will you be going abroad or staying in the UK? Once these things have been agreed upon, put the groom and his interests first. If he's into sports, plan some sports challenges. If he likes wine, go to a vineyard.

Try to organise the stag do to take place one to three months before the wedding. This gives everyone time to recover. Think about ways to personalise the stag do, such as including the best stag party games and funny pranks.

When it comes to getting to your destination, consider how you plan to travel. Will you be driving, getting the train, or flying?

Help choose the groom's wedding suit

As the best man, you'll be the groom's right-hand man and a huge support throughout the wedding planning process. One of your key duties is to help the groom choose his wedding suit. Here are some tips to help you navigate this task:

Discuss the Details

Firstly, you need to establish whether the groom and groomsmen will hire or buy their suits. This decision will be influenced by the couple's preferences, budget, and whether the suits will be worn again. It is worth noting that, in the UK, it is customary for the couple to pay for the bridal party's attire. However, there may be instances where groomsmen are expected to contribute, especially if they have a say in the style and colour. Communicate openly with the groom and the rest of the wedding party to ensure everyone is on the same page.

Plan Ahead

It is recommended to start planning the groom's attire a few months in advance to avoid last-minute stress. Create a timeline and work backwards from the wedding date, setting deadlines for suit fittings and purchases. This will ensure a smooth process and allow for any necessary alterations.

Understand the Couple's Vision

The wedding suit should align with the couple's overall vision for their big day. Discuss the desired style, colour, and level of formality with the groom. Consider the wedding's theme, venue, and season to create a cohesive look. For example, a beach wedding may call for a more casual suit style, while an evening wedding in the colder months could be the perfect opportunity for a sleek velvet tuxedo.

Focus on Fit and Comfort

While style is important, ensuring the groom's suit fits well and is comfortable is paramount. A suit that fits like a glove will boost the groom's confidence and ensure he feels his best on the big day. Encourage the groom to opt for a suit that reflects his personality and makes him feel comfortable, whether he's a traditionalist or wants to add a fun twist.

Round Up the Groomsmen

As the best man, you'll also be responsible for ensuring the groomsmen are suited up and ready to go. Organise suit fittings and ensure everyone is on board with the chosen style and colour. If the couple wants a cohesive look, it's crucial that all groomsmen suits are well-fitted and matching.

Think About Extras

Don't forget the little details that can elevate the groom's look. Accessories like cufflinks, ties, and shoes can add a touch of personality and polish to the overall ensemble. You could also suggest an "emergency kit" with extra cufflinks, ties, and shoe polish for any last-minute touch-ups on the wedding day.

Remember, suit shopping is a special moment to share with the groom. Enjoy this time together and provide support and guidance as you help create a memorable wedding day look.

Organise a gift from the groomsmen

Organising a gift from the groomsmen to the groom is a thoughtful and lovely touch. It is not compulsory, but it is a nice gesture to show the groom you care and have his back. It is also a great opportunity for the best man to get something special for the groom, be it from the bridal party or just from themselves.

Price does not matter here, and something small and sentimental will do. For instance, you could get the groom a nice bottle of whiskey, just to show your appreciation for being so included on his big day. If you are stuck on ideas, there are many articles online with suggestions for groomsmen gifts.

You could also get a gift for the newlyweds, although this is not required. The happy couple will likely buy the best man a gift to thank them for their support and effort during the wedding planning, so it is a nice gesture to reciprocate.

Keep the wedding rings safe

As the best man, you are entrusted with the all-important task of keeping the wedding rings safe. Here are some tips to ensure you don't misplace them:

Before the Wedding

Communication is key. Firstly, check in with the couple and ask them where they would like you to keep the rings. They might have a specific idea in mind, such as a safe or a locked box. It is also a good idea to ask them for any additional instructions, such as whether the rings need to be delivered to a certain location before the ceremony.

On the Wedding Day

Keep the rings with you at all times. Do not let them out of your sight, and be mindful of your pockets—check they don't have holes! It is also a good idea to place the rings on the flat of your hand when presenting them during the ceremony, rather than leaving them in the box. This will make it easier for the nervous couple to handle.

During the Ceremony

Be prepared for your moment in the spotlight! When the time comes, you will be expected to give the rings to the couple at the appropriate time. Be mindful of any cues or instructions given by the couple or the officiant.

After the Ceremony

Once the rings have been exchanged, your main responsibility is complete. However, it is a good idea to check in with the couple and ask if they would like you to keep the rings safe for the rest of the day or if they would like to take over. If you are still in charge of the rings, be sure to keep them secure during any remaining celebrations.

Remember, keeping the wedding rings safe is a huge responsibility, but with proper communication, preparation, and organisation, you will be able to fulfil this duty with ease.

Best man's speech

So, you've been asked to be the best man—congratulations! It's an honour to be chosen, but it's also a big responsibility. One of your most important duties is to write and deliver a fantastic, fitting best man's speech. Here are some tips to help you craft the perfect speech and perform it with confidence.

Planning the Speech:

Before you start writing, it's essential to understand the purpose and tone of the best man's speech. This speech is usually expected to be funny and entertaining, with anecdotes and jokes about the groom. However, it can also include thoughtful and profound moments. It's a chance to talk about your relationship with the groom and celebrate his journey into married life.

When planning your speech, consider the following:

• Keep it appropriate for a family audience. While a few risqué jokes at the groom's expense are expected, avoid explicit content or controversy.
• Include a mix of humour and heartfelt moments. Start with an ice-breaker, then move on to anecdotes, jokes, and serious points before ending with a final toast.
• Prepare and practice. Don't leave your speech to the last minute. Write it down, practice delivering it, and time yourself to ensure it's not too long.
• If there are two best men, work together. Having someone to bounce ideas off can make the speech even better.

Delivering the Speech:

On the big day, it's normal to feel nervous, but here are some tips to help you deliver your speech with confidence:

• Keep your alcohol intake minimal before the speech. A drink or two is fine to calm your nerves, but don't overindulge, or you might regret it later.
• Speak slowly, clearly, and confidently. Take your time and make sure your speech is easy for the guests to understand.
• Remember your audience. While the speech is about the groom, it's also about celebrating the couple. Be sure to comment on how great they are together and how perfect they are for each other.
• Read out messages and telegrams. This is a nice touch and can include well wishes from guests who couldn't attend or even messages from the couple's favourite celebrities.

Other Best Man Duties:

While the speech is a significant part of your role, the best man has many other duties before and during the wedding:

• Planning an epic stag do: This is often one of the first tasks, and it's important to plan early. Choose a date and location, consider the groom's interests, and create a group chat to coordinate with the guests.
• Helping with wedding planning: This includes attending suit fittings, collecting and returning suits, organising a gift for the groom, and assisting with greeting guests and coordinating group photos.
• Looking after the wedding rings: This is a huge responsibility, so don't lose them!
• Supporting the groom: Be there for the groom throughout the process. Offer a listening ear, help him stay calm, and check in regularly, especially in the final weeks leading up to the wedding.

Remember, being chosen as the best man is a privilege, and your duties are essential to making the groom's day special. So, have fun, stay organised, and enjoy the experience!

Frequently asked questions