Too Many Bridesmaids: When To Draw The Line

Choosing your bridesmaids is one of the most exciting parts of planning a wedding. But how many is too many? While there's no one-size-fits-all answer, it's worth considering the impact that a large bridal party will have on the rest of your wedding.

The number of bridesmaids you choose should reflect your relationships and your vision for your wedding. If you want a small, intimate group, three bridesmaids is a popular choice for creating a visually appealing lineup that balances the bride and groom. But if you have more than three close friends or family members you want to include, you can absolutely have a larger bridal squad.

There are benefits to having more bridesmaids. It means no one gets left out, you can take amazing group photos, and there are more hands to help with wedding planning tasks. However, having too many bridesmaids can also bring unnecessary stress and expense. It's important to trust your instincts and prioritise yourself when making your decision.

Budget

Being a bridesmaid is a huge honour, but it can also be a major financial commitment. The cost of being a bridesmaid can vary depending on the bride and the wedding, but it's important to be mindful of the budget, especially if your bridesmaids are at different stages in their lives or have different income levels. Here are some tips to help you navigate the financial aspects of having bridesmaids:

Dresses and Alterations

One of the most significant expenses for bridesmaids is the dress and accessories. The cost of a bridesmaid dress can range from $130 to $500, with the average being around $208. Alterations can add an additional $30 to $100, depending on how extensive they are. To save money, consider choosing a dress within a specific colour scheme that your bridesmaids can wear again, or look for pre-owned or rental options.

Hair and Makeup

If you're requiring your bridesmaids to have their hair and makeup professionally done, it's considerate to cover the bill as a gift. If you're unable to do so, discuss this expectation with your bridesmaids ahead of time, so they can decide if they want to incur this cost. The cost of hair and makeup can vary depending on the location and complexity of the styles but expect to pay at least $80 per person for each service.

Bridal Shower and Bachelorette Party

Bridesmaids are typically expected to contribute to the cost of the bridal shower and bachelorette party, which can include decorations, food, drinks, activities, and transportation. These costs can quickly add up, especially if the bachelorette party is a destination event. Be transparent about your budget for these events and encourage your bridesmaids to do the same. If you're unable to attend all the events, it's perfectly acceptable to contribute a small amount or find another way to celebrate the bride.

Travel and Accommodations

If your bridesmaids need to travel for the wedding, they will incur costs for transportation and accommodations. These expenses can range from $50 for gas to $700 for flights and hotels, depending on the destination. To save money, encourage carpooling or sharing rooms, and look for affordable travel options by booking in advance.

Gifts for the Bride and Groom

It is customary for bridesmaids to give a gift to the couple, which can be an additional expense. You can suggest that your bridesmaids pool their funds to purchase a group gift or choose something affordable from the registry. If your bridesmaids are facing financial constraints, it's essential to communicate and find ways to reduce costs, such as opting for a low-key bachelorette party or choosing a less expensive dress. Remember, it's important to be mindful of everyone's budget and find a balance that works for your wedding party.

Venue

When it comes to choosing your wedding venue, there are a few things to consider. Firstly, the size and layout of the ceremony room will dictate how many people you can have in your bridal party. If you're getting married in a small space, you might not have room for a large number of bridesmaids. On the other hand, if you're getting married in a grand ballroom, a small bridal party might look out of place.

Another thing to consider is the formality of your wedding. Very formal weddings typically have more bridesmaids, with between 6 and 10 being common. Semi-formal to formal weddings usually have between 2 and 6 bridesmaids, while casual weddings and elopements often have just one or two, or sometimes none at all. Of course, these are just guidelines, and you should ultimately choose whatever feels right for you.

Don't forget to think about the cost implications of your venue, too. Each bridesmaid will incur additional costs, such as their dress, shoes, accessories, flowers, food, and transportation. So, if you're working with a tight budget, you may need to limit the number of bridesmaids accordingly.

Finally, consider the dynamics of your social group. If you have multiple close friends or family members who you'd like to include, you might want to ask them all to be bridesmaids. This way, you can avoid hurting anyone's feelings. However, if you feel that having a large bridal party will cause drama or stress, it's perfectly fine to keep it small and intimate.

Formality

The number of bridesmaids you choose to have at your wedding is entirely up to you and your budget. However, if you are planning a formal wedding, there are certain expectations you may want to meet.

The formality of your wedding will likely influence the number of bridesmaids you have. The more formal the wedding, the more attendants you are expected to have. For example, a black-tie wedding with over 200 guests may have up to 12 attendants or bridesmaids. Semi-formal to formal weddings usually have between two and six bridesmaids. On the other hand, casual weddings, elopements, and registry office weddings often have just one or two bridesmaids or none at all.

If you are planning a grand, formal wedding, a larger bridal party might be more appropriate. This means you can include all the important people in your life and have more hands on deck to help with wedding planning tasks. However, a larger bridal party can also mean more expenses, more opinions, and more challenges when it comes to coordination.

Ultimately, the decision is yours. Don't feel pressured to have a certain number of bridesmaids to match the formality of your wedding. Choose the people you want standing by your side, regardless of whether it's a small or large group.

Other Considerations

In addition to formality, there are a few other factors to consider when deciding on the number of bridesmaids:

• Budget: Each bridesmaid comes with additional costs, such as their dress, accessories, flowers, food, and gifts.
• Venue: The size and layout of your venue can impact the number of bridesmaids you choose. Consider how many people will comfortably fit in the space during the ceremony.
• Friendship dynamics: Think about the dynamics of your social group and whether leaving someone out might hurt their feelings.
• Photography: Many brides prefer to have an even number of bridesmaids for symmetry in photos, but this is not a requirement.

Remember, there is no right or wrong number of bridesmaids. The most important thing is to choose the people you want by your side as you celebrate one of the most important days of your life.

Friendship dynamics

Firstly, it's important to assess your social group and the dynamics within it. If you have a close-knit group of friends, you may want to include all of them as bridesmaids. This can ensure that no one feels left out and can create a sense of inclusivity. However, if you have a larger social circle or a mix of friends and family members you'd like to include, deciding on a number can be tricky. In this case, it's essential to set clear criteria for yourself on what factors are most important to you when choosing your bridesmaids.

For instance, you might want to prioritise those friends who have been by your side through thick and thin, or those who you know will be able to commit to the responsibilities of being a bridesmaid. It's also worth considering the practical aspects, such as your budget and the size of your venue. Each additional bridesmaid comes with extra costs, and a large number of bridesmaids may not fit well in a small venue.

Another aspect to think about is the potential for drama or conflict within your group of friends. Having a large number of bridesmaids with differing opinions and personalities can sometimes lead to added stress and complications. It's important to choose bridesmaids who you know will support you and work together harmoniously to make your wedding day special.

Ultimately, the decision on how many bridesmaids to have should be based on your unique friendships and what feels right for you. Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all approach, and you can always find creative ways to include friends who aren't part of the bridal party in other aspects of your wedding.

Logistics

When it comes to the logistics of having bridesmaids, there are a few things to consider. Firstly, the budget. Each bridesmaid will incur additional costs for their dress, shoes, accessories, flowers, food, gifts, and transportation. Hair and makeup are also often paid for by the bride. Therefore, it is important to consider your budget when deciding on the number of bridesmaids.

Secondly, the venue. The size and layout of the ceremony space may dictate the number of bridesmaids you can have. A small, intimate wedding in a registry office or country hotel may not accommodate a large number of bridesmaids, whereas a grand ballroom might look odd with only a few bridesmaids. Additionally, the wedding photos should be considered. Many brides prefer to have an even number of bridesmaids for symmetry in photos, although this is not a requirement.

Thirdly, the formality of the wedding. Very formal weddings typically have more bridesmaids, with black-tie affairs having between 6 and 10, or even up to 12. Semi-formal to formal weddings usually have between 2 and 6, while casual weddings often have just one or two, or sometimes none. However, these are just guidelines, and ultimately, the decision should be based on the bride's preferences and budget.

Another thing to consider is friendship dynamics. It can be tricky to choose between close friends and family members, and the bride may want to avoid hurting anyone's feelings. In this case, it might be best to either include everyone or have a smaller number of bridesmaids.

Lastly, it is important to remember that being a bridesmaid is a commitment, and the bride should choose people who are up for the task. More bridesmaids mean more opinions, schedules to coordinate, and expenses. Therefore, a smaller group may be easier to manage, especially if the venue is intimate.

Frequently asked questions