Rsvp Cards: A Guide To Wedding Invitation Insertion

Wedding RSVP cards are an important part of wedding planning, giving guests a first glimpse of the wedding theme and allowing the couple to finalise their guest list and other details. The cards are usually included in the wedding invitation suite, sent out around two months before the wedding, and should be returned around three to four weeks before the wedding date. This guide will cover everything you need to know about how to put an RSVP card in a wedding invitation, from the essential information to include to creative wording ideas.

How to word your RSVP card

The wording of your RSVP card is crucial to ensuring there are no surprises on your big day. Here are some tips on how to word your RSVP card:

Include the Essentials

The card should typically include the following:

• A clear RSVP deadline for your guests to be mindful of.
• A way for guests to indicate whether they will be attending or not.
• Sufficient space for guests to enter their names and the names of any plus-ones.
• Any dietary requirements.

Add More Information

You may also want to include additional information such as your contact details, the dress code, or a phone number and email address. You can also remind guests of the URL of your wedding website.

Leave Some Blank Space

Encourage your guests to get creative by leaving some space on the RSVP card. They can write special accommodation requests or share their excitement for the upcoming celebrations.

Create a Spreadsheet

To stay organized, create a spreadsheet where each invite sent corresponds to a number. Then, subtly pencil in that number on the back of the RSVP card. This way, you can easily match each response to the correct guest, even if their name is missing or tricky to read.

Break the Traditions

While the traditional wording for an RSVP is "Accepts With Pleasure/Regretfully Declines", you can add a personal touch by changing the wording, adding different requests, or including a fun and quirky design.

Add a Flair of Creativity

The RSVP cards are a great way to inject your personality and style. Embrace your theme or aesthetic and add unique touches, such as asking guests fun questions or requesting song suggestions.

The RSVP Deadline

It is recommended to set the RSVP deadline for one month before the wedding date. This will give you enough time to finalize the details with your vendors. If you are having a destination wedding, it is advisable to set the deadline two months before the wedding to allow guests enough time to confirm their travel plans.

The RSVP Request

At the top of the RSVP card, include the request "Répondez s'il vous plaît" (RSVP) or "The favor of your reply is requested." This is a polite way to ask your guests to respond to your invitation.

The Names

Provide a line for your guests to write their names and the names of any plus-ones. It is customary to precede this line with an "M" to indicate that guests should include their proper honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss).

The Number Attending

Include a line to know how many people are attending. If you wish to limit the number of guests, you can politely communicate this by writing, "We have reserved ____ seat(s) in your honor."

The Meal Choices

If you are offering meal choices, include a section for guests to initial their entrée selection. This will help you determine how many entrées of each meal you will need.

The Dietary Restrictions

Some guests may have dietary restrictions or allergies. Provide a line for them to specify any dietary needs, such as "Please let us know if you have any dietary restrictions/allergies."

Additional Wording

You may want to include additional wording or requests if there is room on the RSVP card. For example, you can ask for song requests or leave space for guests to write a note for the couple.

The Online RSVP Wording

If you have a wedding website for guests to respond to, be clear on your RSVP card. Include the website link and a statement such as "Kindly respond by [date] using the following website."

The RSVP Envelope

The response card envelope should be addressed to the person in charge of the guest list, whether it's you, your family, or your wedding planner. Don't forget to include a stamp on the envelope for your guests' convenience.

What to include on the card

When it comes to what to include on your RSVP card, there are a few key pieces of information that your guests will need to provide. Here's a breakdown of the essential elements:

Space for Guest Names

Begin with a long blank line starting with a printed "M" where guests can write their names and the names of any additional guests, such as a spouse, date, or children. This information will be crucial for creating your final guest list and place cards. Alternatively, you can opt for a more modern approach by printing "Name:" before the blank line.

RSVP Deadline Date

Prominently display the date by which you need your guests' responses. This creates a sense of urgency and ensures timely replies. You can choose between formal and casual wording options, such as "The favour of a reply is requested by" for a more formal tone or simply "RSVP by" for a casual vibe.

Accept or Decline Options

Allow guests to indicate whether they will be attending or not. This section can be formatted as checkboxes, circling, or fill-in-the-blank lines. Be creative and feel free to tie these responses into your wedding theme. For a formal option, leave the card blank except for the RSVP deadline date, letting guests fill in their responses.

Meal Choices and Dietary Restrictions

If you're serving a sit-down dinner, include a section for guests to select their entrée choices. Be considerate of food allergies and dietary restrictions. Include a line for guests to specify any serious allergies or special requests. This information will be valuable for the venue's chef and catering team.

Additional Information

Depending on your wedding plans, you may want to include other details on your RSVP card. For example, if you're hosting a post-celebration brunch, ask guests to reply to this additional event for an accurate headcount. If you have out-of-town guests, consider including a line for them to specify their accommodation arrangements or travel plans.

Remember, your RSVP cards are an opportunity to showcase your personality and give your guests a sneak peek of your wedding theme. Be creative with your wording and feel free to add a fun twist to your responses!

How to address the envelopes

When addressing the envelopes for your wedding invitations, it's important to consider the level of formality of your wedding, as well as the specific titles and relationships of your invitees. Here are some detailed guidelines on how to address the envelopes for your wedding invitations:

Formal Addressing Rules:

If you're having a formal or black-tie wedding, follow these rules:

• Use full, formal names and avoid nicknames.
• Middle names aren't necessary, but if you include them, spell them out in full (no initials).
• Spell out all address descriptors, such as "Street" or "Avenue."
• Abbreviate titles like "Mr.", "Mrs.", "Ms.", and "Jr."
• Write out professional titles like "Doctor" or "Professor."

Addressing Married Couples:

When addressing married couples, you have a few options:

• Use both partners' titles followed by their names: "Mr. John and Mrs. Susan Smith."
• Address them with the wife's name first: "Mrs. Susan and Mr. John Smith."
• If the wife has kept her maiden name, use "Ms.": "Mr. John Smith and Ms. Susan Johnson."

Addressing Unmarried Couples:

For unmarried couples with different last names, the invitation can be addressed to:

• "Ms. Susan Smith and Mr. Paul Jones."
• Or, "Mr. Paul Jones and Ms. Susan Smith."

Addressing Couples with Distinguished Titles:

If one or both of the invitees have distinguished titles, such as "Doctor", include them in the address:

• "Mr. John and Dr. Susan Smith."
• If the husband is the doctor, the format is: "Doctor and Mrs. John Smith."
• For two doctors, use: "The Doctors Smith."

Addressing Families:

When inviting a family with children, you can address the envelope to:

• "Mr. and Mrs. Anthony James and Family."
• For a more personalised touch, list the children's names: "Mr. John and Mrs. Susan Smith, Miss Emily Smith, Mr. Charlie Smith."
• If the children are over 18, they should receive separate invitations.

Addressing Single Guests with a Plus One:

If you're inviting a single guest and they are welcome to bring a guest, address the envelope to:

• "Ms. Susan Smith and Guest."
• If you know the name of their plus one, include it: "Ms. Susan Smith and Mr. Thomas Jones."

Other Considerations:

• Always use proper titles and full names, especially for older guests or those with professional titles.
• Avoid using abbreviations, except for titles and "Jr."
• If your wedding is casual, you may use first names only for younger or close friends.
• Avoid printing address labels, as they may look corporate and uninspired.
• Consider hiring a calligrapher or using custom-printed labels for a sophisticated touch.

When to send out your RSVP cards

Timeline for Sending RSVP Cards

It is standard etiquette to send out RSVP cards with your wedding invitations, six to eight weeks before the wedding. This gives guests enough time to finalise their plans and make travel arrangements if necessary. The RSVP deadline should then be set for three to four weeks before the wedding date. This allows you to confirm numbers with your caterers and finalise your seating plan.

Make it Easy for Your Guests

To ensure a timely response, it is considerate to include a pre-addressed and pre-stamped envelope with your RSVP cards. This small gesture removes any barriers for your guests and makes it more likely that they will respond promptly.

Digital Options

While mailed responses are traditional, it is becoming more common to offer digital options for RSVPs. This can be a good way to ensure you receive responses from guests who may be less tech-savvy or less likely to respond by post. You could include your wedding website or an email address for digital responses.

Clear Wording

Make sure your RSVP cards clearly state the deadline for responses and that guests understand a response is needed, even if they are declining the invitation. A simple "The favour of your reply is requested by [insert date]" can be clearer than "RSVP".

Additional Information

You may also want to include a line for guests to indicate their meal choices, if relevant, and any dietary requirements. You could also add a fun call to action, such as requesting a song that will get them on the dance floor or their favourite memory of the couple.

What to do if guests don't RSVP

When it comes to wedding planning, one of the most frustrating aspects is dealing with guests who don't RSVP. Here are some instructive steps to handle this situation with grace and ensure you get the responses you need:

Step 1: Take a Breath

It can be infuriating when guests don't respond within the given timeframe, especially considering how simple the task may seem. It's important to remember that people lead busy lives, and some may have simply forgotten or misplaced the RSVP card. Take a moment to breathe and refrain from immediate reactions driven by frustration.

Step 2: Allow Some Extra Time

If you've provided physical RSVP cards to be mailed back, give your guests a few extra days beyond the deadline. There's a chance their responses were posted just before the cutoff date, and postal delays could be the reason for the delay.

Step 3: Start Making Calls

Once you've allowed sufficient time for mailed responses, pick up the phone and start contacting those who haven't replied. Approach these conversations calmly and politely. Ask if they received your invitation and gently inquire if they could let you know of their plans to attend. Mention that you need to provide final numbers to the venue and caterer, adding a sense of urgency to their response.

Step 4: Utilize Email and Text

If you're unable to reach guests by phone, leave a voicemail and follow up with a text message or email. Maintain a friendly tone, but be more direct about the need for a response by a specific date. Let them know that if you don't hear back, you'll assume they are unable to attend. Remember to send individual messages instead of group texts or emails.

Step 5: Meet in Person (Optional)

For very important guests, such as close family members or friends, consider paying them a visit in person if other methods of contact have failed. Emphasize that you need their response for planning purposes and that their attendance is important to you.

Step 6: Assume Non-Attendance

If, after all your efforts, certain guests still haven't responded by the caterer's deadline, it's reasonable to assume they aren't coming. You may choose to send a final text or email informing them of this assumption and giving them one last chance to respond. However, at this point, you must finalize your guest list and table plan.

Remember, while it's essential to be considerate and patient, your wedding planning depends on accurate numbers. Stay polite and calm, but be persistent in your pursuit of those elusive RSVPs!

Frequently asked questions