The Art Of Gratitude: Mastering The Return Address For Wedding Thank-Yous

Writing thank-you cards to your wedding guests is an important way to express your gratitude for their attendance and gifts. While the content of your message is essential, it's also crucial to consider the return address on the envelope. Here's a guide to help you with this task:

Placement of the Return Address:

When addressing envelopes for weddings, it is preferred to place the return address on the back flap of the envelope, unlike standard letters where the return address goes to the top left corner. This adds a touch of elegance and ensures your envelopes stand out.

Return Address Etiquette:

There are no hard and fast rules, but traditionally, the return address reflects whoever is hosting the wedding. This could be the couple themselves or their parents. Options include using first names only, first and last names, last names plus the word wedding, or even just the address without any names. If you're using last names, avoid combining them as you aren't married yet.

Return Address Options:

You can create return address labels, use pre-printed envelopes with your return address, or opt for a custom return address stamp. Each option has its pros and cons in terms of cost, time, and style. For instance, labels might be affordable and simple, but they may look inconsistent with the guest address. On the other hand, a custom stamp ensures a cohesive style with the guest address but requires more time to apply.

Remember, while the return address is important for practical reasons, the most crucial aspect of your thank-you cards is expressing your sincere appreciation to your guests for their presence and gifts.

Return address placement

When addressing envelopes for weddings, it is preferred to put the return address on the back flap of the envelope. This is different from a typical envelope, where the return address is placed in the top left corner.

There are a few reasons why you might want to opt for the back flap when addressing wedding envelopes. Firstly, it gives your guest address centre stage, allowing your calligraphy to shine. Secondly, it helps to distinguish the sender and recipient addresses, preventing any mix-ups by the post office.

That being said, there are no hard and fast rules when it comes to addressing envelopes. If you prefer the traditional way or feel it suits your personality better, go ahead and put the return address in the top left corner. It's your special day, after all!

If you're worried about the post office getting confused, there are a few tricks to help prevent this. You can use different-sized text or designs for the sender and return addresses, ensuring they are clearly distinguishable. Another option is to use return address labels, which are typically placed on the back flap and can help to avoid any mix-ups.

Now, let's talk about what to include in the return address. Traditionally, the return address would be whoever is hosting the wedding, which could be the couple themselves or their parents. Here are some options for wording:

• First names only (e.g. Alex and John)
• First and last names (e.g. Alex Jones and John Smith)
• Last names plus wedding (e.g. Jones and Smith Wedding)
• No names, just the address

If you're feeling creative, you can even opt for first initials or no names at all! It's entirely up to you and what you feel suits your envelopes best.

Return address etiquette

Return addresses are a key component of your wedding envelopes, so it's important to get them right. While there are no hard and fast rules, and you shouldn't feel forced to follow tradition, there are a few things to consider.

Placement

When addressing envelopes for weddings, it is preferred to put the return address on the back flap of the envelope, rather than in the top left corner. This is because the guest address is the star of the show and you want to ensure it stands out.

Names

Traditionally, whoever is hosting the wedding would be noted as the return address. So, this may be the parent(s) of the couple or the couple themselves. You could use first names only, first and last names, or last names plus the word 'wedding'. For example, 'Alex and John' or 'Jones and Smith Wedding'. One no-no is to combine last names, such as 'Alex and John Smith', as you aren't married yet.

Options

There are several options for getting your return address onto the envelope, from return address labels to pre-printed envelopes or a custom return address stamp. If you're working with a calligrapher, they can also hand-write the return address for you, ensuring a perfect match with the guest address.

Timing

It's a good idea to prepare your return address labels or stamps in advance, so that you can send out your thank-you cards promptly after the wedding. It is considered proper etiquette to mail wedding thank-you cards and it's best to do this as soon as possible, and no later than three months after the wedding.

Handwriting

Thank-you notes should always be handwritten. This shows that you've taken the time to personally write a thoughtful message.

Return address options

There are several options for including your return address on your wedding thank-you cards. Here are some of the most common methods:

• Return Address Labels: This is a simple and affordable option. You can create return address labels and stick them on the envelopes. These can be printed at places like VistaPrint and Shutterfly, or even designed on your computer and printed at home on label paper. However, it's important to consider the colour of your envelopes, as white labels on coloured envelopes may look inelegant.
• Pre-Printed Return Address on Envelope: When ordering envelopes online, you often have the option to add your return address for a small fee. This saves time as you don't need to write or stamp the address, and it provides a clean look. However, if you run out of envelopes or need more, you'll need to find another option for the return address.
• Return Address Stamp: Similar to labels, you can order a custom return address stamp. This option allows you to use coloured ink that matches the ink colour of the guest addresses. It provides a cohesive style but requires additional time to apply the stamp.
• Calligraphy Return Address: The most luxurious option is to have a calligrapher write your return address. This ensures a 100% match in writing style and ink colour. It's the most expensive choice due to the time and skill involved, but it's a completely hands-off option for the client.

When it comes to the wording of your return address, there are no hard and fast rules. Traditionally, whoever is hosting the wedding would be noted as the return address – this could be a parent or the couple themselves. Other options include using first names only, first and last names, last names plus the word "wedding", or even just the address without any names. If you're using last names, avoid combining them, as you aren't married yet.

When to send out your wedding thank-you notes

Sending out thank-you notes to your wedding guests is an important way to show your appreciation. While it may seem like a chore, it is proper etiquette and a way to let your guests know that you received their gift and appreciated their presence at your wedding. Here are some tips on when to send out your wedding thank-you notes:

Timing is Key

As a general rule, it is recommended to send out wedding thank-you notes within three months of your wedding date. This is considered a timely manner and provides ample time to ensure the notes are written, addressed, and mailed without feeling overwhelmed. While some sources suggest that you have up to a year to send thank-you notes, sending them out sooner is considered good practice. Sending notes too late may cause guests to assume you have forgotten about their gift or presence at your wedding, which can cause hurt feelings.

Pre-Wedding Gifts

For gifts received before the wedding, such as engagement or shower gifts, it is advisable to send thank-you notes within two weeks of receiving the gift. This ensures that your guests know you have received their gift and appreciated their thoughtfulness. If you are unable to send notes before the wedding, a quick phone call to the gift-giver is a good idea, followed by a handwritten note after your honeymoon.

Post-Wedding Gifts

For gifts received after the wedding, such as those that arrive after your honeymoon, you should aim to send thank-you notes within three months of receiving the gift. Writing and sending notes promptly shows your guests that you are grateful for their generosity.

Divide and Conquer

Writing wedding thank-you notes can be a daunting task, especially if you have a large number of guests. It is a good idea to divide the task with your partner and set daily goals to avoid feeling overwhelmed. You can also write notes as you open gifts or a few each night to stay on top of your thank-you note game!

Personalisation is Important

While it may be tempting to opt for pre-printed or digital thank-you notes, handwritten notes are considered more personal and meaningful. Taking the time to write a personalised message to each guest shows your appreciation for their gift and their presence at your wedding. Remember to mention the gift by name and include a sentence or two about how you plan to use it.

How to track gifts from wedding guests

It's easy to get lost in the excitement of your wedding and forget to keep track of the gifts you receive. But with a bit of organisation, you can make sure you're able to send thoughtful thank-you notes to your guests. Here are some tips to help you get started:

Use a Wedding Registry:

The Knot Registry is a free service that allows you to register for gifts from hundreds of retail partners. You can also link existing registries from other stores. Your registry will integrate with your wedding website and update regularly to reflect purchased gifts. The "Track Gifts" tab on your registry homepage lets you see the date purchased, the purchaser's name, and any included notes.

Utilise Online Tools:

Take advantage of online tools like Google Sheets or Excel to create a wedding gift tracker. You can include columns for the guest's name, the gift received, and whether a thank-you note has been sent. This method allows for easy editing and provides a digital record of your gifts.

Opt for a Physical Notebook:

If you prefer a more tangible approach, purchase a dedicated wedding gift log notebook or create your own template. You can write down gifts as you receive them or unwrap them at your wedding showers. This method ensures you have a physical record, but it may be more time-consuming to update and maintain.

Combine Digital and Physical Methods:

You can use a combination of digital and physical methods. For example, write down gifts in a notebook and then transfer the information to a digital spreadsheet later. This ensures you have a backup in case something happens to your physical notebook.

Ask for Help:

Don't hesitate to enlist the help of your partner, family, or wedding party. They may be able to remind you of gifts received, especially if they were given in public at a wedding shower. This can be especially helpful if you've lost track or forgotten to record certain gifts.

Send Thank-You Notes Promptly:

It is considered proper etiquette to send wedding thank-you cards within two weeks of returning from your honeymoon or within two weeks after the wedding if you postponed your trip. For gifts received before the wedding, send a thank-you card immediately. This timely approach will ensure your guests feel appreciated, and it will also help you stay organised.

Address Thank-You Cards Correctly:

When addressing thank-you cards, the interior can be informal. Use the gift giver's first name and include a personal message about the gift and how you plan to use it. It's also thoughtful to mention how much you appreciated their presence at your wedding or that you look forward to seeing them there if the gift was sent beforehand.

Pre-Print Return Addresses:

To save time, consider pre-printing your return address on the envelopes for your thank-you cards. This is generally considered acceptable etiquette, and it will streamline the process of sending out your cards.

By following these tips, you'll be able to efficiently track gifts from your wedding guests and express your gratitude with heartfelt and timely thank-you notes.

Frequently asked questions