Bridesmaids' Duties: What Are They Responsible For?

Bridesmaids are an important part of the wedding party, and their duties can vary depending on the bride's expectations and cultural context. In Western weddings, bridesmaids are typically responsible for providing emotional support to the bride, attending pre-wedding events, and assisting with wedding planning and logistics. They may also be expected to pay for their attire, travel expenses, and contribute to bridal shower and bachelorette party costs. On the wedding day, bridesmaids ensure the bride is ready and assist with any last-minute tasks. While the role entails a range of responsibilities, the key aspect is being a supportive friend to the bride throughout the wedding journey.

Emotional support

Being emotionally supportive can also mean helping the bride choose her wedding attire and providing feedback and opinions during appointments. Bridesmaids can also be there for the bride on the wedding day itself, helping to calm her nerves and ensure she looks and feels her best. This might include helping her get ready, making sure she eats and stays hydrated, and providing tissues or an encouraging smile during the ceremony. Bridesmaids can also be on hand to assist with any outfit changes or bathroom breaks throughout the day.

In addition to supporting the bride, bridesmaids can also play a role in managing family dynamics or friend drama. This could involve refraining from complaining about any aspects of the wedding planning process that they are unhappy with, in order to keep tensions low. Bridesmaids can also be a sounding board for the bride, listening to any complaints or frustrations she may have without judgement.

Overall, being emotionally supportive is a crucial aspect of being a bridesmaid, and it involves being present, available, and flexible throughout the entire wedding planning process and beyond.

Pre-wedding events

Bridesmaids are typically the bride's closest friends and family members, and their role is significant throughout the planning process and the wedding day. Here are some of the pre-wedding events and activities that bridesmaids are usually in charge of:

Engagement Party

Engagement parties are often one of the first pre-wedding events, hosted by the couple's families or friends to celebrate the couple's upcoming nuptials. While not mandatory, many couples choose to have one, and bridesmaids are expected to attend.

Bridal Shower

The bridal shower is a party to honour the bride, usually hosted by the maid of honour and bridesmaids. It typically includes games, food, and gift-giving. Bridesmaids are expected to help plan and pay for the bridal shower, as well as attend. They may also be tasked with keeping a record of gifts to facilitate the bride's thank-you notes.

Bachelorette Party

The bachelorette party is another key pre-wedding event for bridesmaids. They are expected to help plan and pay for the party, which is led by the maid of honour. The event usually takes place a few months before the wedding and can be a trip or a night out, depending on the bride's preferences and the group's budget.

Bridal Brunch/Bridesmaids Luncheon

The bridal brunch or bridesmaids luncheon is an intimate gathering for the bridal party, usually hosted by the bride a few days before the wedding. It is an opportunity for the bride to thank the bridesmaids and present them with gifts.

Rehearsal Dinner

The rehearsal dinner is a gathering for the wedding party and families to get acquainted. It usually takes place the night before the wedding, after the wedding rehearsal. Bridesmaids are expected to attend the rehearsal and the dinner, and they may also be involved in organising the event.

Wedding Attire

Bridesmaids are typically responsible for purchasing their own gowns, accessories, and shoes, as well as attending fittings. They may also be involved in choosing the wedding attire with the bride and other bridesmaids.

Emotional Support

Throughout the planning process and the wedding day, bridesmaids are expected to provide emotional support to the bride. This includes being a sounding board for any wedding-related stress and helping to keep the bride calm and relaxed.

Wedding Preparation

Bridesmaids often lend a helping hand with various wedding preparation tasks. This could include addressing invitations, making DIY favours or place cards, or decorating the venue. They may also assist the bride with wedding dress shopping and providing honest and respectful opinions.

Communication and Coordination

Bridesmaids may act as a point of contact for other bridesmaids, the bride's family, and guests, fielding any questions they may have. They also coordinate communications and logistics on the day of the wedding, such as communicating with vendors and guests.

In summary, bridesmaids play a crucial role in the pre-wedding events, offering practical, financial, and emotional support to the bride and the maid of honour. Their presence and participation in these events help create memorable experiences for the couple and their loved ones in the lead-up to the big day.

Wedding day duties

The wedding day is finally here! It's all about supporting your friend and the bride—making sure she is calm, cared for, and that everything goes smoothly. Here is a detailed list of a bridesmaid's duties on the big day:

• Get ready with the bride and the rest of the bridal party. It is customary to get ready together at the bride's house or hotel and travel to the venue together.
• Help the bride with her outfit, hair, and makeup. Ensure she eats breakfast, stays hydrated, and has a snack handy.
• Keep an eye on the time and introduce yourself to key people, like the photographer, videographer, or florist, so they know to come to you with any questions.
• Help the bride with her dress, shoes, and jewellery, and assist with any outfit changes.
• Take the bride's bouquet for the ceremony.
• Supervise junior bridesmaids and flower girls, showing them where to stand and keeping an eye on them.
• Walk down the aisle with the bride and stand at the altar during the ceremony. You may also be asked to give a reading or sign the register.
• Socialise with guests, help them find their seats, and lead the dancing during the reception.
• Be available for wedding photos.
• Give a speech if the couple asks you to.
• Check in with the newlyweds to ensure they are well-fed and hydrated.
• Assist the bride with bathroom breaks and outfit changes.
• Help round up family members for photos.
• Assist with the send-off, such as a sparkler exit, and take the wedding bouquet to preserve it.
• Help with cleaning up and taking down decorations.
• Collect any wedding gifts and cards to keep them safe.
• Tip any staff or vendors.
• Help the bride out of her dress and pack it to prevent damage.
• Attend any post-wedding events, such as a farewell party or post-wedding brunch.

Remember, each wedding and bride is unique, so the specific duties may vary. The most important thing is to be supportive, proactive, and positive throughout the day!

Post-wedding duties

Being a bridesmaid comes with a long list of responsibilities, and these duties don't end when the wedding does. Here are some post-wedding duties that bridesmaids should keep in mind:

Attend the Farewell Party

If the newlyweds are hosting a farewell party or a post-wedding brunch, it is customary for the bridesmaids to attend. It is important to be punctual and well-rested for this event, especially after a late night of celebrations. A thoughtful gesture would be to check in with the couple and see if they need anything, such as extra-large coffees delivered to their room.

Organise Miscellaneous Items

Bridesmaids may be tasked with taking down decorations, collecting gifts and cards, or gathering personal items left at the venue. It is important to organise and return any miscellaneous items to the couple or other bridesmaids within a few days of the wedding to avoid misplacing them.

Settle Outstanding Payments

Bridesmaids should aim to settle any outstanding expenses promptly after the wedding. This includes any costs that were split among the bridal party, such as transportation or accommodation. Sending payment requests soon after the wedding will help avoid surprising anyone with unexpected costs.

Create a Digital Collection of Photos and Videos

The bridal party often captures many special moments during the wedding celebrations. Bridesmaids can offer to create a digital collection of these photos and videos for the couple to enjoy while they await their official wedding photos.

Continue to Provide Emotional Support

Even after the wedding, bridesmaids can continue to provide emotional support to the newlyweds as they adjust to married life. Checking in with the couple and offering a listening ear can go a long way in helping them navigate any post-wedding stress or challenges.

Financial responsibilities

Being a bridesmaid comes with a lot of financial responsibilities, and it's important to be aware of these before agreeing to take on the role. Here are some of the key financial aspects to consider:

Pre-Wedding Expenses

Bridesmaids are usually expected to pay for their own attire, including the dress, shoes, and accessories. This can be a significant expense, especially if there are specific requirements from the bride. It's also common for bridesmaids to chip in for the bridal shower and bachelorette party, which can involve costs for decorations, food, and travel.

Travel and Accommodation

If the wedding is not local, bridesmaids are typically responsible for booking and covering the costs of their travel and accommodations. This includes flights, hotels, and any other necessary transportation. It's advisable to book these early to ensure convenience and avoid higher costs.

Gifts and Registry

As with any wedding guest, bridesmaids are expected to give a gift to the couple. This could be an item from their wedding registry or a monetary gift. Sometimes, bridesmaids also go in together on a larger, more expensive gift for the couple.

Post-Wedding Expenses

Even after the wedding, there may be some financial obligations. For example, settling any outstanding payments or bills related to shared expenses, such as the bridal shower or bachelorette party.

Optional Extras

While not mandatory, there are other potential costs to keep in mind. For instance, sending an engagement gift, attending an engagement party, or contributing to a farewell brunch the day after the wedding.

It's important to remember that the financial responsibilities of a bridesmaid can vary depending on the couple's expectations and the specific circumstances of the wedding. Open communication about financial expectations is crucial to ensure everyone is on the same page and to avoid any unexpected costs.

Frequently asked questions