Responding To Wedding Rsvps: A Guide For Guests

RSVPs are an essential part of wedding planning, allowing couples to finalise everything from seating plans to budgets. When responding to a wedding invitation, it's important to do so promptly and correctly, following the couple's instructions and preferred method of communication. This could be via a physical RSVP card, a wedding website, or email. Here are some key considerations when responding to a wedding invitation:

- Respond as soon as possible to avoid causing delays in the couple's planning process.

- Follow the couple's instructions carefully, including any specific requests or prompts.

- Include your full name(s) and the total number of guests attending.

- Provide any additional information requested, such as dietary restrictions or meal choices.

- Be mindful of the couple's preferences regarding plus-ones and children.

- Write a gracious and positive note, expressing gratitude and well-wishes.

Respond promptly

Responding promptly to a wedding invitation is one of the first duties of a wedding guest and is an important one. The couple will be finalising their numbers, creating a seating plan, and confirming their budget before the big day, so it's best to respond as soon as possible. Here are some tips to ensure you respond promptly and efficiently:

Respond as Soon as Possible:

Don't delay in sending your RSVP. The couple is relying on your timely response to finalise their wedding plans. Aim to respond within a few days of receiving the invitation, or at least before the RSVP deadline. This will help the couple immensely and prevent any last-minute chaos.

Follow the Couple's Instructions:

Pay close attention to the RSVP instructions provided by the couple. They may request a specific method of response, such as an RSVP card, a phone call, an email, or through their wedding website. Respect their preferred method and follow any additional instructions to ensure your response reaches them effectively.

Provide All Necessary Information:

When responding, include all the details requested by the couple. This typically includes your full name, the total number of guests attending, dietary restrictions or meal choices, and any other special prompts or questions they have included. This information is crucial for the couple's planning.

Be Clear and Concise:

Keep your response clear and concise. Indicate whether you are attending or not, and if you are bringing any additional guests, be sure to provide their names as well. If you are unable to attend, a short note expressing your regret is still appreciated. You can also provide a reason for your absence, especially if you are close with the couple.

Don't Delay if Plans Change:

Life can be unpredictable, and sometimes you may need to change your RSVP after initially responding. If your plans change, be sure to inform the couple as soon as possible. This is important, especially if you need to cancel close to the wedding date. Contact the couple or their wedding planner directly to let them know of the change in your plans.

Remember, responding promptly is a thoughtful gesture that helps the couple immensely during their wedding planning journey. Your timely response contributes to a smooth and enjoyable experience for both the happy couple and their guests.

Follow the couple's instructions

Following the couple's instructions is a key part of responding to a wedding invitation. Wedding planning can be stressful, and RSVPs help couples to finalise everything from catering to seating plans. So, when you're responding, be sure to follow the steps outlined by the couple.

If the couple has requested that you RSVP via their wedding website, don't send a text. If they've asked for the full name of your plus one, don't use a nickname. It's important to follow the instructions provided to avoid confusion or extra work for the couple.

If the invitation includes a separate "RSVP card", fill in all the blank areas and tick the relevant boxes. This will usually include your response (attending or not attending), the number of guests attending, dietary requirements, and any other questions the couple may have included.

If the RSVP card is blank, write a brief personal response. Confirm your name(s), attendance/non-attendance, and any other details requested in the RSVP instructions. Match the tone of your response to the tone of the invitation (formal/informal) and consider your relationship with the couple.

If there's no RSVP card, the couple may have left instructions on how to RSVP online, or they may have included a “details” card with a wedding website. Type the URL from the invitation into your browser and follow the prompts.

If the couple has asked you to RSVP via email, respond using the email address provided on the invitation. Make sure to include your name, the number of people attending or declining, and any other information the couple has requested.

Include your full name

When responding to a wedding invitation, it's important to include your full name and the full name of any additional guests. This is so the couple can create a master guest list, a seating plan, and place cards. It's also useful for the couple to have the full names of all guests in attendance for when they come to creating their wedding photo books and other mementos.

If you are attending the wedding with a plus one, write the titles and full names of all invited guests next to the "M" on the response card. The "M" is an indication that guests should include their proper honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss). If you are not attending, you can skip this part or use the space to write a kind note to the couple.

If you are responding for a group, be sure to include the total number of attendees along with the names of each person. For example:

> "Dear Mr. and Mrs. Richards,

> Thank you for inviting us to attend the marriage of your daughter, Hannah. We are honoured to be included in the celebration and look forward to seeing you at the ceremony on Saturday, June 15th at St. Mary's Church in Little Rock.

> The following 4 people will be attending:

> David Smith

> Rebecca Smith

> Junior Smith

> Michelle Smith – Vegetarian Meal"

If you are filling out a blank RSVP card, a formal response example would be:

> "Mr Harry Smith and Mrs Sally Smith accept with pleasure (or: regret they are unable to accept) your kind invitation for Saturday, 21st September"

While an informal response could look like:

> "Thank you for your invitation, we will both be happily attending! Looking forward to it. Love, Sally and Harry Smith"

> "Thank you for your invitation, sadly we are both unable to attend due to other commitments. So sorry we can't be there – wishing you an amazing day! Love, Sally and Harry Smith"

If you've been instructed to RSVP via email, your response could look like:

> "Dear [Couple's Names],

> We would like to accept with pleasure your kind invitation to your wedding on Saturday, July 25 at 1:00 PM. We gleefully look forward to the event.

> [Your Name(s)]"

If you are unable to attend, you could write:

> "Dear [Couple's Names],

> We would like to thank you for the kind invitation to your wedding on Saturday, July 25 at 1:00 PM. Regrettably, we will be unable to attend due to prior commitments. We wish you the best on your special day!

> [Your Name(s)]"

State your response (attending or not)

When stating your response, it is important to be clear and respond promptly. If you are attending, a simple "yes" or "accept" is sufficient, but you can also add a sentence or two to express your enthusiasm for the event. For example, ""Thank you for your invitation, we will both be happily attending! Looking forward to it."

If you are unable to attend, it is still important to respond as soon as possible and express your regrets. A short note is appropriate, such as "Thank you for inviting us to celebrate with you. We regret that we will not be able to attend your wedding." It is optional to provide a reason for your absence, but it is considerate to do so, especially if you are close with the couple.

In both cases, be sure to include your full name and the total number of guests attending. If there is a space for a personal note, you can write a few sentences to thank the couple and send your well wishes. This is also a good opportunity to disclose any serious allergies or dietary restrictions, if applicable.

Remember to follow the instructions provided by the couple and respond using their preferred method, whether it is a physical response card, email, or online RSVP form.

Include dietary requirements

When responding to an RSVP, it's important to include any dietary requirements you may have. This allows the couple to plan their catering accordingly and ensure that all guests are accommodated for. Here are some tips on how to include dietary requirements in your RSVP response:

Be Timely

It is important to inform the couple of your dietary restrictions when you RSVP. This gives them ample time to plan for your meal needs. Responding promptly is considerate and helpful to the couple as they finalise their wedding plans.

Be Specific

When informing the couple about your dietary requirements, be as specific as possible. Let them know exactly what you can and cannot eat. For example, if you are vegetarian, specify that you do not eat meat, fish, or products that contain animal-derived ingredients. If you have an allergy, be clear about the severity and any potential cross-contamination risks. This helps the couple understand your needs and plan accordingly.

Provide Alternatives

Consider suggesting alternative options that meet your dietary needs. For example, if you are gluten-intolerant, suggest gluten-free alternatives or recommend specific dishes that you can safely consume. This takes the guesswork out of the equation and ensures that your needs are met.

Be Mindful of Preferences vs Requirements

It is important to distinguish between dietary preferences and requirements. A preference may be something you would rather not eat, but you can still consume it without any adverse effects. A requirement, on the other hand, is something you must avoid due to allergies, intolerances, or other health reasons. Be mindful that the couple is trying to accommodate multiple guests, so be clear about the necessity of your request.

Communicate Any Changes

If you forget to include your dietary requirements in your initial RSVP, inform the couple as soon as possible. It is always better to update them beforehand rather than surprising them on the day of the wedding. Similarly, if your dietary needs change after you have already responded, be sure to let them know promptly.

Be Grateful and Understanding

Planning a wedding can be stressful, and accommodating various dietary needs can be challenging. Express your appreciation for the couple's efforts, and be understanding if they don't get it exactly right. They will likely appreciate your gratitude and flexibility.

Frequently asked questions