Writing a cheque as a wedding gift can be tricky, but there are ways to do it successfully. It's important to remember that a cheque can feel impersonal, so it's best to find a way to personalise the gesture. For example, you could put the cheque in a greeting card with a handwritten message inside. It's also a good idea to address the card to both the bride and groom, congratulating them and including a personal statement.
When writing the cheque, make it payable to just one person so that the couple doesn't have to wait to get a joint account before cashing it. Use the couple's pre-married names and always use the word or instead of and between their names. This will ensure that either person can deposit the cheque without the other present.
Characteristics | Values |
---|---|
Who to address the cheque to | Use the couple's pre-married names. Avoid addressing as "Mr. & Mrs. [Groom]" as this may cause issues if the couple doesn't have a joint account. |
Conjunction between names | Use "OR" instead of "AND" so that either person can deposit the cheque without the other present. |
Amount to give | $50-$200 depending on relationship to couple and budget. |
How to give | Put the cheque in a greeting card with a personal message. Consider gift-wrapping the cheque. Mail the cheque to a permanent address to avoid it getting lost. |
What You'll Learn
Use the couple's pre-married names
When writing a cheque as a wedding gift, it is important to use the couple's pre-married names. This is because, even if someone plans to change their name after the wedding, the name-changing process takes time, and the couple could hit a snag with the bank if your cheque is addressed to their not-yet-official new name. Using their pre-married names also allows either member of the couple to deposit the cheque without the other being present.
If you are writing a cheque to the couple, be sure to use "OR" between their names (e.g. "Kim Jones or Jackie Garcia"). This will ensure that either person can deposit it. If you use "AND", the bank may require them both to be present at the time of deposit or for the account used to be in both their names.
If you are writing the cheque to just one member of the couple, use their maiden name or the last name they had before the wedding. You can reference the couple in the memo portion of the cheque by writing "To the newlyweds".
It is also important to make sure you get the names right. Check the spelling, and also check the names themselves. Many wedding invitations and websites use first and middle names, which could be misleading if you are not familiar with both spouses. When in doubt, use the first and last names you know best for the cheque.
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Use or instead of and
When writing a cheque to newlyweds, it is important to use the conjunction "or" instead of "and" between their names. This will ensure that either member of the couple can cash the cheque into their account without requiring the presence of the other person or a joint account. For example, write "Kim Jones or Jackie Garcia" instead of "Kim Jones and Jackie Garcia".
Step 1: Date the cheque
Write the date in the top right-hand corner of the cheque. This is important so that the bank and the payee know when the cheque was written.
Step 2: Payee details
On the line labelled "Pay to the Order of", write the names of both members of the couple, using their pre-married names. You can also write "or" between their names to ensure that either person can cash the cheque. For example, write "Kim Jones or Jackie Garcia".
Step 3: Payment amount in numbers
Write the payment amount numerically in the small box on the right-hand side of the cheque. Ensure that the numbers are clear and legible.
Step 4: Payment amount in words
On the line below "Pay to the Order of", write out the payment amount in words. For example, if the payment amount is $1500, write "one thousand five hundred and 00/100" to indicate that the cheque is for $1500 only and there are no cents.
Step 5: Memo
Filling out the memo section is optional, but it can be helpful to include a note about the purpose of the cheque. For example, you could write "Wedding gift".
Step 6: Signature
Sign the cheque in the bottom right-hand corner. This indicates that you agree to pay the stated amount to the correct payee.
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Include a personal message
Including a personal message with a cheque for newlyweds is a great way to make the gift more meaningful. Here are some tips to help you craft a thoughtful and appropriate message:
- Address the card to both individuals: It is important to address the card to both the bride and the groom. Avoid addressing something personal only to the bride, as the card's contents should now be relevant to both newlyweds.
- Avoid generic messages: Try to include a personalised note beyond the pre-written message inside the card. If you're struggling for words, you can say something like, "I found this card, and these words were exactly how I felt."
- Be careful with humour: Sarcasm can be hard to interpret on paper. Avoid sensitive topics such as money or the length of the relationship, and steer clear of divorce jokes.
- Include a memory: The better you know them, the more personal the card can be. Include a memory that involves both individuals, such as a shared adventure or a funny story.
- Sign off with love: Meier, an etiquette expert, suggests using sign-offs such as "XOXO", "Elated for you", "Over the moon for you", or "Madly in love with you two".
- Congratulate the couple: It is always a nice touch to congratulate the couple and wish them a happy and healthy future together.
- Give an update if you've already sent a gift: If you've already sent a gift to the couple's home or contributed to a honeymoon fund, you can write something like, "We hope you enjoy the gift we sent to your home."
- Provide a specific amount: Instead of a generic amount, give the couple a specific amount that holds meaning for you and them. For example, you could give them enough money to have dinner at your favourite restaurant.
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Gift-wrap the cheque
If you want to gift-wrap a cheque for newlyweds, you can follow these steps:
Find a small box
Firstly, source a small box. This will ensure your gift has some weight and is less likely to be lost or thrown away accidentally.
Write a thoughtful card
Write a card to the newlyweds, congratulating them and sharing a personal message. You could include a shared memory, some words of advice, or your best wishes for their future together. This will make your gift feel more meaningful and thoughtful.
Put the cheque and card in the box
Place the cheque inside the box, along with your card. If you'd like, you can also include some decorative elements, such as ribbons or confetti.
Wrap the box
Choose some nice wrapping paper and wrap the box. You can add a ribbon or a bow to make it look extra special.
Consider including a gift
If you'd like to give the newlyweds a little something extra, you could include a small gift inside the box, such as a vintage bottle of wine or a book you think they'd enjoy.
Deliver the gift
Finally, decide how you will deliver the gift. You can either give it to the couple in person at the wedding or send it to them via mail. If you're mailing the gift, make sure to use a permanent marker to write their address and use a tracking number to ensure it arrives safely.
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Mail the cheque
Mailing a cheque to newlyweds is a great way to ensure that your gift doesn't get misplaced at the wedding. It's also a good option if you're travelling to the wedding, as it's more convenient and practical than bringing a large, bulky gift. Here are some tips for mailing a cheque to newlyweds:
Timing
It's appropriate to mail a cheque any time before the wedding or shortly after the wedding. Don't wait more than three months post-wedding to mail the cheque. Most people date their cheques for the day they write them, so if they write the cheque on or before the wedding day, the couple can deposit it within a few weeks after their wedding. This is important if the couple plans to use the funds for their honeymoon. Waiting too long to cash the cheque might also cause the person's account not to have enough funds when the cheque is cashed.
Addressing the Cheque
Use the couple's pre-married names on the cheque. Changing names after marriage takes time, and the couple might want to use the cheque for honeymoon expenses. Using their pre-married names will make it more convenient for them to deposit the cheque. If the couple has the same surname, you can address them as "Mr. and Mrs. [John Smith]". If they have different surnames, use "or" between their names instead of "and". This will ensure that either person can deposit the cheque individually. For example, write "Stella Whitbey or Alex Umar".
If you're unsure about the couple's names, it's better to ask someone close to them. Not all brides will take their spouse's last name, and you don't want to assume the order of hyphenated last names. If the names are too complicated, consider making the cheque out to someone the couple trusts, like a wedding planner.
Mailing the Cheque
Address the cheque to a permanent address where you know one or both members of the couple will receive it. Put the cheque in a greeting card with a personal message. This will make your gift more meaningful than simply sticking a cheque in an envelope. You can also gift-wrap the cheque and put it in a small box. Include a note card with a personal message.
Remember to include your name and address on the envelope and card. You can also track the delivery status of the cheque using the tracking number provided by the post office. This will ensure that your gift arrives safely and promptly.
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Frequently asked questions
It is best to use the couple's pre-married names, as name changes can take time. Use "or" instead of "and" between their names so that either person can deposit the check.
The general rule is not to give a check for less than $50. However, your personal finances, cultural norms, and closeness to the couple will also affect the amount.
Cash is easier for the couple as they won't need to visit the bank. However, some guests prefer giving a check for security reasons, as it's unlikely to be stolen.