Asking Bridesmaids: Gifts, A Gesture Of Gratitude?

should you include gift when asking bridesmaids

Bridesmaids play an important role in weddings, and it is becoming increasingly common for brides to give their bridesmaids gifts when asking them to be a part of their bridal party. While it is not mandatory, it is a thoughtful gesture that shows your bridal party how much you appreciate them. There are many options for gifts, from small tokens of appreciation to more expensive items like jewellery. It is also becoming more common to give a bridesmaid proposal box, which is a box filled with small goodies that the bridal party can use before the wedding and on the big day.

Characteristics Values
Occasion Bridal party proposal, bridal luncheon, rehearsal dinner, wedding day, farewell brunch
Timing Within two months of getting engaged, a few days before the ceremony, during the wedding week
Contents Something to wear, jewellery, self-care goodies, food and drink, candles, robes, pyjamas, tote bags, cosmetics cases, travel accessories, etc.

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Proposal gifts vs thank-you gifts

Proposal gifts and thank-you gifts are both ways to show your bridal party how much you appreciate them. However, they are distinct from each other. Here's a detailed overview:

Proposal Gifts:

  • Timing: These gifts are given when asking someone to be a bridesmaid, either in person or as a surprise gift.
  • Purpose: They show your bridal party how much you care and get them excited about the wedding festivities.
  • Examples: Personalized wine glasses, cosmetic cases, sentimental jewellery, etc.
  • Cost: These gifts are usually smaller and less expensive, like chocolate, cups, or cards.

Thank-You Gifts:

  • Timing: Thank-you gifts are typically given closer to the wedding, such as at the rehearsal dinner, bridal brunch, or morning of the wedding.
  • Purpose: They serve as tokens of appreciation for the time, effort, and money invested by the bridal party in your wedding.
  • Examples: Robes, pajamas, jewellery, etc.
  • Cost: These gifts tend to be bigger and more expensive, usually in the $50 to $100 range.

Additional Considerations:

  • Two Gifts: If you give a proposal gift, you'll usually need a second, official gift later on as a token of appreciation.
  • Mandatory vs. Optional: Neither proposal gifts nor thank-you gifts are mandatory, but both are thoughtful gestures that can enhance the excitement of your bridal party.
  • Budget: The amount you spend on gifts is entirely up to you and can depend on factors like your wedding budget and the number of bridesmaids.

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Gifts for the bridal party to wear on the wedding day

When it comes to bridal party gifts, there are a few different approaches you can take. You might opt to give your bridal party a gift when asking them to be part of your wedding, or you may choose to give them a gift on the wedding day itself. If you're looking for gifts for your bridal party to wear on the wedding day, here are some ideas:

Getting-Ready Robes

Luxe robes for your bridal party to wear while getting ready on the big day are a popular choice. These can be embroidered with each person's name and come in a variety of colours to coordinate with your wedding palette. Not only do they make for cute photos, but they also double as a comfortable gift your bridal party can enjoy long after the wedding.

Personalised Pyjamas

Much like robes, personalised pyjamas are a fun option for your bridal party to wear while getting ready. You can even opt for temperature-regulating fabric to keep everyone cool and comfortable. Embroidered initials or roles are a nice touch, and they make for a special keepsake.

Birth Flower Necklace

A birth flower necklace is a dainty and personalised gift for your bridal party. These necklaces feature a pendant stamped with the wearer's birth flower, which corresponds to their birth month. They're a unique way to celebrate each person's individuality and can be worn on the wedding day and beyond.

Insulated Drinkware

YETI drink tumblers are a practical and personalised gift for your bridal party. They come in a variety of colours and can be customised with names or initials. Your bridal party can use them to stay hydrated throughout the wedding day and beyond, maintaining their beverage's ideal temperature.

Novelty Dress Socks

Add a fun element to your bridal party's attire with novelty dress socks. Whether they're golf enthusiasts, foodies, or animal lovers, there are themed pairs of socks to match their interests. They're a lighthearted way to let your bridal party's personalities shine through and are sure to be worn again and again.

Personalised Bottle Opener

A wooden bottle opener is a stylish and functional gift for your bridal party, especially for those who enjoy a six-pack. You can have them laser-engraved with names or initials, making them a unique and memorable keepsake.

Cuff Links and Tie Clips

For a sophisticated and personalised gift, consider cuff links and tie clips for your bridal party. These can be crafted from silver and engraved with initials, names, or significant dates. They add a polished touch to formal attire and serve as a lasting reminder of the special day.

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Gifts for the bridal party to use on the wedding day

While it's not mandatory to give gifts to your bridal party, it's a thoughtful gesture to show your appreciation for their time, effort, and financial commitment to your wedding. Here are some gift ideas for the bridal party to use on the wedding day:

Getting-Ready Robes

Gift your bridal party luxurious robes to get ready in on the morning of the wedding. Not only will they make your squad feel extra special, but they'll also look great in the getting-ready photos. You can even get them embroidered with each person's name or role.

Personalized Drinkware

Customized drinkware is a classic gift for the bridal party. Consider getting each person in your bridal party a personalized tumbler, flask, or champagne flute. These can be used on the morning of the wedding and will come in handy long after the big day. Fill them with their favorite beverage, or pair them with a nice bottle of champagne or sparkling water.

Jewelry

Gift your bridal party some bling to wear on the wedding day and beyond. Birthstone or birth flower necklaces are a unique and personalized option. For a more glamorous option, go for pavé crystal hoop earrings. For a fun twist, you could also get them name necklaces or bracelets.

Beauty and Self-Care

Treat your bridal party to some beauty and self-care goodies. Gift them a set of luxurious pajamas or a cozy robe, along with some pampering essentials like sheet masks, eye gels, or a hydrating face cream. For an extra special touch, include a personalized makeup bag filled with their favorite products.

Practical Gifts

Think about what your bridal party might need on the wedding day and choose practical gifts that will come in handy. This could include a travel jewelry case, a yoga mat, a tumbler or water bottle, or even a spare pair of comfortable shoes.

Remember, it's the thought that counts, and your bridal party will surely appreciate any gift that shows your gratitude.

Bridesmaids' Dresses: Who Pays and Why?

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When to give gifts to the bridal party

There are a few different approaches to giving gifts to your bridal party. Firstly, it is important to note that gifts are not mandatory, but they are highly recommended as a token of appreciation for your bridal party's time, money, and energy.

The first occasion to give a gift is when you are asking someone to be a member of your bridal party. This is not required by etiquette, but it is a lovely gesture to get your bridal party excited about the events to come. You can give the gift in person or send it to them as a surprise along with your question.

The second approach is to give gifts a few days before the ceremony, especially if you have a gift you'd like your bridal party to wear or use on the day of the wedding, such as jewellery or robes. This timing also works well for destination weddings when everyone is already in town and spending time together.

The third and perhaps most popular option is to give gifts at the rehearsal dinner, where all your bridal party will be in attendance. It is customary to give gifts at a bridal luncheon, which usually takes place the day before the wedding or during the week of the wedding. This is a great time to give robes or pyjamas that your bridal party can wear while getting ready for the wedding. If you are giving gifts that you'd like them to use or wear on the actual day, it is not too late to give them at the rehearsal dinner.

Finally, you can give gifts on the wedding day itself, although this might be a bit tricky as it is already a busy day for everyone involved. A bridal brunch or luncheon is the latest opportunity to give out gifts and express your appreciation.

Remember, it is best to give all your gifts at once if possible, so everyone receives their gift at the same time.

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Budgeting for gifts

Budgeting for bridesmaid gifts can be a tricky task, but with careful planning and consideration, it can be a breeze. Here are some tips to help you budget for these special tokens of appreciation:

Establish a Total Gift Budget:

Start by determining the total amount you are willing to spend on all bridesmaid gifts. This will be your foundation for allocating funds for individual gifts. It is important to keep in mind that you should ideally spend the same amount on each bridesmaid to show consistency and appreciation.

Consider the Number of Bridesmaids:

The number of bridesmaids you have will directly impact your budget. If you have a larger bridal party, you may need to adjust your spending per person accordingly. It is important to ensure that you have enough funds allocated for each person to feel valued and appreciated.

Personalize the Gifts:

Adding a personal touch to your gifts can make them more meaningful and memorable. Consider incorporating their names, wedding roles, or even a heartfelt message. Personalization can range from monogramming to customized jewelry, allowing you to showcase your creativity and thoughtfulness.

Choose Thoughtful Gifts:

The sentiment behind the gift often outweighs the monetary value. Opt for gifts that hold personal significance for each bridesmaid, regardless of the price tag. You can include items that relate to their interests, hobbies, or favorite things. This will make them feel truly valued and understood.

DIY and Handmade Elements:

Incorporating do-it-yourself (DIY) touches or handmade items can add a special flair to your gifts without breaking the bank. Consider creating personalized cards, crafting gift boxes, or adding handmade decorations. These unique touches will be cherished by your bridesmaids and can help stretch your budget further.

Group Gifting:

If your budget is tight, consider combining resources with other members of the bridal party or even the bride herself. By pooling your funds, you can purchase more substantial gifts that may be beyond your individual means. This approach can also foster a sense of collaboration and unity among the bridal party.

Practicality vs. Sentimentality:

Finding a balance between practicality and sentimentality is essential. While a practical gift may be useful in their everyday lives, a sentimental item holds emotional value. You can opt for a combination of both by including a heartfelt card or note along with a practical gift, or choose items that blend functionality and sentiment.

Timing of Gifts:

When budgeting, consider the timing of when you plan to give the gifts. If you are including a small token during the initial "bridesmaid proposal," you will likely need a second, more substantial gift for the actual wedding week. Planning for multiple gifts will impact your overall budget, so allocate your funds accordingly.

Other Wedding Costs:

Keep in mind the other costs associated with being a bridesmaid, such as dresses, alterations, accessories, and travel expenses. Your bridesmaids may be incurring significant costs to participate in your special day, so be mindful of their overall financial commitment when determining your gift budget.

Sales and Discounts:

Keep an eye out for sales and discounts to stretch your budget further. Black Friday sales, for example, can be a great opportunity to find deals on bridesmaid dresses or accessories. Additionally, watch for flight deals, hotel discounts, and clearance items that can help reduce the overall financial burden on your bridal party.

Remember, the most important aspect of budgeting for bridesmaid gifts is to show your appreciation and gratitude. By incorporating these tips, you can navigate the task of budgeting with thoughtfulness and consideration, ensuring that your bridesmaids feel valued and cherished.

Frequently asked questions

Bridesmaid proposal gifts are not required, but they are a popular and thoughtful gesture. A small gift can show your bridesmaids how much you appreciate their support and can get them excited about the wedding festivities to come.

It is customary to give proposal gifts two to three months after getting engaged. This gives your bridesmaids plenty of time to plan and budget for the wedding and its associated events.

You can fill a bridesmaid proposal box with small gifts such as a makeup bag, brightening eye masks, bath bombs, hand lotion, or a bottle of champagne with a personalised wine glass. You can also include a proposal card with a heartfelt message.

How much you spend on proposal gifts is entirely up to you and will depend on your budget. A good rule of thumb is to spend a similar amount to what you would spend on a birthday or holiday gift for that person.

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