Writing The Perfect Wedding Check: A Step-By-Step Guide

Writing a wedding check can be a confusing process, but it's important to get it right to avoid causing any issues for the happy couple. The key thing to remember is that the check should be written to both members of the couple using their pre-married names, and you should use the conjunction or between their names. This will ensure that either person can deposit the check without any problems, regardless of whether they have a joint account or not. It's also a good idea to include a note with the check to clarify that the gift is for both of them. Other tips include making sure you have sufficient funds in your account and writing the check in cursive.

Use both pre-married names

When writing a wedding check, it is important to consider the couple's preferences and what will be most convenient for them. Here are some tips for using both pre-married names:

• Write the check using the format "Bride's Name or Groom's Name." For example, "Mary or John Smith." This allows either individual to deposit the check, regardless of whether they have joint or separate accounts.
• Include a memo: Adding a memo line can clarify that the gift is intended for both individuals. You can write something like "Wedding gift for Mary and John" to ensure the check is appropriately directed.
• Avoid using titles: When writing the check, avoid using titles such as Mr., Mrs., or Ms. Simply use their first names and last name.
• Be mindful of name changes: Keep in mind that the bride might not be taking the partner's last name. Using her maiden name on the check is a safe option.
• Consider other options: If you are unsure about the couple's preferences or name changes, you may consider alternative gifting methods such as cash or electronic transfers.

Remember, the key is to make it convenient for the couple to deposit the check without any delays or complications.

Use 'or' instead of 'and'

When writing a wedding check, it is important to consider how the couple's names are written to ensure they can easily cash or deposit the check. While it may be tempting to write "Mr. & Mrs. Smith", this is not the best option as it can cause issues when depositing the check.

Instead, use "or" between the couple's names. For example, write "Mary or John Smith". By writing "or", either person can deposit the check, regardless of whether they have a joint or separate account. This is especially important if the bride is planning to change her name after the wedding, as she may not be able to deposit a check written to her new name until the name change is official.

If you are unsure about the bride's name change plans or want to be extra cautious, you can write the check to the bride using her maiden name. You can include a note on the memo line clarifying that the gift is for both members of the couple.

Date: Write the date in the upper right-hand corner, such as "July 1, 2022".

Payee: Write "Mary or John Smith" on the line that says "Pay to the Order of."

Check amount (numerical): Write the amount of the check in the box on the right, such as "$150.00".

Check amount (written out): Below the "Pay to the Order of" line, write out the amount in words, such as "One hundred fifty dollars and 00/100."

Memo: This section is optional, but you can include a note such as "Wedding gift for the happy couple."

Signature: Sign the check on the line in the bottom right corner.

Remember to use a pen when writing the check to prevent any information from being erased. Avoid writing blank checks, and always add the payee and amount before signing.

Avoid assuming name changes

When writing a wedding check, it's important to avoid assuming that the couple will follow any particular naming convention after their marriage. Here are some tips to ensure your gift is accessible to the newlyweds:

• Use the couple's pre-married names: It's best to use the couple's names as they are before the wedding. This is because the process of changing names after marriage takes time, and the recipient may want to cash the check before or soon after the wedding. Using their pre-married names ensures they can do so without hassle.
• Avoid assuming name changes: Do not assume that a heterosexual couple will follow the tradition of the wife taking the husband's last name. Also, refrain from assuming that a couple who chooses to hyphenate their last names will do so in alphabetical order. It's important to respect individual choices and avoid making assumptions about name changes.
• Confirm the couple's official names: If you know that the couple will be changing their names after the wedding, it's a good idea to ask their parents or someone close to them to confirm their new official names. This will ensure that your check is addressed correctly and can be easily cashed by the recipients.
• Use "or" instead of "and": When writing the check, use the word "or" instead of "and" between the couple's names. For example, write "Kim Jones or Jackie Garcia". This ensures that either member of the couple can deposit the check into their individual account without requiring both of them to be present at the bank.
• Consider giving cash or a digital gift: If you're unsure about the naming conventions or want to avoid any potential issues with the check, consider giving cash or using a digital payment option. While some sources suggest that writing a check is safer than giving cash, others recommend digital payment methods as a convenient and flexible alternative.

Include a note with the check

Including a note with the check is a great way to add a personal touch to your wedding gift. Here are some tips and suggestions for what to include in the note:

Address the Couple by Their Names

It is important to use both members of the couple's pre-married or maiden names on the check. Avoid using titles such as "Mr." or "Mrs." and instead, write their first names, such as "Kim Jones or Jackie Garcia". This way, either person can deposit the check into their account without any issues.

Specify the Amount of Your Monetary Gift

When writing the note, be sure to specify the exact amount of your monetary gift. This not only lets the couple know how much you gave but also serves as verification for them. This is especially helpful if the money was sent digitally or through the mail.

Express Your Congratulations and Well Wishes

Use the note as an opportunity to convey your sentiments and best wishes for the couple. You can write a simple "Congratulations!" or something more personalized, such as "Wishing you both all the best on this special day and for the future ahead!".

Mention How You Intend to Use the Gift

If you are giving a monetary gift, you can mention how the couple can use the money. For example, "We hope this contribution will help you both enjoy a wonderful honeymoon!". This adds a thoughtful touch and shows that you put thought into your gift.

Include a Fond Memory or Personal Message

If you have a special connection with the couple, feel free to include a fond memory or a personal message in your note. For example, "We are so happy we could be a part of your big day! We will always cherish the memories made on your wedding day.

Thank the Couple for Including You

If you were invited to the wedding, express your gratitude for being included in their special day. Something like, "Thank you for allowing us to share in your joy on your wedding day. It was an honour to be a part of your celebration." will surely be appreciated by the couple.

Remember to keep the note warm and heartfelt, and don't stress too much about perfection. The couple will surely appreciate the thought and effort you put into your gift and note!

Send the check in a card

Sending a wedding gift check in a card is a nice touch, and it allows you to convey your sentiments and congratulations to the newlyweds. It is also the safest way to give them your gift. Here are some tips to ensure your gift is useful and appreciated:

Addressing the Check

When addressing the check, do not use titles such as Mr., Mrs., Ms., etc. Instead, write their first names, such as "Kim Jones or Jackie Garcia." Using "or" instead of "and" ensures that either person can deposit the check into their account without the other being present. This is especially important if the couple does not have a joint account.

Names on the Check

Use both of the couple's pre-married or maiden names. Do not assume that the bride will take her partner's last name or that they will hyphenate their names. If you are unsure, ask their parents or a close friend to clarify their official names. It is also a good idea to avoid addressing the check to "Mr. & Mrs. HisFirst HisLast" as this may offend some people.

Amount to Give

The amount of money you give as a wedding gift will depend on your relationship to the couple and your financial situation. If you are a close friend or family member, $100 is generally considered appropriate. If you are bringing a large immediate family to the reception and have the means, up to $200 is acceptable. For co-workers, $50 is a good amount if possible. If your finances are tight, it is better to give what you can afford rather than overspending to impress.

Timing

If you are sending the check by mail, wait at least two to three weeks before asking the couple if they received it. They are likely enjoying their honeymoon or settling into their new life together. If you are giving the check at the wedding, it is best to give it to a close family member, a wedding party member, or the wedding planner, as the couple will be busy and the gift may get misplaced.

Other Tips

• Make sure you have sufficient funds in your account before writing the check.
• Include your name and address on the envelope, card, and check.
• If possible, send an email transfer instead of a check.
• Avoid making the check out to "Cash" as this can be risky if the check falls into the wrong hands.
• If you are unsure about the bride's name change, address the check to the groom only. This avoids issues with name changes and joint accounts.
• Include a note with the check to clarify that the gift is from both you and your partner, if applicable.

Frequently asked questions