Planning A Wedding With A Family Member: Close Or Too Close?

Planning a wedding can be stressful, especially if you're trying to juggle the needs and expectations of your family members. It's important to find ways to include your family in the planning process, even if you're physically apart or dealing with difficult dynamics. Whether it's asking your parents to join you on virtual venue tours, finding a quiet moment with a special family member on the day, or enlisting the support of your partner to manage controlling parents, there are strategies to ensure your loved ones feel involved and valued.

Involving family members in the wedding planning process

Planning a wedding can be stressful, and it can be difficult to know how to involve family members in the process. Here are some tips for involving family members in the wedding planning process:

Firstly, it's important to recognise that not everyone will have the time, resources or desire to be deeply involved in the wedding planning process. Allow family members to choose their level of participation and be understanding if someone prefers a less active role.

Open, honest communication is key to involving family members in the wedding planning process. Start by openly discussing your vision and expectations with your families. Be receptive to their input, ideas and concerns, while still being ready to draw boundaries where necessary. Maintain regular communication channels, such as group chats and emails, to keep everyone informed and engaged.

Organise family meetings and brainstorming sessions to discuss wedding plans, address concerns and generate new ideas in person. These gatherings provide an opportunity for families to bond, share their excitement and contribute collectively to the wedding.

Involve family members in the planning process by asking for their input on certain aspects of the wedding, such as the menu, music or family traditions that could be incorporated into the day. This could be as simple as asking them to help choose the stamps for your invitations or as large as asking a family member to be part of the wedding party.

Remember, a wedding is not only a marriage of two individuals, but also a union of two families. Plan collaborative events that allow your two families to bond and get to know each other better. This could be a family-only event or simply asking your parents to join you on a virtual tour of venues. It's also a good idea for your family members to get to know the wedding vendors who will be on site on your wedding day.

Finally, don't forget that family members can offer emotional support during this significant and sometimes stressful life event. Let them provide a listening ear, offer guidance and share in your excitement and challenges.

Dealing with difficult family members

Planning a wedding can be stressful enough without the added pressure of dealing with difficult family members. Here are some tips to help you navigate this challenging situation:

• Teamwork: Working as a team with your partner can make you feel braver and more resilient in the face of controlling family members. Communicate openly with your partner about what's wrong and get their support.
• Defuse the situation: If you anticipate that a difficult family member might cause a problem at your wedding, try to defuse the situation before it happens. This could involve setting boundaries and having open and empowering communication to protect your well-being and headspace.
• Lean on your support system: Don't be afraid to lean on your friends or other supportive family members. Ask them to help communicate with the challenging family members if it's causing you too much stress.
• Involve them in a different way: If you're not comfortable with directly confronting the difficult family member, try involving them in a different aspect of the wedding. For example, if you don't want a huge wedding party, you can include them in other ways, such as asking their opinion on venues or introducing them to your wedding vendors.
• Hire a wedding planner: If you're dealing with controlling parents, consider hiring a wedding planner. This person can help you wrestle back control and act as a buffer between you and the difficult family member.

Remember, setting boundaries with difficult family members doesn't mean you don't care or love them. It's about protecting your well-being and ensuring your wedding day is as stress-free as possible.

Including family in the wedding ceremony

Planning a wedding can be stressful, especially if you have difficult family members. If you're finding it hard to deal with controlling parents, you could hire a wedding planner to wrestle back some control. Working as a team with your partner will also make you feel braver and more capable in the face of overbearing family members.

If you're not able to see your family members in person, there are still ways to include them in the wedding planning process. You could ask your parents to join you on a virtual tour of a wedding venue, for example, or introduce them to the wedding vendors who will be on site on your wedding day.

On the day itself, it can be nice to plan a few minutes of private time with a special family member to help you get ready. This could be someone helping you with the finishing touches on your wedding dress, or straightening your bow tie.

If you're trying to let a family member down gently when it comes to being a bridesmaid, it's important to pick a way that takes their feelings into account. There are other ways to include them in your special day, such as asking them to do a reading during the ceremony.

Choosing bridesmaids

If you don't want a large wedding party, you could consider asking your bridesmaids to perform multiple roles. For example, one of your bridesmaids could also be your makeup artist or hair stylist. This can be a good way to include more people in your bridal party without increasing the size of your wedding party.

It's also important to remember that your bridesmaids are there to support you. If you're feeling overwhelmed or stressed during the wedding planning process, don't be afraid to lean on them for support. They may be able to help you with tasks such as addressing invitations or picking up your dress.

Finally, don't forget to have fun with your bridesmaids! The wedding planning process can be stressful, but it's also a chance to create memories with your closest friends. Plan a fun day or evening where you can all get together and relax. This could be a spa day, a wine tasting, or even just a movie night.

Including family in the wedding planning process virtually

Planning a wedding can be stressful, especially if you're trying to include family members who can't be there in person. However, there are ways to include your family in the wedding planning process, even if you're physically apart.

One way to do this is to take a virtual tour of wedding venues with your family. Sites like WeddingWire offer virtual tours of certain wedding venues, so your family can take a look at the space and provide input. It's also a good idea for your family members to get to know the wedding vendors who will be on-site on your wedding day, including your wedding planner, photographer, videographer, caterer, music pros, and venue coordinator.

If you're not able to see your family in person, you can still include them in the planning process by asking for their input on decisions and keeping them updated on your progress. You might find that your parents or other loved ones want to talk about your wedding more than ever, as it's a positive and exciting event to look forward to.

If you're dealing with difficult family members who want to take control of the planning process, it's important to work as a team with your partner and communicate openly about what's wrong. You can also consider hiring a wedding planner to help you manage the process and keep things running smoothly.

Finally, don't forget that your family members can still be involved in your wedding day, even if they're not in the wedding party. You can plan a few minutes on your wedding timeline for some private time with a special family member, whether they're helping you get ready or just spending some quiet time together.

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