
Wedding planning can be a stressful task, especially when it comes to the tricky issue of including a deceased parent in the wedding program. While some people prefer not to include any memorials or mentions of deceased loved ones, others choose to honour them in various ways. From including a simple In Loving Memory section to listing the deceased parent under the wedding party, there are several ways to tastefully acknowledge their absence on this special day. Ultimately, the decision comes down to personal preference and what feels right for the couple.
| Characteristics | Values |
|---|---|
| Whether to include deceased parents in the wedding program | Depends on the couple's preference; some may want to avoid a reminder of their loss on their wedding day, while others may want to honour their deceased parents |
| How to include deceased parents | Options include: listing them under "In Loving Memory", "In Memoriam", or "In Memory"; mentioning them in a dedication; or including a memorial table with their photo and candles |
| Wording | Examples include: "We'd like to remember those close to us who are no longer with us but looking down on this special day"; "We know you'd be here today if heaven wasn't so far away"; "[Name], may her memory be a blessing" |
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What You'll Learn

'In Loving Memory' section
When a parent passes away, it can be tricky to decide how to include them in your wedding program. Here are some ideas and suggestions for an "In Loving Memory" section to honour them:
In Loving Memory Wording Ideas
- "We'd like to remember those close to us who are no longer with us but looking down on this special day. [Names of deceased loved ones]."
- "We are thinking of our loved ones who could not be here with us today, especially [names of deceased loved ones]."
- "In loving memory of [names of deceased parents], who we know would be here today if heaven wasn't so far away."
- "In loving memory of [names of deceased parents], who are here with us in spirit."
- "On this special day, we lovingly remember [names of deceased parents]."
Placement in the Program
Most people choose to place mentions of deceased loved ones at the end of the program to separate the melancholy portion from the celebratory sections. You can also include a dedication, such as lighting a candle or placing flowers in their memory.
Format and Headings
You can choose to format the "In Loving Memory" section as a paragraph or a list. If you opt for a list, you may want to divide it into two columns: one for names and another explaining their relationship to the couple. Possible headings include "In Loving Memory," "In Memory Of," "In Memoriam," or "We Remember."
Other Ways to Honour Deceased Parents
In addition to the program, you can honour deceased parents in other ways:
- Set up a memorial table with their photos, candles, and other meaningful items.
- Include a "moment of remembrance" during the ceremony to honour those who couldn't be present.
- Incorporate special items or jewellery belonging to the deceased parent(s) in your wedding attire or decor, and ensure the photographer captures these details.
- Include a "thank you" section in the program, expressing gratitude to your parents for all they've done, without naming them individually.
Remember, there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Discuss with your partner and close family, and go with what feels right for you.
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Memorial table
Planning a wedding can be challenging when dealing with the loss of a loved one. Creating a memorial table is a thoughtful way to honour deceased friends or family members and ensure their presence at your wedding in spirit. Here are some ideas for a memorial table:
Photos and Personal Items
Displaying framed photos of your late loved ones is a beautiful way to honour them. You can create a photo collage or installation on a table at the ceremony or reception. Besides photos, you can also include personal items or belongings that remind you of the person. This could be a family heirloom, their favourite book, or even their cufflinks or a piece of jewellery that you can wear on the day.
Candles and Flowers
Candles are an excellent way to symbolize that your late loved one's memory still shines brightly. You can choose to light a candle publicly during the ceremony or in a private moment. Flowers can also be used as part of the memorial table, perhaps with a tag attached that says something like "we walk with you" and includes the names of the deceased.
Music and Food
Music is a powerful way to evoke memories. Consider creating a playlist for the reception that includes songs that were special to your loved one or simply remind you of them. If you're looking for unique wedding memorial ideas, consider incorporating their favourite dishes or snacks into the wedding menu.
Involving Guests
If you wish to involve your guests in the memorial, you can set up the memorial at the guestbook table, so they can see and appreciate it. Alternatively, you can ask your priest or officiant to lead a moment of silence for those who are no longer with you at the beginning of the ceremony.
The memorial table is a way to celebrate the lives of those who have passed and ensure their presence at your wedding. It's important to consider what feels right for you and your partner, and how you can best honour your loved ones while also enjoying your special day.
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Including deceased parent in wedding invitation
Including deceased parents in a wedding invitation can be tricky, and it's understandable to have many questions about how to go about it. Here are some ways to include them:
Wording and Formatting
You can include your deceased parent's name on the invitation with the addition of "the late" before their name. For example, "the late Mr. and Mrs. John Jones". This is a common way to indicate that a parent has passed away. Alternatively, on some Jewish wedding invitations, people use the phrase "of blessed memory" instead of "the late".
If you are inviting from a same-sex couple perspective, here is an example of how to format your invitation:
> "Mrs. Sharon Henderson, daughter of the late Mr. & Mrs. Whoever, and Mrs. Emily Hanson, daughter of Mrs. Whoever and the late Mr. Whoever, request the honor of your presence at their wedding."
Memorial Sections
If you are uncomfortable with including your deceased parent's name directly on the invitation, you can choose to include a memorial section on your wedding program or invitation. This can be titled "In Loving Memory" or "Thank You", where you can list your deceased parent's name and honour their memory. This way, you can acknowledge their absence while still including them symbolically.
Honouring Their Presence
Some people choose to include a note in their programs or invitations, thanking their parents for all they have done for them, without specifically naming those who have passed away. This can be a subtle way to honour their memory while maintaining a positive tone.
Memorial Tables
If you or your partner are spiritual, you may want to include a memorial table or a note that says, " [Name of deceased parent] is here with us in spirit/thought". This can be a sweet way to include them in the celebrations without directly naming them on the invitation.
Ultimately, the decision of how to include your deceased parent in your wedding invitation is a personal one. Go with your heart, and consider what would feel most meaningful and comfortable for you and your partner. Your guests will undoubtedly be touched by your tribute, and your parent's memory will be honoured.
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Wording and formatting
When it comes to the wording and formatting of your wedding program, there are a few options to consider when including a deceased parent. Firstly, decide where in the program you want to place the mention of your deceased parent(s). Most couples choose to place these mentions at the end of the program to separate the more emotional portion from the celebratory content.
You can choose to format the deceased relatives' names in a paragraph or a list. If you opt for a list, you may want to divide it into two columns: one for names and another for explaining their relationship to the couple, for example, "Grandmother of the Bride".
- "In Loving Memory"
- "In Memory Of"
- "In Memoriam"
- "We Remember"
- "We'd like to remember those close to us who are no longer with us but looking down on this special day"
- "Parents of the Groom - Dr. FFIL and Ms. FMIL (may her memory be a blessing)"
- "Parents of the Bride - Mr. and Mrs. John William Doe and The Late Mr. Roger Smith"
- "Dedication - On this special day in our lives, we lovingly remember Mr. Roger Smith, Father of the Bride"
- "The flowers on the altar are placed... in loving memory of Mr. Roger Smith, Father of the Bride"
- "The candle in the narthex burns brightly in loving memory of Mr. Roger Smith, Father of the Bride"
- "In Loving Memory of Those We Wish Could Be Here - [names]"
If you would like to include a more spiritual message, you could say something like, " [Name] is here with us in spirit/thought". Alternatively, you could simply express gratitude with a note that says, "Thank you to our parents for all they've done for us".
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Placement in the program
When it comes to the placement of a deceased parent's name in a wedding program, there are a few options to consider. Firstly, it is important to respect the wishes of the person who has lost their parent. If they do not want any mention of their deceased parent, that decision should be respected. However, if they wish to include their parent, there are several ways to do so tastefully and respectfully.
One option is to include a dedicated "In Loving Memory" or "In Memoriam" section in the program. This section can be placed at the end of the program to separate the melancholy portion from the celebratory content. In this section, you can list the names of the deceased parents and other loved ones, along with their relationship to the couple, such as "Father of the Bride" or "Mother of the Groom." You can also include a heartfelt message, such as "We'd like to remember those close to us who are no longer with us but are looking down on this special day."
Another option is to include a dedication message on the cover or at the beginning of the program. For example, "This celebration is dedicated to the memory of [name], father of the bride." This approach ensures that the deceased parent is honoured at the very start of the program.
Some couples choose to list the deceased parent under the wedding party section, using wording such as "Parents of the Groom - Dr. FFIL and Ms. FMIL (may her memory be a blessing)." This approach acknowledges the parent's role in the wedding while also indicating their absence. However, it is important to consider the preferences of the couple and their families, as some may find this approach uncomfortable.
Including a memorial table with photos, candles, or other meaningful items can also be a beautiful way to honour a deceased parent. This allows for a physical representation of their memory at the wedding without necessarily including them in the program.
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Frequently asked questions
You can include a deceased parent in your wedding program by listing them under an "In Loving Memory" or "In Memoriam" section. You can also include a dedication, such as "On this special day in our lives, we lovingly remember [name], Father of the Bride."
Etiquette dictates that loved ones who are deceased be listed in a separate “In Memoriam” section of your program, not as “Parents of the Groom/Bride”. You can include a note such as "may her memory be a blessing" or "we know you'd be here today if heaven wasn't so far away."
In addition to including them in your wedding program, you can set up a memorial table with framed photos, candles, and other meaningful items. You can also carry a bouquet charm with a favourite saying or include their wedding ring in your photos.











































