Bridesmaids' Dresses: Who Picks Them?

Bridesmaids' dresses are a big part of a wedding day, and typically, the bride chooses the style and colour. However, bridesmaids should also have a say in what they wear, as how they feel in a dress is important for how the brides feel on their day. Bridesmaids' dresses should match the formality of the wedding, the venue, and the bride's dress. The season and time of year should also guide fabric and colour choices. While the bride has the final say, it is important to be considerate of the bridesmaids' budgets and lifestyles, as well as their body shapes and skin tones.

Bridesmaids' comfort and happiness

The happiness and comfort of your bridesmaids on your wedding day are important. While it is your special day, you want your bridesmaids to feel good about how they look and be comfortable in what they are wearing.

Involving your bridesmaids in the decision-making process

It is traditional for the bride to choose the bridesmaids' dresses, but it is also important to encourage your bridesmaids to have a say in what they wear. After all, how your bridesmaids look is a reflection of how you feel on your wedding day. Ask your bridesmaids about the colours they like and how they feel in a particular dress. You can also ask them to suggest tones that complement the colour scheme you have chosen. Remember, different shades will suit different skin tones, and a tonal fabric mix can look stunning.

Considering their comfort

When choosing a dress, it is important to consider the comfort of your bridesmaids. Think about the venue and the weather. If you are having a beach wedding, opt for something lightweight and flowy. For a winter wedding, avoid strapless silhouettes and provide wraps or cover-ups if your bridesmaids will be outside in the cold. If the wedding is in a sunny location, choose breathable dresses and skip the heavy frocks with sleeves. If the wedding is in a rustic barn, pretty lace bridesmaids' dresses are a perfect choice. For a black-tie reception in a grand ballroom, sequin dresses or fully beaded gowns will create a glamorous, elegant look.

Budget

Discuss the budget for the dresses with your bridesmaids. Be transparent about how much you expect them to spend, and be mindful of their financial situation. Bridesmaids' dresses can be expensive, especially if alterations are needed. If you are concerned about the cost, consider renting the dresses or choosing a specific colour and letting your bridesmaids pick their own style off the rack.

Timeline

Start looking for bridesmaids' dresses early. It is recommended to have an idea of the dresses at least six to eight months before the wedding. This will give your bridesmaids enough time to order their dresses and have any necessary alterations made.

Mismatched dresses

A current trend is for bridesmaids to wear mismatched dresses. This can be a great way to ensure your bridesmaids are comfortable and feel confident. You can provide guidelines for colour and fabric, and your bridesmaids can choose a hue, cut and fabric that suits them. This option also allows them to set their own budget.

Remember, it is important to keep the lines of communication open with your bridesmaids and be considerate of their feelings, preferences, and budgets. By involving them in the decision-making process and considering their comfort, you can ensure they will look and feel their best on your special day.

Budget

Who Pays?

Traditionally, bridesmaids are expected to pay for their own dresses and accessories, but if the bride can afford to, it is becoming more common for her to pay for, or subsidise, the dresses as a thoughtful gesture. This is especially true if the bride has chosen a more expensive dress.

Cost

The cost of a bridesmaid's dress can vary wildly, from $30 to upwards of $800. The average cost is somewhere between $100 and $800. It is important for brides to be mindful of their bridesmaids' budgets when choosing a dress, and to have open and honest conversations about money.

Saving Money

There are several ways to save money on bridesmaids' dresses:

• Letting bridesmaids choose their own dresses within a specific colour palette and style can be more affordable and re-wearable.
• Look for pre-owned dresses on eBay or Poshmark.
• Opt for mismatched dresses, which can be easier to find at a lower price point, and more comfortable and flattering for different body types.
• Renting dresses from sites like Rent the Runway can be a more affordable option, and means your bridesmaids won't be left with a one-hit-wonder hanging in their closet.
• Choose a dress from a more affordable brand, like Birdy Grey, which retails dresses for under $100, or Lulus, which offers stylish options for under $100.
• Give your bridesmaids plenty of time to save up for the dress by choosing the style as early as possible.

Other Costs

It's important to remember that the dress is not the only cost for a bridesmaid. They may also need to pay for hair and makeup appointments, transportation and accommodation for the wedding, and any pre-wedding events like the bridal shower and bachelorette party. These costs can add up quickly, especially for destination weddings, so it's important for brides to be mindful of the overall financial burden on their bridesmaids.

Dress style and colour

The bride's wedding dress and the venue of the wedding usually determine the bridesmaids' attire. For instance, if the bride is wearing a boho-chic wedding gown, chiffon dresses would be a good choice for the bridesmaids. Similarly, for a rustic barn setting, pretty lace bridesmaid dresses are perfect. For a black-tie reception in a grand ballroom, sequin dresses or fully beaded gowns are a glamorous and elegant choice.

The fabric and colour of the bridesmaids' dresses should also be guided by the season and time of year. Dark colours in heavier fabrics such as faille, velvet, and crepe back satin are best for autumn and winter weddings, while pastel chiffon dresses are ideal for spring and summer celebrations. If you want your bridesmaids to be able to wear their dresses again, opt for casual fabrics such as chiffon and jersey.

If you want your bridesmaids to wear the same dress, you can choose a style and colour that you like and ask all your bridesmaids to wear it. However, it is also common for brides to choose a colour and length, and let their bridesmaids pick the style of their choice. You can also choose a different dress for the maid of honour so that she stands out.

If you are stuck on where to start, you can book an appointment with a stylist who can suggest the best colours for your bridesmaids and your colour scheme.

Venue and formality

When it comes to bridesmaids' dresses, the venue and formality of the wedding play a crucial role in determining the appropriate attire. Here are some insights to guide you through the process:

• Church or House of Worship: Aim for classic and sophisticated styles. Full-length gowns or knee-length dresses with structured silhouettes are ideal. Opt for elegant fabrics like satin and chiffon, and avoid short hemlines or revealing styles.
• Ballroom Wedding: This calls for a formal and luxurious ambiance. Full-length gowns are recommended, with modern or traditional styles. Choose timeless colours and consider off-the-shoulder or halter necklines for a signature look. Chiffon is a comfortable and elegant fabric choice.
• Rustic Venues like Barns: The intimate and casual nature of these venues calls for relaxed silhouettes and vintage-inspired styles. Lace bridal gowns and dresses with lace accents create a cohesive texture. Knee-length hemlines are preferable, and you can mix and match necklines and colours from the same family.
• Beach Wedding: Go for casual and relaxed styles, with short and smart dresses to avoid any tripping on the sand. Fun and flirty styles, bright tropical colours or neutral shades, and breathable fabrics are ideal. Keep accessories minimal and comfortable.
• Garden Wedding: Opt for romantic, feminine patterns, soft flowy fabrics, and pastel or muted colours. Lace adds a delicate touch. Keep the hemlines short to suit the outdoor setting and consider mixing and matching necklines to suit different styles.
• City Hall Wedding: This formal setting calls for structured and well-tailored gowns or cocktail dresses, either full-length or below knee-length. Experiment with stylish yet modest necklines and keep accessories, hair, and makeup simple.

Remember, these are just guidelines, and you can always add your personal touch to the bridesmaids' attire while ensuring it aligns with the venue and formality of your special day.

Timing

It is recommended that brides have an idea of the dresses they would like their bridesmaids to wear at least six to eight months before the wedding. This will give bridesmaids enough time to order their dresses and account for any alterations. It usually takes about two to three months for bridesmaid dresses to arrive.

If you have a pregnant bridesmaid, they should wait until as close to the wedding as possible to have their final fitting, but they should not delay placing their dress order. It is important to place all dress orders at the same time, especially if your bridesmaids are going to wear the same colour. Ordering dresses at the same time ensures that they will be coloured with the same dye lot.

If you are planning on buying your bridesmaids' dresses online, make sure to start early and be aware of the return policy.

Frequently asked questions