Weddings And Plus Ones: To Bring Or Not To Bring?

do you have to have a date for a wedding

So, you've said yes – now what? One of the first big decisions you'll make is choosing a date for your wedding. There are many factors to consider, and it can be a daunting task. From meaningful moments in your relationship to the availability of your dream venue, here's a quick guide to help you settle on a date for your big day.

Characteristics Values
Average engagement length 12-18 months
Average time to wait before picking a date 4 weeks
Most popular wedding months May through October
Least popular wedding months November through January
Holidays to avoid Christmas, Thanksgiving
Holidays that could work New Year's Eve, July 4th weekend
Astrological dates to avoid Venus Retrograde, Void of Course Moon Transits
Astrological dates to consider New Moon, New Moon during Libra Season, Solar Eclipse, Jupiter Transit, Saturn Transit

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Sentimental value: grandparents' or parents' wedding date, first meeting, etc

While it's not necessary to have a date to attend a wedding, it is a great opportunity to celebrate love and spend quality time with someone special. If you're looking for ways to add sentimental value to your wedding, here are some heartwarming ideas centred around your grandparents or parents:

Wedding Date

Choosing a wedding date that holds significance for your family can be a beautiful way to honour your loved ones. Here are some options to consider:

  • Your grandparents' or parents' wedding anniversary: Celebrating your wedding on the same date as your grandparents or parents did is a meaningful way to pay tribute to their enduring love and create a multi-generational connection.
  • Anniversary of your first date: Another option is to tie the knot on the anniversary of your first date or the day you officially became a couple. This symbolises the growth of your relationship and the start of a new chapter.
  • Special dates with cultural significance: Some cultures have traditional methods for choosing an auspicious wedding date. For example, Japanese families may refer to the koyomi, an ancient astrological calendar.

First Meeting

Incorporating elements from your grandparents' or parents' love story into your wedding day can add a layer of sentimentality and intergenerational bond. Here are a few ideas:

  • Display family photos: Create a visual journey by lining your wedding aisle with photos of your grandparents or parents throughout their lives, starting with baby photos at the back and progressing to more recent images as guests walk towards the altar.
  • Recreate a special photo: If you have access to your grandparents' or parents' wedding album, recreate their favourite photo or a memorable shot from their early dating days. It will be a fun way to honour their legacy and create a lasting keepsake.
  • Include family heirlooms: Integrate family heirlooms into your wedding attire or décor. For example, you could wrap a piece of your mother's wedding dress fabric around your bouquet or wear a piece of your grandmother's jewellery as your "something borrowed."

Other Sentimental Ideas

  • Special dances: Pay tribute to your grandparents or parents by playing their first dance song and dedicating a special dance to them. It will be a touching moment for everyone present.
  • Signature drinks: Create signature cocktails that reflect the tastes of your grandparents or parents, and name them after each couple. It's a fun way to involve your guests and offer a unique twist on traditional toasts.
  • Personalised fashion: Embroider meaningful dates, hidden messages, or monograms into your wedding attire. For example, you could stitch your wedding date into the hem of your dress using blue thread for your "something blue."
  • Guest book alternatives: Instead of a traditional guest book, consider displaying small wooden hearts for guests to sign and drop into a shadow box frame. Alternatively, have each guest sign a scrap of fabric, then compile the pieces into a quilt to display in your home. These unique mementos will serve as lasting reminders of your special day.

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Family availability: holidays, pregnancies, health limitations

When it comes to choosing a wedding date, there are several factors to consider, especially regarding family availability. Here are some tips to help you navigate the process:

Holidays

When considering a wedding date, it's essential to be mindful of holidays. If you have a large guest list that includes distant relatives and friends, it's best to avoid family-oriented holidays like Christmas and Thanksgiving. Wedding planner Lisa Costin advises that "guests are often spending time with family or vacationing" during these periods. However, holidays like New Year's Eve and the July 4th weekend can be festive and fun options for your celebration.

Pregnancies

While it may not be the first thing that comes to mind, pregnancies within the family can impact your wedding date choice. If you have close family members or friends who are expecting, you may want to consider their due dates and plan your wedding around that. This can ensure that those you want to be present at your wedding can attend without the worry of a newborn or the discomfort of a late-stage pregnancy.

Health Limitations

It's important to consider the health limitations of your family members and loved ones when choosing a wedding date. For example, if a family member is undergoing treatment for an illness, you may want to choose a date when they are likely to be feeling well enough to attend. Additionally, if you have elderly relatives, ensure the date works for them, especially if they have limited mobility or health conditions that may impact their ability to travel.

Seasonal Considerations

The time of year you choose for your wedding can also impact family availability. For example, if you're planning an outdoor wedding, consider the climate of your chosen location to ensure your guests' comfort. Colder months like late November through January typically see fewer weddings, but that doesn't mean they are any less magical. You may also want to consider peak and off-peak seasons, as prices tend to be higher during popular months, and you'll have more venue options during off-peak times.

In conclusion, when selecting a wedding date, it's important to be mindful of your loved ones' availability and circumstances. By considering holidays, pregnancies, and health limitations, you can choose a date that works for those you want to be present on your special day. Remember, giving yourself enough time to plan and sending out save-the-dates in advance will also help ensure that your guests can attend and share your joy.

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Supplier availability: dream venue, savings, special rates

When it comes to your dream venue, it's important to remember that the availability of your chosen venue will likely have the biggest influence on the date of your wedding. While some couples choose a date that's special to them and then find a venue that can accommodate it, others opt for the latter method, which gives them more venue options.

If you have a specific venue in mind, it's a good idea to reach out to them as early as possible to inquire about their availability. This will help you narrow down your potential wedding dates and ensure that you can secure your dream venue.

Now, let's talk about savings and special rates. Wedding expenses can add up quickly, so it's essential to be mindful of your budget and look for ways to save. One way to do this is by considering off-peak dates for your wedding. Peak wedding season is typically between May and October, so prices tend to be higher during these months. By choosing an off-peak date, you can often take advantage of discounted prices and have a wider selection of venues and vendors to choose from.

Another strategy for saving money is to choose a weekday wedding instead of a traditional Saturday night celebration. Weekday weddings are usually more affordable, as venues and vendors may offer lower rates during these less popular days. Additionally, with more people working remotely, your guests may have greater flexibility to attend a wedding during the week.

To further maximize your savings, consider negotiating with vendors. While it's important to be respectful and courteous when discussing rates, don't be afraid to ask about potential discounts or special packages they may offer. Vendors may be willing to work with you to create a customized package that fits within your budget.

Lastly, don't underestimate the power of referrals and recommendations. Ask your venue for their list of preferred vendors, as they may have partnerships that can result in special rates for you. You can also ask your married friends about their experiences and if they have any suggestions for cost-effective suppliers. By leveraging the experiences of others, you may be able to find suppliers who not only fit your budget but also provide excellent service.

Remember, by giving yourself enough time to plan and explore your options, you can increase your chances of securing your dream venue and finding special rates that align with your budget.

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Lucky dates: numerology, astrology, cultural traditions

Lucky dates for weddings vary across religions and cultures. Here are some ways to choose a lucky date for your wedding, based on numerology, astrology, and cultural traditions.

Numerology

According to numerology, life path numbers and angel numbers are considered auspicious. An ideal wedding date based on numerology can be calculated using the life path formula, which is essentially your birth date, month, and year added together based on their numbers. For example, April is 04, which is 0+4=4. You carry this on for the date and year as well. So, someone born on April 21, 1993, would calculate their life path number as follows: 0+4+2+1+1+9+9+3=29. Then, 2+9=11, and 1+1=2. So, someone born on April 21, 1993, has a life path number of 2. Couples should compare life path numbers, and the sum of their two numbers would be the lucky number to plan their wedding date around.

Angel numbers are typically two to four-number sequences with repetition or patterns of digits, such as 888 or 5656. Some common angel dates that would make for lucky wedding dates include:

  • January 1: 111 is said to be a "green light" from the universe.
  • February 22: 222 is symbolic of balance, alignment, and trust.
  • August 8: Eight is considered the most divine number in numerology as it is a symbol of infinity.

Astrology

Many couples consult the cosmos to choose an auspicious wedding date. Here are some astrologically lucky dates to get married:

  • Waxing Moon: The time after a new moon when the moon is "renewed" is considered lucky.
  • Supermoon: Supermoons are said to be a time of heightened energy and connection to positive change. They are also great for outdoor weddings as the moon will provide extra light.
  • Summer Solstice: It is considered lucky in many cultures to get married on the midsummer solstice, which Druids considered the wedding of heaven and earth.
  • Full Moon: Getting married on a full moon can be beautiful if your party goes on after dark, as it serves as "cosmic decor".
  • Blue Moon: The exceedingly rare event of a second full moon in a month is said to bring luck, enchantment, and connection to the divine. The next blue moon is Sunday, May 31, 2026.

Cultural Traditions

Lucky wedding dates vary across cultures and religions. Here are some examples:

  • Jewish tradition: In the Jewish calendar, Tuesdays are considered lucky because, in the story of creation in the Torah, Tuesday is the only day that God reiterates that everything is "good". The number 18 is also considered lucky in Jewish culture because the Hebrew letters that spell "chai", meaning "life", add up to 18.
  • Chinese Zodiac Calendar: In Chinese culture and many East Asian cultures, the number eight is considered lucky because it sounds like the word for "prosperity". The number nine is also considered lucky because it sounds like the word for "long-lasting" in Cantonese. Thus, dates with the number eight or nine are considered lucky, especially 8/8 or August 8th.
  • Christian Calendar: While times like Lent are considered unlucky, the festive period leading up to the birth of Jesus Christ, known as Advent, is a lucky time for weddings. The season of Christmas, which lasts through Epiphany in mid-February, is also a celebratory season in the Christian calendar and a great time for a wedding.
  • Hindu Culture: Hindu couples often consult an astrologer or use a 'muhurat calendar' to select an auspicious date according to Vedic astrology.
  • Islam: There are no specific lucky dates for weddings in Islam, but some unlucky dates to avoid include Muharram and the duration of Ramadan.
  • Holidays: While some holidays like National Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day (December 7) and September 11 are generally avoided, others like New Year's Eve align beautifully with weddings.
  • Days of the week: While Saturdays are the most common wedding day, they are not necessarily the luckiest. Tuesdays are considered lucky according to the Jewish calendar, and Wednesdays are considered lucky based on a Celtic folk rhyme.

Ultimately, the lucky date for your wedding depends on your personal beliefs and cultural background.

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Seasonality: weather, costs, travel plans

When it comes to choosing a wedding date, seasonality is a crucial factor that influences various aspects, from weather conditions and costs to travel plans. Here are some detailed insights to guide your decision-making process:

Weather:

The weather plays a significant role in shaping the style, location, and overall mood of your wedding. Opting for an outdoor ceremony or reception naturally increases your exposure to the elements. Aiming for mild temperatures, clear skies, and a lower chance of rain or snow can enhance the comfort of your guests and ensure smooth proceedings. Peak summer months can be hot and humid, so finding a balance between sunshine and bearable heat is essential. On the other hand, spring and autumn weddings offer colourful backdrops and more pleasant weather, especially in the Northeast and East Coast regions. If you're dreaming of a beach wedding, consider tide predictions to avoid an unexpected splash during the ceremony!

Costs:

Seasonality significantly impacts wedding costs, including venue, décor, and floral rates. Generally, late spring through early fall is considered the wedding season, with June and September being the most popular months. Consequently, prices tend to be higher during this period due to high demand. If you're looking to save on costs, consider an off-peak season wedding, such as winter, excluding December when holiday parties drive up prices. Planning a wedding during the low season can score you discounted rates and a better selection of venues and vendors. Keep in mind that certain regions, like the Midwest, Southwest, and the South, have different peak seasons based on their unique climates.

Travel Plans:

The season you choose for your wedding can also impact the travel plans and expenses of your guests, especially those travelling from out of town. Tying the knot during a destination's off-season can result in significantly lower travel costs for your guests, as flights and hotel rooms are typically more affordable during this period. However, it's essential to avoid scheduling your wedding on major holidays or long weekends, as your guests' existing travel plans may clash with your special day. Similarly, be mindful of local events, major sporting events, conventions, and festivals that could result in sold-out hotels, high airfares, and heavy traffic.

In conclusion, when selecting a wedding date, consider the seasonality in terms of weather, costs, and travel plans. Opt for seasons with pleasant weather, choose off-peak months to save on expenses, and be mindful of your guests' travel arrangements and potential conflicts with local events. By considering these factors, you can make an informed decision that aligns with your vision, budget, and the overall experience of your guests.

Frequently asked questions

No, most of the time, a wedding is more fun without a plus-one.

There's no rule for this. Some couples enjoy the engagement period and take their time, while others prefer to get straight to planning. The average length of an engagement in the US is 12 to 18 months.

Saturdays in May through October are typically peak dates. The most popular wedding date in the US has usually been in October, but early November is gaining popularity.

Some things to consider are sentimental value, family and supplier availability, your favourite time of year, and your honeymoon plans.

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