The Perfect Wedding Invitation: Packing Your Rsvp

When it comes to wedding invitations, there's a lot to consider, from the font and colour to the weight and texture of the paper. But one of the most important elements is the RSVP card, which gives your guests a taste of your theme and helps you finalise your guest list and plan your big day. Here's a guide on how to pack the RSVP in your wedding invitation to ensure a smooth planning process and an enjoyable experience for your guests.

The RSVP card should be placed face-up under the flap of the envelope

When it comes to wedding invitations, the general rule for assembling your stationery is to order the inserts by size, with the largest card going in first, followed by the rest of the enclosure cards in descending order.

The RSVP card is an important part of your wedding stationery suite. It allows your guests to confirm their attendance or otherwise and provide other necessary information, such as dietary requirements or song requests. It is also useful for you and your vendors to get a final headcount for planning purposes, such as how much food you will need or how many napkins to rent.

To make the RSVP process as smooth as possible for your guests and for you, here are some additional tips:

• Provide a pre-addressed and pre-stamped envelope with each RSVP card. This courteous gesture will increase the likelihood of your guests returning the cards promptly.
• Set an RSVP deadline of around two to four weeks before the wedding date. This will give you and your vendors enough time to finalise any last-minute details that depend on the guest count.
• Make sure your guests know when and how to RSVP. If you are collecting responses by mail, include a stamped envelope. If you are collecting responses online, provide the relevant URL and instructions.
• Consider including an "M" at the start of the line where guests are expected to write their names. This indicates that they should include their proper honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss) before their name.
• If you are offering meal choices at the reception, include entrée selections on the RSVP card.
• If you are expecting guests to bring their children, make sure their names are included on the invitation envelope or RSVP card.
• If you are not offering plus-ones, do not include "and Guest" or "+1" after your guests' names.

Include a pre-addressed and stamped envelope

Including a pre-addressed and stamped envelope with your wedding invitation is a courteous gesture that also helps ensure your guests' timely response. Here are some tips and guidelines for including these envelopes:

Pre-addressed Envelope

The outer envelope, which is stamped and addressed, should include the name(s) and address of the person(s) handling the RSVPs. This could be you, your fiancé(e), a family member, or a member of the wedding party. If you are handling the RSVPs yourself, you can address the envelope with both your full names or just one person's name if you live separately. A cute alternative is to use "The future [insert last name(s)]" if you plan to share a last name.

For a more formal invitation, write out the recipient's full name(s), including their personal title(s) such as Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss. However, if personal titles feel restrictive or exclusive, you can opt for a more modern approach by using only first and last names. Remember to double-check each attendee's preferred personal title before including them on the envelope. If you are inviting a couple, put their names on the same line, with the person you are closest to listed first or in alphabetical order if you are equally close to both.

If you are inviting a family, the outer envelope can be addressed to the whole family, such as "The [Last Name] Family," or include the parents' names followed by "& Family." If you want to specify which family members are invited, list the parents' names on the first line and the children's names on the second line.

Pre-stamped Envelope

Including a stamp on the envelope is a thoughtful touch that makes it easier for your guests to respond promptly. Using the same stamp as your main invitation helps maintain a cohesive wedding theme.

Inner Envelope

The inner envelope, which is optional, is more informal and includes the names of the invitees. It is usually placed inside the outer envelope to keep the invitation pristine. The inner envelope typically only includes the couple's title and last names, such as "Mr. and Mrs. [Last Name]." For unmarried couples, list both names on one line or separate lines, depending on space.

Additional Considerations

When addressing envelopes, it is essential to use the correct titles and spelling of your guests' names. For single female guests over 18, use "Ms.," while for those under 18, use "Miss." For single male guests over 18, use "Mr.," while those under 18 do not need a title.

If you are inviting a married couple with different last names, write out their full names, with the woman's name first, followed by the man's name. If the combined names are too long, list them separately. For same-sex couples, address them with the appropriate prefixes, such as Mrs., Mr., or Mx.

In the case of distinguished titles, such as doctors, lawyers, judges, or military personnel, address them by their title on the envelope. If both guests have special titles, list them alphabetically or with the higher-ranking title first.

Remember to give yourself enough time to organize your guest list and addressing envelopes to ensure your invitations are sent out on time.

Make sure to include a deadline

When it comes to wedding invitations, it's important to set an RSVP deadline to ensure you can finalise the details with your vendors. Here are some tips to make sure your guests respond on time:

The RSVP deadline is a crucial element of your wedding invitation suite. It should be featured prominently on the card, with wording such as "Kindly reply by [insert date]" or "Please respond by [insert date]". This date is important for both you and your guests. For you, it means you can finalise numbers with your caterers and other vendors, and for your guests, it gives them a clear timeframe to work within.

The deadline should be set for around three to four weeks before the wedding. This gives you enough time to chase up any stragglers and get a final headcount for your vendors. It's also not so early that your guests might have forgotten about it, and not so late that they might have already made other plans.

If you're having a destination wedding, you'll want to give your guests more time, so set the RSVP deadline for about two months before the wedding, and send out the invitations four months in advance.

Make it Easy for Your Guests

To ensure a timely response, it's a good idea to include a pre-addressed, pre-stamped envelope with your invitations. This makes it as simple as possible for your guests to pop their responses in the mail. You could also include a digital RSVP option via your wedding website, giving your guests an alternative method to respond.

Be Clear in Your Wording

Some guests may not be familiar with the term 'RSVP', so consider using alternative wording to ensure a timely response. For example, "The favour of your reply is requested by [insert date]" makes it clear that you're asking for a response, and when you need it by.

Add a Fun Twist

Including an engaging call to action on your RSVP card can encourage guests to respond promptly. For instance, "RSVP with a song that will keep you on the dance floor" or "RSVP with your favourite memory of the bride and groom". This not only prompts a response but also adds a personal touch to the process.

Reminders

It's a good idea to send out a friendly reminder about a week before the RSVP deadline. This can be done via a quick wedding website update, a text, or a phone call. This will help ensure you get responses from everyone, and on time!

Include a place for guests to write their names

Including a place for guests to write their names on your wedding RSVP cards is essential for several reasons. Firstly, it guarantees that you know who is attending your wedding. Secondly, it ensures that you can correctly spell everyone's names on items such as the seating chart, place cards, escort cards, or personalised favours.

• On formal RSVP cards, it is customary to write "M" at the start of the line, indicating that guests should include their proper honorific (Mr., Mrs., Ms., or Miss) before their names. This is especially important if you plan to use titles and names on other wedding stationery, such as place cards or escort cards.
• If the invitation envelope includes the names of specific individuals, ensure there is enough space for guests to write the full names of all invited guests. This is important for the couple to get an accurate headcount and create personalised items such as place cards.
• If you are offering a choice of entrees, it is helpful to include a line for guests to write their initials next to their meal selection. This makes it easier for the couple to finalise catering details and ensure that each guest receives their preferred meal option.
• Consider including an "M" followed by a blank space, where guests can write their social title (Mrs./Mr./Ms./Mx.) followed by their full name. This is a common format for formal RSVP cards and ensures that guests provide their full names.
• If you have a specific format for how you would like guests' names to be written, such as including titles and full names, you can include this instruction on the RSVP card. For example, "Please write full names, including titles (Mr., Mrs., Ms.), as they appear on the invitation envelope."
• If you are providing a pre-printed response card, clearly indicate where guests should write their names, such as "Name(s): [blank space]." This ensures that guests know where to provide their information.
• If you are using digital RSVPs or a wedding website, ensure that there is a designated field for guests to write their full names. This information is crucial for the couple's planning and should be easily accessible.
• If you are using a more free-form style RSVP card without designated fields, gently remind guests to include their full names in their responses. You can include a prompt or instruction at the top of the card, such as "Please include full names and the number of guests attending."

Add a place for guests to choose their meal

Adding a place for guests to choose their meal on an RSVP card is a great way to streamline your wedding planning and make your guests feel considered. It is especially useful if you are having a seated dinner with menu options. Here are some tips on how to include this on your RSVP card:

Finalize Your Menu Options:

Before you can ask your guests to choose their meal, you need to decide on your menu options and confirm your catering company. You may want to include only the main course options, or you may also want to include starter, dessert, or children's meal options.

Provide a Clear Format:

On your RSVP card, clearly indicate how guests should select their meal choice. You can add a food choice section to the response card or include a separate enclosure card in your invitation suite. Provide enough space for guests to write their initials or full names next to their chosen option. You could also include a separate line for each invited guest, where they can write their name, indicate their attendance, and circle or check their meal choice.

Be Creative:

While the food choice section serves a practical purpose, you can still get creative with it. Instead of just listing the options, you could include more detailed descriptions or use pictures to represent each menu selection. For example, instead of just "beef," you could say "filet mignon," or include a small icon of a cow.

Collect Dietary Restrictions:

In addition to meal choices, it is a good idea to ask about any food allergies or dietary restrictions. This will ensure that everyone will have something to eat on the day. Include a line for guests to write down any allergies or restrictions, such as "Please advise of any food allergies: ___________".

Online RSVP Forms:

If you are using an online RSVP form as part of your wedding website, you can easily include meal choices and dietary restrictions. This method saves paper and may be more convenient for your guests. You can also use RSVP Reports to scan all the meal selections and forward this information to your wedding venue.

Remember, while including meal choices on your RSVP card was once considered "tacky," it is now a common and practical way to gather important information for your wedding planning. It will help your caterers prepare the right amount of food and ensure a smooth dining experience for your guests.

Frequently asked questions