The Art Of Addressing: A Guide To Writing Letters For The Newlywed Mr. And Mrs

how write letter for wedding mrs and mr

When writing a letter to a married couple, there are a few conventions to consider. Traditionally, the couple is addressed using the husband's name, for example, Mr. and Mrs. John Smith. However, it is becoming more common to include the wife's first name as well, such as Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith. If the couple has different last names, you can list the person you are closest with first or go in alphabetical order. For a more informal approach, you can simply write their first and last names without titles, such as John and Jane Smith. It is also acceptable to address them as The Smiths.

Characteristics Values
Formality Formal or Informal
Titles Mr., Mrs., Ms., Mx., Dr., etc.
Full Names First and Last Names
Address Street, City, State, and Postal Code
Return Address Sender's Name and Address

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Formal vs informal

When it comes to addressing a wedding invitation, there are a few different scenarios to consider. The most common approach is to use formal titles such as "Mr." and "Mrs." followed by the last name of the married couple. This is the traditional and formal way to address an envelope to a married couple. For example, "Mr. and Mrs. Robert Gaiman".

However, there is a shift towards a more modern and informal style, where titles are forgone in favour of first and last names. This approach is particularly useful when addressing couples with different last names or when you are unsure of an individual's preferred title. An example of this would be, "Celine Elgin and Jacqueline Purcell".

Additionally, when addressing a married couple with the same last name, it is common to use the format "Mr. John and Mrs. Samantha Rivera" on the outer envelope and "Mr. and Mrs. John Rivera" on the inner envelope.

The level of formality in a wedding invitation is also reflected in the wording and formatting. Formal invitations tend to be more traditional, with full spellings, no abbreviations, and a focus on honour and ceremony. Informal invitations, on the other hand, offer more flexibility with abbreviations, modern wording, and a casual tone.

The invitation's design and paper stock can also indicate formality. Formal invitations often feature plainer designs and heavier paper stock, while semi-formal or informal invitations may include coloured designs and inspirational messages.

Ultimately, the decision to use formal or informal addressing, wording, and design rests with the couple and should reflect their desired level of formality for their wedding.

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Titles and surnames

When addressing a wedding invitation, there are a few different scenarios to be aware of that will change how you write guests' names on your envelopes. Here are some guidelines to follow when it comes to titles and surnames:

Married Couple:

The traditional way to address a married couple is to use "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's first name and last name, for example, "Mr. and Mrs. Robert Gaiman". However, it is also common to include the wife's first name as well, such as "Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Doe". This is considered more gracious and formal. If the couple has different last names, you can list their names separately, for example, "Ms. Celine Elgin and Ms. Jacqueline Purcell".

Unmarried Couple:

For an unmarried couple, both names should be included on separate lines, for example, "Mr. Aaron Triguiero" and "Mr. Gabriel Reyes". List the person you are closest with first or go in alphabetical order if you are equally close to both guests.

Military or Distinguished Titles:

If a guest has a distinguished title, such as a military rank, it is proper etiquette to address them by that title. For example, "Lieutenant Jonathan Kelly, US Navy and Mrs. Jane Kelly". If both guests have special titles, you can list their names alphabetically or with the person with the higher-ranking title first.

Inner and Outer Envelopes:

Traditionally, the inner and outer envelopes follow different etiquette rules. The outer envelope should be formal, with the recipient's full name(s) and personal title(s). The inner envelope is more informal, allowing you to leave out elements of the formal name format.

Modern Approaches:

Nowadays, there is no longer a "right" or "wrong" way to address envelopes. You can choose to forgo titles and use first and last names only, such as "Adam and Ruben Martinez". This approach is more modern and gender-neutral, especially if some guests do not identify as Mr., Mrs., Miss, or Ms. You can also use gender-neutral titles like "Mx." but always double-check your attendees' preferred titles beforehand.

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Titles and full names

When addressing a letter to a married couple, there are a few different options to consider. Here are some examples of how to format the titles and full names:

Traditional Approach:

Use "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's first name and last name. For example:

> Mr. and Mrs. Robert Gaiman

> Mr. and Ms. John Steele

> Mr. and Mrs. Bill Oster

Modern Approach:

Write the wife's name first, followed by the husband's name on the same line. If their names are too long, you can list them separately. For example:

> Mrs. Natalia Evans and Mr. Daniel Bing

If the couple has hyphenated their last names, address the wife as "Ms." or "Mrs." with her first name and hyphenated last name, and the husband as "Mr." with his full name. For example:

> Mr. Nathan Andrews and Ms. Samantha Davis-Andrews

Alphabetical Order:

When addressing an unmarried couple or a married couple with different last names, it is common to list the names alphabetically. For example:

> Ms. Dana Stevens and Ms. Lisa Marvel

Professional Titles:

If one or both individuals have a professional title, such as "Doctor", "Lieutenant", "Judge", etc., be sure to include this in the address. For example:

> Doctors Jason and Rebecca Dawson

> Doctor Janice Warren and Mr. John Sanders

> Lieutenant Jonathan Kelly, US Navy and Mrs. Jane Kelly

Inner Envelopes:

It is worth noting that inner envelopes are more informal, so you have the option to leave out certain elements of the formal name format. You can use only personal titles and last names or go with a casual approach using first names only.

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Inner and outer envelopes

The inner and outer envelopes of a wedding invitation serve different purposes and follow different etiquette rules. The outer envelope is the formal, mailing envelope that includes the recipient's address. It should be addressed using the recipient's full name and title, or just their first and last name for a more modern approach. The inner envelope is smaller and more informal, stating exactly who is invited to the wedding. Traditionally, the inner envelope was used to ensure that the wedding invitation arrived in pristine condition, as the outer envelope could get dirty during hand delivery. Today, the inner envelope is useful for clarifying who is invited, especially when children are involved.

Married Couple (Same Last Name)

Outer Envelope (Formal):

Mr. and Mrs. Baldwin

Outer Envelope (Contemporary):

James and Heather

Inner Envelope (Formal):

Mr. and Mrs. Baldwin

Inner Envelope (Contemporary):

James and Heather

Married Couple (Different Last Names)

Outer Envelope (Formal):

Ms. Swift and Mr. Brookes

Outer Envelope (Contemporary):

Sandy and George

Inner Envelope (Formal):

Ms. Swift and Mr. Brookes

Inner Envelope (Contemporary):

Sandy and George

Single Woman

Outer Envelope (Formal):

Miss Cartwright

Outer Envelope (Contemporary):

Cynthia

Inner Envelope (Formal):

Miss Cartwright and Ben (if you don't know the name of the guest, write "and guest")

Inner Envelope (Contemporary):

Cynthia and Ben

Single Man

Outer Envelope (Formal):

Mr. Anderson

Outer Envelope (Contemporary):

Ben

Inner Envelope (Formal):

Mr. Anderson and Guest

Inner Envelope (Contemporary):

Ben and Guest

Unmarried Couple (at the same address)

Outer Envelope (Formal):

Ms. Smith and Mr. Green

Outer Envelope (Contemporary):

Colleen and James

Inner Envelope (Formal):

Ms. Smith and Mr. Green

Inner Envelope (Contemporary):

Colleen and James

Families with Children

When inviting families with young children, list each child's name on the inner envelope to indicate that they are invited. If you don't include their names, it implies that children are not invited.

Outer Envelope (Formal):

Mr. and Mrs. Brown

Outer Envelope (Contemporary):

Andrea, Steve, and Family

Inner Envelope (Formal):

Mr. and Mrs. Brown, Andrea, Steve, Kevin, and Katrina

Inner Envelope (Contemporary):

Andrea, Steve, Kevin, and Katrina

People with Distinguished Titles

Only include titles on the inner envelope if your guest is a doctor, judge, or high-ranking military professional.

Outer Envelope:

Dr. Anne Barker and Mr. Peter Underwood

Inner Envelope (Formal):

Dr. Barker and Mr. Underwood

Inner Envelope (Contemporary):

Anne and Peter

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Addressing distinguished titles

When addressing distinguished titles, it is important to follow the correct etiquette. Here are some guidelines to follow when addressing wedding invitations to individuals with distinguished titles:

  • Doctors: On the outer envelope, address as "Dr. [Name] and Mr./Mrs. [Name]". If both parties are doctors, address them as "Doctors [Name] and [Name]". On the inner envelope, you can use their surnames, e.g., "Dr. [Surname] and Mr./Mrs. [Surname]". Alternatively, you can address them as "The Doctors [Surname]".
  • Military Personnel: On the outer envelope, use their military title followed by their name, e.g., "Lieutenant [Name], US Navy and Mrs./Mr. [Name]". If both have military titles, address them as "Captains [Name] and [Name], US Navy". On the inner envelope, use their military titles and surnames, e.g., "Lieutenant [Surname], US Navy and Mrs./Mr. [Surname]".
  • Lawyers: On the outer envelope, address as "[Name], Esq. and Mr./Mrs. [Name]". If both parties are attorneys, use their names followed by "Esq.". On the inner envelope, you can address them as "Mr. and Mrs. [Surname]".
  • Judges: On the outer envelope, address as "The Honorable [Name] and Mr./Mrs. [Name] or Mx. [Name]". On the inner envelope, use their title and surname, e.g., "Judge [Surname] and Mr./Mrs./Mx. [Surname]".

Remember to always double-check the preferred titles and names of your guests before addressing the wedding invitations.

Frequently asked questions

On the outer envelope, write "Mr. and Mrs." followed by the husband's first and last name, for example, "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith". On the inner envelope, write "Mr. and Mrs." followed by their shared last name, for instance, "Mr. and Mrs. Smith".

On the outer envelope, write their full names, with the person you are closest to, or alphabetically, first. For example, "Ms. Celine Elgin and Ms. Jacqueline Purcell". On the inner envelope, write their first names, or just their last names. For instance, "Celine and Jacqueline" or "Ms. Elgin and Ms. Purcell".

If one person has a distinguished title, this should be included in the address. For the outer envelope, write the title and name of the person with the title first, followed by the other person's name. For example, "Lieutenant Beth March and Mr. Greg Wharton". On the inner envelope, write the title and name again, followed by "and" and the other person's name. For instance, "Lieutenant March, US Navy and Mr. Wharton".

If the couple is not married, write their names separately on two lines. For example, "Mr. Aaron Triguero" and "Mr. Gabriel Reyes".

If the couple is keeping their own last names, write their names with their respective titles. For example, "Mr. John Kelly and Ms. Jane Johnson".

Note: It is important to consider your relationship with the couple and their preferences when addressing the envelope. The above examples follow traditional etiquette, but you can also choose to use a more modern approach by only using first and last names, or asking the couple for their preferred titles and names.

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