Evening Wedding Invitation Etiquette: To Include Or Not?

Wedding invitation wording can be a minefield, and it's easy to get lost in the details. One of the most important things to consider is the time of your wedding—will it be in the morning, afternoon, or evening? This will impact the wording of your invitation, and it's important to get it right so that your guests know when and where to show up!

If your wedding is taking place in the evening, it's a good idea to specify this on the invitation. While you don't need to include in the evening if your wedding is taking place at 8, 9, or 10 o'clock, it can be helpful to specify the time of day for clarity. This is especially important if you have guests travelling from far who will need to arrange accommodation and travel plans.

There are a few ways to word this depending on the formality of your wedding. For a more traditional or formal wedding, you might write out the time in full, for example, at half after six o'clock in the evening. For a more casual wedding, you could use numerals and write 6:30 pm. Remember to be consistent with the formatting and match the style of your invitation.

When to send evening invites: 4-8 months ahead or 6-8 weeks after 'all-day' invites

Evening wedding invitations are sent to guests who will be joining you for your evening party only. You don't need to send them to your 'all-day' guests, who will already be at your wedding.

There are no hard and fast rules about when to send evening wedding invitations, but it's important to give your evening guests enough notice.

If you send your 'all-day' invitations between four to eight months ahead of the wedding, it's a good idea to send your evening invitations at the same time. This will give you enough time to receive replies and confirm final numbers for your venue and caterers.

However, if you send your 'all-day' invitations eight months before the wedding, you could send your evening invitations later—around six to eight weeks after. This gives you the opportunity to ''upgrade' guests who were initially only invited in the evening to join you for the full day if you have the space and budget. It also means you can be flexible with your guest list, as friendships and relationships may change.

Evening guests may not need as much notice as they probably won't need to book time off work or accommodation. However, it's important to give them enough time to plan, especially if they do need to make travel arrangements.

So, when should you send evening wedding invitations?

• Send them at the same time as your 'all-day' invitations if you're sending those four to eight months in advance.
• Send them six to eight weeks after your 'all-day' invitations if you send those eight months before the wedding.
• Ensure you send evening invitations no later than eight to twelve weeks before the wedding.

Who gets an evening invite: Only guests joining for the evening party

Evening reception invites are for those guests who are only joining the party for the evening. This might be due to budget or space constraints, or simply because you want to keep the day-time celebrations more intimate.

If you're worried about offending people by only inviting them to the evening do, there are some steps you can take to ensure your evening guests feel welcomed and included.

Firstly, be clear with your invitations. Always print a separate invitation card for the evening reception, and head your cards with 'evening reception' or 'evening celebration' rather than 'wedding invitation'.

It's also a good idea to instruct your invitees of any dress code that may be applicable, and to let them know whether or not they can bring a date.

Inform your evening guests of a definite starting time, and ensure you have finished your dinner and are ready to welcome them. It's also a nice touch to supply plenty of bubbly when they arrive, and to lay on a buffet dinner.

To make your evening guests feel extra special, you could save a wedding ritual such as the first dance or cake cutting for the evening, or throw the bouquet during the evening celebrations.

It is entirely up to you which guests you invite to the whole wedding day, and which are invited just to the evening reception. Your friends will be happy just to be included in your celebrations and will understand your budget restraints. Anyone that complains about not being invited to the whole day doesn't really deserve to be there at all.

How many invites: One per couple/household, not per guest

When it comes to sending out wedding invitations, it's important to consider how many invites you should send per household or couple. While it may be tempting to send just one invitation to keep costs down, it's worth noting that etiquette dictates that you should send one invitation per social unit, even if they live in the same house. This means that if you have a household with two parents and their adult children, each person would typically receive their own invitation.

However, some people choose to send just one invitation per household, especially if they are trying to cut costs. This approach can work, but it's important to be clear about who is invited. If you're inviting a family with adult children, for example, you may want to put "The Smith Family" on the invitation to indicate that everyone is invited. You can also add a line on the RSVP card that says "respectfully, only named guests are invited".

If there are significant others or adult children with their own partners, it's a good idea to send them separate invitations. This ensures that everyone feels included and knows that they are invited. You can address these invitations to each individual or couple, and include their names on the inner envelope.

Ultimately, the decision of how many invitations to send per household or couple is up to you. If you're trying to stick to a tight budget, sending one invitation per couple or household can be a viable option. Just be sure to clearly indicate who is invited and consider adding a line on the RSVP card to avoid any confusion.

RSVP: Yes, with a simple line at the bottom of the card

The RSVP section of a wedding invitation is a crucial part of the invitation suite, providing essential information for the couple and their vendors. Here are some tips and examples for creating an effective RSVP card with a simple line at the bottom:

Setting a Clear Deadline

It is recommended to set an RSVP deadline of around one to four weeks before the wedding date. This allows enough time for the couple and vendors to finalise details such as food quantities and seating arrangements. The deadline should be prominently displayed on the card, with wording such as "Kindly respond by [date]" or "Please reply by [date]."

Wording for Formal Weddings

For formal or traditional weddings, the RSVP card wording should be more formal and elegant. Here is an example:

"Your reply is kindly requested before [date]

Name(s) :__________________

☐ joyfully accept(s)

☐ regretfully decline(s)

☐ number attending"

Wording for Informal Weddings

If the wedding is more relaxed and informal, the RSVP card can reflect this with simpler and more playful language. Here is an example:

"Kindly reply before [date]

Name(s): _________________

☐ Can't wait!

☐ Sorry, I wish I/we could be there!"

Including Essential Information

The RSVP card should include a clear deadline, a way for guests to indicate their attendance, space for guests to write their names, and any dietary requirements or restrictions. It is also a good idea to include the couple's contact information and a reminder of the wedding website URL.

Adding a Creative Touch

The RSVP card is an opportunity to inject personality and creativity into the invitation suite. Consider adding fun questions or requests, such as song requests or advice for the newlyweds. This makes the card more engaging for guests and sets the tone for the wedding.

Matching Stationery

For a cohesive and elegant presentation, ensure that the RSVP card matches the style and design of the wedding invitation. Pre-addressed and pre-stamped envelopes are also convenient for guests and contribute to a polished look.

In summary, the RSVP card for a wedding invitation should be clear, concise, and informative, with a simple line at the bottom for guests to indicate their response. It should also reflect the style and tone of the wedding while providing essential information for the couple and their vendors.

Information: Date, time, venue, and RSVP details are sufficient

When it comes to wedding invitations, the goal is to provide your guests with enough information so that they know when and where your big day will take place—and they can show up on time! While there are no hard and fast rules, here are some instructive guidelines and tips to help you craft the perfect wedding invitation:

Host Names and Invitation Sentence:

Start by including the host names—who is the wedding invitation from? This is usually the parents of the bride, as tradition dictates that they host and foot the bill. However, if both sets of parents are contributing, you can opt for something like, "Together with their parents" or "Together with their families." If the couple is hosting, you can skip the host line or begin with a warm and welcoming sentence, such as "Together with full hearts".

Couple's Names:

The next essential detail is the couple's names—who is getting married? For different-sex couples, the bride's name typically goes first. If the bride's parents' names are listed at the top, only her first and middle name are mentioned, without the last name. For same-sex couples, there are no set rules, and you can list the names in alphabetical order or based on personal preference.

Date and Time:

The date and time of the wedding are crucial. While the traditional way to write the date is to spell it out completely, it's also acceptable to use numerals for a more casual feel. Be sure to capitalise the day of the week and include a comma between the day and the date. When indicating the time, you can write it out fully or use numerals for a more informal approach. Remember that you don't need to specify "in the morning," "in the afternoon," or "in the evening" unless there's a risk of confusion.

Location and Reception Details:

Provide the location of the ceremony and, if different, the reception venue. If the reception follows immediately in the same location, a simple "Reception to follow" or "Dinner and dancing to follow" will suffice. For separate locations, include the reception details on a separate insert card.

RSVP Details:

Always include a separate RSVP card or instructions for a digital RSVP. Specify the deadline for responses, usually three to four weeks before the wedding, to give you enough time to finalise catering and seating arrangements.

Additional Information:

For smaller details like travel, accommodation, attire suggestions, parking, or dietary requirements, consider including a separate card or directing guests to your wedding website for more information.

Proofreading and Clarity:

Proofread your wedding invitations thoroughly, and get a fresh pair of eyes to review them. Ensure there's clarity in all the details, especially timing, directions, and instructions.

In summary, while there are traditional and modern variations in wedding invitation wording, the key details to include are the host names, couple's names, date, time, venue, and RSVP information. By providing these essential details, you'll set the tone for your celebration and ensure your guests have the necessary information to join you on your special day.

Frequently asked questions