Rhiannon Hendricks
Wedding gifts are a common tradition, with many people giving gifts to the happy couple as a token of their love and support. But what about giving gifts to family members? There is no clear consensus on whether it is necessary to give gifts to family members at a wedding. Some people choose to give their parents or in-laws small presents or sentimental keepsakes, especially if they have contributed financially or logistically to the wedding. Others opt for a simple card or flowers as an expression of gratitude. Ultimately, the decision to give gifts to family members at a wedding is a personal one, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Gift-giving to family members at a wedding | Not mandatory but appreciated |
| Gift-giving to parents at a wedding | Not common but appreciated; a card or small gift is often given |
| Gift-giving budget | $25 for co-workers, $50-$100 for close friends and family, $150+ for best friends and close family |
| Group gifts | Common and appreciated |
| Gift type | Sentimental, practical, or experience-based gifts are common |
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What You'll Learn
Gifts for family members in the wedding party
While there is no concrete wedding gift-giving etiquette, it is still customary to give gifts to family members in the wedding party. These gifts are a way to express gratitude and appreciation for their support and presence on your special day. Here are some thoughtful and personalized gift ideas for family members in the wedding party:
For Parents
If your parents have contributed financially or logistically to the wedding, it is a thoughtful gesture to give them a sentimental gift. A popular idea is to present them with a gift during a speech, expressing your gratitude for their support. This could be in the form of a small keepsake, such as a custom illustration or a photo album with images from the wedding. Alternatively, you can opt for practical gifts like a personalized glass whiskey decanter with their initials or your family monogram.
For Siblings
For siblings who are part of the wedding party, such as a maid of honour, best man, or bridesmaids and groomsmen, it is customary to give them a thank-you gift. These gifts can be personalized and unique to their roles, such as custom jewellery or cufflinks. You can also opt for practical gifts like travel jewellery cases or customized drink tumblers. If you want to splurge, consider luxe barware or a brass and wood display box filled with printed memories.
For Young Helpers
Young helpers in the wedding party, such as flower girls and ring bearers, deserve small and cute gifts too. Consider giving them sticker books, stuffed animals, or costumes to keep them entertained. You can also give them similar items to the adult wedding party members, like a necklace and getting-ready robe for the flower girl or fun dress socks and a watch for the ring bearer.
For Other Family Members
For other family members in the wedding party, such as grandparents, aunts, or uncles, you can consider gifts that symbolize family bonds. For instance, handmade recycled glass globes featuring an intricate design of a tree trunk with vibrant colours can represent the unique roles each family member plays in your journey. Alternatively, you can give them a ring dish, a versatile gift that can hold jewellery or everyday essentials like keys or lip balm.
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Gifts for parents
There is no clear consensus on whether it is necessary to give gifts to family members at weddings. Some people give small gifts to their parents at the rehearsal dinner, while others believe that the gift is having the wedding and inviting them and their friends. Some couples give gifts to their parents only if they have contributed financially to the wedding.
If you do decide to give your parents a gift, it is a good idea to choose something meaningful and heartfelt that shows your appreciation for their love and support. Here are some gift ideas that are sure to make your parents feel special:
- Customised tree print: This print features a sweet saying: "There are two lasting bequests we can give our children. One is roots. The other is wings. Thank you for giving us both."
- Customised handkerchiefs: You can get these embroidered with a personal message to your parents.
- Customised keepsakes: These can include a ring dish with a heartfelt message, a custom tie clip, or a personalised wooden family wall sign.
- Photo gifts: Create a customised photo album or a framed print featuring parent-child dance song lyrics and treasured family photos.
- Food and drink: Treat your parents to a selection of delicious handmade toffees or a personalised leather wine box set.
- Practical gifts: A forever charcuterie set or a picnic wine table are perfect for parents who love to entertain or spend time outdoors.
- Subscription gifts: Sign your parents up for a monthly coffee delivery or another subscription service that aligns with their interests.
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Joint gifts from families
It is not customary to give gifts to your family for your wedding, but it is a nice gesture to acknowledge their support and contribution to your wedding. If you are looking to give a joint gift from families, it is best to keep it small and sentimental, especially if the families have not been involved in the wedding planning or contributed financially.
A joint gift from families is often given when multiple children from the same family are getting married. In this case, it is thoughtful to give a gift that can be enjoyed by both couples, such as a shared experience or something for the home that they can use together. For example, a gift card to a nice restaurant or a contribution towards a piece of furniture they can choose together.
If the families are contributing financially or offering significant logistical or emotional support, a more substantial gift may be appropriate. This could be individual gifts for each family member or a larger joint gift, such as a holiday or an experience that the whole family can enjoy together.
The cost of the gift should be based on the relationship with the couple and the means of the givers. It is not necessary to give an expensive gift, especially if it is a burden, but a thoughtful, sentimental gift will always be appreciated.
Some ideas for joint gifts from families include:
- A personalised, handmade, or vintage item with sentimental value.
- A contribution towards a larger item, such as furniture or an appliance.
- An experience or holiday for the couple to enjoy together.
- A gift card to a store or restaurant that they can choose to use at their convenience.
- Flowers or a nice card expressing gratitude and appreciation.
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Gift amount and budget
The amount you spend on a wedding gift depends on a variety of factors, such as your budget, your relationship with the couple, and the cost of attending the wedding. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to wedding gift amounts, and it is essential to consider your own financial situation when deciding how much to spend.
According to experts, the average person spends around $150 on a wedding gift. However, this amount can vary depending on your relationship with the couple. For close friends, family members, or if you are part of the wedding party, it is recommended to spend $150 or more. For coworkers or distant relatives, a gift in the range of $50 to $100 is considered appropriate. If you are attending with a plus-one, it is suggested to give a gift in the range of $100 to $200.
If you are on a tight budget, it is perfectly acceptable to give a smaller gift or to purchase a gift from the registry instead of giving cash. You can also consider giving a gift card to one of the stores where the couple has registered if everything on the registry is over your budget. Additionally, if you are attending multiple pre-wedding events, such as the engagement party and bridal shower, you can use the 60-20-20 rule, allocating 20% of your total budget to the engagement party gift, 20% to the bridal shower gift, and 60% to the actual wedding gift.
It is worth noting that your time, energy, and contributions to the wedding can also be considered when determining the gift amount. For example, if you have helped plan the bridal shower, organized the bachelor or bachelorette party, or contributed in other ways, this can be factored into your overall gift.
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Group gifts
It is a known tradition for the couple to give gifts to their wedding party as a token of appreciation for their time, support, and presence on their special day. This often includes parents, siblings, and members of the bridal party, such as maids of honor, best men, bridesmaids, and groomsmen. While it is not mandatory, it is certainly a thoughtful gesture that can make your loved ones feel valued and appreciated. Group gifts can be an excellent solution, especially when you have a large family or a limited budget. Here are some ideas and considerations for group gifts:
For your parents or future in-laws, a heartfelt and meaningful gift can be a great option. Consider something personalized, such as a custom photo album or frame with a picture from your wedding day. You could also contribute to a larger, more expensive item they might appreciate, like a piece of furniture or a vacation fund. Another idea is to offer an experience, such as a spa day or a nice dinner, to create memorable moments together.
If you have siblings or close cousins, you might want to consider a group gift that includes them. This could be something fun and lighthearted, like a game night kit or a subscription box tailored to their interests. Alternatively, you could go for a more practical option, such as a gift card or a shopping spree, allowing them to choose something they truly want or need.
For your bridal party, consider gifts that show your appreciation for their support throughout the wedding planning process and on your big day. Jewelry is a popular choice, as it can be personalized and worn during the wedding and on future occasions. You could also opt for a pampering experience, like a day at the salon or a set of luxury bath products. Another idea is to gift them something that represents your friendship, like a personalized piece of artwork or a fun inside joke item.
When it comes to budgeting for group gifts, it is essential to be mindful of your overall wedding expenses. You can allocate a specific amount for each group, such as parents, siblings, and bridal party, and then divide that amount among the individuals within each group. It's also a good idea to start planning and saving for these gifts in advance to reduce financial strain.
In conclusion, while it is not mandatory to give gifts to your family for your wedding, it is a thoughtful way to show your gratitude and appreciation. Group gifts can be a wonderful option, especially when personalized and meaningful. Consider the interests and relationships you share with your family members, and choose gifts that align with those connections. Remember to plan and budget accordingly, and your family will surely feel valued and loved on your special day.
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Frequently asked questions
It is not necessary to give gifts to your parents for your wedding, especially if they have contributed financially to the wedding. However, it is a nice gesture to give them a small token of appreciation, such as flowers or a heartfelt card.
It is customary to give gifts to your wedding party as a token of thanks for their time and money. These gifts can be the same for everyone, such as personalised travel jewellery cases for the bridesmaids and customised drink tumblers for the groomsmen.
The amount spent on a gift depends on your budget and your relationship to the couple. Close friends and family members typically spend more, around $50 to $150, whereas coworkers or distant relatives may spend $25 to $100. It is also common to give joint gifts.
Many couples create a wedding registry, which can be found on their wedding website or invitation. Guests can choose to stick to this registry or give experiential gifts, such as a restaurant gift card. It is also a nice touch to give your spouse-to-be a gift to celebrate your union.
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