Wedding vows are the crux of your wedding day, the very reason you've gathered friends and family to celebrate. While some couples choose to utter traditional vows based on their religion or culture, others decide to write personalised messages to their future spouse.
Writing your own wedding vows can be a daunting task. Condensing all your memories, love, and hopes for your partner into a few minutes isn't easy, so professional vow writers advise taking your time with the process. Here are some tips to help you write your own wedding vows.
Start early
Begin brainstorming up to three months before the wedding so you aren't overwhelmed by other planning tasks. Give yourself as much time as possible.
Reflect on your relationship
Do a brain dump of memories and moments you've shared. Why do you want to marry this person? What incredible experiences have you had together, and how do you see your future?
Keep it simple
Brevity is best, so make your vows short and sweet. A good vow outline includes:
- Capturing the moment: Write a sentence that describes how you feel.
- Focusing on your partner: Write a few sentences that describe what you love and appreciate about them.
- Listing your vows: Include three to six specific promises.
- Closing with a wish for your future: Write a sentence or two about what makes you most excited for your future together.
Edit and practice
Your first draft will likely include details that aren't necessary. Read your vows out loud and listen to someone else read them to get a fresh perspective. Practising will also help you make sure the length is correct.
Communicate with your partner
Discuss the length, tone, and structure of your vows with your partner so you're on the same page.
Seek inspiration
If you're stuck, seek inspiration from pop culture, such as movies, TV shows, books, and songs.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Length | 2-5 minutes |
Tone | Humorous, romantic, religious, etc. |
Structure | Free format, or a simple vow outline |
Content | Love, admiration, anecdotes, promises, future vision |
What You'll Learn
Capture the moment
Capturing the moment is an important part of your wedding vows. It is a way to express your love and commitment to your partner in front of your friends and family. Here are some tips and examples to help you craft your own unique and meaningful vows:
Tips for Capturing the Moment:
- Follow a Simple Vow Outline: Organize your thoughts and structure your vows using an outline. This will help you stay focused and concise while ensuring your vows are not too long.
- Capture the Moment: Start by writing a sentence or two that describes your feelings in the present moment. You can also include a flashback to the journey that led you to this day. For example, "It took one swipe right to change my life, and today, it will take just two simple words to commit my life to you."
- Focus on Your Fiancé: Write a few sentences expressing what you love and appreciate about your partner. Highlight their positive qualities and how they inspire you. For instance, "Your caring nature, kind heart, and endless patience continuously inspire me to be a better person and partner for you."
- Share Real Promises: Make concrete promises that are meaningful and realistic. These can be serious, such as vowing to support each other through thick and thin, or more lighthearted, like promising to always watch your partner's favourite TV show with them.
- Close with a Wish for Your Future: Express your excitement for your future together and don't forget to say "I love you." For example, "I can't wait to create more memories with you as we begin our married life. I love you, and I am excited for all that the future holds for us."
Examples of Capturing the Moment:
- "You held my hand for the first time during that middle school dance, and now you'll hold my heart forever."
- "I, Stefano/James, take you, James/Stefano, to be my husband. When you need a friend, I will be your best friend. When you need help, I will be there for you. When you need care, I will support you. When you want to try something new, I will encourage you. And when you do the same for me, I will appreciate you. But if you don't, I will forgive you. Every day. For the rest of my life."
- "I love you with my whole heart, with a passion that can't be expressed in words but through kisses, glances, and years of adventure by your side."
- "I promise to be your navigator, best friend, and wife. I promise to honour, love, and cherish you through all life's adventures. Wherever we go, we'll go together."
- "I promise to be there when your hair turns grey, your face wrinkles, and life around us looks different. I cannot promise that life will be perfect, but I can promise that it will be a perfect life lived with you, pursuing the Lord until the end of our days."
A Grand Wedding Gesture: Creating a Large Cross
You may want to see also
Focus on your partner
The key to writing wedding vows that capture your love story in a concise way is to organize your thoughts. Here are some tips and examples to help you write your vows while focusing on your partner.
Tip #1: Follow a Simple Vow Outline
Using a vow outline will add structure, create flow, and ensure the length doesn’t run on with unnecessary details.
Capture the Moment
Write one sentence that describes how you feel at this moment. You can also flashback to the journey that led you here.
Example: "It took one swipe right to change my life, and today, it will take just two simple words to commit my life to you."
Focus on Your Fiancé
Write one to three sentences that describe what you love and appreciate about your fiancé.
Example: "Your caring nature, kind heart, and endless patience continuously inspire me to be a better person and partner for you. I’ve never felt a trust like ours, or a love like yours. And I’m thankful that from this day forward, I’ll always have your beautiful smile to wake up to."
List Your Vows
Include three to five specific promises. Most should be serious, but feel free to include one or two playful promises if you’re going for funny wedding vows.
Close with a Wish for Your Future
Write one to two sentences that describe what makes you most excited about your future as a married couple. And don’t forget to say "I love you."
Tip #2: Edit Your Vows
Your first draft will likely include details that aren’t as impactful or are unnecessary. To achieve succinct vows, focus on editing the original draft.
- Read your vows out loud. Does any of the verbiage trip up your delivery? Do certain phrases not feel natural to your speaking pattern? Do you hear ideas that sound redundant?
- Listen to someone else read your vows. This will provide you with a new perspective.
- Use different coloured highlighters to highlight the various sections of the outline. This will help you to visually see if you’ve captured each section with equal weight. Then you can adjust as necessary.
Tip #3: Practice Reciting Your Vows
Practising reciting your vows out loud will help you to make sure the length is correct. Use a timer when you recite your vows to determine the length. Make sure your timer can display the length down to the second.
Tip #4: Communicate Your Vow Goals with Your Fiancé
You may want to write short vows, but what if they plan to write vows that are five minutes long? Make sure you and your fiancé share the same vision for your vows.
- Length: What is the time you agree your vows should be? 30 seconds? 90 seconds? Two minutes?
- Tone: What is the vibe you want your vows to have? A mix of funny and sweet? Mostly humorous vows or strictly romantic vows?
- Structure: Share a vow-writing outline with your fiancé so you are both referencing the same guide.
Tip #5: Use a Vow Booklet
Just because your vows are short doesn’t mean that they don’t deserve to be packaged in a pretty way. Beautiful vow booklets are the perfect place to write your short wedding vows. They’ll also make for elegant details in your wedding photographs. And you’ll have a special keepsake to refer to for many years to come.
Tip #6: Consult with a Vow Writer
Just because your vows are going to be short does not mean that they will be easy to write. In most cases, it’s actually harder to write short vows. After all, how do you communicate such big emotions and ideas in so few sentences? If you’re struggling to capture your love story in a short yet meaningful way, consider consulting with a professional wedding vow writer.
Short and Simple Vow Examples
Sweet and Simple Wedding Vow Example
"You held my hand for the first time during that middle school dance, and now you’ll carry my heart forever.
Your love makes me feel like any dream I have can be fully realized, any fear I have can be minimized, and any step I take will be made better because it’s alongside you.
You are my best friend, my one true love, my husband, and I make these vows to you:
I promise to provide you with constant care, support, and comfort.
I promise to make you laugh, make you feel secure, and make your favourite chocolate chip cookies.
And I promise to love you as fiercely, deeply, and passionately as you’ve always loved me.
I can’t wait to create more memories with you as we begin this marriage. I love you."
Short and To The Point Wedding Vow Example
"The first time I saw you smile, I saw my future. Now I can’t wait to step into that future with you today.
With your sweet spirit, kind heart, and thoughtful nature, you bring my life more meaning, joy, and laughter.
With you by my side, I promise that any challenge we experience will be tackled as one team.
I promise to grow from every disagreement and to celebrate every joy.
I promise to remind you every day why you’re the most wonderful woman I’ve ever known.
And I promise to love you with everything I have and everything I am.
Cass, I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life giving you countless reasons to smile. I love you and I’ll continue loving you for all of my days."
Creating a Wedding Wheel: Guide to Planning Your Big Day
You may want to see also
List your vows
Serious Vows
- I promise to always respect you, both in name and faith.
- I vow to be your support and encouragement in times of despair and times of prosperity.
- I vow to be there when your hair turns grey, your face wrinkles, and life around us looks different.
- I promise to be your navigator, best friend, and wife. I promise to honour, love, and cherish you through all life's adventures.
- I promise to be your honest, faithful, and loving wife for the rest of my days.
- I vow to always protect you from harm, to stand with you against your troubles, and to look to you when I need protection.
- I promise to be your guiding light in the darkness, a warming comfort in the cold, and a shoulder to lean on when life is too much to bear on your own.
- I promise to be your biggest fan and supporter in every aspect of life.
- I promise to listen, I promise to be patient, and I promise to treat you with nothing but respect and kindness.
- I promise to love you for who you are, and for who you are yet to become.
- I vow to put your needs before my own.
- I vow to be the man that you inspire me to be and the man that you deserve.
Humorous Vows
- I promise to feign an interest in cricket for the rest of our days.
- I promise to always unclog the tub, even though you are the only one of us with long hair.
- I promise to continue to make your friends jealous of our amazing relationship.
- I promise to pretend to be interested in whatever PlayStation game you’re playing even though I have no idea what you are talking about.
Planning a Wedding: Budgeting for the Big Day
You may want to see also
Close with a wish for your future
As you close your wedding vows, you should write one to two sentences that describe what makes you most excited for your future as a married couple. It is also important to express your love for your partner. Here are some examples:
> "I can't wait to create more memories with you as we begin this marriage. I love you."
> "I can't wait to spend the rest of my life giving you countless reasons to smile. I love you and I'll continue loving you for all of my days."
> "I promise to love you for eternity and to trust you with my credit card."
> "I promise to be there to catch you if you should stumble, carry you over every threshold, and fall in love with you every day."
> "I promise to be your navigator, best friend, and wife. I promise to honour, love, and cherish you through all life's adventures. Wherever we go, we'll go together."
Crafting a Beautiful Wedding Cake: A Step-by-Step Guide
You may want to see also
Edit your vows
Editing your wedding vows is an important step in the process of writing your own. Here are some tips to help you refine your vows:
Read your vows out loud
Does the wording feel unnatural? Are there phrases that trip you up? Are there redundant ideas? Reading your vows aloud will help you identify areas that need to be reworked.
Listen to someone else read your vows
Hearing your words from a different perspective can help you identify areas that need to be reworded or reworked.
Use highlighters to identify key sections
Use different coloured highlighters to highlight the various sections of your vows. For example, use orange to highlight your promises and pink to highlight your wishes for the future. This will help you ensure that you've given equal weight to each section.
Practice reciting your vows
Practising your vows will help you refine them and ensure they are the correct length. Use a timer to determine the length, and make sure it can display the length down to the second.
Creating a Mexican Wedding Lasso: Traditions and Steps
You may want to see also