George Boyle
Wedding invitations are a chance to make your guests feel special and welcomed. Addressing them correctly is the first step in setting the right tone for your big day. There are many different scenarios to consider when addressing your invites, from married couples with the same last name to unmarried couples living together, same-sex couples, and those with distinguished titles. The outer envelope is more formal and traditionally uses titles and full names, whereas the inner envelope is more informal, giving you the option to use first names only.
What You'll Learn
Married Couple, Same Last Name
When addressing a wedding invitation to a married couple with the same last name, there are a few options to consider. The outer envelope is typically more formal, and you can use titles and full names. For a heterosexual couple, the traditional format is "Mr. and Mrs. [husband's first name] [last name]". For a same-sex couple, either name can go first. If the couple might prefer a more modern or gender-neutral approach, you can simply use their first and last names, or for a non-binary guest, use "Mx."
Outer envelope (formal):
- "Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Warren"
- "Mr. and Mrs. Warren"
- "Mr. Thomas Warren and Mrs. Michelle Warren"
Inner envelope (informal):
- "Mr. and Mrs. Warren"
- "Thomas and Michelle"
- "Mr. Warren and Mrs. Warren"
If you are inviting children as well, you can include their names on the inner envelope. For girls under 18, you can use "Miss" if you wish, while boys don't need a title until they are 16.
Outer envelope: "Mr. and Mrs. Alan Thompson"
Inner envelope: "Alan, Emily, Roger, Chance, Miss Jennifer, and Miss Lily"
If you are hosting an informal wedding, you can use a more casual format. While this is generally not recommended, it can be appropriate for a very casual event.
Informal envelope addressing for a married couple:
"Thomas and Michelle Warren"
Informal envelope addressing for a kid-friendly wedding:
"The Warren Family"
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Married Couple, Different Last Names
When addressing wedding invitations to a married couple with different last names, the outer envelope should include both of their full names, with the woman's name coming first, followed by "and" the man's name. The woman's title should be "Ms." and the man's title should be "Mr.". For example:
> "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez"
If the combined names are too long to fit on one line, list them separately. For the inner envelope, you can use their titles and last names or just their first names:
> "Ms. Stevens and Mr. Estevez" or "Maria and David"
If you are inviting children as well, you can include their names on the second line.
> "Ms. Maria Stevens and Mr. David Estevez
> Anders and Sue"
If you are having a more informal wedding, you can drop the titles and use just their first and last names. For example:
> "Maria Stevens and David Estevez"
If the couple has children, you can address the invitation to "The [Last Name] Family".
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Married Couple, One Hyphenated Last Name
When addressing a wedding invitation to a married couple with one hyphenated last name, there are a few different options depending on the couple's preferences and the formality of the wedding. Here are some examples:
Formal Addressing:
For a more formal wedding invitation, the outer envelope can be addressed using the following formats:
- Mr. Michael Jones and Ms. Mary Smith-Jones
- Ms. Mary Smith-Jones and Mr. Michael Jones (woman's name first)
The inner envelope can be more informal, and you can address it as follows:
- Mr. Jones and Ms. Smith-Jones
- Mary and Michael
Modern Addressing:
If you prefer a more modern approach, you can include both spouses' first names. The outer envelope can be addressed as:
Mr. Michael Jones and Mrs. Mary Jones
For the inner envelope, you have more flexibility:
- Mr. and Mrs. Jones
- Michael and Mary
Informal Addressing:
For an informal or casual wedding, you can simplify the addressing format. The outer envelope can be addressed as:
Michael and Mary Jones
If you are inviting children as well, you can use the family name:
The Jones Family
Remember, it is essential to consider the couple's preferences and what feels most comfortable for you. The provided examples are a guide, and you can adjust them to fit your specific situation and relationship with the couple.
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Unmarried Couple
When addressing wedding invitations to unmarried couples, there are a few options to consider. If the couple lives together, their names should be included on the same line, with the person you are closest to listed first. If you are equally close to both, go in alphabetical order. Here is an example:
Outer envelope: "Mr. Stanley Kim and Ms. Amanda Rhee"
Inner envelope: "Mr. Kim and Ms. Rhee" or "Stanley and Amanda"
If the couple does not live together, it is best to send separate invitations to each guest.
It is important to note that the outer envelope is more formal and includes the full name and title of the recipient(s). The inner envelope is more informal and may include only the first name of the recipient(s).
Additionally, when addressing unmarried couples, it is essential to avoid using nicknames or abbreviations. It is also worth mentioning that the use of "Ms." or "Miss" depends on the age of the female partner, with "Ms." being used for women over 18 and "Miss" for those under 18.
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Single Guest
When addressing a wedding invitation to a single person, it's important to use their preferred title. If you're unsure, it's best to leave out the title altogether. For example, if you're inviting a single female guest, use "Ms." if she is over 18. If she is younger, use "Miss", and spell it out rather than abbreviating it as an initial. On the outer envelope, this would look like "Ms. Stephanie Chen" or "Miss Stephanie Chen" (if she is younger than 18). On the inner envelope, you can use "Ms. Chen" or "Miss Chen" or "Stephanie".
If your single guest has been offered a plus-one, you don't need to indicate this on the outer envelope. Instead, use "and guest" language on the inner envelope only. So, the outer envelope would be addressed to "Mr. James Montgomery", and the inner envelope to "Mr. Montgomery and guest" or "James and guest".
If you're inviting a single person with a distinguished title, such as a doctor, lawyer, judge, or military personnel, it's proper etiquette to address them by that title on the wedding invitation envelope. For example, if your guest is a doctor, the outer envelope could be addressed to "Doctor Tami Takata", and the inner envelope to "Dr. Takata".
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Frequently asked questions
For a formal invitation, you can address them as "Mr. and Mrs. [husband's first name] [shared last name]". For a more casual invite, you can simply use their first names, e.g., " [first name] and [first name]".
In this case, you would list their names separately, with the person you are closest to, or the woman's name, first. For a formal invitation, you would write, for example, "Mrs. [wife's first name] [wife's last name] and Mr. [husband's first name] [husband's last name]". For an informal invite, you can leave out the titles and just use their first names.
The person with the distinguished title should be listed first, regardless of gender. For a formal invitation, use "Dr. [name] and Mr./Mrs. [name]" or "Lieutenant [name], US Navy and Mrs./Mr. [name]". For an informal invite, you can leave out the titles and use first names only.
For a formal invitation, the couple's names should be listed separately, with the person you are closest to, or the woman, listed first. For example, "Ms. [woman's first name] [woman's last name] and Mr. [man's first name] [man's last name]". For an informal invite, you can list their first names only, e.g., " [first name] and [first name]".
