Planning A Second Wedding: A Guide For Your Next Chapter

Planning a second wedding can be exciting, but it may also bring up some questions about what's considered appropriate. The good news is that it's your wedding, and you get to decide what works for you and your partner. You can keep it small and intimate, or go all out with a huge celebration. You can wear a white dress or a colourful tuxedo. You can even have a bridal shower, bachelor or bachelorette party if you want! The options are endless.

- Be mindful of your guests' availability and give them plenty of notice about the wedding date.

- Feel free to include or exclude any wedding traditions, such as a bouquet toss or religious reading, based on your preferences.

- If you have children, involve them in the ceremony.

- Choose who speaks during the toasting carefully, and communicate your expectations and concerns with them.

- Consider a destination wedding or a unique venue to keep the guest list small and save money.

- Incorporate your family in new ways, such as a family sand ceremony or including their favourite music in the festivities.

Guest list and invitations

Planning the guest list and sending out invitations for your second wedding can be a tricky process. It is completely your choice who you invite, but it's worth keeping in mind that your guests may have less availability than they did when you were married the first time. This could be due to a number of factors, such as having kids, extracurricular activities, intense careers, and limited vacation time. Therefore, it is a good idea to let people know your wedding date as early as possible so that they can plan accordingly.

If you are having a destination wedding, this may help to keep your guest list small. It will also save you money if you plan to host your wedding in the same area or location as your honeymoon. However, if your guests paid thousands of dollars to attend a destination wedding the first time around, it might not be fair to ask them to do so again.

You may also want to consider relaxing some of the formalities related to guests. For example, you might want to skip having your father walk you down the aisle and opt for a family sand ceremony instead, or incorporate some of his favorite music into the festivities. If you have kids, a second wedding offers plenty of opportunities for them to participate in the ceremony.

When it comes to the invitations themselves, you can send them out online. You can also choose to include or forgo any traditional pre-wedding events, such as a bridal shower, bachelor or bachelorette party, or engagement party. It is completely up to you and your partner.

Attire

When it comes to attire, there are no rules for second weddings. You can wear whatever you like, whether that's a traditional white wedding dress, a colourful tuxedo, or something else entirely. If you want to wear white, don't be put off by the old "rule" that brides can't wear white to a second wedding. This is outdated advice, and you should feel free to wear whatever makes you feel most comfortable and confident.

That being said, your second wedding is a chance to try something different. If you wore a traditional white gown or black tux the first time around, you might want to switch it up and try a different style of dress or even a pantsuit. You could also consider a destination wedding, which is a great option for keeping your guest list small and can double up as your honeymoon location, saving you money.

If you're having a bridal party, you might want to consider what they will wear. You could ask your bridesmaids to choose their own dresses in a particular colour or fabric, or you could pick a style that suits everyone. The same goes for groomsmen: they can wear matching suits or a particular colour scheme that complements the bridesmaids' outfits.

Finally, don't feel pressured to have a traditional wedding registry. Chances are, you and your partner already have everything you need, so you could consider a creative registry for something you really want, or even a charity donation registry.

Pre-wedding events

If you are having a destination wedding, your guests may have less availability than they did for your first wedding, especially if they have kids, busy careers, or limited vacation time. So, it's a good idea to let people know the wedding date as early as possible.

You may also want to consider relaxing some of the formalities related to guests. For example, if guests spent a lot of money to attend your last wedding, it might not be fair to ask them to do so again.

Your second wedding is a chance to incorporate your family in new and meaningful ways. For example, if your father has already walked you down the aisle, you might want to skip that tradition and opt for a family sand ceremony instead. If you have kids, they can also participate in the ceremony.

When it comes to attire, your second wedding is an opportunity to choose something different. You can wear white if you want to, but you might prefer to switch it up with a different style of gown or even a pantsuit.

Wedding ceremony

Planning a wedding ceremony can be stressful, but it is important to remember that the day is about love and celebrating your new life together. Here are some tips to help you plan your second wedding ceremony:

Venue and Guest List

First, decide on the type of ceremony you want, whether it be a destination wedding, a backyard gathering, or an intimate ceremony. Consider the time of day, season, and location when selecting your venue. If you want to break away from tradition, you could book your favourite restaurant, or even a theme park, museum, or gallery. Next, create a guest list that includes only close family and friends who will appreciate the occasion.

Budget and Theme

Create a budget and decide on a unique theme that reflects your personalities and interests. Consider DIY projects, deals and discounts, and ask friends and family to help.

Food and Drink

Food and drink options can be a great way to make your wedding unique. You could book food trucks to serve your guests, ask everyone to bring a dish for a potluck-style dinner, or choose a buffet-style meal that is easy to prepare and serve. Create your own cocktail and mocktail menu, or set out bottles of your favourite wine for guests to enjoy.

Involving Family

If you or your spouse-to-be have children, there are plenty of opportunities for them to participate in the ceremony. They could be flower girls, ring bearers, bridesmaids, or groomsmen, or they could share readings during the ceremony. A popular ritual for second weddings is a family unity ceremony, such as a sand ceremony, which involves each family member pouring coloured sand into a jar to represent the new family coming together.

Clothing and Accessories

There are no hard and fast rules when it comes to what to wear to a second wedding. You should feel free to wear whatever makes you feel beautiful and confident. If you want to wear a white dress, that's okay too! With a second wedding, you may want to switch things up and choose a different style of gown or even a pantsuit. Veils have traditionally symbolised modesty and purity, so some brides may choose to do without this accessory.

Music and Photography

You can pick whatever music you want for your ceremony, so feel free to walk down the aisle to something less traditional if that's what you prefer. You could also consider having an 'Unplugged Ceremony', where you politely ask guests to refrain from taking photos during the ceremony so that they can relax and immerse themselves in the moment.

Gifts and registry

When it comes to gifts and registries, couples planning a second wedding may already have many of the things that are usually included on a traditional registry, such as towels and kitchen appliances. However, this doesn't mean that you can't create a registry or that guests won't want to bring gifts. You can create a registry for something you want or need, or you can opt for a creative registry, such as a honeymoon fund or donations to a chosen charity.

If you're looking for unique and memorable ways to celebrate your second wedding, consider incorporating a gift exchange during the ceremony or planning an alternative-style dinner with your caterer if you know your guests would prefer something other than a traditional four-course meal.

Your second wedding is a chance to express yourself and celebrate your relationship. You can make it as unique as you like, forgoing traditional aspects to make the day more personalised and meaningful. For example, if your father walked you down the aisle at your first wedding, you might want to skip this tradition and opt for a family sand ceremony instead or incorporate his favourite music into the festivities.

Ultimately, the options are endless, and you can plan a wedding that suits you and your partner's personalities and preferences.

Frequently asked questions