Writing The Perfect Wedding Rehearsal Dinner Invite

A wedding rehearsal dinner is a perfect opportunity to bring together the couple's nearest and dearest for an intimate evening of dining and conversation. It is usually hosted by the groom's parents, but it doesn't have to be. The host of the evening should send out proper invitations to ensure that guests are on the same page regarding the timing of the event and to make them feel welcome. This is especially important for guests who are not directly involved in the rehearsal. The invitation should include the host's name, the couple's names, the event date, time, location, and RSVP details. It is recommended to send out invitations four to six weeks before the wedding, after the main wedding invitations have been mailed.

Who to invite

When deciding who to invite to your wedding rehearsal dinner, it's a good idea to make three lists: 'minimum', 'would like to have' and 'maximum'.

The minimum list should include those who will be at the ceremony rehearsal: parents and siblings of the couple, the wedding party (and their dates), any readers or ushers, and the officiant.

If you're happy to keep the guest list small, you can stop there. However, if you want to expand the guest list, consider adding the following:

• Close extended family members, such as aunts, uncles, and cousins.
• Plus-ones of the wedding party.
• Flower girls and ring bearers, depending on their age and relationships.
• Any out-of-town guests, especially if you're not having a destination wedding.

If you're having a destination wedding, it's customary to include all out-of-town guests in the festivities, including plus-ones. In this case, you might want to host a welcome party after the dinner to include those who aren't invited to the rehearsal dinner.

What to include

The wedding rehearsal dinner invitation is a very important part of the wedding planning process, almost as important as the actual wedding invitation. It is the first event of the wedding weekend, and it is a great opportunity to bring together the couple's nearest and dearest for an intimate evening of dining and conversation.

• The host's name(s): Traditionally, the groom's parents host the rehearsal dinner, but nowadays, the couple or any close family members can host the event. It is important to include the host's name(s) on the invitation, especially if it is not the couple.
• The names of the couple: It is customary to include the couple's names on the invitation, usually just their first names. If you are having a more formal event, you may want to use their full names.
• The event date, time, and location: Be sure to include the day of the week, the date, and the year. For a more formal invitation, write out the date, and for a casual invite, use numerals. Include both the start and end times, especially if the dinner is held at a restaurant or hall with a time limit. Also, provide the full address of the venue.
• The RSVP deadline and method: Include an RSVP date, which is typically about three to four weeks before the rehearsal dinner, and provide an email address or phone number for guests to respond.
• Additional information: You may also want to include other details such as the wedding website, dress code, or any other relevant information for the guests.

Remember, the wording of your rehearsal dinner invitation should match the level of formality of the event. These pre-wedding gatherings tend to be more informal, so the invitations can be more casual than the wedding invitations.

When to send

The timing of sending out the invites is crucial to ensure your guests receive them on time and can plan their attendance. Here are some guidelines on when to send out the wedding rehearsal dinner invitations:

• It is recommended to mail out the wedding rehearsal dinner invitations four to six weeks before the wedding day. This timing ensures that guests have enough notice and can plan their schedules accordingly.
• It is also suggested to send the rehearsal dinner invitations after the main wedding invitations have been mailed. This allows for a clear separation between the two events and avoids any confusion among the guests.
• If you prefer to include the rehearsal dinner invitation with the wedding invitation, you can do so by adding it as an insert card. This option is suitable when the guest lists for both events are similar. However, if the guest lists differ significantly, sending separate invitations is more appropriate.
• In the case of destination weddings or weddings where a significant number of guests are travelling, it is advisable to send the rehearsal dinner invitations earlier, around six to eight weeks in advance. This gives travelling guests ample time to make necessary arrangements and ensures they receive the invitation before their departure.
• When in doubt about the timing, it is always a good idea to consult with the couple or the wedding planner to confirm the preferred timeline for sending out the rehearsal dinner invitations.

By following these guidelines, you can ensure that your guests receive their invitations in a timely manner and have sufficient notice to attend the wedding rehearsal dinner.

How to send

Now that you've crafted the perfect wedding rehearsal dinner invitation, it's time to send them out. Here are some tips on how to do it:

• Timing is key: It is recommended to send out wedding rehearsal dinner invitations four to six weeks before the wedding, after the main wedding invitations have been dispatched. This gives your guests ample time to make arrangements and RSVP.
• Confirm the guest list: Besides the couple and the hosts (usually the groom's parents), the guest list typically includes all members of the wedding party, the officiant, and special family members. If you're hosting out-of-town guests, it's a nice gesture to invite them as well, making them feel included in the festivities.
• Choose the right format: While printed invitations are traditional and often preferred, email invitations are acceptable, especially if you're on a budget or have many out-of-town guests. However, you may need to send follow-up reminders for email invites to ensure your guests don't overlook them.
• Include all essential details: A basic wedding rehearsal dinner invitation should include the host's name(s), the couple's names, the date, time, venue, dress code (if applicable), and RSVP information. You may also include the wedding website address for guests to access more information.
• Insert cards or separate invites: Most couples include rehearsal dinner invitations as insert cards within their wedding invitation suites. This is practical, especially if your rehearsal dinner guest list largely overlaps with your wedding guest list. However, if your guest lists differ significantly (e.g., children are not invited to the rehearsal dinner), sending separate invitations may be clearer.
• Addressing the invitations: When addressing envelopes, be clear and specific about who is invited. Use names like "The Shelton Family" only if everyone in that household is invited. Otherwise, specify individual names. If a guest has a plus-one, try to find out their name to include on the invitation.
• Design and tone: The design and tone of your invitations should match the level of formality of the event. Rehearsal dinners are typically more casual than the wedding, so your invitations can be less formal and more creative. You can incorporate the couple's personality, hobbies, or shared interests into the design.
• RSVP instructions: Designate an RSVP point person, usually the event's host, and include their phone number and/or email address on the invitation. Also, provide an RSVP deadline for guests to respond by. Rehearsal dinner RSVPs are typically handled informally via email, phone call, or text message.

RSVP instructions

RSVPs for the wedding rehearsal dinner can be received more informally than wedding invitations, often in the form of an email, phone call or text message. It is important to designate an RSVP point person who will receive all the responses from the guests. This is usually the event's host, and their contact details should be included on the invitation.

The RSVP deadline should be included on the invitation, giving guests enough time to respond and allowing enough time for planning based on the expected number of guests.

The host should keep track of the responses, and this can be done using the wedding website, an online spreadsheet, or a basic Excel spreadsheet.

If you are sending paper invitations, it is a good idea to include an RSVP card and a stamped, self-addressed envelope to make it as easy as possible for your guests to respond.

Frequently asked questions