The Boutonniere's Place: Wedding Etiquette Explored

do you move the boutonniere at a wedding

Boutonnières are small flower arrangements that are typically affixed to the wearer's clothing. They are usually worn by men at weddings and are pinned to the left lapel of a suit jacket. While they are a great way to identify all the men in the wedding party and elevate their looks, they can also be a bit tricky as they may need to be moved or adjusted throughout the day, especially during hugs or dances.

Characteristics Values
What is a boutonniere? A small flower arrangement worn in the buttonhole of a man's suit
When is it worn? On special occasions, most importantly on one's wedding day
Who wears it? The groom, groomsmen, fathers, grandfathers, page boys, and other male wedding attendees
Can women wear boutonnieres? Yes, women can wear boutonnieres, which are called corsages. These can be pinned or magnetic and are usually worn on the wrist
How is it worn? On the left lapel of a suit jacket, pointing towards the left shoulder
Can it be moved? Yes, it can be moved and adjusted by a dresser or wedding planner
Are there alternatives? Yes, there are fabric, feather, button, and charm boutonnieres that can be used instead of flowers

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Boutonnière vs pocket square

When it comes to wedding attire, it's important to pay attention to the small details for the groom and groomsmen. One such detail is the choice between a boutonnière and a pocket square. Both have their own advantages and considerations, and the decision ultimately depends on personal preference and the overall desired look.

A boutonnière is a small flower arrangement typically affixed to the left lapel of a suit jacket. It adds formality and charm to the groom's attire and is considered more traditional for weddings. However, one thing to consider is the height of the significant other. If they are not tall enough, the boutonnière may be at their face level, which can be tricky for photos and may require adjustment.

On the other hand, a pocket square is a classic accessory in men's fashion. It can be used to add a pop of colour or pattern to the groom's outfit, showcasing personality and interest. Pocket squares are typically considered less formal than boutonnières, but they offer more flexibility in terms of styling. Unlike boutonnières, pocket squares do not require any adjustment during the wedding, making them a low-maintenance option.

Some people choose to wear both a boutonnière and a pocket square, especially if the pocket square is solid-coloured or has a non-busy pattern. However, combining both can make the left side of the suit look too busy, so it's important to strike a balance and ensure they complement each other.

Ultimately, the decision between a boutonnière and a pocket square depends on the groom's preference and the desired aesthetic for the wedding. It's worth noting that boutonnières are traditionally associated with weddings, while pocket squares are more versatile and can be worn on various formal occasions.

In terms of who should receive these floral arrangements, it is customary for the groomsmen, fathers, grandfathers, and brothers of the bride and groom to wear boutonnières. Additionally, ushers who play an important role in directing guests and answering questions may also be given boutonnières for identification. Corsages, the female equivalent of boutonnières, are typically worn by mothers, grandmothers, and stepmothers of the bride and groom.

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Who should wear one?

Boutonnieres are traditionally worn by men and are a great way to identify all the men in the wedding party and elevate their look. The groom, groomsmen, fathers, grandfathers, brothers, and page boys often wear boutonnieres. They are usually worn on the left lapel of a suit jacket or tuxedo, pointing towards the left shoulder.

Boutonnieres are a small floral arrangement and are generally saved for special occasions in a man's life, with the most important one being his wedding day. They can be used to match the bridal flowers and those of the wedding party, creating a cohesive look.

However, boutonnieres can also be worn by women. When worn by women, they are usually called corsages. Mothers, grandmothers, the bride, and other female family members or honorary guests may choose to wear a boutonniere or corsage.

Ultimately, it is up to the couple to decide who wears a boutonniere or corsage. Some couples choose to give them to anyone walking down the aisle as part of the procession, while others may only give them to the wedding party and their parents.

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How to attach it

A boutonniere is a small flower arrangement that is typically affixed to the wearer's clothing. It is derived from the French word "boutonnière", meaning "buttonhole", as it is traditionally inserted into the buttonhole of a suit jacket's left lapel.

  • Ensure you have washed your hands to avoid leaving smudgy fingerprints on your outfit.
  • Position the boutonniere so that the flower's stem and head are upright and pointing towards the left shoulder.
  • From beneath the lapel, push the pin through the fabric and through the top of the stem either diagonally or straight down.
  • Take the second pin and angle it through the suit jacket behind the lapel in the opposite direction. The placement of the pins should form an X shape on the back of the lapel.
  • Make sure that the pins are not visible from the front and that they are grabbing only a small part of the suit fabric. If the pins are showing or feel loose, try re-pinning them higher up on the boutonniere stem, closer to the flower head where there is more weight.
  • If you are wearing a magnetic boutonniere, simply flip over the lapel and clip the magnetic back in place.

It is recommended to ask your florist to assist in attaching the boutonniere, as they will have the most experience with handling these delicate floral arrangements. Additionally, make sure the best man carries extra pins, as they will come in handy throughout the day.

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Cost considerations

The cost of boutonnieres and other wedding flowers can vary significantly depending on a range of factors. The average cost of flowers for weddings in the US is $1500, but this can range from $800 to $25,000. The groom's family traditionally covers the cost of the bride's bouquet, boutonnieres, and corsages for members of the wedding party and family, but nowadays, many couples cover the costs themselves.

The type of flowers used will have a large impact on the overall cost. Splurge options include orchids, peonies, and hydrangeas, with orchids costing up to $98 per stem and hydrangeas up to $20 per stem. Roses, tulips, and daisies are more affordable options, with tulips available at an average of $3.00 per stem. The availability of certain flowers will also affect the cost, with seasonal flowers and those that do not bloom often being more expensive.

The location of the wedding and the season will also influence the price of flowers. It is recommended to use local flowers that are in season to keep costs down. The quantity of flowers needed will also vary depending on the size of the wedding and the number of locations. A large, grand wedding will require a higher volume of flowers, increasing the overall cost.

To save money, some couples opt for silk or fake flowers instead of fresh flowers. DIYing florals can also be more financially feasible, but it may come with the trade-off of a less professional look and potential issues with execution. Adding greenery to arrangements is another way to keep costs down while still incorporating flowers.

Early budgeting, clear communication, and creativity are key to successfully incorporating flowers into your wedding within your budget. It is important to consider not only the cost of the flowers but also the expenses for transport, storage, and the florist's design and setup fees. Sales tax and other additional costs should also be factored in.

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Allergies

A wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime event, and you would want everything to be perfect, from the decor to the guests' comfort. If you are planning to include boutonnieres, it is essential to be mindful of your guests' allergies.

When it comes to allergies, it is crucial to be considerate of your guests' well-being. Boutonnieres are typically made of flowers, and certain types of flowers can trigger allergic reactions such as headaches and runny noses. To ensure that your guests can fully enjoy your special day, it is recommended to take the following steps:

  • Inquire about allergies: Before finalising your guest list and ordering the boutonnieres, consider asking your guests if they have any specific flower allergies. This simple step can help you avoid potential allergic reactions and ensure your guests' comfort.
  • Choose low-pollen flowers: Opt for flowers with low to no pollen content. For example, double-flowered baby's breath has lower pollen content than the single-flowered variety. Other options include begonias, sunflowers, daffodils, crocus, periwinkle, tulips, and roses.
  • Provide alternatives: If you are concerned about allergies, consider offering alternative boutonnieres made from non-floral materials. Paper, silk, felt, and other elegant fabrics can be used to create beautiful DIY or handmade boutonnieres. These alternatives are not only allergy-friendly but also durable and can be purchased or crafted ahead of time.
  • Customise for individuals: If you know that a particular guest has a severe flower allergy, you can personalise their boutonniere using non-floral materials such as metal pins, paper pinwheels, or even a neckerchief that matches your wedding colour scheme.
  • Communicate with your florist: Your wedding florist is likely to be knowledgeable about flowers that commonly cause allergic reactions. Consult with them about low-pollen or hybrid flower options that can be used in your boutonnieres.

By being mindful of allergies and providing alternative options, you can ensure that all your guests feel included and comfortable during your wedding celebrations. Remember, it is not just about the aesthetics of the boutonnieres but also about the well-being and enjoyment of your guests.

Frequently asked questions

A boutonniere is a small flower arrangement that is worn in the buttonhole of a man’s suit. It is derived from the French word "boutonnière", meaning "buttonhole".

Boutonnieres are traditionally worn by men in the wedding party, such as the groom, groomsmen, fathers, grandfathers, and page boys. However, any wedding party member who wishes to wear one may do so.

You may need to adjust or move the boutonniere throughout the wedding, especially after hugs or dance moves. It is a good idea to have extra pins on hand for this purpose.

To attach a boutonniere, use two pins to stabilise and secure it. Angle the pins through the suit jacket behind the lapel in opposite directions to create an X shape. Ensure the pins are not visible from the front and grab only a small part of the fabric.

Yes, you can make your own boutonniere. Boutonnieres can be made from fabric, feathers, buttons, and charms, or fresh or artificial flowers. You can also purchase ready-made boutonnieres that match your wedding colour scheme.

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