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To wed is to get married to someone. Marriage vows are promises each partner in a couple makes to the other during a wedding ceremony. The wedding vows as practised in most English-speaking countries derive from the Sarum rite of medieval England. The oldest traditional wedding vows can be traced back to the manuals of the medieval church. In civil ceremonies, couples are often allowed to choose their own marriage vows.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Definition of 'wed' | To get married to someone; to take for wife or husband by a formal ceremony; to join in marriage; to unite as if by marriage |
| Synonyms | Marry, get married, be united, tie the knot |
| Sample sentence | In 1952 she wed film director Roger Vadim |
| Word origin | before 900; ME wedde, OE weddian to pledge; c. G wetten to bet, ON vethja to pledge |
| Wedding vows | "With this Ring I thee wed, with my body I thee worship, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow: In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost. Amen." |
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What You'll Learn
Wedding vows
Traditional Vows
Traditional wedding vows are a classic choice and can be a great starting point for personalizing your own vows. They often include phrases such as:
"I, [name], take you, [name], to be my lawfully wedded wife/husband."
"In the presence of God/name of God, I take you to be my wedded wife/faithful husband for all the days of our lives."
Personalized Vows
Personalizing your wedding vows adds a special touch and can make your ceremony more meaningful. You can include inside jokes, references to your journey together, or the activities and hobbies that are integral to your relationship. Here are some examples:
"I shared how growing up, I had the most beautiful example of marriage from my parents. A tidbit I shared was how they named me Hoàng-Kim, which means Golden Age, and I feel like every day with you is a Golden Age. I promise to make the best and right choices for us so our marriage will be like our own Golden Age."
"I love all of your qualities and accept every part of you—just as you are. You are caring and devoted to raising our children, always ready to fix a problem, and open about sharing your feelings and thoughts. I vow to you that whenever you stop meal planning, I will cook creamy pasta..."
Romantic Vows
Romantic wedding vows can be a beautiful expression of your love. They can include promises to support and cherish each other, as well as references to your future together. Here are some examples:
"I promise to never take you for granted and to love and cherish every single day that I have with you. Together, we will walk into the future side by side as partners, lovers, best friends, and as husband and wife. Together, we can accomplish the life we dream of, because we are a team."
"I promise to love you through good times and bad, through sickness and health, and everything in between. I vow to be your lone candle, holding back the dark and igniting the stars. I promise all of these things, from now until forever, because you should have nothing less than my best."
Humorous Vows
Adding a touch of humor to your wedding vows can lighten the mood and reflect your personality as a couple. Here's an example:
"I promise to never make those terrible cliché jokes about 'the ol' ball and chain,' because I will always see you as the one who frees me, and never as a prison. I promise to feign offense every time you rip one, even though we both know it's really funny, because I know how much your laugh means to me."
Remember, your wedding vows should be a reflection of your relationship and what you want your future together to look like. Whether you choose to keep them traditional, romantic, or add a touch of humor, make sure they are meaningful and come from the heart.
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Wedding customs
India
Mehndi is an integral part of Indian weddings, where the bride's female friends and family gather before the wedding to paint their skin with intricate henna designs. The henna is believed to symbolise love, prosperity and the deepening bond between the couple. Another custom in Indian weddings is for the bride's family to "kidnap" the groom's shoes, which he must then "ransom" back. Additionally, for brides born during a specific astrological period, there is a custom of marrying a tree and then cutting it down to break the curse of early widowhood.
South Korea
The "Falaka" ceremony involves the groom's friends and family playfully beating the bottom of his feet with a stick or dried fish. In between the beatings, they ask him trivia questions, which is believed to strengthen his memory and quick wit in preparation for married life. Another important moment in Korean weddings is the "paebaek", where the couple bows and pours tea for both sets of parents, who then offer blessings and monetary gifts.
Italy
On the night before the wedding, it is customary for the groom to throw a surprise party outside his bride's window, serenading her with musicians before the celebration evolves into a bash with food and drinks for all the couple's friends and family.
Greece
Greek weddings are filled with sweetness and camaraderie. The groom's best man takes on the role of a barber, shaving the groom before the ceremony. Following this, the groom is fed honey and almonds by his mother-in-law, symbolising the sweetness of life and the blending of families. Greek brides also hide a sugar cube in their glove for a sweet life and place a gold coin in their shoe for prosperity.
Nigeria
Nigerian weddings are usually characterised by a profusion of colours. The traditional wedding ceremony involves elders from both families negotiating and presenting the bride price, which consists of gifts such as shoes, textiles, jewellery and bags.
These are just a few examples of the diverse and fascinating wedding customs observed around the world, each with its own symbolic significance and historical context.
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Marriage in different cultures
Marriage is a custom that is present in almost all cultures. However, the specific traditions and customs surrounding marriage differ vastly across cultures.
For example, in some Islamic weddings, the main requirement is the signing of the marriage contract at the nikah ceremony. In contrast, in traditional Chinese marriages, the wedding is a ceremonial ritual within Chinese societies that involves a marriage established by pre-arrangement between families. In Germany, on the night before the wedding, the couple hosts a polterabend, a celebration where guests smash porcelain to ensure good luck for the marriage. In Brazil, wedding ceremonies often incorporate rituals that revolve around the natural elements of sand, water, or fire. Each element is said to enhance the couple's future marriage.
Fashion is also a significant aspect of marriage in different cultures. In Spain, most brides wear an intricate wedding veil known as a mantilla, and there are no bridesmaids or groomsmen. In Japan, a bride celebrating a traditional Shinto ceremony wears white from head to toe, including a hood called a "tsunokakashi" to hide her feelings of jealousy towards her mother-in-law. In Albania, the bride's dress is characterized by its elegance and transparency, while in Catholic weddings, the dress is characterized by its picturesque effects and harmony.
Some unique wedding traditions from various cultures include the "jumping the broom" ritual in West African and African-American weddings, which symbolizes sweeping away past wrongs and warding off evil spirits. In Germany, couples receive a large log and a saw and are supposed to saw the log in half together, symbolizing their ability to overcome obstacles in their marriage. In Sweden, a traditional wedding cake called kransekake is served, and in Mexico, there is a money dance where everyone who dances with the bride or groom pins money on their outfit to contribute to the honeymoon and wedding expenses.
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Civil vs. religious weddings
The decision to have a civil or religious wedding is a highly personal one. Couples should choose the type of ceremony that reflects their values and beliefs. While civil weddings are more popular than religious ones, with 70% of marriages being civil in 2012, religious weddings are still a common choice for many.
Religious Weddings
Religious weddings are for couples who want their marriage to be recognised in the eyes of God or another deity. They are usually held in churches or other houses of worship and are presided over by religious officials such as priests, rabbis, or ministers. To be legally binding in England and Wales, religious weddings must be Anglican, Quaker, or Jewish. All other religions require a separate civil ceremony to be legally recognised.
Religious weddings tend to follow a standard format, including elements such as hymns, a pastoral speech, communion, and religious vows. Couples may not be given the opportunity to tailor their ceremonies, and there may be restrictions on outdoor weddings or other non-traditional elements. However, some faiths allow flexibility in the format, such as the style of music or slight adjustments to the vows.
Civil Weddings
Civil weddings are non-religious and legally binding ceremonies. They are presided over by a legal or civil representative and can take place in a variety of licensed venues, including registry offices, town halls, hotels, manors, cinemas, boats, or even outdoors in a garden, on a beach, or in a couple's backyard.
Civil weddings offer greater flexibility in terms of venue and format. Couples can include religious elements, such as hymns or prayers, or choose to exclude them entirely. Civil weddings can also be tailored to include personal touches, such as poems or unique vows. Additionally, civil weddings may be more accessible for guests with mobility requirements, as older churches may not be accessible to everyone.
Cost Comparison
The cost of performing a wedding ceremony varies depending on the type of venue and location. In Australia, civil celebrants typically charge between $500 and $800, while registry offices charge between $250 and $350. Houses of worship generally have set fees, ranging from a few hundred dollars to around $1500 for a cathedral wedding. Civil ceremony venues may charge additional fees for the setup, hire of the room, and other services. On the other hand, getting married in the Church of England is relatively inexpensive, with an average cost of around £300.
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Wedding planning
Budgeting
Firstly, it's important to set a budget. The guest list count will influence the overall cost, as will the venue and vendors you choose. Brainstorming your guest list and setting a budget are the first steps in the planning process. Once you have a budget, you can start to think about what type of wedding you want—small and intimate, or large and lavish.
Timing
Most couples take over a year to plan their wedding, with the average engagement length being 15 months. You can use this time to research, gather ideas, and create a vision. Think about the colours, theme, location, and attire. You should also consider whether you want to hire a wedding planner to help guide you through the process and handle the logistics.
Venue and Vendors
Choosing a venue is one of the most important decisions you'll make. The venue will affect the vibe of your wedding and the experience of your guests. When selecting vendors, such as caterers, photographers, and entertainment, be sure to read reviews and ask for recommendations. Keep track of payments to each vendor to avoid any awkward situations before the big day.
The Rehearsal
The rehearsal dinner is an important part of the planning process. You'll need to select a venue, create a guest list, choose catering, and send out invitations. Even if you don't hire a full-service wedding planner, consider employing a professional to oversee the day-of details and keep things running smoothly.
The Big Day
On the day of the wedding, the happy couple should focus on celebrating their love and rejoicing in the moment. To ensure things run smoothly, create a comprehensive wedding-day schedule, including timings for hair and makeup, vendor arrivals, transportation, and the ceremony start time. Make sure to confirm all details with vendors, including final headcounts and locations.
Extra Tips
- Apply for special events insurance to protect yourself from damage and liabilities on the big day.
- Order enough wedding invitations and set up a system to record RSVP replies.
- If you plan to leave for your honeymoon after the wedding, make sure you're packed and ready to go.
- If you're looking to save money, consider a mid-week wedding—Wednesdays are often discounted!
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Frequently asked questions
To wed is to get married to someone. It is mainly used in a formal context.
The word wed shares a Germanic root with words in various languages, meaning "pledge," but also "bet or wager."
Sure, here are some examples:
- "She wed film director Roger Vadim in 1952."
- "The actress wed her fourth husband last year."
